Faction Before Blood: My Faction is My Blood
by Lunaschild2016
Summary: She was the bastard of a Daunltess and an Erudite. The product of a teenage affair that turned deadly. Now she returns to what she has always felt was her home faction, Dauntless. She has a mission that vows to complete or die trying. Too much and too many are at stake if she fails. A certain ruthless leader vows to make sure that her dying never happens. Eric/oc, AU, No War T/M
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is me editing and fixing things that bother me about the grammar or inconsistencies. Nothing big has changed otherwise.**

 _Eric_

"Yo Eric! Wait up."

I growl lowly in annoyance "Fucking what! What do you want Logan?" I snap at my friend.

He narrows his eyes at me "Hey, don't forget who you are talking to here punk. I've wiped the floor with your ass before and I will do it again. I was going to be a good friend and offer to pick you up some coffee when I go to get mine. Then bring it with me to the control room to watch the choosing ceremony."

He turns to walk off and I let out a sigh. "Fine. You're right and I was being a dick. Fucking Jeanine is just pissing me the fuck off again." I run my hands through my hair scratching the newly growing out sides.

"Who the fuck is she not pissing off nowadays? I am so fucking glad Max and the other three take her word like a fart on the wind."

"Real eloquent way of putting that Logan." I roll my eyes at him. "If you wouldn't mind? I would kill for some coffee."

He shrugs. "Coffee it is then. Just a forewarning. Max asked Four to watch too. Not sure why, even if he is training he hasn't cared about the ceremony before."

"Fan-fucking-tastic. As if my day isn't already going to be shitty enough dealing with the new initiates." I scowl and turn to go.

Logan stops me and puts a hand on my shoulder and looks at me debating something. "You know that rumor about Matthew's, her affair and a kid?"

My lips thin in thought. "Yeah, not sure how true that is but yeah. Why?"

"Because it's not a rumor. Supposedly the kid is a girl and this is her 18th year. She chooses this year." He quietly said.

"Not that it really fucking matters to us but why are telling me?" I had a feeling exactly why he was telling me and it was going to fuck up my day even more.

"Because my intel says she is coming here. We need to find out who it is. So look for Jeanine's face closely when any Erudite girls choose us." He looks at me pointedly.

"Yeah, I won't lie. I hope she stays the fuck where she belongs." I snarl out and turn to head to the control room. Maybe that was what Max has asked number boy to look out for too.

Whatever. I wasn't going to start getting twisted about how much Max wanted Four in leadership still. I had three years to get over that shit and I wasn't about to start going down that road again.

Two Hours Later and Logan and I are sitting further away from Four and his buddy Zeke and watching the Choosing ceremony. The only indication Jeanine had shown for any transfer was for the two Prior kids. One was the girl stiff and she was coming to Dauntless.

I caught Four's expression and when she defected and I can say I saw interest there. The brother went to Erudite which was pretty interesting. Jeanine looked pleased by both defections to be honest.

There were only two female Erudite transfers coming to Dauntless neither looked anything like Jeanine and she didn't seem to care one way or the other about them transferring.

"Well that was a bust." Logan said disappointed.

"No shit. Initiates look like shit and no baby Matthews. Honestly I say more fucking power to her for staying in Erudite. I sure as hell wouldn't want to have to put up with her. Look, I am going to go try and prepare for the shit show." I said sarcastically as I toss my coffee cup in the trash.

"Prepare? You mean you are going to try and go style that mop you are currently calling your hair. Why did you decide to let the sides grow in again?" He asked chuckling.

"Figured since I was finally out from under the Erudite bitches thumb change was in order. I just forgot how fucking curly it gets and how annoying having more hair is."

"Hmm. Well I'm sure it will make some new initiates panties go all moist at the site of it." He punches my shoulder laughing.

"Yeah no, that's not happening. I don't need some moony eyed girl trying to follow me around. I'll stick to my casual set up I got going."

"Suit yourself. I don't regret hooking up with Milla though." He shrugged.

Milla had been a transfer two years ago from Amity and they had gotten together at the end of initiation when he finally got her to say yes to a date with him. They seemed happy and weathered the stir it caused with him being a leader and her being an initiate. Still wasn't something I would do.

We split off and I head to my apartment to change and style my hair. Until early this year I had kept the style of the sides shaved and the middle slightly longer and heavily styled. When I made the change I cut the middle hair shorter and started growing in the sides so they were filled in. I still styled it to keep the curl from doing it's thing and because it darkened the blonde hair a bit.

I headed to the roof where the initiates would jump onto from the train, and then a long four weeks would be starting.

 _Zoe POV_

"Their jumping!" Someone called. I looked to Christina and Beatrice, who I had just met and they looked shocked.

I grinned and winked at them. "No time like the present."

I moved to be behind the Dauntless-born that were getting a running start, watched one land and noted how, then took off after them. I didn't land perfect but well enough. Until I was bowled over by someone and he landed right smack on top of me, grinning down on me.

"Son of a bitch! You did that shit on purpose!" All I got was a wink so I slammed my knee into his junk and rolled myself over. Then I jumped up pissed as hell and my red hair coming loose of its braid.

He wheezed and clutched his junk. "Fucking hell Zoe. You didn't have to rack me."

"You're lucky I didn't fucking do worse to you Peter!" I yell and stomp off leaving his little goons to help him. I should have known the asshole wouldn't stop.

I was making my way to the front of the crowd and to the Dauntless standing on the ledge so I could hear what was said when I was pulled up short and stopped.

"Get fucking back here Zoe. Don't go up there with them." He said contemptuously to the Dauntless-born. I see them turn and snarl at him and the guy on the ledge glare down at us. Fucking great Peter!

I yank my arm back from him and he tries to grab it again. I see the guy on the ledge glaring harder at us and some of the Dauntless-born about to step in. Before he can grab my arm I throat chop him, grab his head and knee him in the face then push him into his minions.

"You forget I am not your girlfriend Peter and we barely even went out. So before your Candor smart mouth gets you into any more trouble, you better remember whose roof you stand on. Touch me again and I throw you off."

"Excuse me for fucking caring Zoe." He gasps and growls out.

I just shake my head and move away from him. I end up standing next to a young Dauntless-born guy and two girls. They smile at me and clap my back.

"Zoe is it? Nice going there. My names Uriah and this lovely lady is Marlene and that is Lynn." He smiles at me.

I raise my eyebrow at his not using any compliment for Lynn "Hello Uriah, Marvelous Marlene and Luscious Lynn." I say winking at Lynn who tosses her head back and laughs.

"Wow. A bad ass, gorgeous, non- stuck up Erudite! Now I have seen everything." Lynn laughs and I just shrug.

"Someone had to call Uriah's bad game out." Uriah chuckles.

"Did you really date a Candor? That Candor?" Marlene asks eyeing Peter who was rubbing his face.

I sigh looking back at him and he just winks at me and grins. Is he seriously not getting it?

"Good fucking gods! You would think he would take the hint from me basically almost killing any chance he has at offspring and a knee to the face. And yes we were technically 'boyfriend and girlfriend' within the confines of school. Not like we saw each outside of it except for when he followed me to a rave when I snuck out to go to one." I shrug.

"Oh so it was like a grade school boyfriend girlfriend thing? Well that isn't any fun." Marlene nudges me.

I shake my head but don't answer. I instead look up to the ledge and at who is there glaring at us and wish I had kept my eyes down. Eric Coulter, fuck. I forgot about him. That is one potential asshole I don't need to make an enemy out of. I just have to remember to show respect, don't show weakness and keep my temper in check.

I feel someone move close behind me and I know who it is. I close my eyes my nostrils flaring. "What is it Peter?" I grit out between clenched teeth and try to keep quiet.

"Don't get all sassy with me. I'm just trying to make sure you don't do anything stupid." He mutters leaning into me.

I roll my eyes and look upwards and put my hands together "Gods give me strength to NOT throw Hayes off the roof."

I hear chuckling around us.

"Enough!" Eric's voice booms around us and I look up to him. I snap my mouth closed and try to take on an air of listening and respect. It must not really work because he still looks pissed.

"Everyone listen up. My name is Eric and I'm one of your leaders. If you want to be in Dauntless, you'll jump."

I instantly feel hands grip my waist and pull me back. I snarl but know I can't break out into the fight I want to. Instead I try and get Peter's hands off of me. What the fuck is his deal?

I hear people around me ask what is down there and other stupid questions. As I am struggling against Peter I snap out loud instead of in my thoughts. "Does it fucking matter what is down there for Christ's sake!"

A hush comes over the group and I see Uriah along with the girls looking at me with wide eyes. I sigh at my own impatience and letting my temper get to me.

"Didn't mean to say that out loud but it doesn't make it any less true. You jump or you don't, simple as that. We are all here for a reason and it sure as hell isn't to sit around braiding hair and singing songs about love and peace. You choose Dauntless. What the fuck did you expect? So as the saying goes, put up or shut up."

I can't even help what is coming out of my mouth but all this meekness is just pissing me off. I sigh at my lack of control but I can't think beyond my rage at Peter manhandling me.

"Christ Zoe why can't you..."

"She didn't ask you Candor did she? I'm inclined to join her in thinking throwing you off the roof would be a good thing." Eric jumps off the ledge and the few people around the two of us move out of the way.

I feel Peter pull me closer to him and I finally get a grip on his fingers. I twist slightly making them bend back and I quickly step forward towards Eric who tilts his head at me quirking an eyebrow.

"Sorry I spoke out of turn Sir. I will completely volunteer to be your first patsy or will fully comply with any other punishments you feel necessary for disrespecting a superior." I'm practically begging him to let me jump and get away from Peter. I also am being completely honest about the punishment since my lapse of control was completely out of line.

"Zoe..."

"Candor, I won't warn you again." Eric says coldly.

I notice he looks different than the last time I saw him at Erudite. He had let his hair grow out on the sides and changed the top parts style a bit. In a way he is stunning and I feel my breath quicken slightly as his gaze rakes over me. He motions with his hand in an 'after you' gesture.

"Thank gods" I sigh in relief and too low for anyone to hear. I run up to the ledge, jump up quickly, spin around and wink at the Dauntless-born. As well as Eric who happens to be standing right there. Then throw myself back and yell in delight as the wind rushes past me.

I land in a net and sigh in disappointment. "Dammit! That was disappointing!" I mutter loudly. I feel the net tilt and a hand reaches out to grab me and help me out.

I look into the dark blue eyes of someone I know all too well. But he doesn't know me thank god. He has gotten taller and tanner since I last saw him though.

"Disappointing?" He asks in amusement.

"I half thought the fall would end in a pool of icy cold water. Or that it would be one of those falls in the movie where you keep on going for what feels like forever. Then it turns out you were just above the ground the whole time, held up by a wind turbine or something." I shrug either would have actually been cool. "You know like conquering a fear, like the fear of the unknown. Would have been cool." I smile at him

"Interesting. Might have to suggest those for next time." He said with a straight face but humor in his voice. "Name?"

"Zoe."

"First Jumper, Zoe." He takes my hand and holds it up and I hear cheers and laughs. He shows me where I am going to stand and I meet a Dauntless girl named Lauren. We joked about my proposal for alternatives to land in and talked about Dauntless type stuff.

"If you want, after lunch I can take you to get some clothes and show you around a bit." She smiled at me.

"Sounds good. You can help me de-snob in appearance." I chuckled. Uriah, Marlena and Lynn had joined me first. Christina and Beatrice (now going by Tris) came after.

"Wow. The way you put Peter in his place was epic! Eric almost threw him off the roof when he kept making comments." Christina laughed as she came up to me.

"Too bad he didn't." I sighed "He can be a dick but he isn't all bad. I just wish we weren't in the same initiation class together."

Uriah scoffed shaking his head. "From what I have seen of him he has no good points."

"Yeah well, I guess we all change." I shrug and look down. He could be sweet when he wanted to be. There would always be that part of me that loved the first boy I had ever kissed. I still had the fond memories of us out in the small garden courtyard of the school and him holding me close. We could have been more had he not started to act like the kingpin of Candor along with his friends. But now I don't date bullies or abusers, or assholes. Really I just don't date.

Lauren looks at me questioningly. "Someone I should look out for you?"

"Nah, I can handle it. He just thinks he was put on this earth as god's present to me." I smile and roll my eyes.

"Speak of the devil." Lynn mutters and I sigh. Surprisingly he doesn't try and come near me and hangs back waiting for his friends I suppose. He still stares at me and mouths 'later'.

Finally everyone is down and the guy that helped everyone off of the net calls everyone's attention.

"Alright everyone listen up. My name is Four."

I hear Christina snort beside me and I stiffen. Why did no one know not to fuck with people in authority especially here? "Four, as in the number four?" She asks laughing and looking at me. I just shake my head and sigh.

Four looks at me briefly and walks up to her smirking. "Exactly like the number four."

She laughs again. "What, was one through three taken?" I have to clench my fists from yelling at her to shut her trap.

"What is your name initiate?" Four's voice is cold and his eyes are hard and she finally seems to get the memo that she is messing with the wrong person.

"Christina." She almost squeaks out.

"Well Christina, the first thing you are going to learn from me is to keep your smart mouth shut if you don't want to end up hurt. Got it?" She nods. "Good, now Dauntless-born you will be going with Lauren, transfers stay here with me."

My new dauntless-born friends hug me quickly and tell me to find them at lunch. Lauren throws a glare at Peter then hugs me too "Sit at my table at lunch and we can go from there, ok?"

I smile and nod and face Four who is looking at me strangely. I frown and shift uncomfortably and look down then sigh when Peter again moves up.

I don't speak or look at him I just keep my head down and my fists clenched. I seriously don't understand what is going on with him right now.

"Like I was saying earlier, my name is Four and I will be one of your instructors along with Eric. Most of the time I work in Intel but for initiation and training I will be with you guys. We are going to be taking a tour of the facility. I want you all to follow me and keep your mouths shut and stick close." Four leads us away.

I walk close to Christina and Tris with Peter following right behind us. We are close to the back of the group and Christina looks up at me since she is shorter and then frowns. I sigh knowing what she is frowning about.

"You want to know why I was shaking my head at you when you were trying to crack wise? It's because that was not exactly the smartest thing to do. We are low on the totem pole here and he obviously has some rank. We're expected to be soldiers, Chris. We can't back talk or argue with them. That shit doesn't fly and your smart mouth could get us all in trouble if the mood strikes them."

"So? We can say what's on our minds it's a free faction. And how would talking back get YOU in trouble if I am the one that does it?" She snaps.

I stop and look at her incredulously. We're both unaware that Eric has stopped and is leaning against a wall listening to us argue. "Are you shitting me? How about because we'll all be held accountable for each other. You talking back may get us all laps or worse. Look, I am prepared to accept laps, extra shit, whippings, hell even death for standing up for what is right. But I'm not about to step into that just because you can't hold your tongue when needed Chris. You aren't Candor anymore. That went out the door when you spilled your blood on the coals. Yes you can be honest and yes you can joke around when it is called for. But you can't just open your mouth and say anything because you think you have the freedom to. You can take my advice or not. Call me a bitch or not but it's true." I shrug and walk on not caring if she had anything else to say.

I see Tris smiling at me as she catches up. I give her a sad smile and listen to Four as we head into The Pit. I look around and smile taking it all in.

"Beautiful isn't?" I ask Tris as she smiles and nods.

"I used to go to these raves, hosted by Dauntless and Amity of all things, they were pretty freaking epic. I always wondered what the dancing would be like here in the compound. There's something freeing about letting your primal instincts take over. Whether in combat or in dance, it's all just one heartbeat to the next." I smiled looking around. Four had caught some of what we said and tilted his head then frowned then walked on.

"I didn't think Erudite liked to party." Chris said.

"I wouldn't know." I muttered.

"What do you mean? You were an Erudite so how could you not know?" She asked annoyed.

"Apparently I wasn't a very good one. No sweat off my back though." I shrug and a blonde Erudite boy named Will looked at me.

"Don't let her fool you. She was top of her class. I heard you speak several languages." He tilted his head.

I don't answer just keep on walking. Let him think all he wants. Only Edward really knows for sure.

"Do you?" He asked pressing the matter. Okay since he won't let it go I will give him a little sample.

I smiled and replied cheekily. "Demandez-vous si je parle en langues ou tout simplement ce que je peux faire avec ma langue?" His eyes go wide and I laugh.

"You can speak another language! You speak French? What did that mean?" He asks in awe.

I let a wicked grin cross my face and I know my eyes are glinting in mischievousness. "I said; are you asking if I speak in tongues or just what I can do with my tongue?" His eyes go even wider and he turns red in the face.

I burst into laughter. I snort once and then snort again because I snorted in the first place. I bend over trying to catch my breath and stop laughing.

"You need help initiate? Should I take you to the infirmary?" I hear a deep voice ask dryly.

I raise up under control now still smiling wide, my dimples are probably showing. "No sir. Sorry for bothering you." I turn to catch up with the others. The cowards had left me. Although Peter was stopped at The Chasm waiting for me frowning and then turning around walking when he saw Eric beside me.

"Did I say you were bothering me?" Eric falls into step with me.

"No Sir you did not." I reply simply.

"What's his deal?" Eric indicates with his head to Peter.

I frown as I look to Peter's back. "I don't know. We 'dated'," I use air quotes for the dated part "in school but never did anything or went anywhere. He would basically hang out up there with me. He followed me to a few places I went to outside of school but he wanted something I didn't and he cheated. He demanded a relationship from me and then betrayed me. End of story." I shrug looking uncomfortable.

"He obviously doesn't think it was the end. How long ago was that?"

"We haven't been together for more than a year. I saw him at school still but that was it. I am not sure why he thinks he has a right to tell me what to do or put his hands on me. Maybe he thinks because we knew each other there it will pick up here." I roll my eyes at that.

"Would you have thrown him?" Why was Eric so interested or talking to me? I thought since he got here he communicated in a series of grunts and rude gestures.

"Honestly? Yes I would have." I grin and look him and get serious. "I need to apologize for my lack restraint and respect on the roof. It wasn't my place to call out the idiots up there and I'm sorry." I say firmly and never breaking eye contact with him.

I see something flash across his eyes, respect maybe? He tilts his head looking at me and smirks. "I can forgive you for your loss of control this time. Now back to your Candor boyfriend." I growl at that and he chuckles but continues. "You won't mind being paired with him to fight when it comes up?"

"Why would I? I won't learn unless I fight and I wouldn't mind getting in a few hits on him." I smile in truth now and rock back and forth on my feet in anticipation of sparring.

I do end up catching up with the others and walk into the dorm. I take a bed close the bathroom area and on the bottom bunk in a corner. Tris takes the top bunk, Chris takes the bottom next to me and Will the top one.

A candor named Al takes the one after that and Drew (Minion#1) takes the top bunk on his. Peter gets the bottom bunk across from me and Molly (Minion #2) takes the top on his.

I see there are clothes for us to change into. There are a few work out outfits and a couple of casual. I pull out a sports bra, tank top, leggings, and sneakers. I start to whip everything off to get it over with quickly. I don't really care if anyone sees my body since we will all be sleeping in here and the bathrooms are all open. Tris is having issues so I rip off my blanket from my bunk and tie it between two top bunks so she has a curtain. I hear her muffled 'thanks'.

"Yep." I say and pop the p at the end.

I look over and see Peter just staring at me open mouthed and Molly glaring at me. I notice something move and Eric has walked in front of Peter, blocking his view of me.

I forgot Peter had only ever seen me in a bathing suit. I know I had changed over the last few years. I kicked up my fitness and lost what little baby fat I had still had. My boobs had never gotten bigger but my ass had. I was more toned and tanned.

I looked at my stomach and grinned at my bruises. That had been a fun night and I note to find Edward soon.

I finish getting changed on my side of the blanket. I take my braid down and let my wavy red hair free and blow the bangs of out my face annoyed with them.

"Remind me to never rebel and cut my own hair again. Fucking bangs are annoying." I yell out loud and hear Chris and Tris laugh. I look around and realize I am the only girl ready until Tris calls done. I take down the blanket and make up my bed all military style again.

I turn to Will with a playful smile. "Got a coin I can use?"

He looks at me confused and I roll my eyes. "You know so you can check the bed is so tight you can...oh fuckin never mind." I wave him away.

I hear a familiar laugh and the muttered. "I can hear your cursing all the way over here Zoe!"

I see a person that I know well. "Edward!" I yell and run over to him and launch myself at him tackling him to the ground.

He winces as we make contact. "Shit Zoe! I still have bruises from the other night!" but he smiles at me.

"Oops. Sorry." I jump up and help him up.

"Everyone take your old faction clothes to burn with you and meet in the dining hall after." Eric stands over us to announce. "Well you two looked comfy." He muttered through a clenched jaw looking at us.

"Sorry Sir. We knew each other from before. Where is Mayra, Edward?" I looked around for his girlfriend.

He frowned and shook his head. "She went Amity. I couldn't ask her to come here because of me. And no matter how much we tried to help her with the fighting she just couldn't do it."

"Oh Edward, I'm sorry. I knew she would have a hard time. She just loves you." I pulled him into a hug.

"It's fine. We go where we have to go. At least we still have each other right?" He hugged me back.

"Right! Like I told when we were ten, friends till the end. Come on," I say and link his arm with mine "let's go burn some shit, eat some shit, ink some shit and then hit some shit. In that order!" I wink at him with a smile.

He gives a mock salute and we grab our old clothes and walk out laughing. I pass Eric on the way. He still looks at me with head tilted and void of emotion.

"So I saw your favorite stalker hovering near you since you got on the train." Edwards comments as we dump our clothes and walk off without another look.

"Not sure what the deal with that was. He is the one that cheated but he is acting like..." I threw my hands up in the air flabbergasted at what is going on.

"I told you he wasn't over you. He may have given in and fucked someone but you're the one he wanted for anything else."

"Well then tough titty." I exclaimed loudly and we got some looks and laughs.

We find the dining hall and grab two trays. We each start grabbing foods the other likes and look around. I am waved over by Lauren and my three new friends. We take a seat with me beside Lauren and Edward on my other side facing the doors and Uri, Marlena and Lynn.

"Edward, this is the Ubiquitous Uri, the Marvelous Mar and the Luscious Lipped Lynn. Guys this is Edward the Excellent. Of course you know Lady Lauren, she being a lady of the realm and all." I waved my fork around during the introductions.

Uri frowns at me. "The Ubi what what?"

"What What in the butt butt?" I say trying to confuse him more.

I hear something being spit out and look at the guy next to him as he laughs. "Did you just say the what what in the butt butt?"

I smile trying to keep my laughter in at his and the others faces. "Roger that."

"Wow, I am going to use that. I am so stealing that." He laughed and I realize he must be related to Uri.

I wink at him. "Well, I'll give you the family discount and it'll only cost you the royalty of buying me my first Dauntless rum and coke. Sound equitable?"

"Indubitably." He nods and shakes my hand as we all laugh. "Names Zeke by the way. Guess you already figured I claim this mongrel," He grips Uri in a headlock "as family. Brother actually."

"It did cross my mind yes. How do you carry on with that burden, sir?"

"Ha ha, so funny you two. Now seriously, what the shit did that ubi thing mean?"

"Ubiquitous means to be always present or around. You know like nagging presences you just can quite get rid of." I grin at him.

"Don't mind her you get used to her humor. Except for when she goes all surly from lack of coffee in the morning. That you never get used to it." Edward smiles as he and I start passing food back and forth to each other.

"Are ya'll a couple?" Lynn says watching us.

We look at each other and laugh "No, not hardly. We were same faction but we started to work out and spar together about 7-8 years ago?" I gasp in mock horror. "Why Edward! I do believe we have an anniversary coming up!" I clutch my heart in shock.

"My dear lady how un-gallant of me. Forsooth it be true. Shall I ply my lady with piercings and tattoos to celebrate?" He replies merrily.

I fan myself. "You do know the way to a woman's heart, Good Knight." We both crack up laughing as he wraps his arms around me and hugs me. Losing Myra is hard on him and he needs the reassurance of my closeness.

"You guys are funny!" Mar grins at us.

Edward brings me in close to his side and kisses my forehead. "Speaking of that nagging presence, guess who just walked in." He said to me, still holding me, as I groan.

"Well at least he won't be sitting here at this table." I roll my eyes. Thanking the fact that all the seats are taken.

"What's his deal with her?" Lauren asked Edward watching Peter as he went through the line. Peter's eyes drifted to me and frowned when he saw Edward's arm around my side.

"He's an ass that couldn't recognize the greatest thing he would ever get. That anyone will ever have, by having her, and thought with his dick instead." Edward growled and I shoved a carrot stick in his mouth.

I laughed as he grimaced at the carrot and pulled away before I could shove more into his mouth. "Hey! I eat my shit you eat yours!" He laughed.

"So Zoe, are Lauren and I taking you and Edward to get all Dauntless looking tonight?" Zeke asked.

"That was the plan."

The dining hall goes quiet as Eric enters and apparently quiets down from intimidation. I can see Eric smirk at the reaction and I look down at my plate as I cut into my steak shaking my head and grinning.

I look at the table and frown when I can't find what I am looking for. I look over at the line of food and see what I need to make the steak perfect.

"Be right back. Leave my pudding alone Edward!"

"Where is she going." I hear Lynn yell. I see Edward replying but I am already dashing up to the line.

"Excuse me, forgot the most important nutrient." I smile at the lady as I reach for the Tabasco sauce at the same time as another hand does. Said hand is attached to Eric who is smirking at me

"I believe I was in line first Zoe" He quirked an eyebrow at me. He knows my name? I almost panic but realize he used my nickname.

I grin at him. "Sorry, my bad. My steak won't be the same without it but the blood flavor should be enough." I go to turn back and I feel a tap on my shoulder. Even such a simple touch sends shivers of warmth through me. What the fuck is all this about?

"Take it and then pass it to my table after." He puts the bottle in my hands and turns around.

"Thank you Sir."

"Don't mention it" He grins and passes me to his table.

I follow a little bemused and sit back down. Noticing he is sitting right behind me next to a guy just as big as he is but with black hair spiked a bit in front where the short bangs would be.

"Got your ass burner?" Edward asks laughing.

"Yep, now I can eat in the way God meant for us to eat." I grinned and doused my steak and pudding.

"Eww did you just put hot sauce on your chocolate pudding?" Uri shrieked and I laughed as Edward shook his head.

"Sweet and spicy. Never done that before?" I ask looking around at the disgusted looks from everyone. "Don't know what you're missing." I turn around and tap Eric on his shoulder.

He turns around nods at me and takes the bottle from me. "Any good?" he asks me pointing to my pudding.

I shrug and grin. "If you like to walk on the wild side." He grins and turns back to his friends and I turn back to my food.

I take my first bite and hum in pleasure and moan. "Mmmm. Fuck that is good! So fuckin glad to get perfectly cooked steak."

"Cooked! It's still bleeding." Lauren shouts.

"Exactly! Still mooing. Perfect temperature."

"What?" Lynn laughs.

"What what in the butt butt." I wink at her and laugh. I hear the table behind me start laughing at something.

"Dammit! I forgot I was stealing that from you!"

"As long as you remember my royalty will be due. One rum and coke for each use of said phrase."

"How about a trade instead of buying you drinks every time?" Zeke asked.

I take a bite of carrot stick and wave at him regally. "The court will hear your presentation."

He snickers "I'll take you zip-lining."

I blow a raspberry. "Boring! Been there done that. Like at least twice a week." I shrug.

He frowns at me. "How do you get up to the top?"

"Elevator."

"How? I disable the generators when we leave."

"What like hot wiring an engine is hard? Or do you mean the spark plugs you take when you leave. Because I figured that shit out first thing. Never mess with a girl that can fully take apart and reassemble engines."

Uri puts his head on his hand propped up on the table "Marry me Zoe? Please just marry me right now."

Lynn frowns "No way I get dibs on her."

Edward scowls looking at me. "Didn't I give you a paper ring when we were nine? I think that makes you mine before anyone else's." He side hugs me and I laugh.

"Yes you gave me and every girl in the class one for valentine's day. But I traded mine in for a baseball glove. I think that voids that out." I shrug and we all laugh.

"Tell you what Zeke." I take a drink of my soda after a mouthful of pudding and moaning in pleasure.

I hear growling behind me, then laughing and someone muttering "fucking hot" but keep on talking.

"Tell you what Zeke. I have the materials to do something known as bungee jumping. I will kindly allow you to arrange an outing for said activity for the use of...ummm three uses of my phrase."

The others look confused and Edward is shaking his head "Don't look at me, she found out what it was and started dragging me off to do it."

"But what is it?" Lauren asks.

"You take this long 'bungee cord' and secure it to the top of the bridge out at the Amity fishing farms. The other end you secure to your ankle and you leap off. You get to the end of the cord and it snaps into place jerking you back up and then you fall again. I have been trying to perfect the release on the snap the second time and then diving in the water." I wink and eat some more steak and I see Uri and Zeke smiling really big at me.

"So freaking a deal!" Zeke shakes on it.

"Good. One thing I failed to mention though" I grin wickedly at him.

"Oh shit that is one wicked grin." Uri gulps and Edward nods.

"It usually means trouble." Edward mutters and I elbow him with a small frown.

"It's not that bad this time. What I forgot to mention as part of payment, I will require a bottle of scotch or whiskey too. I can't jump into freezing ass water without proper protection."

"You just want more whiskey Zoe." Edward scoffs.

"You say that like it is a bad thing?" I say offended and holding my heart.

"It was a bad thing when you decided we should do drunken sparring three nights ago. I swear my ribs are black you beat the shit out of me so bad."

"You shouldn't have lost the coin toss and had to take the shots. Not my fault I have better aim."

"It's when you spent all your time in the live round labs firing off any kind of gun they brought in. I had to attend classes unlike some spoiled princess'."

"You Edward are a poor sport and need to move on from the neuro-stim in the dick incident."

I heard of intakes of breath from our table and the one behind us. "Damn! That had to hurt!" A voice behind us yelled.

I looked behind us to see Eric looking over his shoulder at me and smirking so I wink at him. He blushes before he turns back.

"Hmm, me thinks there be an audience Edward the Excellent."

"You know I hate that rhyme shit because I can't think of anything for your nickname. And I got the neuro dart in the dick for using your real name." He growled.

"I give you a single use."

"Fine! Tenacious Trinity."

"Trinity?" I raise my eyebrow at Uri.

"I said he could use it one time not you. I do know about a certain event that comes up soon. I am not opposed to a little friendly fire."

He flinches and I laugh with a shrug.

"I don't care for the name. It was given to me for a shit reason by an even shittier person. Don't ask and I do mean that." I say a firmly and Uri nods.

Edward brings me in for a hug. "Don't look now but Peter is making his way over again."

"Zoe...can we..."

"Go away Peter." I growl.

"We need to talk Zoe." He demands trying to pull me out of my seat. I hear a bench scrape back and suddenly hands grip Peter. It was the guy sitting with Eric and Eric was standing beside him scowling at Peter. Eric really is handsome. Even more so when he smiles.

"I believe she said go away initiate." The unknown guy says as he grabs Peter by the throat but not squeezing too much. He is as big as Eric and has the same leader tattoos on his arms but larger gauges in his ears. "Are you going to listen this time?" He demanded and I saw the entire dining hall looking our way.

I looked over at the initiate table and saw Four frowning at the whole scene and Tris mouth the words 'are you ok'.

I take a chance and see if she knows it but I sign back in sign language that 'I am fine'. I see her look shocked and smile. She replies back 'talk later'.

I see Eric glancing at me and my hands. I test it out and look him in the eye 'sorry, thank you'. He nods. So besides me and Edward; Tris and Eric know sign language. Cool!

Peter nods and the guy lets him go. Peter looks at me one more time with hurt in his eyes and makes his way out followed by his goons. I look down at the table a little guilty. It is better this way anyways.

"I told you he is still hung up on you Zoe." Edward shrugged.

"Then he needs to get over it. He made his choice when he picked getting his dick wet over a relationship. And HE was the one that insisted we be in a relationship. I didn't set that shit on him. He gave ME the ultimatum. How is it I am the one at fault for just upholding what he begged for in the first place?" I see Eric looking at me with that now familiar head tilt and his eyes aren't cold but sort of soft.

"Don't look at me. I told him he was stupid and that you weren't a normal girl."

The guy looked at my arm. "Let me see." He stood me up.

"Huh. Guess that was from the roof and just now." I saw bruises on my wrists and arms. I shrugged "Thanks for that. The bruises will be fine. I have worse on my stomach from this guy's kicks to it." I pointed to Edward who smirked at getting a few shots at me the other night.

"Drunken sparring huh? Names Logan by the way. Another of your leaders." He shook my hand then made us all scoot down so he and Eric sat down. Eric sits across from me as I take a bite of my steak and chewed happily, closing my eyes and humming then swallowing.

"Yeah I guess for us it was like Candor or Dauntless. We got a bottle of," I motioned with my fork and knife in air "whatever it was. Probably the cheap shit whisky. We pour a couple of shots take a coin and try to make the coin in the shot glass. If you make it the other person has to drink theirs and yours and if not you do the same. Once the shot has been done you spar, we used to spar until 5 minutes elapsed. Then we went to first blood. Then we changed it to last standing."

"Who was left standing your last time?" Eric asked.

Me and Edward shared a look and grinned "First round was me, second was Edward. The last time we knocked each other out. Double KO!" I make a uppercut motion. "Woke up in the gym the next morning hungover as shit and still wearing our sparring gear and everything. His girlfriend at the time made sure we wouldn't drown in our own vomit I guess. Covered us and left us there to sleep." I laughed and Logan grinned.

Zeke and Lauren were staring at Eric as if he was a leper. But Zeke spoke up. "How did you guys learn to fight?"

"Reading at first. When I was ten I dragged Edward to the archives and pulled out a bunch of martial arts movies to watch. Bruce Lee, I was obsessed with him."

"Was?" Edward snorts and I shove a carrot in his mouth and he spits it out.

"Told you about your prey food. Keep it to yourself." He takes a drink and I laugh.

"Nutrients necessary for your eyes EDWARD! Besides it helps to keep my ass from getting any wider than it already is." I stick my tongue out at him.

He winks "I didn't hear the guys on the roof complaining when they said that they would 'tap that'."

"Hmm, well if they are anything like Peter they wouldn't know what to do with that."

"Hey! I resemble that remark." Uriah says grinning.

I look at Eric who is frowning. I shrug and finish answering the question.

"Anyways we both learned mostly from movies, books, vid files. Finally I was taught by someone to defend myself and then I taught Edward." I shrugged and Edward rubbed my back and smiled sadly.

"Will be interesting to see you guys fight then." Eric was scowling at Edward.

I nod with a grin. "We look forward to them."

Uri spoke up finally. "You guys don't mind that you will have to fight each other?"

We shake our heads. But my forehead is scrunched up in a frown. "No. Why would we? We know there will be no hard feelings and if he even thinks about going easy on me I will be pissed. Same for him. It isn't like we haven't ended up bloody and with broken bones before. I mean I don't care to have broken bones but they are a necessary evil. You learn from every match you have and every match you watch." I shrug and take my last bite of steak.

"Speaking of some things Edward. What item are we on for our agenda? There was burn some shit, eat some shit."

"Ink some shit and hit some shit are last. But we did say we wanted to get more gear so we won't have to keep wearing stinky clothes." He said.

"Sounds good. You and Lauren still want to be our guides? I might even let you go all girly on me Lauren and convince me to buy something besides work out gear and pants. But no really tall heels. Don't give me weapons you don't intend me to use." I share a knowing look with Edward who pales.

Lauren smirks "Do I even want to know?"

"At a rave some guy thought he could get what I wasn't offering and I disagreed, violently." I took a drink with a frown. Edward nodded with a frown and pained look. "The horror, the horror." I joked to Edward.

"I love you Zoe. But even I have nightmares about that and I knew he had it coming after trying to..."

I elbowed him to stop him from saying anymore. "The girls don't need to hear that part Edward." I say softly looking at Marlena and Lynn.

I chance a glance at Eric and he is smiling at me with a hint of something, pride maybe? I don't know. My entire interactions with the leader have been confusing in the extreme. I expected to be on edge with him at the least but I just felt like he was 'one of the guys' at some points and the others I still haven't figured out.

"Oh yeah..sorry."

"Ready to roll?" Zeke stands up and I smile.

Lauren grabs my hand. "Girl stuff first, clothes then salon." I pale and look a bit panicked.

Edward chuckles and hugs me. "I'll meet you at the tattoo parlor if not before. Then we can go hit up the skate ramp if you want."

"Please! Need next adrenaline fix." And send a pleading look their way to help me and Eric grins at me. I am surrounded by all the girls and drug along.

We are in the store and I have loaded up on training gear; 3 pairs of capri leggings, 3 regular leggings, 3 legging shorts, 3 cargo pants for weapons or night exercises. 5 black tanks, 5 grey tanks, 5 v neck short sleeve black shirts, 5 v neck short sleeve black, 2 black long sleeved v neck shirts. 1 dark grey sleeveless vest with weapon pockets, one black of the same and then one grey and one black leather long sleeved jackets. I grab two pairs of sneakers and 2 combat boots. 6 sports bras and a bunch of underwear in a mix of black and grey.

I grab a backless burgundy backless midriff top, one in black, 3 pairs of black jeans and 2 leather pants. I also pick a backless straight necked black dress that came to just above the knees, a turquoise one of the same kind as the black and two pairs of low heel shoes in teal and burgundy. Lauren also grabbed me a pair of knee high boots and makeup. Lauren also made me get a bunch of underwear and bras that were not for working out since that was all I picked up. I was made to try on the dresses and I figured out that Lynn was for sure into girls when she salivated at the site of me. It made me feel kind of good.

"I have to say Zoe." Marlene comes up and has me do a twirl to look at me. I look at the backless part of the dress and making sure my ass isn't too big in it. "I am not normally into girls but I would so attack you right now if we were alone." I blush and smile then run a hand over my hips.

"I swear I think this makes my ass look as wide as The Pit." I frown.

"You look fucking hot Zoe. God damn that makes me hot seeing you." Lynn walks over to lean on the wall.

"Are you guys fucking with me? Cause I don't know girl speak for fucking with someone. I am really bad at the girl shit guys." I frown and Lauren comes and hugs me.

"You are officially my new little 'sis. I would never let someone do that to you. You look beautiful and I am scared to take you to the club in that, seriously. We are going to have fights on our hands." She smiled at me as Lynn and Mar nodded along.

I smile back "Well then I will just have to pick up a few garters to strap knives to." We all laugh at that. "Is there anywhere to get some good shampoos and stuff?" And with that we were headed to the commissary.

I browsed and found my favorite type of shampoo and conditioner of a mint smell, then got my eucalyptus and mint body wash, hair removal crème, hair bands, first aid kit, shoe polish and brush, and then some powdered aspirin. I was happy about all finding soaps that didn't smell like flowers or something overpowering. The kind I liked made me felt like I had just walked outside during a cool spring rain. It was soothing and refreshing and something I knew I would need during the coming weeks.

On the way to the dorm I saw some skateboards and had to get one and a music player and headphones.

Lauren and the girls had taken off to drop off their purchase so I took my stuff on my own dorm. I pulled up my locker and unlocked it, sat on the ground and then started to organize everything. One side was for workout clothes with my next day's outfit laid on top, but also organized each day's outfits even down to the under things and socks. The other side was fancy underwear underneath, fancy clothing and last casual clothes on top. Everything else was stacked and set up for ease of use and being able to grab quickly. I had put my toiletries in a black and teal leather bag made for them so I could just grab that quickly.

"I don't think I've ever seen an initiate's locker so organized before." I looked up to see Eric crouched down near my locker looking over my skateboard.

I smile at him. "Well that must be frustrating to handle. Do they know where they are? I mean locker inspections and all that?"

He snorts, rolling his eyes. "Apparently not." He picks up my shoe shining kit and quirks and eyebrow at me.

"What? You guys don't do inspections of gear?" I frown at him.

"If I thought they wouldn't completely fail at it I would push for it. Bad enough I can barely get them to understand simple instructions." He rolls his eyes again and puts the shoe kit back in.

I finish organizing and then close the lid and lock it, grabbing the board and standing. He stands smoothly in one motion and I can't help but admire how much he fits into Dauntless now.

He always stood out in Erudite and not always in a good way since he was ostracized because of it. If I had a type though it would be Eric. The sudden realization almost leaves me breathless.

"Zeke said Lauren sent you here and I thought I would show you were the parlor is." He commented with nonchalance.

"Thanks" I nod and put my board down and push off maneuvering it around the beds and into the hallway. The corridor gets to bumpy so I get off and pop it into the air and catch it.

"These roads need to be repaired." I shrug at him and he chuckles.

"They aren't really made for skateboarding."

"Or human passage." I mutter as my ankle catches on a dip and he reaches out to catch me.

"Just don't run down them in the dark and you get to know them after a while." He laughs.

"They might cause issues on drunken sparring night, you realize this don't you."

"Initiates aren't supposed to be drinking anyways." He sighs and I realize he still has a hold of me. We both look down and step away from each other.

"Not even when a member is present to keep an eye on us?" I ask hopefully.

"Not really, but it isn't like it doesn't get ignored anyways." He growls.

"Ok, I promise no excessive drunkenness from me. A few rums and cokes barely faze me." I shrug.

"How about just no double ko's and almost drowning in your own vomit. I am all about pushing limits but..." He trails off shaking his head.

I laugh at that. "It was mostly to rebel, but… nah...I can't even pretend." I roll my eyes. "Don't want to lie and you would call me on it."

"Damn straight." He laughs and I shake my head.

"What are you thinking about getting done as far as a tattoo?" He asks quietly as we pass a few members. "Please don't tell me some shit like birds. Or roses." He shudders and I laugh then try to blow my bangs of my eyes.

He reaches over and moves them out of the way and smiles at me. "No, nothing like that. Edward and I had talked about getting matched ones but that was when his girl was going to be here too. I think it would be too weird and people would assume..."

"That you're together. Yeah I have to admit I had thought the same when I saw you two." His voice was quiet.

"Nope I think we have too much dirt on each other. Has to be some mystery right? Besides we bathed naked together as kids, you can't come back from that" I grin.

"If you say so." He mutters.

"Have you ever seen the ancient Polynesian tribal art? I want something in that style. That means strength, protector and fresh starts." I say quietly trying to move on from the awkwardness that suddenly occurred.

"You had a bad start?" He quirked an eyebrow at me.

"We all have our demons." I whisper.

"I could do you." He looked at me seriously. I quirked an eyebrow and went red.

"Do me?" I grin as I blush and look away.

"Your tattoo that you want. I learned how to do tattoos and have some equipment. I have drawn a few, my own included." He pushed my shoulder playfully and chuckled.

"That would be good. If you don't mind where I am getting it done." I turn red again.

He clears his throat. "If you are uncomfortable.."

My eyebrow shoots up at him. "Have you seen the bathroom and sleeping quarters? If I was I would have to get over it quickly. It isn't likely any of the guys are going to go out of their way to not look."

"They should." He growled.

"Shoulda, coulda, woulda. Sorry, I need to stop being a smart mouth. I made myself that promise that I would curtail that here." I frown.

"I haven't said anything. You'll know when I don't appreciate it." He smirks and I nod.

"Kind of hard not to pick up on that. But you have to be how you are. Lives are on the line and all."

"I don't necessarily like being a complete asshole." I snort and he looks over to me smirking causing me to grin. "Ok I like it. Just not with certain people." I have to swallow a bit because his look is saying certain people include me. "I heard what you said to that Candor girl. While we do try not to target everyone unfairly because of one person's actions it can happen. I would never whip you though." He said firmly.

He looked at me and I nodded. "I'm expecting lots of laps in my future though. It's inevitable with the lack of common sense in this group." I grin and he laughs.

"Maybe so." We get into the Pit area and make our way up to the parlor and when we get around more people and he adopts his asshole demeanor.

"I would like it if you helped me with it, the tattoo. And I draw too so maybe two heads would be better than one?" I shrug.

"You draw? You have any sketches?" He asked quietly and I shake my head a bit sadly.

"I had what was on my back. 'I once had strings but now I'm free'..." he stopped me with a hand on my waist and pushed me into a corner. It was darker here and there was less traffic. My back hit the wall and I looked up at him as he moves closer to me.

"What does that mean? Because all day you've said things and I have to wonder why you are saying them. How could you know some of the things you say? Things I think myself. If I didn't know better I would think you were reading my mind." He had his jaw clenched.

Has he been listening to me all day? Why? I try to think back to if I said anything interesting. I don't think so as is was just me with an old friend and making new ones.

"I say them because they are either true or I have experience with them. Sometimes, though rarely, it is to diffuse a situation. What thing specifically are you referring to?" I had a feeling what it was and I hate that she had done that to him. Forget sins of the father, mine were of the maternal kind.

"The puppet strings." He frowned "Why do you even know that quote?"

"We all have demons, Eric, even Pinocchio." I reply softly.

I feel his hand on my waist pulling me closer and tracing the outline of my leggings underneath the tank and jacket. My breath quickens a bit and my eyes are drawn to his lips briefly before I look into his eyes and it is like looking into The Chasm. Beautiful, wild, dangerous and dark. I can't look any longer because if I do I will be pulled under and I have a mission here. And it is one that includes saving even the confusing youngest leader.

I forgot about the pain I must be showing for a moment and then I shook my head. "I should go." I clear my throat. "Could you tell the others I just wasn't up to it? I'm just going to..." I turned around and walked as quickly as I could.

I needed to hit the punching bag and hard. I needed to do that so I wouldn't be pulled under by my thoughts and feelings that swamped me.

I didn't have tape or gloves but I could hit the gear store up. So I ran into the shop grabbed up my size of gloves, shin pads, towel and water bottle then picked up tape and a mouth guard just in case. The guy gave me a weird look and I swiped my credits card but he said it was all covered still. I thanked him and started to put on the gloves before I was even out of there and trying to hold it and the board was tricky. I am sure I got looks as I cursed pretty colorfully and dodged around people to get to the training room we were shown earlier.

I made it into the training room and realized I needed to take off my jacket. I growled and ripped off the glove I already had on and ripped of the jacket then. Pulled off the boots and threw everything on the ground and flopped down.

"Gods damn tape. Go to your home! Your home is my hands! Oh just screw it. I'll go without." I pull on the slightly padded gloves and tied my hair back then pulled my tank top over my head thankful I did put on a sports bra.

I get up and start bouncing up and down on my feet and rolling my shoulders. Once I have warmed up a bit I make my way over to the bag and start with jabs and uppercuts. Then I work in my kicks; windmill kicks, roundhouses, butterfly, jab jab jab, kicks again.

There really is a beauty to losing yourself in the movements of combat. Everything else just fades away and it has always been my best therapy. It soothes me and takes me away from my troubles and past.

I am just Zoe here, not Trinity Salvador; bastard of Amar Salvador and Jeanine Matthews. I could forget what Jeanine had done to my father and what she tried to do to me. Her hatred of what he was stemmed from his refusal to leave Dauntless. She could try and tell herself she believed all that shit she spouted about dangers to the system but she and I both knew it was just that, complete shit.

"Why are you in here Zoe? Lights out is soon."

"Fuck it all Peter just leave me alone already." I growled and continued to hit the bag and kick even harder now that he is near.

"Look, whatever it is you are going to exhaust yourself before tomorrow. Just come to the dorm and get a shower and come to bed." He tried to plead with me.

"Come to bed? You are un-fucking believable Peter. You think because I am here," roundhouse kick, upper cut, upper cut "and you're here that I am going to" windmill and butterfly kick, 1,2 punch "jump in bed with you?" I leap up into the air and do one last spin kick.

"I didn't before and I for damn sure won't now. My first time is not going to be with the likes of you Hayes. You had your chance and you blew it. You demanded we be in a relationship first. You set the rules but you didn't want to play by them." I pant out and go to my water bottle.

"I fucked up and I let you go. I know this Zoe." He walked towards me hands up. "I saw a chance to get some and thought you would never find out. I thought you wouldn't really even care and that if I just got it out of the way I could wait like I wanted us too."

"What were you even thinking Peter? What guy demands to wait until they get married? You demanded that Peter, not me. I was fine with taking it to that next step. Thank fuck I didn't though. Because at least when you broke my heart I didn't have to look back on that." I picked up my shit and started to walk away.

"I want to be with you Zoe. I want to try again." He sounded pained.

I stopped as I closed my eyes and sighed. "It's too late Peter. I loved you once but not anymore. We are two different people now Peter. You're better off not getting close to me anyways. People end up dead when they do." I reply bitterly.

"Zoe..."

For the second night I walked away from a confrontation with my past.

In the control room of the compound two men were gathered around a screen.

"I'm telling you Max that is her. That is Amar's daughter. As soon as she came off the net I knew." Four pointed to the training room on the monitor in front of him. Max and Four stood watching Zoe Salvador as she stopped before walking out of the training room.

"We are two different people now Peter. You're better off not getting close to me anyways. People end up dead when they do." Drifted to them from the screen.

Max sighs wearily. "What did that woman do to her? Just watch out for her and help where you can. We can't draw to much attention to who she is though. I don't want any unnecessary people to know."

"And this Peter guy or Eric? They both have shown interest in her. You saw Eric at lunch and how he was looking for her at dinner." He frowned.

"I don't think we need to worry about Peter but watch out for him anyways. Eric..." Max sighs shaking his head. "As long as he doesn't find out she is Jeanine's daughter he shouldn't be an issue. It is only his hate of Jeanine that might cause him to harm her."

Four nodded but he wasn't convinced. Max patted his shoulder and walked out of the control room. Four was the only one that saw Eric step out of the shadows in the training room and frown in the direction that Zoe, followed closely by Peter, had walked down.

"I couldn't save you Amar, but I can make sure Zoe stays safe." He clenches his jaw as he makes his promise.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Not another Eric story you scream. Well to bad, he haunts me until I fill his coffers with more fan girls and guys. He is a greedy bastard. I am going to attempt a darker Eric and a darker OC and story. I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter. As always I love reads and reviews. I will be resuming work on Hardlines and Catching Silver after this weekend and when my parents head back home from a week long visit. Maybe that was what inspired darkness….parents. Just kidding (sorta kinda maybe). Hope enjoy the next bit**

 **Also this is an edit that I am finally getting around to doing. No big changes but hope you enjoy.**

 **Chapter 2**

 _Zoe_

I made my way to the dorm to shower and change and realized I had forgotten to eat but shrugged and made my way to my locker and bed. Tris looked down at me from my bottom bunk and frowned but didn't say anything. I appreciated that more than I could say and resolved to help her out how I could. They were cutting this year and she needed to make it. Her parents being who they were would make her a target as well as the fact that she had a secret. I made it my business to know who was being targeted. I couldn't do my job unless I did. I would have to think about what I could do to help her for stage 2.

Edward followed me over to my bed and sat down on it. "You ok?" he asked softly and glared at Peter as he walked in and over to his bed.

"Peachy, just needed to blow off some steam. I am going to jump in the shower really quick." He nods and lays on my bed to wait for me.

I open my locker and start to pull out everything I would need. When I open the locker though I find a note, a large folded sketch paper and a box of food with some fruit, a sandwich, some tabasco sauce, and a piece of chocolate cake. I frown and open the note.

'You didn't make dinner. Make sure to eat. Don't get piercings until after fights. Here is a sketch I made, offer still stands. E'

I feel my stomach do a small flip but internally cuss myself out. I open the sketch it is a pretty big paper. He has drawn the figure of a woman's collarbone and above the chest area along the swell of the breast, the back and hips. The pattern is the Samoan tribal tattoo swirls and patterns.

The colors are black and faded black melding into each other. Within the tribal swirls and lines are faint images. I make out the dauntless symbol and some of the manifestos scattered throughout the entire design. I examine it closely and realize it isn't just the Dauntless manifestos but also the Erudite ones and then there are also the other faction's symbol which is the most surprising, especially coming from him.

It would take a very keen eye to even make them out they are hidden so well and are almost made to look as if they are watermarks. Faint and only visible from certain angles. There are also symbols for strength, beauty, change and love all through the tattoo. It would only be on one collar bone, well actually just below it to follow the curve from the breast swell and up onto the shoulder. But the hips and back would have broken swirls of it.

Each one moved along my natural curvature and where it would be. On the back part that goes up into the neck from across both shoulders are the words 'Faction before blood. My faction is my blood'. On the hip part on one side are the words 'It's all one heartbeat to the next' and finally on the other hip is 'I once had strings but now am free'.

My heart catches at how he has put in all of the things I could ever want to put in but really starts beating when I see the words of my father at his death. He was there so he knows it from that but why would he put it in the tattoo if he did not recognize or remember me? Either way I love the entire design. It would look both feminine and strong. The only addition I could make is a flower, a lotus one actually.

I put the drawing back carefully and left the food in the locker for the moment. Then I grabbed my toiletries, night clothes and new underwear. I put my gear in neatly and strapped my skateboard to the top of the locker to hold it in place.

I went to the shower and couldn't help but sigh when Peter stepped in and took one beside me too. I quickly toweled off, dressed and brushed out my hair. I braided it still wet so hopefully it would be manageable when I woke up. I put everything up where it needed to go and grabbed my music player and headphones. Lastly I grabbed the box of food and went to my bed.

"Feel better?" Edward asked still lying on my bed.

"I don't know. Peter said he wanted me back and I don't want him like that but.." I shrugged but didn't finish. I stretched out beside him in my bunk and opened the box.

"But you love him and care for him. Only he won't understand you just want to be friends?" He finished for me and I nodded.

Edward watches as Peter walks by to his bunk opposite me in his towel.

Peter gets to his bunk and drops the towel and gets dressed right there, staring at me the whole time. I had already looked into the box when I saw him come out in the towel but I meet his eyes and I am sure he saw the pain in my eyes. I felt drained.

"Wow, he really is trying hard isn't he?" Edward asked worriedly.

I sprinkle a little hot sauce on my sandwich and the rest on my cake. Edward takes some fruit and frowns in the box.

"Eric got that didn't he?" He asked very softly.

"Yeah, don't know why though. Maybe he just wants to make sure I won't die on our first day." I can't help the smile that comes to my face or the flutter in my stomach at Eric's actions.

"Maybe. Lauren said she has never seen him smile before besides with his best friend and never ever at an initiate. Just be careful if something does develop with him. I don't want to see you hurt again." He frowned at me.

"Nothing is going to develop. He is a leader and I am an initiate. Also I don't date and you know that. I am certainly not going to do it during the most important four weeks of our lives." I sigh wishing that it wasn't all so complicated. I just don't want to feel anything for Eric when he would probably just end up hating me because of my mother.

I eat some cake and a little bit more of the sandwich. "I can't eat anymore. It all just tastes like sawdust right now. I am going to throw this away."

I get up and make my way to throw the box away and I see Eric in the doorway. He tilts his head at me and gives a small smile then blushes. I realize I am in a tank and underwear only. I smile at him and for a moment I am rooted to the spot just looking into the abyss of his eyes. I shake myself out of it.

I sign "Goodnight and thanks" and walk to my bed.

"Lights out remember training tomorrow at 8am. Be ready to work" He calls and looks at me one more time as I crawl over Edward into my bed. I am sitting against the headboard and fiddling with my music player.

"You want to sleep here tonight Edward?" I smile over at him sadly.

"I miss her." He frowns.

The lights go out and when I look back Eric is gone. I sigh and lean into Edward. "I know you do. I do too. Stay here and maybe it will make us both feel better."

He nods then we scoot down and crawl under the scratchy covers and blanket. The bed isn't really that big and we have to maneuver a bit.

"This isn't going to work." He growls. "Switch sides, I will get against the wall and lay on my side. It will free up more room."

"Fine, but you get up before I have to feel your morning wood." I grouch.

"Zoe!" He yells and I giggle. "Brat." I can hear his smile and he wraps his arms around me. I feel him hug me close and inhale after we get settled again. "You smell good, you always smell good." He mumbles and I smile a bit.

I yawn and look at my watch then set the alarm "6:00?" I ask.

"If you want your coffee you better."

"Ok, night Edward."

"Night Zoe"

I fall asleep to the newly downloaded music that is programmed into my music file and the rising and falling of Edward's chest behind me. When I dream though, it is of the haunting abyss of steel grey and blue eyes and a hand on my waist.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

 _ERIC_

I knew the moment I saw her that there was something familiar about her. I saw the streak of blue and flash of red hair. She landed and would have been ok had it not been for the grinning Candor boy that purposely landed on top of her.

I saw him lying on top of her and was pissed. Mainly because I didn't want to have to deal with some fucking couple in training. There was also something else that pissed me off about it that I pushed down immediately, calling myself ridiculous.

"Son of a bitch! You did that shit on purpose!" Then I heard the unmistakable sound of something being hit hard enough to take the wind out of a man and the baritone out of his voice. I would have almost chuckled if I didn't feel his pain a little bit.

"Fucking hell Zoe. You didn't have to rack me."

"You're lucky I didn't fucking do worse to you Peter!" Well at least one initiate had some spirit and maybe even some skill? Stranger things had happened. Then there was the fact that they obviously aren't a couple and that pleased me for some reason.

I got a better look at Zoe. She had multi-colored red hair. Never settling on one shade as the sun and shadows play out in it. It was coming out of her long braid, like it wouldn't be contained any more than she would. I couldn't make the color out completely but her eyes looked to be a beautiful blue color with flecks of deeper blues and ice blue.

She wasn't bad on the eyes at all with her tan skin and firm body. She didn't have a lot in the tit area a good handful but that wasn't a big deal to me to be honest. She had some nice curves with an almost hour glass figure. Whatever she did in Erudite she at least kept fit.

She made her way closer to the front and I saw that same Candor guy shove his friends away and go after her. I tensed thinking there might be a fight but he just went back to trying to get her to stay by him.

"Get fucking back here Zoe. Don't go up there with them." The punk said sneering at the Dauntless-born around. I turned to glare at him. Fucking punk. I am minutes away from just tossing him over the ledge as our first jumper until the girl jerks away from him and anger flashes on her face. She straightens out her hand and throat chops him the grabs his head and knees him in the face and pushes back to his friends. Inside I am feeling smug as shit and even proud of her.

"You forget I am not your girlfriend Peter, we barely even went out. So before your Candor smart mouth gets you into any more trouble, you better remember whose roof you stand on. Touch me again and I will throw you off." She yells at him and I so want to applaud her right there. I can see some of the Dauntless-born appraise her as worthwhile.

"Excuse me for fucking caring Zoe." He growls out as he shoves his chick friend away from him as she tries to examine his lip.

She moves away again and the Dauntless-born smile and clap her back. She pulls up even with Uriah Pedrad and his two friends Marlene and Lynn. They introduce themselves as well all wait for the others to get off the train.

"Zoe is it? Nice going there. My name Uriah, this lovely lady is Marlene and that is Lynn." Uriah smiles that cheesy Pedrad smile. Not even registering he just insulted one of his friends. But Zoe picks up on it right away. With her raised eyebrow she calls him on it.

"Hello Uriah, Marvelous Marlene and Luscious Lynn." And winks at Lynn who checks out her ass after throwing back her head and laughing. Well I guess that answers what way that girl swings.

"Wow! A bad ass, gorgeous, none stuck up Erudite! Now I have seen everything." I inwardly agree she is nothing like the Erudite I knew.

"Someone had to call Uriah's bad game out." Even Uriah smiled about that.

"Did you really date a Candor? That Candor?" I think we all are looking at the punk and trying to figure that out. How does an Erudite even get with a Candor?

The guy just didn't know when to stop and he was still winking at her. "Good fucking gods. You would think he would take the hint from me basically almost killing any chance he has at offspring and a knee to the face. And yes we were technically "boyfriend and girlfriend" within the confines of school. Not like we saw each outside of it except for this one rave I snuck out to go to and he followed me to it."

I take a moment to process that. He definitely needed to stop. He just looked desperate by now. The fact that it wasn't even real dating doesn't even need a second thought and that was just even sadder. The fact that this girl likes raves is pretty cool. Very unlike an Erudite.

"Oh so it was like a grade school boyfriend girlfriend thing? Well that isn't any fun." No shit Sherlock probably why he isn't a current boyfriend.

I see her register I am there and recognize me. Not many remember me from Erudite so this merits watching. She doesn't show fear though, doesn't show contempt or anger either. I see a bit of respect and trying to distance herself from the trouble asshole was causing.

"What is it Peter." She growls at him through a clenched jaw.

"Don't get all sassy with me. I am just trying to make sure you don't do anything stupid." Gods I am fucking tired of this punk. Let me just get this shit over with and get on with our day.

"Gods give me strength to NOT throw Hayes off the roof." She says with raised hands and eyes to the sky and I think you and me both baby.

Everyone laughs at that though.

"Enough! Everyone listen up. My name is Eric and I am one of your leaders. If you want to be in Dauntless, you will jump."

The punk grabs her waist and pulls her back into him and is looking around him giving off a possessive glare. Keep it cool, keep it cool. Not your business, even if the sight of his hands on her is making me feel like I need to rip him in half.

I half listen and answer to questions about what is down there but I am watching her face and body language. She wants to hit him but won't because she doesn't want to seem disrespectful. Interesting.

Then I hear her lose impatience in general and snap out at all the bullshit questions. "Does it fucking matter what is down there for Christ's sake!"

I tilt my head trying to figure her out and am not paying much attention to everyone else.

She sighs and looks around then changes her tune back to respectful but with still impatience for stupidity. Or maybe that is just how I feel and am projecting.

"Didn't mean to say that out loud but it doesn't make it any less true. You jump or you don't, simple as that. We are all here for a reason and it sure as hell isn't to sit around braiding hair and singing songs about love and peace. You choose Dauntless. What the fuck did you expect? So as the saying goes, put up or shut up."

Inwardly I gulp and I already know. I know I am going to have to watch myself because she has caught my attention and she has just become the biggest mystery I never wanted to solve.

Fuck! Logan is not going to let this slide if he even gets a hint that she has caught my eye. Who the fuck is this girl? Why does she seem so familiar and why do I feel so fucking guilty looking at her?

"Christ Zoe why can't you..."

Ok, I have had enough. Who the fuck does he think he is?

"She didn't ask you Candor did she? I am inclined to join her in thinking throwing you off the roof would be a good thing." I jump off the ledge to follow up on that. Then I see her break free and run towards me? Well now that is a fucking new one. No one runs to me only from me.

"Sorry I spoke out of turn Sir. I will completely volunteer to be your first patsy or will fully comply with any other punishments you feel necessary for disrespecting a superior."

I like her attitude and sass even when she is being respectful. Her eyes are mesmerizing as she begs with them. What would they look like begging me for something else? Maybe I will come up with a punishment for her, something that puts us together alone? I tilt my head and look her up and down and start to smirk until the shit glares at me like I am taking his girl.

"Zoe..."

"Candor, I won't warn you again." I stare him down and motioned her forward so I can cut the punk off from going near her again.

I hear her sigh in relief. "Thank gods"

Then she runs to the ledge and leaps up spinning around before she is even all the way up. I can't even help it I grin at her as she winks and then throws herself back yelling and laughing.

I shake my head as I hear her muttered "Dammit" when she reaches the bottom. Candor steps up and I put my hand out.

"No you don't get to go next Candor. You go when I say you go, dead last." I sneer at him.

He still didn't learn to keep his mouth shut when he started making comments about that stiff that defected. I didn't give a shit about how she felt, just that he opened his mouth one more time and he shouldn't have.

Finally it is just us two. "You need to watch yourself Candor. We don't put up with bullshit, bullying or backtalk. Got it?" I got in his face.

"Yes." He glared at me back. Fucking punk. Let's see how you like me come fighting time.

"Yes what?" I let my voice and eyes become the menacing voice of the killer I could be and he cowers back a bit at that.

"Yes sir."

"Get the fuck out of here." I wave my hand in dismissal and when he jumps I go down the stairs and slip in at the back of the group.

I already missed most of what was going on with Four and the group. I take notice and am pleased that Zoe hasn't been bothered again. When we start the tour I hang back like I always do. I am bored but this is where I have to be for right now.

Apparently there was some sort of issue with the Candor girl Zoe is walking with given their conversation.

"You want to know why I was shaking my head at you when you were trying to crack wise. It's because it was not exactly the smartest thing to do. We are low on the totem pole hear and he obviously has some rank. We are expected to be soldiers Chris. We can't back talk or argue with them. That shit doesn't fly and your smart mouth could get us all in trouble if the mood strikes them."

"So? We can say what is on our minds it is a free faction. And how would talking back get YOU in trouble if I am the one that does it?" The little candor bitch snaps out. Why did it always happen with Candor's? Did honesty cause common sense to just disappear?

Zoe stops and looks at her like she crazy, not that I blame her.

"Are you shitting me? How about because we will all be held accountable for each other. You talking back may get us all laps or worse. Look, I am prepared to accept laps, extra shit, whippings, hell even death for standing up for what is right. But I am not about to step into that just because you can't hold your tongue when needed Chris. You aren't Candor anymore. That went out the door when you spilled your blood on the coals. Yes, you can be honest and yes you can joke around when it is called for. But you can't just open your mouth and say anything because you think you have the freedom to. You can take my advice or not. Call me a bitch or not, but it is true."

She is right about all of that. What she expects to be whipped for I don't know, that is an old punishment and only used in the rarest of occasions. Not that I wouldn't hesitate to use that if needed, just not on her. And death? What did she expect to have to do here? I frown when that last thought occurs and there is the damn guilt again. Why is she causing these things to go on in my mind for fucks sake? I see her smile sadly at the Stiff but then they both smile when we reach the Pit.

"Beautiful isn't?" Zoe asks in an almost sigh looking around and I move closer to hear.

The stiff nods with a smile.

"I used to go to these raves hosted by Dauntless and Amity of all things, they were pretty freaking epic. I always wondered what the dancing would be like here in the compound. There is something freeing about letting your primal instincts take over. Whether in combat or in dance, it's all just one heartbeat to the next."

I gulped a bit at that scowling from the feelings this girls was causing in me. I never looked at it that way. And she is right it feels good to let instinct take over during combat or fist fighting. To let the rhythm take over your body and give yourself over when dancing.

'It is all just one heartbeat to the next'. It is the life's blood of the faction and I completely get what she is expressing. I run a hand through my hair and think about the last rave I had been to. Wonder if she was there somewhere lost in the crowd. Wonder if we ever danced close not caring who we were dancing with.

I am so lost in thought I miss what the conversation turns to but I pick up on the next bit.

"Don't let her fool you. She was top of her class. I heard you speak several languages." The blonde Erudite says. And she just walks on a knowing smile on her lips. She has a small dimple right at the edge of her mouth.

"Do you?" If she wanted to tell you she would, I want to rage at the nose.

"Demandez-vous si je parle en langues ou tout simplement ce que je peux faire avec ma langue?" Wow! Well that just got me hard. Not only was her fucking accent perfect but she just made a super suggestive joke. I want to laugh at the look blonde erudite transfer has.

"You can speak another language! You speak French? What did that mean?" He asks in awe and is probably just as turned on as I am right now. He can just fucking forget that right now though.

Ah hell that look on her face is shiver inducing. Such wicked intelligence and slyness. I have a feeling that seeing it when she is plotting something far less innocuous it will be shiver inducing for a totally different reason.

"I said Are you asking if I speak in tongues or just what I can do with my tongue?" The blond boy's get wide and it is no less hard on inducing to hear her say those same words in English.

She started laughing so hard she snorts and then snorts again. It is adorable and sexy. I can't get over the image of what she can do with her tongue though, inspired by her words. I was always a sucker for French. Too bad no one I hooked up with here was smart enough to understand basic English much less French.

She laughs so hard bent over she doesn't notice me approaching or the others taking off.

"You need help initiate? Should I take you to the infirmary?" I can't help but start a conversation with her now that she is alone.

Candor waits for her at the Chasm and I catch up to her.

"No sir, sorry for bothering you" I finally get someone to automatically show me real respect and not fear and it is the last fucking thing I want from them. Fucking figures.

"Did I say you were bothering me?" I ask her wanting to get a real conversation going.

"No sir you did not." Throw me a bone here Zoe. Fine I will ask about numb nuts. Who is looking back at her with longing still.

"What's his deal?" I point to him wit my head.

She frowns shaking her head. "I don't know. We 'dated'" She uses air quotes for the dated part, "in school but never did anything or went anywhere. He would basically hang out up there with me. He followed me to a few places I went to outside of school but he wanted something I didn't and he cheated. He demanded a relationship from me and then betrayed me. End of story."

How could have anyone cheated on her? Who would be that crazy, especially when the guy is still hung up on her? And is she telling the truth about her not having insisted on a relationship? I hope she doesn't turn out to be one of those loose girls. I would hate for her to degrade herself like that. Hypocritical of me sense that is the only type of girl I ever had encounters with.

"He obviously doesn't think it was the end. How long ago was that?" What is going on with me? I am getting pissed about something that isn't even my damn business.

"We haven't been together for more than a year. I saw him at school still but that was it. I am not sure why he thinks he has a right to tell me what to do or put his hands on me. Maybe he thinks because we knew each other there it will pick up here." She must not see what I see, that boy is head over heels in love with her.

"Would you have thrown him?" I don't know why this is important to me but it is. I don't want her to see me as a dick because I would have thrown him. Or maybe I am already predicting that I am going to make the shit's life miserable.

"Honestly, yes I would have." She smiles at me in a genuine way that shows her dimples plainly, then her demeanor becomes serious and I tense up. I knew her openness and friendly demeanor couldn't last with me. So I prepare for her to realize she is talking to the most hated Dauntless member much less leader.

"I need to apologize for my lack restraint and respect on the roof. It wasn't my place to call out the idiots up there and I am sorry." An apology is not what I expected in the least. I am oddly pleased and proud of her very obvious ethics when it comes to knowing how we have to behave and hierarchy.

"I can forgive you for your loss of control this time. Now back to your Candor boyfriend. She growled at that making me chuckle. "You won't mind being paired with him to fight when it comes up?" Maybe I can offer to help train her. It would allow me time to study her more and I think I would enjoy getting her on the mat.

"Why would I mind? I won't learn unless I fight and I wouldn't mind getting in a few hits on him." She looks ready to go to the mat right now.

I don't answer because we reach the dorms. Four has already given his speech about the dorms and the bathrooms. I continue into the dorms and stand looking at the bathrooms and frown.

Were they always this fucking open? I watch as she finds a corner bunk closest to the bathrooms. I could see her calculating as she chose that set of bunks. It was the perfect distance from her bed and the showers, allowing for a shorter walk after taking a shower. It was also a good defensive position so to speak. Her back is protected by a wall and she has a perfect view of the entire dorm room and the entry doors.

I lean against the wall and watch who takes beds immediately around her. While I am glad she has the stiff above her and the candor chick beside her I want to growl when I see her lovesick candor take the bottom bunk directly in front of her.

When it comes time for the initiates to change I try not to look. I really do. She is just fucking stunning. She doesn't care that she is practically naked in front of the others and when the stiff looks uncomfortable and hesitant; she makes a curtain for the stiff but doesn't get behind it herself.

I control my breathing looking at her. I didn't do her justice in my appreciation of her earlier, not by half. Beauty wise her face itself is stunning. Thick lashes frame her mixture of cobalt and ice eyes. Full lips made for kissing but a bottom lip that is so enticing. She has a smattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks. She also has multicolored bruises on her stomach that leave me feeling rage boiling until I see her look at them and smile with pride. She got them in some way she is proud of and I know I have to find out how she got them.

I step in between the punk and her when the kid stands there looking at her in a way that makes me want to bash his head against the cold concrete ground. After she dresses she takes down the makeshift dressing curtain and makes her bed up military style.

"Got a coin I can use?" She asks the blonde erudite with that mischievousness in her eyes again.

I smile at the reference and have to roll my eyes at the obvious lack of knowledge from a supposed Erudite. Guess he couldn't be bothered to learn anything of importance of his faction of choice.

"You know so you can check the bed is so tight you can...oh fuckin never mind." She gives a dismissive wave and growls at him in annoyance.

"I can hear your cursing all the way over here Zoe!"

I watch as her face becomes completely animated in recognition and I stiffen at the obvious joy and affection that takes over her features.

"Edward!" She shouts the name of another Erudite transfer and runs to him. She jumps up and wraps her arms and legs around him as they both fall laughing to the ground. I feel my blood boil but what the fuck did I expect? A girl like her not to be taken?

"Shit Zoe! I still have bruises from the other night!" Whatever made him hurt apparently still has a smile on his face.

"Fucking great." I mutter and make my way to pass them on my way out.

"Oops. Sorry." She jumps up and holds out a hand to help him up and I just stand there looking at them. The boys look of complete adoration of her and I can't help but want to strangle him.

"Everyone take your old faction clothes to burn with you and meet in the dining hall after." I yell at everyone and even I can tell any cold emotionless tone I might have gone for failed. I can't help but comment on the couple. "Well you two looked comfy."

The two grin at each other but she shakes her head in a negative, denying that they are not obviously a couple.

"Sorry Sir. We knew each other from before. Where is Mayra, Edward?" She looks around frowning and I see the guys face fall. Maybe they aren't a couple; for now.

He frowned and shook his head. "She went Amity. I couldn't ask her to come here because of me. And no matter how much we tried to help her with the fighting she just couldn't do it."

"Oh Edward. I am sorry. I knew she would have a hard time. She just loves you." She pulls him into a hug and I move a just a bit. It is obviously a shared loss but I still want to listen.

"It is fine. We go where we have to go. At least we still have each other right?" He hugs her back tight and buries his head in her neck. I can feel my eyes narrow at him. She might not see him as a potential anything but he obviously may not see it the same.

"Right! Like I told you when we were ten, friends till the end. Come on." There is obviously a large bond and I sigh. That isn't something I can overcome and why do I even care?

"Let's go burn some shit, eat some shit, ink some shit and then hit some shit; In that order!" She winks at him and I can feel my head tilt at her choice of language and priorities.

Where was this girl when I was in Erudite? Why couldn't I have found someone like her when I was being ridiculed for not being the perfect erudite boy? How does a punk like him get to have a girl like her?

He gives a mock salute and they grab their clothes. They pass me and I school my features as she looks at me. She is still smiling but this time at me. My body moves on it's own and I watch as they toss their old clothes without even stopping to look at them burning or saying goodbye. They just move on as if they could care less, maybe they do. I know it was a gleeful experience for me to watch the blues turn to ash.

I don't follow them into the dining hall right away. Instead I lean against my favorite set of rocks in the pit and take out my tablet phone and check emails and messages. There is one from Jeanine but it is about the projection of fear serum needed for the next stage.

I roll my eyes and scoff at her attempt to put a foot in the door for that stage. We aren't going to give in to your demands anymore you evil bitch, I think. At this point leadership could give a shit less about her personal hunt for divergents. Not after what she did to Amar.

My old mentor and instructors image comes to mind and I feel a wave of grief threaten to drag me under. His blood isn't on my hands but I feel as if it is. I had informed Jeanine that I believed he was helping Divergents and she had practically foamed at the mouth when his name was mentioned. I didn't turn him over like she wanted, he had done that himself. I can remember the moment he had done it and every second of the horror I witnessed.

My eyes travel to the pathway to The Chasm. He had arranged for all of leadership and a few of senior members to be there and had arranged to turn himself to Jeanine personally with a few Erudite guards. He didn't turn himself in though. He proudly announced he was in fact Divergent.

That our society was being lied to about them being threats. They were not threats because of them not belonging to a faction. In fact he insisted it was quite the opposite. I wanted to scoff but I had always trusted him before and I chose to listen well to what he was saying. He told us all that he could have chosen three factions, Erudite being one of them. He and Jeanine had shared a look there and stayed silent for a time. Her eyes had flashed with murder and rage while his had been sorrowful.

The moment passed and he continued to say that he could have chosen any, but he stayed with Dauntless because he belonged here and only here. When a divergent makes a choice, he said, it is not an idle choice or one done a whim. It a choice made with conviction and dedication because they truly mean it.

"Faction before blood." He said looking at us, at me. His eyes softened a bit when he made eye contact with me. Like he was trying to tell me that this wasn't my fault. That I didn't just sign his death warrant by informing on him. I couldn't believe it then and I still can't. Then his gaze hardened as he looked at Jeanine again. "Faction before blood, but my faction is my blood. And here my blood will stay until my blood returns."

I heard a maniacal shriek from Jeanine but it was already too late. Amar had thrown himself into The Chasm. He chose to die for his faction to show just how wrong we all had been. Any real chance Jeanine had of convincing leadership to go along with her plans died with him that night. That night I had been redeemed and damned all at the same time.

I shake myself out of my dark thoughts and head in to get lunch and meet up with Logan. Who said he was apparently listening to the most amusing initiate he had ever heard and told me to get my ass in there now. I smiled because I had a feeling who the initiate was.

I enter the dining hall and as always it never fails to amuse me when it goes quiet as I walk in. Seriously, how is this the warrior faction when they are cowed by a look from me? Not that I am fucking complaining. I live for this shit and I use it to my advantage regularly.

I glance around the room and sure enough, Zoe is sitting in the table right in front of Logan. I see her look up at me then around at everyone and smirk briefly before looking back at her plate shaking her head. Of course she would see what everyone else doesn't. I am oddly really pleased I don't inspire the same reaction from her. I make my way to the line and pick up some lunch, sticking with a burger and fries. I do grab a slice of cake and head to grab some hot sauce and ketchup. When I am reaching for the last bottle a hand shoots out too.

"Excuse me, forgot the most important nutrient." drifts to my ears and I turn to see Zoe. Why am I not surprised. I can't help but smirk at her and raise an eyebrow.

"I believe I was in line first Zoe" The only reaction I get at first in her eyes is shock and then pleasure. She likes that I know her name and I sigh inwardly. Yep, Logan is not going to let me live this down at all.

She gives me that adorable fucking grin with the dimple at the corner of her mouth. "Sorry, my bad. My steak won't be the same without it but the blood flavor should be enough." Seriously where were you before now?

I want to pull her back to me but settle for tapping on her shoulder and handing over the bottle. Surprising myself for damn sure.

"Take it, and then pass it to my table after." I turn around to hide the smile I have on my face

"Thank you Sir."

"Don't mention it." I can't help it as I turn around my eyes are full of laughter and I smile. An actual smile and in public. Fucking Christ there goes my reputation.

I walk to the table and feel her following behind and I take my seat next to Logan who looks at me. "What was all that about?" He immediately sets on me.

"I don't know what you are talking about." I say blandly.

He starts to speak again but he stops when we hear Zoe come back to the table and he nudges me. "You gotta listen to them, fucking hilarious. And the girl; if I wasn't in love I would fucking be all over this girl."

"Got your ass burner?" Her Erudite friend asks laughing.

"Yep, now I can eat in the way God meant for us to eat." I can't help but grin and chuckle a little as I listen to her answer and Logan nods his head. 'Told you' he mouths.

I see he is hell bent on us eavesdropping the whole time and I don't mind. But it is going to be difficult for me to school my features.

"Eww, did you just put hot sauce on your chocolate pudding?" The youngest Pedrad almost girly shrieked at that. Even I had to wrinkle my nose and Logan smirked at me.

"Sweet and spicy. Never done that before?" She pauses and I guess the others are telling her no. "Don't know what you're missing." She mutters and I feel her tapping my shoulder. I swear I might as well not being wearing my black t shirt and vest. I turn around with a grin on my face and she hands me the bottle.

"Any good?" I ask before I can stop myself and point to her pudding. Somehow I know that wicked and wonderful gleam is coming before it appears.

"If you like to walk on the wild side." She grins and shrugs and it is the sexiest thing I have ever heard. I turn back to my food and Logan has a shit eating grin on his face.

"What was it you said this morning Eric?" He laughs, grin still in place.

"Fuck off." I say laughing and my ears are caught by an incredible sound, her moaning in pleasure.

"Mmmm. Fuck that is good! So fuckin glad to get perfectly cooked steak."

I have never been as jealous of a fucking piece of food as I am right now. I groan and Logan laughs more. Why are we listening in again?

"Cooked? It's still bleeding." Lauren shouts in disgust. Seriously why ruin good steak by burning it? I am so with her on that. I douse my burger, fries and without even fucking thinking, my cake.

"Are you serious Eric? Wow, well hand it over I gotta try it too." Logan smirks at me.

"Exactly! Still moo'ing. Perfect temperature." She sounds in heaven and amused all in one.

"See what I told you? You should have heard them earlier. She has a saying…" he trails off and gets happy when he hears one of the girls speaking and his eyes get full of anticipation.

"What?" Lynn laughs.

"What what in the butt butt." She laughs as she says it and I get uncomfortable under my nonexistent collar.

Logan and I break out into laughter drawing the stares of the others further down our table.

"Dammit! I forgot I was stealing that from you!" Zeke yelled.

"The saying you were going to tell me about?" I ask and take a bite of the cake. She is right, the spicy cuts through the sweet and definitely makes an impression. Sweet and spicy is my new favorite thing. Kind of like her. Wonder what licking this off her would be like.

"Dude." Logan says to me taking a bite of his own cake.

"I know. Where was this and her my whole life." I say without thinking and Logan claps his hands together in glee.

"This four weeks is going to be great." He trails off speaking and we eat while listening to our lunchtime entertainment.

"As long as you remember my royalty will be due. One rum and coke for each use of said phrase." She is so sassy. I wouldn't mind buying her a few drinks.

"How about a trade instead of buying you drinks every time?" Zeke asked.

"The court will hear your presentation." I grin and eat a few fries.

Zeke snickers and replies "I'll take you zip-lining."

"Boring! Been there done that. Like at least twice a week." She blows a raspberry and I frown. Apparently she has been doing a bunch of things an Erudite would not do.

"How do you get up to the top?" Ok Mr. Lack of common sense they are called stairs.

"Elevator." Or not…

"How? I disable the generators when we leave." Well that is interesting. I take a bite of my burger.

"What like hot wiring an engine is hard? Or do you mean the spark plugs you take when you leave? Cause I figured that shit out first thing. Never mess with a girl that can fully take apart and reassemble engines."

"Could she be any hotter?" I mutter and I see Logan agreeing.

"Marry me Zoe? Please just marry me right now." Join the growing line of her suitors shithead.

"No way, I get dibs on her." That has to be the chick that was checking her out on the roof. And she as well as the others can eat shit for all I care. I am already contemplating getting to know her better myself.

"Didn't I give you a paper ring when we were nine? I think that makes you mine before anyone else's." I fucking knew it! Her friend is so going to go after her.

"Yes you gave me and every girl in the class one for valentine's day. But I traded mine in for a baseball glove. I think that voids that out." I laugh at that and Logan is watching me closely. I shrug and continue eating.

"Tell you what Zeke." she moans again and I shift uncomfortable and trying not to get turned on. Logan laughs full belly style.

"Seriously who knew eating could be so fucking hot." I growl and mutter, and he smirks.

"Tell you what Zeke. I have the materials to do something known as bungee jumping. I will kindly allow you to arrange an outing for said activity for the use of...ummm three uses of my phrase."

"She has not? Who would she get the bungee cord from?" I look to Logan who shrugs.

"Don't look at me. She found out what it was and started dragging me off to do it." Her friend says resigned.

"But what is it." Lauren asks.

"You take this long 'bungee cord' and secure it to the top of the bridge out at the Amity fishing farms. The other end you secure to your ankle and you leap off. You get to the end of the cord and it snaps into place jerking you back up and then you fall again. I have been trying to perfect the release on the snap the second time and then diving in the water." I have to give her props, jumping off that bridge is still gutsy as hell even with the bungee cord.

"Want we should join?" Logan asks knowing what my answer is going to be. I love adrenaline stunts and if she has the shit to do it. I will be talking to Zeke to arrange this and soon.

"So freaking a deal!" Zeke exclaims.

"Yeah, we will be having a talk with Zeke" I agree.

"Good, one thing I failed to mention though."

"Uh oh…" I mutter when I hear that mischievousness again.

"Oh shit that is one wicked grin." Uri gulps and Edward nods. I pop a fry into my mouth and grin.

"You knew she was going to say something didn't you?" Logan nudges me and I shrug.

"It usually means trouble." Her friend mutters and I hear him wince.

"It's not that bad this time. What I forgot to mention as part of payment, I will require a bottle of scotch or whiskey too. I can't jump into freezing ass water without proper protection."

"Where were girls like this when I was an initiate?" He mumbles and I glare at him.

"Back off!" I growl in warning and he smiles at me knowing she is already under my skin.

"You just want more whiskey Zoe." Edward says.

"You say that like it is a bad thing?" I hear her say in a mock offended voice. She is so going to be trouble.

"It was a bad thing when you decided we should do drunken sparring three nights ago. I swear my ribs are black you beat the shit out of me so bad."

"Drunken sparring? Damn we have to get in on that." Logan eats more cake.

"We shouldn't be listening to their fucking conversation." I grumble.

"So don't, but I sure as hell am going to."

"You shouldn't have lost the coin toss and had to take the shots. Not my fault I have better aim." She quips back to him. Competitive too. I sigh and eat some more cake. I am already addicted to her way of eating it and listening to her.

"It is when you spent all your time in the live round labs firing off any kind of gun they brought in. I had to attend classes unlike some spoiled princess'."

"Maybe training will be interesting." I lift an eyebrow.

"You Edward are a poor sport and need to move on from the neuro-stim in the dick incident."

I almost choke on my food. Logan and I instinctively grab our crotches. Those bitches hurt no matter where they hit.

"Damn! That had to hurt!" Logan yells and I turn to look back at the table to see her looking back at me too. She winks at me and I fucking blush like a schoolboy and cause Logan to laugh when I turn back around.

"Hmm, me thinks there be an audience Edward the Excellent."

"You know I hate that rhyme shit because I can't think of anything for your nickname and I got the neuro dart in the dick for using your real name." Her friend growled out. What is her real name?

"I give you a single use." She says imperiously.

"Fine...Tenacious Trinity." I freeze. Why does that name sound familiar? I think I did know her from before but not sure how. Either way I love the name. Why doesn't she use it?

"Trinity?" Uri asks and I already know that she isn't going to like being asked about it.

"I said he could use it one time not you. I do know about a certain event that comes up soon. I am not opposed to a little friendly fire."

"She knows about capture? Might have to join you this year." Logan shrugs and I nod.

"I need to make sure she is on our team." I mumble. I better not let Four know I want her though cause he will take her just to spite me.

I hear her laugh and smile myself.

"I don't care for the name. It was given to me for a shit reason by an even shittier person. Don't ask and I do mean that." She has pain in her voice and I want to know why, there are so many things I want to know about her.

"Don't look now but Peter is making his way over again."

"This fucking punk better not put his hands on her again Logan. I swear to gods I will end him." My eyes turn stormy and Logan tenses looking back.

"Zoe...can we..."

"Go away Peter." She growls.

"We need to talk Zoe."

"Fuck it!" Logan mutters and we both get up. He is faster than me though and already has him by the throat. I see her absently rubbing her wrist where he grabbed and more bruises. Probably from earlier. I see that and start hoping Logan crushes his windpipe.

I look her over and notice her attention on me in an appraising way. I feel myself liking her checking me out.

"I believe she said go away initiate. Are you going to listen this time?" Logan demanded. I am still looking at Zoe when I see her using sign language 'I am fine' she signs to whoever she is talking to. She notices me and then signs to me 'sorry, thank you'. I nod but don't sign back. She grins and turns to look back at Logan and Peter.

After Peter nods he understands he heads out but not before looking back at her an expression of longing and hurt. She looks down at the table and frowns.I want to shake her telling her not to feel guilty about the little shit.

I see Logan watching her rub her wrist still and he turns red in anger. Milla had been beat up during initiation and he has never forgiven himself.

"I told you he is still hung up on you Zoe." Her friend shrugs. And I see her eyes lose the guilt and flash with anger.

"Then he needs to get over it. He made his choice when he picked getting his dick wet over a relationship. And HE was the one that insisted we be in a relationship. I didn't set that shit on him, he gave ME the ultimatum. How is it I am the one at fault for just upholding what he begged for in the first place?" I can only look at her in wonder. No girl I have ever known has not wanted commitment from me. Here is someone I would gladly think of it with and he had just tossed it away. His loss is my gain.

"Don't look at me. I told him he was stupid and that you weren't a normal girl." I can see her friend looking over her with affection and I want to slap him and hard.

"Let me see." Logan says after standing her up to take a look at the bruises.

"Huh, guess that was from the roof and just now. Thanks for that, the bruises will be fine. I have worse on my stomach from this guy's kicks to it." She shrugs it all off and her friend smirks at her in pride for something.

"Drunken sparring huh? Names Logan by the way another of your leaders." Well Logan didn't waste that opportunity to get us sat at her table and talking.

I take a spot where I can see her face and feel my breath quicken when she takes a bite and closes her eyes and sighs in pleasure before talking again. I see Lauren frowning at me and Zeke looking very uncomfortable. Fuck it I don't care. It's not against the rules to date an initiate but it isn't like I am just yet anyways.

"Yeah I guess for us it was like Candor or Dauntless. We got a bottle of," she uses her fork to motion in the air "whatever it was, probably the cheap shit whisky. We pour a couple of shots take a coin and try to make the coin in the shot glass. If you make it the other person has to drink theirs and yours and if not you do the same. Once the shot has been done you spar, we used to spar until 5 minutes elapsed. Then we went to first blood. Then we changed it to last standing."

"Who was left standing your last time?" I can't wait to see her fight.

"First round was me, second was Edward. The last time we knocked each other out. Double KO!"

She makes an uppercut motion grinning. "Woke up in the gym the next morning hungover as shit and still wearing our sparring gear and everything. His girlfriend at the time made sure we wouldn't drown in our own vomit I guess. Covered us and left us there to sleep." She laughs at the memory and I see Logan grin and looking at me knowingly as I glare at her friend and the looks he is giving her.

"How did you guys learn to fight?" Zeke asks.

"Reading at first. When I was ten I dragged Edward to the archives and pulled out a bunch of martial arts movies to watch. Bruce Lee, I was obsessed with him."

"Was?" Edward snorts out and she playfully shoves a carrot in his mouth and he spits it out.

"Told you about your prey food. Keep it to yourself." She laughs and as always it is genuine and lovely.

"Nutrients necessary for your eyes EDWARD! Besides it helps to keep my ass from getting any wider than it already is." Your ass is fucking fantastic, I think. I remember her in her underwear and almost feel my fingers itch to grab it. Logan reads my look plainly.

"I didn't hear the guys on the roof complaining when they said that they would 'tap that'." Her friend winks at her and I know he is telling the truth. I am going to have to work fast here.

"Hmm. Well if they are anything like Peter they wouldn't know what to do with that." I smirk at the burn.

"Hey! I resemble that remark." Starting with the youngest Pedrad, I think as I frown.

"Anyways we both learned mostly from movies, books, vid files. Finally I was taught by someone to defend myself and then I taught Edward." He rubs her back and smiles at her in a sad way, as if he knows she is feeling pain about something.

"Will be interesting to see you guys fight then." I say thinking out loud. I won't kick his ass but I might pair him with someone that will do it good for me. I scowl at his arm that slips around her waist.

"We look forward to them." She says and nods.

"You guys don't mind that you will have to fight each other?"Uri asks quietly. He must not like the fact he will have to fight a friend.

"No why would we? We know there will be no hard feelings and if he even thinks about going easy on me I will be pissed. Same for him. It isn't like we haven't ended up bloody and with broken bones before. I mean I don't care to have broken bones but they are a necessary evil. You learn from every match you have and every match you watch." They both agree on that but I don't like the thought of her having anything broken. Although I am pleased to know she will go full throttle and not try and take it easy on anyone. Then I would be pissed at her.

"Speaking of some things Edward. What item are we on for our agenda? There was burn some shit, eat some shit..."

"Ink some shit and hit some shit are last. But we did say we wanted to get more gear so we won't have to keep wearing stinky clothes." He said grinning.

"Sounds good. You and Lauren still want to be our guides? I might even let you go all girly on me Lauren and convince me to buy something besides work out gear and pants. But no really tall heels. Don't give me weapons you don't intend me to use." I sigh, there is a story there judging by her friends paling. Luckily Lauren asks for me.

Lauren smirks "Do I even want to know?"

"At a rave some guy thought he could get what I wasn't offering and I disagreed, violently." She takes a drink and I feel my fists clench at the thought of someone trying that with her. "The horror, the horror." She turns to her friend joking to break the tension.

"I love you Zoe. But even I have nightmares about that and I knew he had it coming after trying to..."

She elbows him hard and looks at Lynn and Marlene. She obviously doesn't want them to have to hear that so it must have been really bad. Logan looks at me and I nod. He is thinking the same thing. I have a feeling his next stop is to investigate Zoe. I hope I can talk him out of it. I don't know why I just feel it is better not being done.

"The girls don't need to hear that part Edward" She says softly and I can't help but look at her with a growing affection that I feel.

"Oh yeah..sorry."

"Ready to roll?" Zeke stands up and she smiles at him.

Lauren grabs her hand and her look of panic is priceless.

"Girl stuff first, clothes then salon."

"I'll meet you at the tattoo parlor if not before. Then we can go hit up the skate ramp if you want." Her friend says in amusement. She pales and looks panicked at the thought of doing the dreaded girl shopping trip. Her friend hugs her and I watch as she sends me a pleading look as she is dragged away.

"Please. Need next adrenaline fix."

She is going to be fun.

Logan and I watch her go and Zeke turns back to us looking over me appraisingly. "Should I warn Uri off now or later?" He asks softly so Edward and his brother can't hear.

I don't answer but let my eyes do the talking. Logan decides to answer "Now, if you know what is good for him. Was she right about the spark plugs on the generator engine?"

"Dead right, and about the hot wiring if I am thinking about it now. I have the only key so that would be the only way to start it." He turns to Edward "Does she really know how to take apart and put an engine back together?"

Edward smirks with pride "Want to hear a funny story?"

How we all ended up walking to the pit together I don't know. But we did and gathered around a cluster of rocks as Edward started telling his story.

"She was always a rebel in Erudite. Her…." He stops and clears his throat as if searching for a word "...parents loved her to death but she was a handful. Fucking smart as hell too. Anyways, we were 13 and a leader had ticked her off so bad she decided she was going to get even by pulling a prank on that person. She didn't even hesitate when she came up with it. Mayra and I get roped into it right away. So first she hacked into the security systems and fed an image of the previous night and had Mayra set up on her laptop in a tree acting as a lookout. She also gave her a system that she personally setup to bypass certain areas we needed to access but also execute complex commands with one button. It kept Mayra safe but she still felt useful. Otherwise she had the means to use her tablet phone with all the same programming."

"How was this not noticed? I mean they do sweeps.." I started to ask but he shook his head interrupting me.

"I'm telling you she is scary smart. She never let anyone know just how smart she was because that would be giving away a tactical advantage. At eight she was already thinking like a Dauntless."

If she was that smart and that dauntless she is probably on Jeanine's radar. I bite my lip in thought thinking about stage 2. We don't report results to her anymore but I am still nervous about it.

"Anyways she helped the guy that made those systems set them up. Henry was not smart enough to do it on his own." I snorted at that, yeah he was pretty useless. I had thought his security system was a lucky shot. Now I know why.

I see Logan calculating again. His mind was always looking for ways to eliminate Erudite influence and how beholden we are to them for their technology.

"So what was the prank." Zeke asked smiling.

"We snuck into the Erudite vehicle garage where she located the leader's car and took it apart completely. Front end to back end, it all got taken apart. Then she had borrowed a repulsor lift that allowed us to carry all of the weight and snuck into a very secure lab. I won't say which because I honestly don't know. I just know nobody was supposed to know about this lab."

I feel myself pale because if it is the one I am thinking about then she could have been killed right there. Not even fucking joking but shot in the head that second and for what, a prank?

"Anyways, we get in and she assembles it back completely. Turns on the engine to make sure it is running and then programs the music player. It would only play a singer named Billy Idol and the only song was 'Rebel Yell'. It has been her theme song ever since. We got the hell out of there and went zip lining to work off some of the extra energy we had. Whatever that place was it made a big statement. They increased their security and other procedures. I think she did it on purpose because she looked really fucking pleased when they asked Henry to upgrade everything, I knew she had probably wrote the code for that entire upgrade program. I didn't ask though. Plausible deniability is always best when it comes to Zoe and her schemes." He finishes with a laugh.

I laughed but inside I am kind of freaking out. Who was Zoe really and why would she want to mess with Jeanine?

We make our way up to the shops and I break off from the others and find my way to the stores the girls were likely to be at. I am rewarded with a glimpse of Zoe trying on dresses and my breath catches. I catch snippets of what is being said and I hate to hear that she doubts how freaking amazing she looks. I walk away and make my way to The Chasm to think.

I need to ask myself what it is I want here. I am a pig when it comes to women and I am not ashamed of it. I get what I want and I move on.

Zoe is not going to be the kind of girl that will settle for that and she doesn't deserve it. She didn't seem to mind not having to commit to get physical so maybe we could work something out. I just needed to figure it out and fast. I felt like I was working against some kind of clock and this was too important to drag my feet on.

I realize it must be time for Zoe to meet up with the others so I go to find them. Lauren had said Zoe went to put everything up in her dorm, she was alone and Peter came to mind. So I said I would make sure she was told where to go.

When I get to the dorm she is on the floor with her locker open and is so absorbed she doesn't hear me come in or crouch beside her. She is organizing her locker and is completely focused.

I just sit there watching her as she puts her workout gear in order by day. One outfit per day right on top of each other. I try not to blush or look too much at her sexy as hell underthings. I look over her bath stuff as she organizes it and I am sort of surprised it is so tame smelling. Now that I think about it though, I thought I caught a whiff of the freshness of mint and spring morning rains when she had brushed past me on the roof.

I pick up her skateboard and look it over to give myself something to do and allow myself to talk to her finally.

"I don't think I have ever seen an initiate's locker so organized before." She looks up at me and smiles, her bangs falling into her eyes a bit.

"Well that must be frustrating to handle. Do they know where they are? I mean locker inspections and all that?"

I snort and roll my eyes and something catches my eye so I put the board down "Apparently not." I mutter and pick up the shoe polishing kit and quirk an eyebrow in question at her.

"What? You guys don't do inspections of gear?" She frowns at me and I can't help but chuckle.

"If I thought they wouldn't completely fail at it I would push for it. Bad enough I can barely get them to understand simple instructions." I roll my eyes and put the shoe kit back into the locker.

We sit in the quiet for a few minutes as she finishes and locks the locker. She picks up her board and stands and I rise along with her. I don't think she notices she did it, but she follows my movements closely with her eyes and licks her lips briefly. A faint look of something dawning on her crosses her eyes and her breath hitches in her chest. I want to ask her what she is thinking of but the look disappears quickly.

"Zeke said Lauren sent you here and I thought I would show you were the parlor is." I say simply.

"Thanks" She nods and moves around the dorm room on her board a bit before hitting the bumpy corridor and getting off and popping it into the air with her foot, catching it expertly.

"These roads need to be repaired." She shrugs and I laugh.

"They aren't really made for skateboarding." My grin makes her smile too.

"Or human passage..." She muttered after she almost twisted her ankle in a hole in the walkway and I catch her. We stand there talking like that.

"Just don't run down them in the dark. And you get to know them after a while." I laugh.

"They might cause issues on drunken sparring night, you realize this don't you."

"Initiates aren't supposed to be drinking anyways." I sigh this out. I don't want her doing drunken sparring during training at the very least. We both realize I am still holding her as we look down and I let go reluctantly and we step away from each other and start walking again.

"Not even when a member is present to keep an eye on us?" I bet she gets what she wants when she uses those puppy dog eyes.

"Not really, but it isn't like it doesn't get ignored anyways." I growl out trying to fight the urge to kiss her right there.

"Ok, I promise no excessive drunkenness from me. A few rums and cokes barely faze me." She shrugs.

"How about just no double ko's and almost drowning in your own vomit. I am all about pushing limits but..." Maybe if I can make her compromise she won't need to rebel.

"It was mostly to rebel, but… nah...I can't even pretend." She rolls her eyes in amusement, stopping herself from telling a lie "Don't want to lie and you would call me on it."

"Damn straight." I chuckle ruefully.

"What are you thinking about getting done as far as a tattoo?" I ask quietly not wanting the members to hear me. "Please don't tell me some shit like birds. Or roses..." I shudder at the thought of her wearing something so ordinary. She laughs and her bangs fall in her eyes and she tries to blow them out of the way again.

I reach over and move them out of the way for her as she smiles at me with dimple on display again. "No, nothing like that. Edward and I had talked about getting matched ones but that was when his girl was going to be here too. I think it would be too weird and people would assume..."

"That you're together. Yeah I have to admit I had thought the same when I saw you two." I don't think it will be long before Edward realizes how he feels for her.

"Nope I think we have too much dirt on each other. Has to be some mystery right? Besides we bathed naked together as kids, you can't come back from that" She grins at me but I can't smile back.

"If you say so." I mutter frowning. She is oblivious but then again he may be too.

"Have you ever seen the ancient Polynesian tribal art? I want something in that style. That means strength, protector and fresh starts." She goes back to the tattoo topics.

"You had a bad start?" It again makes me wonder why she is so familiar and what could have happened to her.

"We all have our demons." She whispers faintly and there is nothing that I want more than to tell her I will fight those demons for her.

"I could do you." I look over at her to see her answer to my offer of doing her tattoo. She goes red and I wonder why.

"Do me?" She grins and blushes looking away. Yes, I want to say, that too.

"Your tattoo that you want. I learned how to do tattoos and have some equipment. I have drawn a few, my own included." I laugh instead and playfully push her shoulder.

"That would be good. If you don't mind where I am getting it done." She goes red again and I think back to her in the dorm changing.

I clear my throat "If you are uncomfortable.."

"Have you seen the bathroom and sleeping quarters? If I was I would have to get over it quickly. It isn't likely any of the guys are going to go out of their way to not look."

"They should." I growl because I know it won't be just Peter trying to ogle her.

"Shoulda, coulda, woulda. Sorry, I need to stop being a smart mouth. I made myself that promise I would curtail that here." She frowns.

"I haven't said anything. You will know when I don't appreciate it." I smirk because I actually love her responses to shit. It makes me think or makes me laugh.

"Kind of hard not to pick up on that. But you have to be how you are. Lives are on the line and all." There it is again, her saying something that makes me think. I don't want to have to be a dick to her but I know at some point in training I am going to be…going to have to be.

"I don't necessarily like being a complete asshole." I hear her snort and I look over to her and smirk as she grins. "Ok I like it. Just not with certain people. I heard what you said to that Candor girl. While we do try not to target everyone unfairly because of one person's actions it can happen. I would never whip you though." I say not even wanting to think about that with her. Not the kind of punishment whippings anyways, the other playful kind just might be fun.

"I am expecting lots of laps in my future though, it is inevitable with the lack of common sense in this group." I laugh at her prediction and grin.

"Maybe so." We get into the Pit area and make our way up to the parlor and when we get around more people and I put on my intimidating aura.

"I would like it if you helped me with it, the tattoo. And I draw too so maybe two heads would be better than one?" She shrugs and I smile at her.

"You draw? You have any sketches?" I ask quietly as we near the corridor the parlor is off of, she shakes her head and has a sad look pass over her face.

"I had what was on my back. 'I had strings but now I'm free'...'" I stop her and pull her into the little alcove that is dark and has less people around. She only comes up to my chin and I look down at her as I press her against the wall using my hand on her waist.

Where the fuck has she learned my quote? I had just gotten that shit inked onto my ribs seven months ago.

"What does that mean? Because all day you have said things and I have to wonder why you are saying them? How could you know some of the things you say? Things I think myself. If I didn't know better I would think you were reading my mind." My jaw clenches as I try to control myself. She is truly shocked by my words. Still how can she grasp things I only learned by the hard fucking way?

"I say them because they are either true or I have experience with them. Sometimes, though rarely, it is to diffuse a situation. What thing specifically are you referring to?" Her eyes were full of pain, pain for me? That can't be fucking right.

"The puppet strings." I frown "Why do you even know that quote?"

"We all have demons, Eric, even Pinocchio." She replies softly. One thing is for sure, she knows pain on a personal level. But she also knows something of my pain. How I don't know but I don't care.

I start to pull her to me my hand moving under her jacket and tank and tracing the outline of her pants. The feel of her skin on mine electrifying me. I see her gaze go to my lips and I feel her breathing get heavier matching my own. She looks up into my eyes and whatever she finds there has her pulling back gently.

She shakes her head as if to clear it and I let her move away from me. "I should go." She clears her throat "Could you tell the others I just wasn't up to it? I'm just going to..." She turned around then and walked away as fast as she could and I let out a sigh.

I go tell Lauren brusquely she wasn't feeling well then head to the my apartment and slam the door. Whatever she saw in my eyes it didn't make her fear me as a person. Maybe the attraction we both felt.

Even now her laugh and insights are haunting me. I remember the tattoo and I grab my sketchbook and start to work. First I draw her body without being graphic and I start to design the ancient Polynesian tribal style.

With lines of swirls that come to points in some places and form symbols and patterns in others. It isn't one continuous tattoo instead I break it up and have it follow the lines of her curves that are burned in my mind. That beautiful spot just above the breast where it formed the swell of the breast part I placed one set of swirls to go up to the shoulder skimming the collar bone. The others I had along her hips into the small of her back and along her shoulders and into the back of her neck.

When I am done I stand back and look at it. In the swirls I had created hidden symbols of the factions and the manifestos of Dauntless and Erudite. I also included a bit of my maze pattern. I made sure to include some of her own words in there. 'It's all one heartbeat to the next', and even the quote that had caused us to have that moment. I don't know why I included one and I frowned looking at it, I didn't remember physically putting it in there. It was Amar's last words. 'Faction before blood, my faction is my blood'. I thought about erasing that but didn't. It felt right somehow even if I couldn't explain it. I folded up the paper and looked at the time. It was dinner time so I made my way down.

I joined Logan and Milla who were already sitting with Lauren and Zeke. Edward was already there with the other three dauntless-born initiates and I sat my tray down. Logan looked at my plate and saw I had replicated what Zoe had for lunch right down to the damn pudding. He smirked at me.

"Lauren was telling us what Zoe had said to Four when she jumped and found out it was a net at the bottom." He grinned and Milla looked amused too.

"Do tell." I say sarcastically. I hear the others snicker. I shoot a glare at them and Edward narrows his eyes at me. "What?" I close my eyes as I realize what I just walked into.

"What what in the butt butt." Zeke immediately shouts. I hear chuckles around me and I even grin a bit then shrug.

"You owe her the damn royalty not me." I saw as I douse my steak with tabasco and the pudding too.

I hear someone spitting out a drink and see Lynn coughing her drink trying hard not to look at me. I sigh and shaking my head. Whatever I don't even care that I am showing just how much she got to me. "So are you going to tell me what she said Lauren?"

"She yelled out Dammit! That was disappointing!" I grin because that sounds like her.

"She told Four she half expected there to be a big pool of icy cold water or that there would be a wind turbine running that made the person think they were falling for forever. When really they were just above ground the whole time. I about pissed myself laughing at Fours face of disbelief." Everyone laughed and I chuckled.

"Yeah I bet that was a sight." I smirked.

"You should hear what the other initiates as saying about her. She apparently has people hero worshipping her for not only the way she continuously beat the ass of that shithead Peter, but also shut down the Candor girl. Nobody wants to be stuck doing shit punishment jobs because a candor won't learn they aren't there anymore." Zeke says.

"She is going to hate that shit. The hero worship I mean. She hates ass kissers and she hates attention being on her." Edward shrugs.

"Where is she?" I ask and see everyone grow uncomfortable.

Lauren shrugs with a frown. "We went to the dorm to find her and she wasn't there. Four said he knew where she was and that she was fine but wouldn't say."

"Fucking number boy, just has too…FUCK!" I kick the empty seat across from me and look over to where I see Four sitting with the transfers. Peter isn't there. "Peter isn't here either but I am sure she is just fucking fine right!" I growl.

"She's fine." Logan says pointedly looking at his tablet phone. He looks up and nods at me then I feel mine get alerted. I take it out and look at it, she is in the training room. I nod and continue listening to the others telling stories but my mind isn't on that right now.

I still watch the door to see if she is going to come eat. Dinner is well past and she still hasn't come. I excuse myself and walk over to the line. Fuck if she is going to pass out cause she isn't eating.

I grab a box and put what they have left which isn't much. I did manage to snag a piece of cake. I look at the box and think I better leave it in her locker or something and I will leave a note. I write out the note and use my key to unlock her locker and put the box, note and sketch in there. I walk out and intend to head back to my apartment but find myself walking to the training room.

I walk in and she is oblivious just as she was in the dorm. I move back into the shadows and watch her as she moves. She is beautiful in her form. She isn't the strongest at her punches but she has some pretty mean kicks. Her punches and jabs are meant to throw someone off from her next kick attack. I just get lost in watching her until we are both interrupted by none other than the punk, Peter.

"Why are you in here Zoe? Lights out is soon."

"Fuck it all Peter just leave me alone already." She growled and hit the bag harder than before as soon as she heard him.

"Look, whatever it is you are going to exhaust yourself before tomorrow. Just come to the dorm and get a shower and come to bed." God damn I am going to kill him. I am going to fucking break him in half.

"Come to bed? You are un-fucking believable Peter. You think because I am here" she punctuates with kicks and jabs "and you're here that I am going to" windmill and butterfly kick, 1,2 punch "jump in bed with you?" She leaps into the air and does a spectacular spin kick. Damn I love watching her.

"I didn't before and I for damn sure won't now. My first time is not going to be with the likes of you Hayes. You had your chance and you blew it. You demanded we be in a relationship first. You set the rules but you didn't want to play by them." Her words don't register with me at first because I am caught up in the heaving of her sports bra clad chest. Then it registers finally.

She's a fucking virgin? How is that even possible? What kind of moron let her go? Then I roll my eyes at myself. Well obviously that fucking moron.

"I fucked up and I let you go. I know this Zoe." He walked towards her his hands up pleading with her. "I saw a chance to get some and thought you would never find out. I thought you wouldn't really even care and that if I just got it out of the way I could wait like I wanted us too."

"What were you even thinking Peter? What guy demands to wait until they get married? You demanded that Peter, not me. I was fine with taking it that next step. Thank fuck I didn't though. Because at least when you broke my heart I didn't have to look back on that." She picked up all of apparently newly bought gear and started to walk out and I frowned.

She isn't a quick lay by a long shot. I need to back off at the very least until I figure out what I want from her.

"I want to be with you Zoe. I want to try again." He sounded like he was in pain and I thought good. He broke her heart for something stupid.

She stopped in her tracks at that and I almost lost it. Please baby don't fall for that. Please. I pleased with her in my mind, something inside me feeling like it was tearing.

"It's too late Peter. I loved you once but not anymore. We are two different people now Peter. You're better off not getting close to me anyways. People end up dead when they do." I should be relieved but I can't. The pain she showed earlier was nothing to what ripped through her then when she talked about people ending up dead.

"Zoe..." Peter called out. He actually dropped to his knees and started hitting his hands on the ground.

"Fucking stupid! Fucking stupid sack of shit! Gods dammit!" He stopped and sat there for a minute until he nodded. "I'll get her back. I'll get her back when I show her I can be number one." He said bitterly and got up to walk out.

Once they were both gone I walked into the hallway and stood frowning as I looked down the hallway. He isn't going to get her back like that and not likely ever. She meant what she said about not wanting him like that. She does still love him though I could tell that along with the pain in her voice.

I would have to watch out for Peter. If he got desperate enough he might do something really stupid to her or someone else.

I did figure out one thing for sure. I wanted her at least physically really badly. Maybe even in another way other than physical. I just couldn't act on it until I let her get to know me better. Somehow we had shared pain in our lives. Not directly shared but at least of the similar kind. That alone made me want to get to know her just as much as I wanted her to know me.

I walked to the dorms to call lights out and watched as Peter followed her out of the shower. She was dressed in a tank and undies. I could feel myself growl when I saw Peter drop his towel looking right at her.

I saw her picking at her food laying sitting against the headboard of her bed with Edward stretched out beside her. I couldn't tell what they were talking about but she looked sad and Edward looked worried. Then he looked at me and saw me staring. He frowned and said something to her and I knew it had to be about me.

I saw her shaking her head and taking a few more bites. Then she was getting up and walking towards me and where the trash can is. She threw her box away and looks at me. I give her a small smile and I can't help but blush because I know she isn't trying to do anything by sleeping in just a tank. She looks amazing and not just because of the lack of cloths.

She smiles at me softly and for a moment we just stare at each other, just like before she ran off. She doesn't run this but she does sign 'goodnight and thanks'. I want to do something, say something. But the moment is gone and she turns and crawls back into bed, crawling over her friend. It looks like they are going to stay that way for a while and I hear him faintly say he misses his ex. I try to push down my anger at him being like that with her.

"Lights out! Remember training tomorrow at 8am. Be ready to work" I yell out. My eyes still on Zoe until I flick the lights off and watch for a moment more then head back to my apartment. When I get there Logan makes his way up.

"Here, take this." He hands me a glass with some whiskey and we go into my apartment. "Figured you would need it."

I nod and kick off my shoes and we settle on my couches as he fiddles with my tv.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I take a sip.

"Pulling up the control room footage from the dining hall at lunch. Thought you might get a kick out of her humor. She reminds me of you enough. You and your damn Erudite brain." He smirks at me.

"You and your Candor mouth." I smirk back at him.

We watch and I do enjoy the way she talks but I don't like the easy camaraderie between her friend or how often he hugs and holds her.

"I need to know something Eric. I need to know what you are going to do if you find out she is Jeanine's kid." He looks at me staring daggers at me.

I stiffen at this. "Do you know she is?" I glare back at him.

"I am pretty sure she is. But I need to know if she is, can you handle it. Because if you can't then you back off of her and stay away." He demands and at first I am pissed.

"She looks nothing like her. Why are you sure she might be?" I stall with my mind whirling.

I fucking hate Jeanine with everything I am. Her lies and promises of power were just fucking weak when it came down to it. I would have fucking gone along with it too. Just bought right into those fucking lies until she turned on all of us that had followed her.

"I looked into her and the other girl. She was adopted and not in any kind of legal adoption. It was all very underhanded. It also had all kinds of clauses for things that were to be allowed done to her. Nothing was spelled out but you can bet it wasn't pretty."

"She fucking experimented on her own kid?" I ask disgusted. Of course she fucking would. Why am I acting surprised by this?

"Do you think she wouldn't?" He scoffed at me and tossed back his own glass of whiskey and poured a bit more from the bottle he had brought.

I toss mine back and hold it out for him to pour more "I shouldn't be surprised. I thought I recognized that name, Trinity. I heard it once when she was talking about an experiment. I didn't put it together with it being a person though." I drink deeply. "You know when I was showing her to the parlor, she responded to something I asked. I asked her about her drawing and if she had sketches. Stupid really because of course she didn't have anything. She just said she had what was on her back and then quoted and I shit you not 'I once had strings but now am free'. I should have put it together with all the other things she hinted at, mentioning we all have demons." I take another drink and he watches me.

"Then in the training room.."

"I know." He nodded, cutting me off.

"You know what?"

"Max and Four were watching her. With great interest. Four hasn't found the internal camera I placed in there yet. I heard what she said about people ending up dead around her." He stopped and looked off. He was holding something back.

"What were they saying Logan?" I leaned forward and demanded.

"Just…that if you found out about her you might hurt her because of who she was the daughter of. Four thinks she needs to be protected from you and Peter." He looked away.

I threw my glass against the wall. "Fucking Tobias! You sack of fucking shit!"

I jump and pace but then whirl around and start punching the wall again and again. Until I finally stop and lean against it. "I don't fucking care that she is her egg donor. That girl is nothing like that bitch. Not Zoe, in fact I would bet that she goes out of her fucking way to be nothing like her."

I turn around to face him and he nods. My chest is still heaving and my nostrils flared in anger. "He is right that we need to watch out for Peter." I nod and Logan runs his hand through his hair agreeing with me.

"Yeah, he doesn't seem the most stable. I looked at the roof shit, and he just did not get the hint at all. Even if he doesn't hurt her, that candor chick might try to." He drains the glass he has and walks to the door after leaving the glass near the bottle.

"Don't drink all of that. I am going home to Milla." He smiles at her name.

I make a whipped sound and he smirks and points to the screen where I had paused the vid file on Zoe smiling at something. "Yeah, yeah. Point taken."

After he leaves I sit looking at the screen for a bit more and drink just a bit more whiskey. After a while I turn off the tv and put my boots back on and head out to the Chasm.

When I get there I sit off to the side away from the corridor doors or the bridge and just listen to the rush of water far down looking at my hands and thinking.

It's about 2am and the sounds of the compound are still making any sounds stand out. I was in the middle of wondering if Zoe is still lying beside her friend or if he went to his own bed. Something tells me he didn't. I can't even blame him, even if the thought is driving me crazy right now.

Steps coming from the corridor with the training rooms and dorm area sound and I watch as if summoned Zoe walks to the bridge. I back into the shadows with a frown.

She stops and on the bridge and just stands there looking down, her face is filled with pain and I see tears on her cheeks. She is wearing the leggings and tank top and tennis shoes as if she had to get dressed in a hurry.

The silence is broken as she begins to sing. Her voice filled with sadness and tears. Even with all of that or maybe because, it is beautiful and haunting. The words worry me especially when her throat catches on calling herself a sinner and giving up. I can't bear to watch if this is what this is. I don't move right away in case I am wrong. I just listen to her song but I am ready to move if I need to stop her.

Looking up from underneath  
Fractured moonlight on the sea  
Reflections still look the same to me  
As before I went under

And it's peaceful in the deep  
Cathedral where you cannot breathe  
No need to pray, no need to speak  
Now I am under all

Oh, and it's breaking over me  
A thousand miles out to the sea bed  
Found the place to rest my head

(Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go)

And the arms of the ocean are carrying me  
And all this devotion was rushing over me  
And the questions I have for a sinner like me  
But the arms of the ocean deliver me

Though the pressure's hard to take  
It's the only way I can escape  
It seems a heavy choice to make  
But now I am under, oh

And it's breaking over me  
A thousand miles down to the sea bed  
I found the place to rest my head

(Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go)

And the arms of the ocean are carrying me  
(So cold and so sweet)  
And all this devotion was rushing out of me  
And the questions I have for a sinner like me  
But the arms of the ocean deliver me

And it's over and I'm going under  
But I'm not giving up  
I'm just giving in

Oh, slipping underneath  
So cold and so sweet

In the arms of the ocean, so sweet and so cold  
And all this devotion, well, I never knew at all  
And the questions I have for a sinner released  
In the arms of the ocean deliver me

(Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go)

Deliver me

(Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go)  
Never let me go, never let me go)

Deliver me  
(Never let me go, never let me go)  
Never let me go, never let me go)

Deliver me  
Never let me go, never let me go

And it's over  
I'm going under  
But I'm not giving up  
I'm just giving in

Ah, slipping underneath  
Wooh, so cold, but so sweet

Her voice breaks as the last note leaves her and her tears fall again. I am about to get up and walk to her but she starts to speak.

"I made it Daddy. I am sorry it took so long to make it here to say goodbye. They changed the age and it took me a bit longer."

My breath catches in my throat and my heart stops. Her father was a Dauntless? Jeanine and a Dauntless but who?

"I know you didn't want me to have to Daddy but you have to know it was always going to be me finish it. I have to. She has to be stopped. So I will be brave and strong and if I have to I will embrace the darkness inside me. She can't destroy anyone again Daddy. Your sacrifice can't have been in vain." Her sobs break my heart and she starts again "She has hurt so many people. But I need to ask you Daddy, if I fail…can you find a way protect those we love. The new family we have here and the old. Tris and her family, Edward, Peter, Lauren, Uri and Zeke, Lynn and Mar…Four..keep them safe. Don't let them be turned into the zombies she wants to make them all. And if you could, if I can't before I die, can you find a way to let him know you and I never blamed him. He was never second best. Not to you or me and he will not be for the lucky person person he gives his heart to. I will try and help him if I can. I can't ask him to help Daddy not after what she did to him. He is still in such pain and I can't do anything to change that but I can make sure he doesn't suffer anymore."

She pulls something from her waistband and I see a shining of light on metal and I start to rise slowly. "Faction before blood, our faction is our blood. Now your blood returns Daddy. And I swear by the blood I leave here tonight if I have to slit the bitches throat myself I will end this. Even if I die trying."

She holds her hand out over The Chasm and lets blood fall, then the knife after. Now I know why she looked so familiar. She is Amar's daughter and she has come home. She knows about me but doesn't blame me, more than that...maybe even cares for me.

Her words about being second best make my heart feel like it was going to break. I had thought he saw me that way because of Four. But he never did and neither does she. Now the looks that Jeanine shared with Amar made a bit more sense. How had what obviously been love turned to hate so quickly? He had chosen to stay with Dauntless. Did he know she was pregnant or did he find out too late?

I can't make my body move to go after her even though my eyes follow her movements. I stand there staring at the space she once occupied before I finally move.

I walk to the bridge and stand there for a moment. I pull a blade from my vest and make my own vow. "Faction before blood, my faction is my blood. Now my blood joins you both. She will not die if I can help it. She will not fight alone. Your sacrifice is not in vain Amar. I promise you all this with my own vow."

I cut my palm just as I did four years before and let it drop into The Chasm to join hers. I tear a bit of my shirt to stop the blood and walk slowly back to my apartment. I enter and mechanically put a bandage on the cut and then get ready for bed. Training has just taken on a whole new meaning for me and I needed to be ready for the next few weeks to keep my promise.

I fall to sleep with her haunting voice singing sadly, her cobalt and ice blue eyes dancing with laughter.


	3. Faction Before Blood: Chapter 3

**A/N: (Edit of existing chapter to clear up annoying grammar and other little things.) Wow! I have had some serious interest in this story. Which is kind of interesting because the only reason I started to write it was during an insomnia fueled marathon of Top Shot on the History Channel and a youtube binge of fanfic videos. You can thank this one fanmade Eric video called Eric/Fight- All Good Things, it seriously inspired me and pissed me off. Inspired me because I decided to embrace that animalistic side he has. Pissed me off because every freaking time I saw that stupid blue Erudite band on the Dauntless uniform all that popped into my damn head was "Gestapo!". Anyways, if you haven't seen that fan made video I would suggest it, does a pretty good job of capturing Eric's ode de perfume or what have you and is exactly how I am visualizing him in this. (Especially the scene after he chases the train and is all breathing hard with his nostrils flared and burning eyes). So between that and a running binge of Tove Lo's Moments song as Zoe's theme song I can see that this will be darker. I hope everyone likes it so far. Like I said I am doing my first foray into a dark OC to match Eric**

 **Chapter 3**

 _Zoe_

My alarm went off and I came awake looking around me blearily. After my late night errand I should feel more exhausted but being able to finally say goodbye has helped. It also helped that I had found things my father had left for me in the pre-arranged abandoned storage room.

He had left anything of value he had. His ring, his tablet, a few vid discs, and pictures he had taken of us over the years, even his weapons. I knew he would leave me a few knives at least but was surprised to see his sidearms. I had made sure to take the ring and chain he had left for me along with one of the throwing knives for me to use when I made my way to The Chasm to say goodbye to my Father.

I hadn't planned on singing. It had just happened and the song had seemed the right choice for the place where he had sacrificed himself. Being able to speak to him there and give my vow to stop my mother once and for all had healed the hurt a bit. It still was hard to be here without him. We had made such plans for being together here and maybe finally being able to tell everyone I was his daughter. I don't think that hole his death left will ever fully heal.

Not feeling exhausted did not mean that I was in any way alert or in a good mood. Edward had me locked in his arms and I felt a hand somewhere it should not be.

"Edward, if you don't want to lose the fucking hand get it off my boob and your wood out of my back." I growled and elbowed him in the stomach. When he let me go I rolled off the bed and blearily pulled those same leggings and shoes on.

"Sorry Zoe." He mumbled and rolled back over to sleep.

I grunted and stumbled my way through the door. Tris caught up with me and I could tell she was one of those chipper people.

"If you value your limbs…don't speak Tris. For God's sake do not speak or ask me things before I get coffee." I mutter as she walks beside me guiding me into the dining hall when I almost bump into walls. She remains silent but I can feel her laughing.

We make our way in and I know I look like a zombie. I always do when it is too early in the morning. Capture the flag is really going to suck for everyone. My team and the other. Most likely the other team would suffer more.

"You're not going to get something to eat?" She asks as I stumble blindly

"Limbs Tris…keep your limbs and less talk. I need coffee please for Gods sakes just lead me to the coffee. My eyes will open in a second when I get it." I growl and hear chuckling around me but I don't even fucking care. She leads me and puts cup in my hand.

"Do they have bigger?" She laughs and hands me a bigger cup and I have to pry open an eye to see the coffee enough to pour it into the cup. I don't even walk away. I just fill, drink it and fill it up again and drink a bit more coffee then refill it again. I hear more laughter and I look around looking for blonde and head to it.

"I hope that's you Tris but if not fuck it." I say as I plop down beside her and immediately take another big swig of the coffee. I think I burned off all my heat sensitivity with my love of hot sauce and scalding hot coffee.

Once I get two or three or four more big swigs I sigh in pleasure and my eyes open a little more. I look beside me and Tris is smiling at me in an amused way.

"Are my limbs safe now?" She chuckles. And I look around and see not only her but Eric, Logan, and Lauren all looking at me in amusement.

"Indeed they are. Sorry I have a serious coffee addiction." I can now sip on from my cup and look at her plate. Some fruit and milk, I shake my head. "Tris you need protein. We're going to be working our bodies hard." I run my hands over my face and look around. "If I get you and me an omelet will you eat it?"

"I have never had one before. But sure just not too spicy. None of your…what was it Edward said you couldn't live without?" She smirked at me and Logan and Lauren laughed.

"Ass burner. Nah, couldn't start a spice rookie out on that. We'll start with salt and pepper." I wink at her and they all laughed harder at that.

"Why am I at a table full of chipper people?" I shake my head chug more coffee and get up to go get us food.

"How did you sleep Zoe?" Eric asks from right behind me.

I shrug "Not great but enough I guess. You?" I get Tris and I two cheese omelets with salt and pepper but grab Tabasco for me. I also grab bacon and fruit for the both of us and refill my coffee. Eric plops milk on my tray.

"I slept ok, couldn't really get to sleep until after 2 or so. Drink the milk. You barely ate last night." He commanded me.

I nod and walk back over to the table and plop back down.

"You got more coffee? How many cups do you drink?" Tris asked incredulously.

"Your limbs are still in danger until I have had at least two cups. I can tolerate chipperness at about the third cup. I am on cup number I don't give a fuck." I shrug "Here is a cheese omelet. Without the ass burner, eat. Your body will thank me later." I growl out still not so awake and start to drink the coffee in gulps.

Eric nudges me with his elbow and shakes his head at me while Logan just laughs.

"Isn't that really hot?" Lauren asks.

"Yep." Is all I say as I put my cup down and start dousing my omelet and bacon. "I think I burned any heat sensitivity I might have had with my love of scalding black coffee and hot sauce or just spicy food in general." I look over and see Eric's head tilted looking at me with a grin and Logan smiling.

"Not a morning person I take it?" Logan asks and I in my head reply with my quip of 'Nice observation Captain Obvious'. I take a beat and look at him but stay silent. Not a good idea to sass a leader just because you can't control your grumpiness Zoe.

"Not really" I finally say simply and Eric bursts out laughing. I notice he has a huge cup of coffee of his own.

"What?" Wondering what was so funny.

"What what in the butt butt…wasn't it?" He replies with a wink and my jaw drops open. I am apparently not the only one, but Eric still reaches out from beside me and closes my jaw.

I shake my head "Now you owe me either an excursion or a rum and coke. I will leave it to you decide the royalty you shall pay Eric the Egregious." I dig into my omelet and he reaches over and swipes one of my pieces of bacon and raises his pierced eyebrow at, me taunting me.

I shrug "I didn't kill the pig but I am pretty sure there is more where that came from." I smirk back at him. I hear him chuckle and he shakes his head.

"It's too early for all that sass Zoe." But he grins at me.

"It's too early for cheerful people. But what can you do, they make all kinds." I shrug and drink some milk instead of coffee and grimace.

"How is the omelet Tris?" I ask looking back at her. She nods and I see it is almost all gone.

"It was good. Did you add more spices than the salt and pepper you said you were going to start me on?" She asked spearing more of the eggs.

"Nope just cheese. Didn't want to overload those virgin taste buds of yours." I take a bite of my food as everyone including Tris laughs.

"Why was it important for me to have protein?" She asked seriously.

"Builds muscle mass and helps regenerate energy. We are going to be expending a lot of it over the next few weeks. Especially with our extra training sessions." I say shrugging while Lauren nods.

"She's right Stiff. Get all the protein you can. Initiation is hell." Eric said with a knowing smirk.

"Extra sessions? I didn't think we would be doing anything after 6 pm?" Tris asks worried.

"You don't have to join me but I plan on heading in after I get more coffee in me and eat. Honestly though Tris it would help you to put on muscle and lifting weights and some calisthenics." I say firmly I have to help her but I can't if she refuses.

"It isn't a bad idea Stiff." Eric says gruffly and gets up to go get some food since he apparently only got coffee or was following me. I have no clue really.

"Don't mind him." Logan says shrugging then looks over to Tris who is sitting across from him on my other side. "They are both right, get what you can in while you can before fights. You are at a slight disadvantage from the way your former faction lived. The denial of foods or enough of it can do some damage. So keep loading up on proteins but balance it out and work with Zoe. I am sure it will help you out." He winked at me and went to get his own food

Lauren looked at me a smile on her face. I looked confused at her "What's up?"

She shrugged and looked at Eric and then at me and smiled.

"Lauren…" I warned.

"I know what you are about to say but he has laughed more than I have ever seen him. Not even with girls he hooks up and then moves one with. Actually, never with them. So I am going to ask you how you feel."

I look towards Tris who has wide eyes and is looking between Eric and I. "I feel that I have four long weeks of training and that cuts are being made. So I feel that I have to put everything I am into this. I cannot fail Lauren. It's a matter of life and death. Is he hot as hell? Yes he is hot. Do I think I would ever have a shot with him? To be honest no I don't. And the rest of what I may or may not feel is hella complicated and not the kind of thing I am going to delve into without some kind of alcohol."

I frown and shake my head. "Man. I really did not mean to even say that much. You are not allowed to ask me serious questions in the morning." I growl out and she chuckles but nods "It is all true but seriously it all stays between us."

Lauren smiles "You are my little Sis. Tris here too. I officially have adopted you both.

"Good seeing as how she is my cousin and all." I say without thinking first. "Wait. Stop, I wasn't supposed to say it like that or here. I can't talk about it here or around others." I beg them both and they nod. "I promise later to you both ok?" They nod and smile at me.

"Are you this truthful on alcohol?" Lauren asks laughing.

"Probably worse. I have no fucking filter when I have drank to the point of me being drunk. It takes a serious amount for me to get that way. Honestly most of my drunken sparring matches I lost to Edward on purpose. He cannot hold his liquor for shit. But this last one I got pretty fucked up." I shrugged and the girls and I laughed as Eric and Logan returned.

Eric and Logan come back. Eric plops a few pieces of bacon on my plate in front of me and Tris some milk.

"Eat and drink it, both of you." He uses his no nonsense leader tone. I make a face at the milk I have been ignoring and Logan laughs.

"Not funny. I am a coffee only gal in the morning. Fuck it I will do as commanded." I say cheekily and drink.

I see Eric smirking out of the corner of my eye. "Good girl." He says and I almost choke on the milk. Lauren starts laughing. I eat a bit more bacon and finish my omelet then see Tris is basically done.

"Is there somewhere I can get protein powders for Tris and I. We are going to need more than what is available to build muscle. Well, no offense Tris, but you kind of need it more and I just need it to maintain." Tris nods and looks shy so I smile at her encouragingly.

"Commissary should have some but I think you can also go to the infirmary and they can order some from Erudite with your specifications." Lauren replied and I stiffened.

"Thanks, but no thanks I will just do the commissary. Because fuck that if I get shit from those people ever again." I grumble out and start to clean up. "I'm done, going to get out of my night clothes since I can see and function now."

Tris laughs but turns a little red. "You almost went without pants." I get my mischievous look at her since she wanted to joke.

"At least it wasn't what I normally wear to bed…you know, nothing." I see her mouth drop and Eric's eyes snap to mine completely dark.

"Umm, gotta go now. Forgot to wake Edward back up after I elbowed the shit out of him this morning. Meet you in the training room?" I look at Tris but Eric nods too and his tone becomes angry. Logan has an eyebrow raised at me and a grin on his face.

"I have to let you guys in." He scowls as he says this and I get up with a frown wondering what I did to piss him off. I throw my tray away and get more coffee then gulp it down on the way. I finish by the time I get to the dorm and hurry to get Edward up and changed. Peter is waking up and looking at me. He smiles and nods to me.

"Morning Zoe." He says without his usual arrogance and I am slightly shocked.

"Morning Peter." I mumble and make my way to my bunk.

"Up Edward or you don't get breakfast or extra training in." I kicked the bunk bed and pulled the blanket off of him, his morning wood still there. "For fucks sakes Edward I told you to take care of that already. You're not sleeping with me again unless you keep your hands and other limbs to yourself."

I start yelling as I unlock my locker and pull out clothes. I run to the bathroom and get changed and teeth brushed. I am re-braiding my hair when I walk out and Edward shambles past me mumbling sorry and looking embarrassed. I shake my head and grab my workout gear and jacket. I also toss my previous day's clothes in our provided laundry hampers. I will have to make sure to do the wash at least tomorrow. I hate having stinky clothes around. I make my bed really quick and turn to go.

I see Eric standing by the door arms crossed over his chest and still not looking happy at all. Well fuck! Not a great way to start the training day. Not wanting to keep him waiting I walked fast to join him "Sorry Sir. I didn't think I took that long." I said as I followed him.

"It's Eric, Zoe and you didn't. I just wanted to make sure you got there." He said with a clenched jaw.

"I am sorry Eric." I say then put a hand on his arm to stop him for a moment he stopped and looked at me. I couldn't read his expression but that isn't anything new. "I really appreciate everything you have done. I am paying that kindness back poorly by asking this, but have I done something to make you mad?"

"Why was your friend sleeping in your bed?" He said in a very gruff and tense manner.

I shrugged with my own frown. "He needed comfort and to be honest I did too. We both miss Mayra and then I was having personal…" I trail off and start playing with my father's necklace "I suffered a loss and it can get to me sometimes. Last night was one of those nights." I want to tell him but I can't because it would lead to too many questions. I look down at the floor frowning at having to keep this from him.

"Zoe…" His voice is soft so I look into his eyes and he is looking at me with sadness. I am taken aback. "I …" he clears his throat. "Fuck, this is hard." He runs a hand through his hair.

"I was at The Chasm. I saw you but I didn't mean to intrude." He pulls me over to an empty room and closes the door. I frown at him as he comes towards me. My back hits the edge of a table and I realize I had been backing up from him.

"You….were there? How much did you hear?" I ask my voice breaking.

"Where did you get his ring Zoe?" He asks moving next to me and lifting the chain in with his fingers. He is looking at the ring with pain in his eyes and is very close to me. I have no more room to back up.

"I'm not going to hurt you." He reaches out to cup my cheek. "Zoe, can you please say something?" He pleads with me gently and slowly stroking my cheek with his thumb.

"He left it for me. He left things for me for the worst case scenario he didn't see me again." I say quietly.

He nodded but didn't move away from me. In fact he pulled me closer and switched us so that he was leaning against the table and I was leaning against him.

"How well did you know him?" He took my hand and started to rub my calloused knuckles as we talked.

"He found me when I was seven. I had tried to find him before that. I had tried hacking into Dauntless files to get his contact information. I don't know how he found me since my….she wouldn't have told him." I closed my eyes and hoped he wouldn't ask about who my mother was.

"Don't worry I don't blame you for her." He said quietly. My eyes snapped open and to his.

"How?" I simply ask.

"Logan heads Intel we had already had a report made that morning that a child of hers was choosing that day. I honestly didn't see any resemblance of her in you at all, still don't. Not a bad thing really all things considered. Anyways after I went back to my apartment, Logan came to me to ask me what I would do if I found out you were her daughter. Not once Zoe, did I think any of this is your fault." He pulled me even closer to him. "You're more like Amar if nothing else. Honestly though from what I have seen you aren't really either of them. You are your own person Zoe." He smiled at me and I gave a small smile and nodded back.

"Thank you. I wanted to tell you, about Amar at least. I just didn't know how to do that.."

"Without mentioning the bitch of Erudite?" He finished for me.

"Yeah." I grinned at him "I like that." He smirked at me.

"So, did he leave you anything else? Other than the knife, chain and ring." I could tell he already knew that he probably did.

"Yes, he stashed it away in a room sort of like this but a bit further away. He sent me a message…" my voice cracked and Eric pulled me to his chest and I let him "...he sent me message on my tablet letting me know where to find the instructions to get to it all. We had a place we went to spend time together. That was where I had been secretly living after he died. She was furious and.." I couldn't finish

"It's ok Zoe. She won't touch you again. I don't know what she did to you but she won't do it again. I made my own vow Zoe and you aren't going to be alone in this." He whispered as he held me. My arms went around his waist and we held each other tightly sharing in the grief.

"I feel like there is this hole in me filled with darkness Eric. I hate her and everything she is. I want to do the right thing and bring her to justice but part of me, no most of me.."

He nods and pushes me back to look in my eyes. "You want her dead and by your own hand. I get that Zoe. And if it comes to that, if we can't bring her to our societies justice, then we will make our own for her."

He grins in a wicked way and I realize I match his grin with my own "If it comes to it Eric, I get to be the one, promise?"

"Promise." His fingers slowly graze my neckline of my tank and jacket, fingering the ring. "For your father, but also for us, I promise. Faction before blood, my blood is my faction. My blood joins you both. Those were the words I spoke last night at the chasm and I mean it Zoe." My breath quickens for more reason than one. His touch and words are sending shivers down my spine.

"Eric" I breathe out and I know for the first time I am truly feeling desire, not the curiosity I had felt with Peter. I can't give in to it just yet. He deserves to be told. "I need to talk to you about other things, about Jeanine. I was already going to accept your offer for the tattoo, so maybe.."

His fingers are still brushing against my skin and have now moved to the spot where the one tattoo will be. "After dinner I can meet you at The Chasm, we can get started and talk. I take it this will be something serious?"

My breath is taken away as he leans forward and brushes his lip on my collar bone. "Yes." I moan a bit and I feel him smile.

He pulls back and I open my eyes to look at him. I see his desire for me in his eyes. When he leans forward the next time he captures my lips in a kiss. First it is gentle and soft as if he is giving me time to push him away.

When his lips touched mine I felt that same electricity that I had felt with his other touches. It was a gentle kiss at first as if he was afraid to go any further. I moved more into him and reached one arm out to grasp his vest.

Slowly he deepened the kiss and his tongue demanded entrance which I gladly let in. We tasted each other and twined our tongues together for what seemed like forever and not long enough. I could feel my heart rate increasing and tingles running down my spine.

We finally slowed the passion of the kiss until he was giving me small kisses over my mouth, then one more to my nose and forehead. Finally we stayed with our foreheads pressed together. I was trying to breathe properly and slow my heart rate down again and he was as well.

"I think I have wanted to do that from the moment you jumped onto the roof." He chuckled a little with his voice a bit husky.

"Really?" I ask surprised.

"The fire you displayed in taking care of yourself paired with how insightful and intelligent you are. All I could think of was you. I have even started to buy into the whole sweet and spicy way of eating." He spoke in a whisper as he still trailed slow kisses over my neck and face.

"I wanted to last night and I realized how much I wanted to in the dorm." I say in a breathy whisper. I could feel him smirk against my neck.

"So that is what you were thinking? I had wondered." He moved to kiss me again and pulled my hips against his. This kiss and holding was more fierce. More of the style that I would imagine from Eric. I realize I am matching it with my own.

This time when we break a part he is left panting and I am smirking.

"You like knowing you can do this to me don't you." He rumbles out and moves his hands to grasp my butt pulling me up against his hardness even more.

I gasp out and clutch his vest tighter and look into his eyes. "Do you like knowing you can do this to me?" He demanded of me but silenced any reply by kissing me roughly and lifting me up, my legs going around his waist.

He turned around again and sat me on the table but kept my legs around his waist. His hand went up under the material of my tank and ghosted across my bare flesh on my stomach and just below my breasts. I moaned against his mouth and he pulled back and looked at me demanding my answer.

"Yes I love it, because it is how you make me feel too." His eyes looked triumphant and he leaned in to kiss me again.

We broke apart again and once again he became gentle with small kisses and the whole thing left me dizzy. "Zoe in training…"

I nod and panted a bit, already knowing what he was worried about. "You have to be hard Eric or we won't learn. And now with us both making this promise you have to be sure I am ready. I expect no less Eric."

He leans back and has both hands on the side of my face "Seriously, where have you been Zoe?"

My eyes water and my voice breaks, thinking about all that time lost. "Eric, there is so much I need to tell you…"

His eyes flash with anger but I can tell it isn't at me. He has some idea now and isn't happy. "I feel like you are familiar but not just because of your father."

I simply nod and he brings me in for a kiss his lips crushing against mine.

"It will have to wait for tonight." He states and I nod. He helps me to straighten my clothes and picks the ring up one more time and tucks the long chain under my tank top. "Four knows that ring well. I don't know if he knows but I would rather he not find out."

I nod understanding. "You know he loved you both but you were like the son he never had Eric. You don't need to be jealous of him anymore. Like I said, you were never second best to either of us."

I feel him let out a shaky breath and he smiled at me. "There is darkness in us both Zoe, but there is also the good. Your father and his love for us is part of that."

My face lights up at his words and I smile at him. "I should get to training. I have someone to catch up. And before you ask Eric because I can see it on your face. She is my cousin and I don't have an overabundance of family at that. Not any family that I care to claim anyways."

I see his shock but then it turns to determination. "Then I guess she is now part of the training I need to implement. If she is important to you. You need to tell her though. Because now there is no way I can do anything but push her so she makes the cut. Do you understand what that means Zoe? I can't go easy on either of you." He looks at me pleadingly.

"I thought I already covered the fact that I understand and will be pissed if you do go easy, Coulter." I wink at him and he chuckles then nods.

"Let's go then." He stops and pulls me to him, frowning. "But first..." He kisses me one more time taking my breath away. "Don't let Edward sleep with you again Zoe. I am not a patient or nice guy and I will hurt him the next time he does it or puts his hands on you."

I can only nod as I am still in a daze. "I kind of already decided he wouldn't be again. We aren't 12 anymore." I shrug.

He smirks at me and kisses my forehead. He takes my hand and leads me away from the room. He doesn't once let go of my hand and I look at him questioningly. "Isn't this a bad thing to do?"

"Fuck it. It isn't against the rules and I want everyone to know to stay away." His wicked grin is on his face again.

I laugh a bit "How very caveman-ish of you"

He winks at me "I could throw you over my shoulder and walk in with you like that." He threatens and I laugh.

"No thank you. I would rather not have my ass up in the air this early in the morning." I grin at him and I know my smile and eyes have that wicked gleam.

"Keep making comments like that Zoe, along with the one about how you sleep, and see what I do." He growled as he stopped right before the training room and took my mouth in a kiss. After which I stumbled a bit because my knees were weak and I looked up to see him smirking at me.

"Dammit Eric, that wasn't fair!" I growl out and he laughs and pulls me into the training room.

Lauren and Tris are there and see us walking in hand in hand. Tris and Lauren get big grins.

"Limbs are still in danger." I say in a sing song voice. Eric chuckles again and pushes me forward and slaps my butt.

"Go warm up Zoe. I will put you and Tris through a few strengthen exercises. I'm going to message Logan and see if he will pick up the supplies for you both some protein supplements. But you need to be regimented in taking them and drinking the shakes ok?" He gives a commanding look to both Tris and I and we nod.

"I am going to show her my stretches and Yoga that will help with where she and I will be the strongest. Our lower body is our best bet in fights." I say as Lauren and Tris walk closer.

"Good plan. Although I will need to see if there is anything I can add, but get to it. You have an hour before training begins." With that he walks off already messaging Logan.

"Lauren and Tris, ok here is that conversation. I was adopted. My birth father was Amar from Dauntless and my mother, well she was Jeanine Prior, now Matthews. Eric knows but other than that it is only you two."

Lauren gasps and looks at me searchingly "His hair had a red tone but he kept it cut close; but I see it in the eyes and nose the most." She nods.

"I have family…" Tris chokes back a sob and pulls me in a hug and I wrap my arms around her.

"You aren't alone here. My father had a saying and I believe it with my whole heart Tris. It is also why I know that you belong here. You don't have to be torn." I push her back to look her in the eyes and give her a pointed look "You don't have to be pulled three ways. Faction before blood, my faction is my blood. We make our choices and give it our all. Your mother knew this best Tris. She left the faction of the brave to make a brave decision. She followed her heart and her love. You have done the same."

"She was Dauntless?" She whispers.

"One of the fiercest and bravest. Don't feel that you were selfish by choosing to come where every fiber of your being was crying out to be. To truly help people Tris, sometimes you have to be selfish." I hug her again and she nods and pulls away and smiles.

She takes a deep breath and squared her jaw and I see the fire in her eyes "What do we need to do?"

"We train and hard. Lauren I am going to need help with something." I look over to see Eric watching us as we go back to stretching. "Tris, I am going to take you to a club and dancing. Combat and dance are tied together. You need to know your body and how powerful you can be. This is a small step to do that. Lauren can you help us out and take us there? I don't want to end up with another rave incident here but going is necessary." I grin at them both "And it will be fun!" I clap and rub my hands together.

Lauren laughs "Sure as long as we get to go shopping for Tris and take you both to the salon."

I groan and flop myself on the ground dramatically. "Can't I just be drawn and quartered."

Lauren laughs and Tris chuckles. I see Eric's shadow fall over me. "Interesting stretch. Don't see much use with it though. Want to run the hole being drawn and quartered thing by me?" He smirks at me.

"Oh my big Sis Lauren has plans to torture me with hairstylists and shopping tomorrow after training. I am feeling generous and dragging Tris along." I smile up at him and use a move I learned.

I pop up on my feet by planting my hands flat on the ground behind me on either side of my face with my legs I kick forward to pop my upper body from the ground. But also to land on my legs and start to stand up rolling my upper body forward. Eric looks impressed, so do Tris and Lauren for that matter.

"That is one of the many things I am going to teach you cousin." I wink at them. "Now the next stretch you need to know how to do is this.." I get that wicked look and go down in a complete split all the way to the ground. Eric's eyes darken and he growls as she stalks off. "Point one Zoe." I softly chuckle.

Lauren throws her head back and laughs. "Oh boy you are trouble. It's a good thing Eric is staking his claim now."

Tris looks confused as he eyes go from me to Eric. "Why is he mad? Is that not a good thing to be able to do."

I blush and look to Lauren for help. She shakes her head. "Nope. Big Sister is stepping out of this one." And she starts to slowly go down in a split as much as she can, she gets down pretty far.

Tris copies and gets down about halfway then winces. "Don't push it Tris. Each time we do this it will limber you up and you can get down further. This helps with kicks being able to hit higher and the recovering time from a kick decreases." I blush again

"And he's not mad but this can be viewed as sexual by some people. I was teasing him on purpose and he had to walk away." I turn red and Tris laughs.

"I get it now. You know I am not as bad about sex and contact as some people. I mean I have never.." She trails off blushing.

"Yeah me either." I admit and they both looked shocked. I shrug, still blushing. "I mean I know all about it intellectually but I never really had the desire to be with anyone. With Peter, I realized recently it was more of a curiosity and honestly most Erudite have had sex way earlier than 18. The only reason I thought of going there with him at all was because I thought maybe I should and wondered what was it really like. Don't get me wrong I cared deeply for Peter and loved him. I just think it was always more as a friend or I don't know almost brother." I say as I frown.

Tris nods with a small smile. "He is cute. But it seems like he tries to be meaner than he really is."

I smile at her and nod. "Pretty much. We all have some kind of shadows that hang over us. Expectations from parents, or society, from yourself. His just happen to come from his father. Hopefully he comes to realize that he doesn't need to please him or live in his shadow anymore." I shrug.

"Ok guys I am going to show you the yoga stretches." I say as I see Eric getting impatient with how much talk we are doing.

For the next ten minutes I show them the yoga poses that help with my core and lower body. After we are done Eric tells me and Tris to run laps and Lauren takes off to wake her initiates up for breakfast.

Edward had come in but stayed away when I shook my head no. I needed to work on getting Tris ready and he wouldn't benefit from the workout we were doing.

"Tris, there is something else you need to know. Eric is helping us and he doesn't have to. He is going to be harder on us than the other initiates. Also, I know one aspect of both of our….aptitudes," I whispered and she looked at me and then around and nodded "...will have us want to step in when Four or Eric are doing something to an initiate that we deem unfair or cruel." I pace my breathing as we run/jog

"You have to understand it is life or death for us in Dauntless. And if one of us is weak they need to be weeded out. If not it could mean the deaths of you, me or someone we are sent to protect. There are going to be people you have already met that will have this happen. Chris might be one of them Tris. She has a bad attitude and she might step into it. You can't intercede and neither can I. If we do we are just as bad as the person being taught a lesson. You have to embrace your Dauntless for this Tris." I look over to her.

"I think I understand what you are saying and I will try. Does this mean they have the right to be cruel though? What about protecting the weak or standing up for someone?" She asks seriously.

I nod as I steady my breathing. "It doesn't mean we stop protecting the weak. But a person that is weak cannot be here Tris. It does mean death for those of us that have to pick up their slack. Do I think they deserve to be factionless for it? I'm not sure honestly. But we can't change the entire faction system by ourselves or as initiates. And to do anything later, we need to get through now."

"Will you help me, to embrace that side of me?" She asks.

I grin over to her. "Of course! we will get you all Dauntless-fied soon. I am getting some tattoos I had been thinking of. Maybe you could put in some thought of what you might want and I can draw it."

"I like ravens, always have been drawn to them. Maybe because they seem to free and I felt like I needed to escape. I would like something to represent my brother, mom and dad. Maybe you can come up with something for that?" She smiles at me.

I nod and Eric tells us to do a cooldown lap. When we finish he tells us to grab water and that we are done for the morning as the others will be coming in. Edward joins us and smiles at me.

"Sorry about this morning Zoe." He blushes "It won't happen again."

I nod and give Tris a look. She walks to the front and I sigh then turn to Edward. "It might be best if we don't.."

He frowns and then nods, interrupting me. "Yeah. We aren't kids anymore and Mayra was the one that always helped with your nightmares before when we would camp out or you slept over anyways."

He looked over at Eric who had his hands crossed over his chest glaring at us. I frowned at Eric who smirked and looked away. "So you and Eric?" He asked and sounded pained.

"Edward, I don't know what is going to happen. I can tell you I feel a strong attraction for him. You know I always kind of.."

"I get it Zoe!" He snaps at me angrily.

I freeze and look at him. "No you don't. But think what you want Edward. If you want to stop being friends, tell me now. Otherwise I suggest you lose your jealousy." I turn around and start to go get more water. He jogs to catch up.

"You've never acted like you would ever feel the same way, Zoe so I don't blame you. I would rather have you as a friend Zoe then not at all. I really do still love Mayra; that was not some kind of act. I just happen to love you too. Maybe though what I feel for you is more…" He runs a hand over his now almost shaved head. He had done that last night apparently. "I guess it is more like a friendship love. Maybe I was just feeling it should be more because we only have each other now."

I reach up and hug him and pull back after he returns it tightly. "I will always be here for you, as a friend and family. But we aren't alone anymore now that we are in the place we will call our home. We will both find someone to be with. For right now I need to make sure we stay here. So we have to train our asses off. Yes I am attracted to Eric and there is more there for me. I don't know about him as far as feelings go but I know he is attracted to me too. I want to at least explore that Edward. I may get hurt or I may not. But I can't live in fear of it just because it might hurt. Broken bones heal and in time so do emotional breaks." I shrug.

"You know others might say shit about it right?" He says looking at Eric as we make our way to join Tris again now that both Four and Eric are here.

"Let them. But when they see he is hell of harder on me than anyone else, except for maybe Tris, then they will shut their mouths. Or I will shut them for them. I am kind of hoping they make me shut it for them to be honest." I get my wicked grin and he shivers.

"You are still scary at times Z." He smiles at me.

"Damn I hope so. Would hate to think I have lost my touch." My eyes meet Eric's as he walks up to me and with a look at Edward cups my chin.

"You all set then?" He demands.

"Yes Caveman, your property line has been set." I smirk at him as he raises an eyebrow at me and smirks back.

"Careful Zoe, your ass could just still end up in the air." He whispers before he kisses me briefly and then walks away leaving me weaving a bit. Tris puts a hand out to steady me.

"Is that a good thing? You know the weaving after being kissed." She asks with a grin.

I sigh dreamily "I am becoming a very big fan of it very quickly" I mumble and we break out into giggles as we lean against each other.

When I turn back I see Four is starring Eric down and they seem about to be inches from getting into it. I sigh loudly and walk to stand inches from them.

"Eric, we talked about this. You don't have to compete anymore." I put my hand on his arm and his eyes flash to mine. He relaxes a bit and looks at Four in contemplation.

"I know you know who she is Four, judging by your reaction." He says quietly in his emotionless voice but I know it is to reign in his volcanic temper.

Four looks surprised at him and then me. "And you are willing to be with him?" He says bitterly.

"You think you know what happened before that night Four but you don't. I do because he left me messages and vid files of it. He let me know of what he was planning before Eric had even said anything to anyone Four. He planned it and you would have known had you bothered to open his messages. He tried to tell you that he was staging it. You however refused to watch them. And I saw it all just as if I was there." I say coldly to Four.

Eric looks shocked and turned to me with a frown. "Zoe, why didn't you tell me?" His voice soft and worried.

"I did Eric. I told you I didn't blame you. That was only partly why. But it did help to cement it in my mind and to accept he was gone. He didn't want me to always wonder what happened to him. So don't think what you are thinking."

He shook his head and cupped my cheek, stroking it gently. "I still wish you hadn't had to see it."

"I wish it hadn't had to happen. But we both know who we can blame for that. That is what I am concentrated on now. So, if my two trainers would kindly stop contemplating killing each other I would appreciate it. I am also sure my father would really like it if the two boys he loved stopped having pissing contests." My eyes were hard as I looked at Four.

I did have a bit of hard feelings towards Four because he was part of the reason Eric had the reputation he did.

"He's not a nice guy Zoe. I just want to protect you." He spit out.

"Well it's a good thing I am not very nice myself, isn't it? He isn't the only one you could say is capable of cold blooded murder. As you have accused him of repeatedly, even though you knew the basics of what happened that night too because Max told you. You think only men are capable of murder? Well you are wrong. Because I know what being a murderer feels like first fucking hand Four. Of course I was fighting for my own life at that moment. But what does that matter right? I also know you aren't exactly nice either Four. As I have said before, we all have our demons. We all have experienced the sins of the father or in my case mother. Remember that the next time you want to project your own self-loathing on someone else Four. It only turns you bitter in the end. Amar told you this before he died. Maybe you should start listening to him." I whirled on my heel and stalked back to join Tris and Edward leaving them two to work shit out.

The other initiates were slowly making their way in and I saw Peter looking at me. I bit the bullet and went to him and grabbed his sleeve and dragged him away to talk.

"We need to talk Peter."

"Well, that is what I have been saying since yesterday Zoe." He tried to smirk at me.

"Can it Peter. Let's get something straight. Yes I still care for you and love you. I think we both realize though that it was never the kind that makes for lovers. More like we are friends Peter. That was why it was so easy for us to not take that step. Otherwise we would have. We had plenty of opportunity. Tell me I'm wrong." I looked up at him and held his gaze and saw it dawn on him I was telling the truth.

"I wanted it to be more so bad Zoe. You are everything I should want. I just couldn't and it killed me." He ran a hand through his thick brown hair and his green eyes shone with tears.

"You made me a better person Zoe and I didn't feel so much like my father."

"You made you a better person Peter, not me. You just saw the good in yourself when you surrounded yourself with the right people. Unless you do that again..." I look over at Molly and Drew who were sneering over at me "...then it will only get worse for you. Do you want to know why I cut every tie with you instead of working out our friendship? Well you transferred with them. They are going to drag you down here Peter. Because bullying here isn't going to work. It makes you look weak and insecure. You don't have to live up to your father's shadow here. He isn't here and fuck him if he comes for visiting day and starts some shit Peter. He is a twisted fuck of a man who wanted to make you the same. Don't let him win. I can't be friends with you if you go that route Peter. You won't find the person who could love you and give their heart to you if you do either." I finish in a huff.

"Ok, I am done talking about emotions and deep shit for the day!" I yell and throw up my hands. "I need to hit shit or blow shit up." I stalk off only to have my hand caught by Eric and pulled back.

He let go once I stopped and looked at me, his eyes searching mine. "Tonight we can go on the excursion I owe you. I can tell Logan and Milla and maybe we grab that bottle and go to the bridge." His eyes were soft and happy almost.

I smiled at him with a nod. "Sounds good. Now what is on the menu for today?" I motion my head towards the group.

He smirked with a small shrug. "Weapons, should be interesting. I will set you up next to Tris but Four is going to work with you both the most. We have come to an….understanding."

My mouth dropped open and he laughed then closed my jaw for me. "Point Eric, Two. So that makes us what? Eric 2 vs Zoe 1?" He smirked and walked off and pulled me with him by my hand again.

When we got next to Tris and Edward, since the crowd had parted for Eric, he let go and winked down at me then walked up next to Four."

"Alright everyone listen up. Before training begins we are going to tell you how this will all work. The training is four weeks long and in that time you will all be pushed to the brink of your limits on every trait soldiers of Dauntless need. First is the physical where we will push your fitness limits and try to get you up to standard. We will teach you basic fighting moves and you will be fighting against each other in matches." I tensed because I already sensed it coming. Eric nodded at me that he did too.

"Why do we have to fight each other? That is pointless." Al, the big guy from Candor, whined. I had already not liked Al from things I heard from some Candor's but his whining got on my nerves. I felt Tris grab my hand and she looked at me as if to ask is that what you meant. I nodded and squeezed her hand.

Eric walked closer to Al and got in his face. His voice was cold when he spoke "Are you scared to fight someone, of getting hurt or hurting someone else?"

"I don't see what the point of hurting people we are friends with is." He whined again.

"Then maybe you shouldn't have come here. You fight because, one, we tell you to. You fight because they are skills necessary to be a Dauntless. You fight to conquer fear of pain and to learn you can endure. You fight to learn you are more than you are now. If you can't handle that or are afraid, quit now. Don't waste my time because I can promise you, you will not like it when I find a way to make up for that. Got it?"

"Yes." Al whined again.

"Wipe that whine from your voice; address your leader and instructor properly. Yes what initiate?" His voice was like a slice from the scythe from the Grim Reaper.

"Yes sir." Al didn't manage to lose the whine completely but it was better.

Eric stayed looking at him for a moment longer and then looked over the group. "Initiate Tris, would you say fighting is a necessary part of your training to become Dauntless?" He asked without looking her way.

I couldn't help but be proud of how Tris' back went straight and she answered in a firm but respectful tone. "Yes Sir! It will make us stronger and empower us to not fear being hurt. To learn our limits and to learn our enemies weakness."

I smirked at her answer. Four looked at her in surprise and appreciation. I looked over at Eric who was smirking as well.

"Well said Initiate. Does anyone else have any more questions?" He asked in the same steel voice.

"Sir, no Sir" Tris, Edward and I said loudly and everyone belatedly followed along.

Eric walked back up to the front and crossed his arms over his chest. Four continued on. "Also in the first few weeks you will be learning a range of weapons that are used in Dauntless. The last weeks of training you will be pushed to your emotional and mental limits. It is all about limits here, and I can tell you one thing. The only person that truly sets your limits is yourself. You will only do as well as you dedicate yourself to. You put in all your effort or you will not make it here."

"Speaking of making it." Eric started and Four uncovered the ranking board. I squeezed Tris' hand and she squeezed back.

It felt good to have family here and I think she felt the same as she smiled at me then we both schooled our features and faced forward to pay attention.

"This is your life as you know it, very literally. From here on out you will be ranked on everything. And I do mean everything." He said as he glared out at the group and Chris, then on to Peter and his goons. Peter at least looked properly chastised and thoughtful. "This year these rankings will determine who stays and who is cut."

I heard gasps and complaints and both Four and Eric got hard glares that no one was taking their hints. I heard Chris yell "Why weren't we told about this?" in an angry and demanding voice.

Eric smirked at her and it wasn't one of his sexy or good smirks. "Why? Would you have chosen differently? Because to be honest if that is the case then you don't need to be here either. If you really are afraid of being cut then you don't really belong here. What were the words I just heard recently that put it so succinctly? Oh yes and I quote; 'you choose Dauntless…what the fuck did you expect? So as the saying goes, put up or shut up.'"

I saw everyone's heads turn to me. Some people chuckled a bit and others just looked back at the board apprehensively.

Eric walked up to the front and Four was looking at me with his head tilted. He let his schooled features drop and gave me a small smile but then quickly put them back into place.

No one had any more questions about the cuts but Four went on to talk about ranks. "As Eric said ranks will be established from everything we observe about you from the minute you jumped on to that train. You are always being watched so don't think because you are on off hours you are off the hook. Your attitude, how you present yourself as a Dauntless, your skills, ability to listen and follow orders; it is all observed and points are assigned. There are two stages for initiation and at the end of stage one the first cuts will be made. You aren't training with the Dauntless-born but you will be ranked with them. There are 32 total initiates and only 25 spots open. So that means seven of the initiates will be cut. Four will be cut at stage one and three at the end of stage two."

"What happens when they are cut?" Al whined again. I rolled my eyes and surprisingly Tris too.

"Well there is no going home so you would be factionless." Eric said in almost bored tone.

I could read his posture and though his tone was bored I could tell he didn't like this part any more than I did. It was the way the entire system was set up now and had been by all the factions in the beginning.

Dauntless had made cuts before and it went in cycles of when the cuts would be in place or not. Dauntless funding was controlled by the council as a whole and that determined how many new initiates they could take in. Their purse strings were held by all the factions on the council and they couldn't do anything to change it.

When others looked to be about to grumble or object more Four shot them a glare that silenced them all. "Rankings will also determine the jobs you are offered. However I will say this, rank does not mean you will get any specific job. Just because you are rank one does not mean you are cut out for a role in say, leadership. If that is the case you won't be offered it or you could not want it and go for something more suited to you like Instructor. Rank does not equate real worth here. Your skill and character determines that more than anything."

My draw dropped again because Four had just basically apologized and extended an olive branch to Eric. Tris smiled and my jaw snapped back up when Four smirked at me then raised an eyebrow. Even Eric was stunned, if the frown was an indication. He was not going to like that I knew.

Eric schooled his features again and boomed out "Alright enough of this. It's time to jump into training. For the first part of today we will be doing weapons and then after lunch we will move onto the fitness and physical. When we go upstairs to work with the weapons or any time we show you something it would be to your benefit to listen and watch closely. We aren't going to show you again." Four started forward but I held Tris back because Eric signed to stay.

Edward looked back but then nodded to me and walked on. Peter wasn't even paying attention as he was having a conversation with Molly and he looked pissed about something.

"Zoe & Tris, Four and I are going to come down harder on you than the others. One because of the fact that I am not going to hide whatever is between Zoe and I. And two because we are going to expect more from you. He and I are willing to use our own time to do extra training so we aren't going to be very patient if you aren't doing what we feel you are capable of. I hope you both understand this." He said firmly but not unkindly.

We both nodded and intoned "Yes Sir."

"Just call me Eric when we are alone Tris and Zoe you know better." He rolled his eyes at me. "Tris can you go on up. Just follow the sounds of tramping feet down the corridor."

She nodded and gave my hand a squeeze and then a hug and turned and jogged away.

As soon as she was gone Eric stalked up to me and grabbed me in a kiss. I grasped his vest and pulled him closer kissing him fiercely and sucking on his bottom lip.

He was the one to moan into my mouth this time and I smirked into his. Until he grabbed the back of my neck and broke the kiss and started to trail kisses along my neck and at a certain spot when he sucked I was the one moaning and he smirked. He pulled back and looking pleased rubbed the spot on my neck.

"Fuckin hell! You just marked me didn't you?" I clamped a hand to my neck.

He waggled his eyebrows at me. "You called me a caveman. Now you are about to see how much of a caveman I can be."

"I will get my revenge Eric." I promised and grinned at him wickedly.

"I am sure you will try valiantly Zoe" Eric said mockingly.

Something in me snapped because I pulled him to me in for a kiss again and used every skill he had used on me during our kisses. When I felt his breathing get rougher I trailed my hand down his front to cup him through his pants.

I felt him growl and his breathing and heart become erratic and I gave a few small squeezes. I was trying very much to not be totally freaked out by my own actions and his apparent size.

Be brave Zoe.

I worked my way with my mouth to his neck still rubbing and did the same thing he did to me. Then I pulled away in triumph when I left a mark just beside his leadership tattoo on his neck.

When I pulled away totally, I still swayed because kissing him did that regardless. Smirk in place I looked at him and his eyes were dilated in desire and nostrils flared. Damn he was sexy when he looked like that or any way really. But I did that to him so it made it even hotter.

"If we didn't have to be upstairs." He said, pulling me to him and kissing my forehead. "You are so trouble Zoe. Come on, since apparently we are both marked enough for one day. You did mark me didn't you?"

I looked at the hickey and beamed in satisfaction. "Yep that would be my mark on you. Right next to your leadership tattoo on your neck, very visible."

He laughed and grabbed my hand then pulled me along where we sort of jogged a bit to catch up. He was having some trouble with running that I caused him and which he was cursing because of.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Here is the next chapter, hope everyone is enjoying the story so far. I had to break what I had already written up and I hope the breaks in the story are ok. I had originally started to post everything I had written and realized it was over 40k in words. I thought that might be too hefty for a chapter. Just want to give a warning there will be illusions and mentions of sexual violence without the graphic details. So if this is a trigger for you please proceed with caution. I would hate to cause someone emotional pain for a story. Otherwise, I hope everyone likes the new chapter.**

 **Oh, if you don't like Christina or Al bashing there will be plenty in here.**

 **Disclaimer: V Roth still owns the world, or at least this world that I have installed myself in.**

 **Chapter 4**

We got to the door and had caught up with everyone so that I was only steps behind Tris. Four sent us over to a station by each other. Edward was on my left, and then Tris on my right and beside her was Peter. He looked over and gave me a small smile and nod then looked to Tris.

"Umm, Tris." He started and ran a hand through his hair, in what I recognize as one of his nervous gestures "I'm not really good with apologizing. But I am sorry for being a dick. I will try not to be in the future but no promises." He shrugged as if to say that is as good as my apologies get.

She looked at him for a few seconds and then beamed at him. "Apology accepted. I will try to not be such a Stiff." Then she shocked him by winking and turning to me. I just snorted at his look of disbelief. But I also caught the soft smile he sent her way before he cleares his throat and turned away.

"I do believe I am an evil influence on you dear cousin." I say a little quietly. I don't really care who knows but we are waiting for Four to talk.

"No I think you are just the right sort of influence dear cousin." She smiles and bumps her shoulder with mine.

"When did you get all chummy with her?" asks Chris in a super bitchy voice.

I started to count in my mind and closed my eyes. My fists clenched and I tried to tune her out as she repeated the question. Tris wasn't answering either. I was surprised when her hand found mine and she was just as tense as me.

"Initiate! You seem to have some kind of malfunction with that mouth of yours." Four cut into our mutual counting and trying to calm down. "Maybe assigning you a punishment will help to rectify it since you can't seem to do it on your own. Report to control after training. I will have Zeke set you up with some cleaning duties for the next week."

"The next week? That isn't fair I was just asking my friend a question." She spat out and I could see her looking at me with daggers.

I totally gave up trying to refrain from it. I gave in to my urge to shut her up and let her see just how bad I could really get. I tilted my head and gave her a wicked grin. Not one of my good ones either. I saw her shudder and shut up.

"Initiate, since you still can't seem to keep your trap shut, make that two weeks." Four smirked at her and I made my grin just a little bit more evil as my eyes went deadly and hard.

I signed to Eric. 'I so want her during fights'. I was still giving her my grin and saw him nod out of the side of my eye, smirking at her.

Why my glare was affecting her more than two weeks of shit, and I had a feeling it was going to be literally shit, jobs I don't know. Wasn't going to complain though. I could see that even the guy she had been crushing on was looking at her like she was crazy.

After the drama was done Four went to a station near Tris and I. He demonstrated the proper posture, grip, the way to hold the gun to lessen recoil, and then how to sight the gun and fire. I had signed to her to look at his breathing and timing and we watched that.

I was pretty good with the MP5 that we were using but I liked having different perspectives and possible different techniques. The more adaptability I could garner the better I could become.

My father had set up a live rounds room in the huge bunker we had stumbled upon and claimed for ourselves. He had left a few weapons there for me to practice with. If I didn't practice there then I did at the labs where I supplied myself with more ammo.

Once he had demonstrated on the paper targets that were set out we were each instructed on how to load and handle the safety features. We were also told to disassemble and reassemble it a few times too.

Tris and I were sharing our station table and working. I was talking as we were working on practicing loading, unloading, assembling and disassembling. I could do all that in my sleep so my hands were moving on their own though I was trying not to move as quickly as I could. I could tell by her looks at times I went a bit faster. I took a breath and tried to slow myself down causing her to smile at me appreciatively.

"Think of the gun as an extension of you and your will. It will only do what you make it do. Guns don't kill people Tris and unless you are actually meaning to end a life you don't have to. Not to say you won't need to if the time comes for it. But don't let the fact that it can end a life intimidate you. Sickness ends life. A fucking stiletto heel can end a life." I muttered angrily and slammed the ammo mag into place. "You don't have to have any weapon used on you to die and certainly not to kill. So don't be scared of it or it will control you." I finished and noticed Edward smile at me.

"I guess you could also say it would be selfish of me to not learn how to properly use it because it can be used in the service of others." She smiled at me.

"You are catching on Cousin." I smiled.

A voice almost caused us both to jump. "Good! Because I would like you both to now demonstrate that fine lesson." Eric's voice boomed out loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Sir, Yes Sir" Tris said and raised the weapon.

"Yes Eric." I said and raised mine and felt his breath on my neck.

"Good girl." He whispered and I heard the smirk in his voice.

I looked at where I wanted to aim. I closed my eyes and inhaled. Then opened them and breathed out while squeezing the trigger. I hit just a hair above the bullseye. It was still technically in the center but I pouted.

"Dammit! Fucking wind shear son of bitch! Suck on big hairy donkey balls." I cursed out and repeated the process as I accounted for the wind moving my tiny ass. When I fired this time I hit dead center.

I heard chuckling from behind me. "Would anyone care to tell me why she didn't make dead center the first time?" Four asked loudly.

"What do you mean? She hit in the center." Molly asked dumbly.

"Really? So you are saying both Eric and I are wrong and she did hit dead center?" Four asked menacingly.

"Sir, no Sir!" She intoned realizing her mistake. At least she wasn't completely dumb.

Eric sighed still a bit amused. "Zoe, would you care to elaborate on your extremely inventive and colorful exclamation of why you didn't hit dead center?"

"I forgot to account for the wind and its effects on my frame or on the bullets travel distance. There is a natural amount of drift when any weapon is fired because of recoil but other factors are wind. It can slow the bullet or alter the course so you have to know where the wind is coming from and roughly how fast then try to account from that. It is a process normally called dialing it in." I finish sounding like I just regurgitated a book. I smacked my mouth as if I had a bad taste in it and made a gagging noise.

"I hate sounding like I just vomited a book." I grouched lowly. Tris bites her lip to keep from laughing as does Edward and Peter. Four has his head tilted again and Eric is smirking.

Ok Mr. Smirks-a-lot you can cut that out now; I think sourly. You would think he was personally responsible for my knowledge. Well he did have some influence not that he remembers.

"I want everyone to get started and try to hit the center. Try using the example Four provided as well Zoe." Eric yelled. "Is that understood?"

"Sir, Yes Sir" They intoned.

"Sir, Yes Eric, Sir" I intoned cheekily at the same time. He quirked an eyebrow at me then shook his head and grinned.

We all lifted our rifles and started to fire again. I tried to group them all one on top of each other and was fairly successful, they all ended up in the dead center. I looked as I was firing and saw that Tris was hitting in the center as well.

Once all my shots had been used in the magazine I reached down for the next magazine and loaded it. I went to semi-automatic and changed my posture to account for the extra recoil the rapid fire bursts would cause, it let the bursts come in 3's.

I got my sites again, closed my eyes, opened and fired in short controlled bursts; accounting for drift through each burst. The MP5 had a fairly good recoil mitigation but it still had to be accounted for especially in a burst mode. My goal was to shoot out the center circle with the magazine available. When the magazine emptied I had all but a small section of the center gone.

"Now you are just showing off Z." Edward muttered and I was startled out of my concentration.

"Huh?" I asked looking around confused and saw everyone looking at me. "Why is everyone looking at me?" I looked over at Tris and she pointed at the target.

"I know I didn't get it all." I shrugged and started to load another magazine but was stopped by a hand on my shoulder. I turned to look back and saw Four looking me and shaking his head.

"We are going to try something different with you. I am going to load more targets but you need to go follow Eric." He indicated with his head but I looked to Tris and she nodded.

"The rest aren't ready for controlled bursts yet Zoe. Tris is doing perfect. Go ahead." He gave me a reassuring look and I nodded.

"Yes Sir." I walked off to follow Eric back down the stairs.

"You went too fast Zoe. Not that it's a bad thing but you have to pace yourself if you want to be able to be with Tris through it." He said as he put his hand on the small of my back as we walked.

"Sorry, I guess I wasn't thinking about that." I mumbled.

"Hey." He stopped me and looked at me seriously. "I said it wasn't a bad thing. We just have to move you on sooner. I had already half expected something like this when Logan and I heard about you being in live rounds labs. Honestly though that doesn't explain the accuracy. I am guessing Amar worked with you?"

"Yeah. In our bunker he set up our own firing range in one of the rooms. It was basically like our own mini Dauntless. We even have a gym and sparring area. I would sneak ammo out of the lab to restock myself after he passed. It helped when I couldn't sleep at night to step from my room there and to train." I frowned. I couldn't say that he had been there too. I shook my head and looked back at him.

He sighed and had me start walking again and he held my hand as we walked. "You lived there after he was gone?"

"Yes and a bit when he was alive too. More after he died because Jeanine got bad, really bad. If I didn't go to my adoptive parents then she couldn't get access to me" I shrug.

"I guess at least you had somewhere to go. I wish he had been able to tell one of us about you so we could check on you. Is this where you keep your stuff like the bungee cords?" He asked softly as we headed into a weapons locker area and he unlocked it taking out a sniper rifle then scope.

My eyes lit up at the weapon and I was almost bouncing. "Bolt or Semi?" I asked grinning at it and started to rock back and forth on my feet.

He sighed and then laughed, shaking his head. "Answer my question first." He hid the weapon behind his back and I had to think back to what the question was.

"Huh? Oh yeah. When we found the bunker it had apparently been set by some adrenaline junkies. I even have two restored dirt bikes. Well I had to restore them. I had to find a way to get them out and finally found a lift entrance that I guess they rode vehicles out of it" I replied. "Bolt or Semi?" I quirked an eyebrow at him and tried to look around his back at the gun.

"Have you had experience with either?" He laughed at the face I was making.

"No, I couldn't get a hold of one" I pouted and he pulled me in as kissed me briefly.

"Bolt. we are going to start you out on that and go from there." He snapped the scope into place and handed me a small box of the 7.62×51mm rounds. He carried it and we headed to another part of the compound and his tablet went off.

"Hold this Zoe." He handed me the rifle and I grinned even bigger. I made sure to hold it properly and double checked it was on safety. He typed something in and then looked at me smiling. "I'm not getting that back am I?"

I quirked an eyebrow at him in a man that let him know that was a stupid question. "You handed it to me, it's mine now." I shrugged and he laughed causing people to look at him. They then saw the sniper rifle in my hands and I heard chuckles along with whispered conversations.

"Come on. Four should have the targets in place." He put a hand on my back again and guided me to the next roof.

We came out and Zeke was there with Logan. "Ok guys. Let her use the rounds she has for the first set of 3 targets. Then move on to the next roof and I will have the next 3 targets set up. We can go from there if we decide to do more."

He looked at me and cupped my cheek. "Just remember what you already know about wind shear and dialing it in. Take your time with the shots and try not to put more than one bullet into each. If it takes more than one at first that's fine. Logan and Zeke are going to be also having you traverse the roofs. Do you know how to do that?" He looked at me worried.

"Parkour? Yeah, Dad had me do it with him as part of our competitions. Roofs were the best place to do it but also wrecked buildings." I smiled at him.

"I shouldn't be surprised." He grinned at me and leaned down to kiss me. "See you at the next roof then." He said as he pulled away and I got dizzy again and he steadied me then smirked at me.

"Mr. Smirks-O-Lot." I grumbled and Logan barked in laughter and Eric quirked an eyebrow at me.

"I can still toss you over my shoulder and take away the shiny new toy Zoe." I blanched at the thought of him taking the pretty gun away.

"Nope! I take it back! You smirk just enough. Don't want to be late do you?" I start shoving him to the stairs and he laughs but doesn't move an inch. I heard Zeke and Logan chuckling behind me.

"That's what I thought you would say" He smirked again and walked away. I turned to Logan and Zeke with a wicked grin.

"Shall we play guys? I have bullets burning a hole in my pocket." Logan laughed and walked me over to the station they got set up for me.

There was a table and a chair for me to sit in and a stand for the rifle to rest in to stabilize the shots. "Have you used a sniper rifle before Zoe?" Logan asked.

"No. I have used bolt guns but not in sniper variety. What kind of kickback can I expect? What is the effective range for this model?"

"This is a M40 and is about 800m. The first shots are at about 100 - 300m and the recoil is going to be significant so be sure to brace even if you are sitting down. Go ahead and set up your station. We have binoculars to help you dial it in if needed. We aren't expecting you to get it dead center on first go but try and get as close as you can." He patted my back and Zeke was signaling the other roof with light signals using a mirror. I smiled when I saw the flashes back.

"Tell Four I said to hold his horses already." I smirked at the disbelief on Zeke's face.

"You are scary sometimes Zoe." He muttered and signaled back.

I put the gun in the cradle, sat and braced properly against the weapon then adjusted my feet until I felt secure. I took the cover off the box of ammo and put three between my knuckles to hold on to after I slide one into the chamber. I closed my eyes and sat feeling for the wind picking up to see how fast it was coming and from what direction.

"Wind is coming in from North West at no more than 5 maybe six miles per hour. Not enough to push off course too much for a 100m shot. Sun is behind us so glare shouldn't be a problem." I stated.

"Why do you have your eyes closed Zoe" Zeke asked.

"I am saving my sight eye." I replied with my eyes still closed.

"Good thinking." Logan replied.

I reached forward and slid off the scope cap. I pressed my eye into place and opened my eye on the scope then looked through at the first target. When I got my sight to just above the center, I clicked the safety and inhaled. I exhaled and squeezed the trigger firmly but not too fast.

"Damn close Zoe. Damn close" Logan called it. "It was just a bit high and to the left. You accounted for too much of the wind affecting you."

I waited for Zeke to be signaled to confirm the shot "Four confirms. Go ahead and take the same target again."

"Yes Sir." I made the minute adjustment, or as much as I could. When you are shaving centimeters off it is easier to go overboard than too little. I had clicked the safety on after my last shot and clicked it back off now that I was firing again. I inhaled and fired on my exhale.

I clicked the safety back on and smiled down at the target. "That looked like I got it that time. What does Four say?" I asked as I kept my eye on the scope just in case I needed to go again.

"He says it is dead on center, no drift. Good job. Now go for the 200m target shot. Remember wind could account a bit more the higher we go." Logan said from beside me.

"Roger that." I replied quietly and frowned as I looked down range for the next target. I made the adjustments to the scope to change the meters. I made sure to keep it braced and changed my breathing to exhale slower but keep the trigger squeeze the same after I realized that it had been moving my body too much during the last shots. I fired and clicked the safety on.

"Hot damn first try. What did you different there, Zoe, than you did last time? I know already but I want to make sure you do and it wasn't a fluke." Logan asked me and I took my eye off the scope to look at him.

"When I was off a miniscule amount I was trying to figure out how I could have avoided it. It wasn't that I exhaled but the speed that I did so. I slowed my exhale so it caused as little chest movement but kept the same pressure on the squeeze." I replied thoughtfully.

"Exactly. Wind and sun are factors but also breathing." He smiled at me. "One last target. Try and combine it all together for this longer one."

I smiled slightly and nodded, not wanting to get cocky. I still had at least this one and the next roof. I would also have to run and leap across roofs to get to the next one which would change my breathing automatically. Which is what I was thinking they were going for.

I closed my eyes for several seconds and pressed my eye to the scope. I changed the scope to 300m and made adjustments. I clicked my safety off and followed the same breathing changes I made and fired.

I clicked the safety back on. "I am not sure about that one. It seems at least very close but I think to the right."

"Four confirms that, good eye. Try again. You really are doing well." Zeke calls out.

"Roger." I had again over calculated for wind anticipating it to pick up as it was further out. I went back by half on my adjustment and clicked the safety off. I inhaled much slower and exhaled just as slowly then squeezed and fired. I clicked my safety back on and kept looking downrange. "Still not sure about that."

"It's a good shot Zoe, right on. Let's just wait for Four to confirm since he can walk up to it." Logan stated and I nodded.

Logan clapped my back when we all got the signal of dead on. I grinned from ear to ear.

"Five bullets for three long range targets and first time on a sniper rifle is really good Zoe. Ok, pack up the gun and cradle in this as well as the ammo. Then strap it onto your back as tight as you can. You might want to go from one shoulder down to the opposite hip." Logan handed me the bag and I closed the scope cap and double checked the safety.

I mused that holding the 3 bullets in between the knuckles had worked well for easier reload. So I would be doing that again for the next roof. I frowned, speaking of bullets.

"Do I pick up spent casings?" I asked looking around.

"Not for this. But if you were actually being activated as a sniper then yes it would be protocol." Logan smiled at me. "You are a natural Zoe."

I smile back, shaking my head. "Don't get cocky on me kid..." I quote a favorite movie and Logan laughs out loud.

"Okay Solo, let's head out." He said as we took off running and jumped down to the next level. We leaped across to the next lower level and had to vault up onto the next one. We did that four more times along with leaping across alleyways and I couldn't help my grin. I still tried to regulate my breathing but if I was being honest there was no way to do that well with the extreme jumps. I would have to do that once I got set up.

"The set up on these is 400m – 600m. Remember wind will play a bit more here and from a new direction" Logan didn't seem to be winded at all.

I started regulating breathing as I set up. Once I had the cradle unpacked I put the rifle in its home and opened the ammo box. I used the same set up in between my knuckles.

I closed my eyes and felt for the wind again. It was a bit faster but from the same direction. The sun was just off my left shoulder but still behind me. I relayed all this to Logan and Zeke then pressed my eye to the scope and uncapped it.

I made my adjustments after I set the scope dial to find the target. I took a few more seconds to breathe deep in and out slowly trying to get my heart rate under control.

"Walk me through what you are doing there." Logan asked.

"I am trying to steady my heart rate so the pounding doesn't affect my body movement or vision." I replied as I had finally restored the heart rate I needed.

"Good. Just remember you don't want to take too long if you were out in the field but that is the correct thing to do. Fire when ready." I could hear the smile in his voice.

I repeated all the same steps as before but because the wind was the same speed and direction I didn't make near as steep an adjustment for it. Although I had a thought about the bullets trajectory making its own wind. I fired and clicked on the safety. I smiled because my calculations paid off and I saw dead center.

"Fuck that was beautiful!" Zeke yelled out.

"Damn! First shot. You just might beat me Zoe." Logan sounded concerned.

"Don't jinx it Sir."

"Call me Logan, Zoe. You earned it today even if I didn't want you to call me Sir anyways. Ok next target is different. This is a mannequin. Eric wants it between the eyes. Next one will be the heart so sighting will be different."

I changed the range to the next 500m then changed my posture up a bit. I made adjustments for the new target area and did the same breathing slowly in and out. I squeezed and fired. I clicked on the safety and looked through the scope. "Too low, or lower than it should be. Is that what you are seeing?"

Logan must have been looking to get a confirmation. "I actually am not seeing that but let us wait for Eric to confirm or not."

"Roger." I said simply.

I heard him using his phone. "Well shit. You are so going to cost me 100 credits Zoe." He growled.

"Umm….sorry? Sorry not sorry? What's the appropriate response here?" I smirk.

"And you call Eric Mr. Smirks-o-lot" He laughs. "Move on to the next target and then we can head back to the others."

I adjust the scope for the new range and locate the next mannequin. There is an actual heart imprint on the mannequin. I make the adjustments after I recalculate the wind that just went still. My palms are sweaty on this one for some reason.

I click the safety off and steady my breathing then pause. I don't like my adjustments so I click the safety back on. "I don't like my wind calculations from when it dropped off. Readjusting now to account for a third of the wind."

"Why a third?" Zeke asked.

"Just because there is no wind blowing, doesn't mean the speed of the bullet's path at such a range won't stir up some or still provide resistance." At least that is what my instinct is telling me anyways.

"Go ahead then Zoe. It's a good theory." Logan encouraged and I clicked safety off. I followed the same procedure and fired."

"Well there go those credits." He grumbled

I clicked safety back on, flipped the cap on the scope and pulled back grinning again.

Zeke grabbed me up and spun me around laughing. "You set a new record Zoe!" He put me down and it was Logan's turn.

"What do you mean?" I ask laughing after they had set me back down. I started packing everything up without being told to.

"Logan was the last initiate to get to the sniper rifle and at the same distance you did. He worked his way to the sniper on the third day instead of your one and you did it in fewer bullets by half." He grinned at me.

"Wow, pretty cool!" I smiled and was about to strap the bag on again but Logan took it.

"We'll take the stairs and join the others in the training room. Eric said they all just went down there. They watched those last shots." Logan said.

"Oh ok" I shrugged "This was pretty challenging and fun. What happens after this though since I skipped over a stage with the gun?" I asked as we walked down the stairs and through corridors.

"It will depend on Four and Eric. They might clear something through Max or they might get you to do pistols just to make sure you do have that down. It just really depends on how much or little they want to separate you from the rest of the initiates in the firearms portion. I can say for me, I bypassed pistols after the same rifle you were on. I went to sniper and went to the semi-automatic instead of going further out on the bolt. I had different instructors though." He eyed me from the side and I frowned looking down.

"Who were your instructors?" I asked causally.

"Max and Amar." He replied a little too casually as he looked at me again.

I nod and smile sadly. "They must have been proud you accomplished that."

He smiled sadly too. "I can only hope. They both mean a lot to me. Amar did especially. He was a good man."

"The best." I whispered lowly and looked to the ground. I had a feeling Logan knew just who I was besides Jeanine's kid.

We made our way down the corridor and I was swept up in Eric's big arms before I could even register what was happening. He held me lifted up by my waist and kissed me deeply. I heard Logan laugh as he and Zeke passed us by.

Eric broke the kiss and was grinning at me. "I had to do that before we went in there. That was amazing. I was worried about the roof running, but when I saw you vaulting across everything it was beautiful. Logan said you are a natural and that is saying something because that is his main role in the field."

I smiled showing my dimples. "It was challenging. I had to keep calculating and recalculating. The last one I almost went with no adjustment for wind because it dropped off completely. At the last second I didn't feel comfortable with that and went with a third."

He nodded and smiled down at me then sighed. "Come on. We are going to do a mock debriefing to give the others a look at what an OP like that would look like in the field. Zeke and Logan are going to help you but you are going to need to give your observations as well. Oh, and don't panic but the dauntless-born are here too along with Max. They saw the shots on the first roof and then both dauntless-born and transfers saw the last."

"Yeah, no pressure at all" I mutter sarcastically. He grins with a wink and pushes me in.

It's kind of quiet when I come in at first and then all the dauntless-born, Tris, Edward, Peter, Will and Al all applaud me. To which I blush and go to the front where I am being motioned to. I stand beside Logan and Zeke who are beaming at me.

Eric comes up to the front and stands beside Max. "Alright everyone, listen up!" He yells to quiet them. "Max will say a few words about what we saw today and then Logan, Zeke and Zoe will give an example of a debriefing report. If this were a real field OP you would need to account for all movements. They are all also going to give information on the events themselves so maybe you can learn from them. Pay attention because we won't explain this shit again." He growled looking a bit disgruntled at a few of the initiates and I frowned wondering that that was about.

Max looked over at me and smiled warmly. "Today we all witnessed a new record being set by any initiate to date in progressing from the starting firearms. Not only was it the fastest in days of weapon progression but it was done with least number of tries and in the fastest time. The previous record holder was none other than one of your leaders Logan, who was on the roof today with Zoe to assist and monitor. He moved from the guns you were all firing on by the third day of training and went straight into the same gun she was using today. His time was only slightly more than hers but she took only half as many shots to get exactly where they were called for."

Max looked to me and smiled sadly before he started to speak again. "The initiate before this that held the honor she now bears was a former Instructor and someone who was a personal friend. Amar Salvador also progressed after the third day but by 15 minutes more than either of them and the same amount of shots were required as Zoe. This is a very high distinction and will play heavily into her points for this set of skills."

My breath caught in my throat and I felt Logan discreetly pat my back. I looked up to him and he smiled at me then nodded. Now I knew for sure that he knew exactly who I was. I was torn standing here. Part of me was pleased I was sharing something with my father. The other part of me was hurting because he couldn't be here with the people who meant so much to him to celebrate in his daughter's accomplishments. I hurt for him more than myself.

My musings were broken as Max continued and his tone changed to a harder tone. "I know you have all been told this but you are watched very closely. You will get no rankings or points that you do not earn yourself. I know there was great disagreement among the initiates about the cuts this year and let me say this. If you think you can advance yourself by attacking another initiate be they dauntless-born or transfer, think again. You will be made factionless immediately. I review all points and rankings, as do all the other leaders. No one will be awarded points unfairly no matter the relation to any of the Instructors or Leaders.

He paused and his eyes turned hard in the way only a man with great power could. "So, if I hear one more word…" his voice turned colder than even Eric's voice was capable of "...of favoritism. Then I will hold that person or persons as being insubordinate and appropriate action will be taken. Have I made myself clear?"

"Sir, yes Sir!" We all intone.

He nods and motions for Logan to begin. "Today Zoe demonstrated the ability to not only properly handle the assault rifle. But to quickly make adjustments when firing that rifle in controlled bursts enough that her groupings were so tightly gathered she obliterated the center of the target. Had she only done tight groupings in the center of the target she still would have progressed." He paused and looked around to the group.

"While the targets for the sniper rifle were being set up, a demonstration of the feat she performed was made to both training groups to show the level of skill it takes to make that happen. Four and Eric both went to each respective roof and demonstrated how much precision is needed to shoot out the entire center target. And as you all saw it takes a great deal of skill." I frowned because that was news to me that they did that. Tris smiled at me and barely nodded her head at me causing me to blush even more. I hate attention.

"The ranges for the targets on the first roof were the lowest. 100m, 200m, and 300m. She was provided with a bolt action sniper rifle. The same model I was given and a cradle to seat the gun into. She was made to simulate an environment that a sniper might face. In this case on both roofs, the gun was set up on a table and she was seated in a chair. Let me tell you right now, that is not as easy as it sounds. You still have to maintain the proper posture regardless if you are in a chair or not." Here he turned to look at me.

"What were the difficulties with being seated as opposed to standing Zoe?"

I thought for a moment over my first shots. "When you are standing, you can provide yourself more traction because it is easier with the correct spacing of your feet in proportion to your shoulders and hips. Sitting you have to adjust and account for the force you will be sent back on the top half that you cannot make up for with that traction the standing position provides."

I mimic a standing posture. "When the recoil happens standing, if you are standing properly you will barely feel it. But sitting and using the cradle you have to hunch a bit. Still remembering to anchor your feet and the recoil angle changes because the angle of your body is forced into a different position. My frame is different than say Instructor Four's so each calculation must be tailor made to each person." I finish shrugging.

"She is dead on with that and she was able to get that correct from the first second with no input or corrections from either myself or Zeke. Now let's move onto something else that both Zeke and I noticed that even I had never thought to do. Zoe, how did you arrange your ammo for ease of use, in the absence of an ammo belt with built in places for each round?"

Zeke was holding out the opened ammo box. I took three rounds and placed them between the knuckles of a finger but with a space between.

"I didn't want to keep reaching into the box because I might lose seconds getting another one or might fumble with the rounds. I also didn't want to hold them in a clenched fist and this allowed to me to grip as tightly as I could but still left both hands free for me to handle the weapon."

I looked over and saw Four had set up a table. He had the gun in the cradle and had apparently been demonstrating each thing we discussed. He did so now with the ammo. "Very good thinking Zoe. I am able to still hold, position my rifle and operate the trigger but also the bolt action for each new round." He nodded.

I nodded back at him unsure what I was supposed to say and still blushing.

Logan picked back up. "Next thing on the list. Accounting for external forces on the accuracy and speed of your shot. This happens more with the longer range shots than the closer range ones. Even in your weapons practice today you experienced some of this. For girls that have more petite frames strong winds can be a factor. Wind is a factor almost always. The only one that does not experience any kind of wind interference is point blank range. How do you determine these factors? It goes by instinct, constantly recalculating to account for where it might be coming from and how fast and then at times trial and error. When we say dial it in, that is what that means. To dial it in is to fine tune it until you are left with zero margin of error"

He smirked down at the group and said proudly. "She took one dial in shot on her first target. One guys! I took three."

Zeke took over after that. "She also had a unique method of determining the possible interferences. Immediately after setting up and getting her posture at least adjusted she looked for the suns positioning. Sun or lights of any kind can interfere with a shot. The sun stayed pretty consistently behind us but when we moved to another roof she still reevaluated it. The second thing was, she closed her eyes and kept them closed to save her scope eye. Meaning when she opened her eye it was already looking through the scope and minimized her eyes adjustment to zero. That was a new one for both Logan and I as well. Lastly, when she closed her eyes, she used her senses fully to determine what direction the wind was coming from and how fast. She didn't have any distractions visually to hinder her."

"Now for the first shots themselves." Logan continued and the board was uncovered to show my targets. "As you can see the first shot is labeled. She hit just a bit high and to the left. She accounted for too much wind but halved that and as you see on her next shot it was dead center. That was at the 100m mark."

"The next target it was set up at 200m and she hit it dead center on the first try. Zoe, tell them what change you made from the first to the next that you pointed out to ME you did" He turned to me and asked.

"When my first shot had been off by such a miniscule amount I replayed my shots in my mind. Wind did play a factor but my breathing was the biggest culprit. I had taken too large of a breath in and let out too large of a breath. It moved my chest more than was necessary and throwing the shot off by the centimeters it was off. I instead inhaled slower and released just as slowly. Preventing my chest and shoulders from moving more than was needed." I finished.

Logan nodded and pointed to me with a smug look. "I had her tell me what that change was on her own. I had noticed the difference because I was watching for how quick she was to grasp what needed to be done to make the shots the first time. The last shot." The target was brought up again.

"This one was at 300m and it took her only two shots to get it center. What got her the most points on this target was because she was able to call her miss and how she missed it before Four or I did. You see she was still just barely off but she called it out to us and told us it was off further to the right. Because of that she was able to adjust accordingly and made the shot the second time." He nodded to Zeke after he finished.

Zeke took over again. "In a field OP how you get to your position is as much a part of OP as the skill with the weapon itself. For this, Zoe was made to pack and stow her own weapon then carry it on her back as she traversed across the rooftops by running, leaping across alleyways and onto the next roofs to fire. Five roofs overall and not once stopping. She had to keep pace with us. Then she was made to set it all up on her own again. Keep that in mind when thinking about how difficult this all was. A first day initiate was made to jump and run over roofs carrying her own weapon and was expected to keep up with experienced field agents. She did that and more." He grinned at me briefly. I saw some of the initiates blanch at the thought of running and jumping from roofs.

Zeke went back into his professional mode and continued. "She repeated the same things as before in ascertaining the wind, sun and proper posture. The added thing she had to deal with was heart rate and breathing. She instantly did the determination of wind, keeping her scope eye ready and lowered her heart rate quickly and efficiently. As with the breathing importance she learned previously, she instantly recognized it and took action. Had she not done so, it could have messed up her shots and cost seconds if not the target objective completely. Remember a sniper's biggest weapon is the element of surprise. Once a shot is fired, it can't be taken back and that element is gone. The target has a chance to defend or vacate and we might lose the objective."

Logan nodded and beamed as the last three targets were shown one by one, even the mannequins. "As you can see every one of her shots after were dead on targets on the first time. These were the longest shots of the day at 400m, 500m and 600m. Not only that but the last two were completely different. Because, whereas before she was aiming for the center of a clearly marked target, in these she was given the objective of a direct hit between the eyes and then the heart."

He pointed to the mannequin where I had to aim for the heart and was grinning, shaking his head in wonder. "They were beautiful shots and this last one, the heart one, is made even more amazing because she held her shot when she realized she was miscalculating."

He looked over at me and shook his head and grinned. "I couldn't even tell her that she was miscalculating, because honestly I would have told her she had it right the first time. Zoe, please tell us why you changed your adjustments for the wind."

"During the sighting of the last target the wind dropped to practically zero. At first I calculated for that and almost fired but it didn't feel right. I adjusted the calculation to a third because I accounted for the lengthier distance and friction the speeding bullet would naturally create as it spun its way towards the target. Basically I accounted for the wind its own path would create." I shrugged.

"As you can all see, she got it dead in the center of the heart imprint. We would have taken anywhere in that heart but she got it dead center." Logan looked at me smirking at me and I blushed and looked down.

Max came over and shook my hand and slipped something in it. I closed my hand and put both into the pockets of my jacket blush still in place and looked at my feet.

"In a debriefing you will have to account for every shot you take or didn't take. You will have to tell us if you met your objectives and why you didn't. You will be held accountable for every action you take and we will not hold your hand to walk you through any of these steps. We show you once, we tell you once and you are expected to pay attention." Eric said in his emotionless voice.

"Everyone head to lunch except for Edward, Peter and Zoe." Eric barked out and I frowned.

I stayed where I was and I saw Tris sign me she would save me a seat with Lauren and my three other friends. I nodded and signed back thanks and I would join them as soon as I could. I turned to see all the present leaders, Four, Zeke and Lauren looking at me.

"Was she just doing military signing?" Zeke asked.

"A form of it yes. But you can speak entire sentences in just a few hand signals." Eric grinned at me. "She probably knows the military hand signals too, don't you Zoe?"

I frown and blush. "So does Edward." I growled and they all laughed.

Four turned to Peter and Edward. "Tomorrow you two will move to the semi-automatic controlled bursts of the rifles you worked with. So first thing you are to meet Zeke here in this training room and you will be taken to a different roof from either group. If you do well you will move on to moving targets for each way. You didn't have consistent enough center groupings to move beyond this weapon as of yet. You two may go now to lunch."

"Sir, yes Sir" They both intoned and left with Edward frowning worriedly at me but he kept going. Once they were out of the room the others turned back to me.

"Zoe we are going to be asking Logan and Eric to take you out tomorrow and do longer range sniper rifles." Four said. My eyes lit up and I grinned.

"Fifty cals?" I asked hopefully. Logan and Eric smirked at me.

"Told you she would not only figure it out but ask for it. Yes, normally we move you to the smaller sniper rifles of the semi-automatic variety. THen maybe even moving targets. But with the time, number of shots taken and stellar accuracy you had today, we feel we can at the very least test you. If need be we can take you back to the semi-automatic. You will be leaving a bit earlier instead of at 8 am because you have to go to the area where live explosive rounds are detonated. The targets will be rigged to explode when struck accurately." Eric said, grinning at me proudly.

I started rocking back and forth on my feet in excitement without me knowing it. "I appreciate it Sir's, Ma'am. And I will promise to not waste this opportunity." I tried to say calmly but know I failed by the chuckles.

"We know you won't or we wouldn't be offering it to you." Max grinned at me."I am going to head on up to my office and have lunch at my desk while I try and get ahead on some paperwork. Thank you all for today." He nodded and walked off.

"Can I yell now? Cause it is killing me to hold it in." I grin at everyone left.

"Yes you may yell." Lauren booty bumps me.

"I GET TO BLOW SHIT UP!" I collapse on the ground. "I have officially had the best day in almost two years." I sigh "I wish…." I do my martial arts pop up and Four's jaw drops. Which I only notice because Lauren laughs and pushes it back in place.

Eric looks at me sadly knowing what I was wishing. "I wish too. He would be over the moon right now."

I nod with a sigh. "Well, I worked up an appetite. I don't know about anyone else. Shall we go to lunch? Oh wait! What was all that about favoritism?" I frowned and Eric and Four's look turned dark and scary. "A certain Candor female I have requested the honor of facing in the fights?"

"Yes, and you will be getting that honor. Just shove it in her face and make her eat her words." Four growled out.

And Eric tilted his head and chuckled. "Who would have fucking thought it Four. We have agreed no less than five times in a single day. That has to be five times more than we ever have."

I smiled at both of them a little cheekily. "Good! Then I won't have to kick either of your asses for forgetting who you were both important too. Now before I get tossed over someone's shoulder, I am going to .." I take off running out of the training room and hear footsteps come up fast behind me and then tackle me to the ground, but rolling so he lands with himself under me. "Dammit no fair you have longer legs!" I squeal as he starts to tickle me right there in the hallway.

"Say you're sorry and I will let you up." He locked me in a hold and wouldn't let me go.

"Do you WANT me to lie to you? I thought we already established you would call me on that." I say laughing.

"Fine. Say that I am far superior to you in brute strength and handsomeness"

"You are a far superior brute in handsomeness" I sigh out dramatically.

"Close enough. I will let you slide this time." He grins and sits up easily lifting me with him when he stands then setting me on my feet.

"You guys done now? Because I really am hungry." Lauren smiles at me as she dusts my clothes off for me.

I nod and Eric rolls his eyes. "I guess I am supposed to sit with you guys again? What will become of my reputation?"

I elbow him. "Don't talk about my sister like that." He just shakes his head grabs my hand and we walk to the dining hall.

Logan hands me over a bag. "You and Tris requested protein stuff, here it is. Drink the shake in the morning along with your breakfast and before your workout. Eat a bar after the workout and if you do any after dinner training follow it up with another powder. They only had vanilla so that was all I could get for the powder but the bars have different flavors."

"Amazing! Thanks. These will really help her pretty quickly too." I smile in thanks to both Eric and Logan.

"Just be sure to keep drinking water too." Lauren warns and I nod.

"Well, unless of course it's ass early in the morning then I prefer my water black….with coffee grounds. I really feel bad for everyone the night/morning of capture." I shrug.

"Oh good gods I did not think of that. Should I just prepare ahead of time and fill a big thermos for you?" Lauren's eyes get wide.

"Unless you just want someone to get a neuro stim to the dick. Then by all means don't." All four guys stop for a moment and wince.

"Did you really do that Zoe?" Four asked in disbelief.

"Hell yeah I did and for a lot less then my coffee addiction. Edward couldn't sit down for a damn day." I grinned and Lauren dragged me forward as all the guys couldn't walk at that moment.

"I think you broke them." She whispered.

"No breaking them would have been to mention that he also happened to turn away from me and I got him in his anus too…well as close as I could get through his pants." I smirk and she laughs loudly.

"Do we want to know?" Logan asks behind us.

"Probably not, she had that wicked sounding voice of hers" Eric has a smirk in his voice.

"Back at you babe" I call out loudly to him.

Lauren and I walked on arm in arm to the dining hall smiling and laughing a bit.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: (Edit for grammar and other annoying things) I hope the last chapter was a good stopping point and I hope everyone enjoys this next installments. Thanks so much for all the reviews, follows and reads. I love being able to share in our mutual love for Divergent and stories in general.**

 **Disclaimer: Roth is the still the master of the universe and I am just a girl in a blue police box playing in it.**

 **Zoe**

 **Chapter 5**

 _Zoe_

"So when are we going am I taking you girls to the club?" Lauren asks as we walk into the dining hall and get in line.

"You are going where?" Eric asks from right behind me with his arms crossed over his chest eyebrow raised.

"Is it customary for big sisters to rat out little sisters Lauren? Cause if so you could have told me beforehand?" I frown at Lauren.

She covers her mouth, shaking her head before speaking. "I am so sorry Zoe." She gives Eric a worried frown. "She's only doing it to help Tris. Something about combat and dancing linked to primal instincts. That it will empower her and let her become comfortable in her body. That was it right?" She looks at me with her brows furrowed in worry.

"Yes actually that is the only reason I need to take her before next week at least." I laugh at her expression. I shrug at the looks of disbelief from the others. "It really works. My dad knew I started to sneak off to raves and when he saw my self-esteem improving and my fighting he asked me about it."

"So I told him how it felt when I started going to dance. Before then I didn't feel in control of my body at all or that I was in touch with how I could make things work for me. You can read all the books in the world, watch all the vid files in the world about fighting and it won't work the same as the next person reading or watching. I had to find my own rhythm and my fighting style. Once I found the first the second followed. And it is always changing because I am always changing. We learn and keep learning as we get older. We get better with age not worse." I shrug and I feel Eric pull me against his chest and kiss the top of my head.

Lauren, Logan and Four are all quiet and then Four looks at me with a look of wonder and realization. "She's fucking right."

I feel Eric's chest rumble behind me. "Just realizing that? I had that same conversation with myself last night when she first mentioned her theory to Tris. Although she had a hell of a lot more to say just then as opposed to last night."

I shrug "I guess I just feel like waxing poetic."

I am distracted when I see what they have for lunch. "Oh look, grilled chicken teriyaki! Hmm, wonder if they have wasabi? Yep! Got it" I spoon a dollop onto my plate and move on to the grilled veggies, and brown rice and grab fruit instead of a real dessert.

"What no chocolate and hot sauce?" Eric asks.

"Nope, training I stick to leaner foods when I do heavier training." I shrug and move along and grab water and a large cup with milk to combine the protein powder in for Tris and me both.

I look around for Tris and see Lauren already making her way over and sitting beside Milla. Lauren shoos off all other people at the table besides Uri, Mar, Lynn, Zeke, Tris, Milla, Edward and oddly Peter.

I sigh and look at Eric. "Are you going to be ok with this?"

He shrugs with a quirked eyebrow. "As long as they know their place I am perfectly fine Zoe. You set them straight this morning so I am fine with it as long as they stick to what they said."

I am glad that Peter and Edward are on either side of Tris though. Eric takes the place at the end with me next to him, Lauren, Milla, Logan and finally Four joined us.

I can see people are all staring at us as if wondering what the hell such an odd group is doing together. What had really mortified me was the whispering that followed my path. Apparently news of my achievement has made the rounds. Eric pulled me closer to his side and rubbed my back before turning to his food.

"Dammit I always forget something" I say looking at my tray and Edward tosses me some soy sauce and I grin. "Perfect!"

"Just use less wasabi next time. It sent fumes everywhere last time you used too much." He pleaded with me.

"Wear a gas mask." I caution him and Eric takes half of my wasabi on my plate. I turn to glare at him.

"You stole the Tabasco from me yesterday you can share this time." He shrugs and mixed soy sauce and his wasabi together.

"Fine! I will!" And I frown and my now decidedly lacking in spice plate then start to combine my own.

"Can I try some?" Tris asks and I slap her hand away as she tries to grab some.

"Bad spice virgin, bad! Unless you want to implode we start you out small. How about I get you some..." I pick up a bottle on the table and read the label. "Here is some paprika for your grilled chicken. Sound good? Paprika good. Dying of atomic heat death bad." Her eyes get wide and everyone laughs, even Four.

"See cousin, this is why I am glad you are around." She smiles and winks at me.

"Cousin!" I hear several yells.

Tris and I both nod and Lauren smiles knowingly. "Her dad is my Uncle."

"How is that possible?" Lynn asks and I stiffen.

"I was adopted but my biological mother is related to her. And no, I won't talk about her. My father was a Dauntless." I said stiffly and I could see those that knew smiling sadly at me.

"Who is your dad then?" Mar asks softly, her head tilted.

I look down and try to let sadness overwhelm me. "My father's name was Amar Salvador." I see the rest of the group connecting the dots to him being mentioned before and I feel my insides quiver a bit. I steel myself so I don't show how much I am hurting right now.

I clear my throat. "Tris here is a big ass cup of milk and your first protein powder. Just combine it together and drink it while you eat lunch. I am not doing training tonight but..."

Four shrugs and interrupts me. "I can do some things with her if she wants to." She nods and he nods back to her. "Ok. Then eat dinner after we are dismissed and we can see what you need help with after the second half of the day."

"Where are you going to be Zoe?" Peter asks worried.

"None ya Peter. Why aren't you with Goon 1&2?" I smile at him. Eric grabs my hand and holds it at the table. So subtle Eric. I refrain from rolling my eyes.

Peter shakes his head with a frown. "I didn't tell them to come here to begin with. Molly should have stayed in Candor and Drew I think was supposed to go to Abnegation. I told them before the choosing ceremony not to follow but they did anyways. I think my dad put them up to it to be honest." He growled out angrily.

"Wouldn't put it past the asshole." I shrug "If only just to mess with your escape."

He nodded. "Like you said before to me, sins of the father right. I'm not going to let him rule my life anymore. I just hope that my sister can get out too next year."

I grin and see Edward blush then busy himself eating. "I think there is a very good chance she might be coming here next year Peter."

He sighs but with a little smile. "I knew she was sneaking out to see you Zoe. She would never tell me. Not that I blamed her after everything happened. But hey, you taught her to stand up to those bullies like a certain Candor bitch that was making a fuss today."

"Is that why you disliked her from the beginning?" Tris asked me with a frown. I nodded and ate some rice and veggies.

"She isn't as nice as she likes to make it at first. She doesn't remember me but I know for a fact that she was spreading some pretty nasty rumors about people she had never even met in my own faction." I got my wicked grin and several people shuddered while Tris just smirked.

"You got back at her didn't you?" She stated gleefully.

I nodded smugly. "Two major pranks on one night was a pretty big record for me. But I worked it out. Got back at the bitch leader in part of it and Chris the other. Sorry Edward. I couldn't include you and Mayra in that. It really did involve breaking and entering. How you Candors found your way around is fucking beyond me. Believe me I needed every advantage I had and taking someone else would have slowed me down."

Peter's eyes got wide when he put it together. "You put the hair removal shit in all of her bath products and makeup didn't you? She had to wear a wig and draw on her eyebrows for a year!"

I shrug with a smirk. "I was going to do worse. You really shouldn't fuck with people I care about."

Lynn looked and me trying not to laugh and failing. "You have serious balls Zoe. You didn't do that did you?"

"Oh but she did. And fuck if I could figure it out either. I had just gone into Control and Intel. It was both hilarious and terrifying. And the only reason I know it is her now, is because the timing of them both suggests it." Logan grins at me. "You were what 13 at the time? You managed to systematically cause security failures in their entire sector except for the factionless part of the sector. Which we got a boost from for a few years without knowing why. Why did you do that part?"

"I was doing something bad needed to balance it with something good. It decreased their activity in that area by about…"

"77%...that year their activity was greatly reduced by 77% just from those enhancements." He grinned at me and laughed almost in disbelief "Because you needed to play a prank?"

"Because I needed to teach her she can't try and destroy a teenager's life because she thought she knew the truth. After the night I did that she didn't spread rumors about anyone in her faction or anyone else's for a long while. If I am not mistaken, she happened to do that today for the first time in five years. That was the lesson I taught her and I will teach her again. Only this time she will leave broken and bloody like I wanted to leave her the first time. Also, Amar suggested the first method knowing I needed to do something and since he couldn't though he wanted to…"

"Why would Amar want to get even with her?" Four asked looking at me

and frowning.

"You don't fuck with someone a Salvador cares for. Not and either live to tell about it or walk away unscathed." I looked at Eric from the side of my eye and saw him looking at me with his head tilted. I looked down at my food and started to pick at it.

"What other pranks have you pulled?" Tris asks eyes shining in mischievousness. Peter looks at her and shakes his head.

"Great! One day and she is already corrupting her. Now I really need to not be a dick to her again." He rolled his eyes. She elbowed him and he smiled at her. She smiled shyly back at him.

I suddenly felt a lot better about Peter and Edward moving on and began to hum and eat, back to my normal self. I took a bit of my now spiced food and closed my eyes and started to relax and enjoy my food again.

"So seriously tell us more of your pranks." Uri said.

"I don't really have any more." Edward ruined the lie by spraying milk from his nose. "Shut it Edward. I have had enough attention on me today. Or would like me to tell these people about the time you thought you could be a dick to Mayra and I wouldn't get back at you?"

"Nope, forget I said anything. She doesn't have any more pranks that she has ever played." He shakes his head.

"No now I need to know." Milla smiled at me.

"You know the Ferris wheel, the old one?" Everyone nods.

"Edward thought it would be fun to have her go up there with him when we were camping out down around there."

"You were camping out by yourselves?" Eric asked frostily.

"We were 11 and yes but Amar kept watch on us somehow. Not sure how or when. But he came and made sure we were warm and that my perimeter wasn't breached. The sonic emitters I rigged were fine"

"She means she rigged really fucking loud decibels to play through speakers she had enhanced and hidden. If a trip wire was triggered it would set off the speakers. I believe the sound was that of an entire platoons worth of guns firing off at once….a second….for ten minutes. It would have reached to Erudite." Edward rolled his eyes and grinned.

"It worked didn't it? I didn't hear you complaining you couldn't hear it when I triggered it in your room that night, remotely from the soundproofed safety of my own home. That was the prank by the way. In retaliation for taking Mayra up there and leaving her there for an hour alone and scared of heights. Every night for a week he was bombarded with those sounds at random times so he could never predict it." I smiled at him and everyone laughed.

"He apologized to her profusely and said he never would be mean to her again and they started seeing each other right after that. So in a way I facilitated love, not war." I chuckle as I take another bite and Tris laughs.

"I thought putting Caleb's hand in warm water when he was asleep was bad." Tris snorts and I break out laughing.

"See I inherited it from both sides in a way. Oh Tris, Amar told me something about your mom when she was here."

"She was Dauntless?" Is yelled almost down the table.

"Didn't I just say that?" I look around frowning.

"Careful Zoe, we might to say shut your Candor smart mouth next." Eric smirked at me.

"Mr. Smirks-o-lot makes a return again." I bite my lip knowing that he isn't going to like that at all.

"You know you are going to get it later, right?" He asks coldly.

"Worth it!" I smile cheekily at him and I hear chuckles.

"I can make you do punishments on this oh so important club night." He smirked when I glared at him. "Eric 3, Zoe 2? Is that the current count? Maybe it's more." He starts laughing as I pout. I then hear chuckles at the table getting louder.

"Fine! I withdraw said nickname. I apologize for the very disparaging nickname. Satisfied?"

"Partly. You are still getting it later and I now get to supervise the club night." He shrugged, looking smug as shit.

I turn my head away from him so he doesn't see my wicked grin and school my voice as if I am put out. "Fine! But only if you dance with me." I say keeping my face turned and I see Lauren and Tris grinning along with me.

"Deal. But you just played right into my hands..." He stops speaking and sighs. He closes his eyes for a moment and looks around. "Dammit! She got me didn't she?" I turn back to face him wearing the grin and he closes his eyes. "Seriously? I even heard the tone. I heard it and I walked right into it."

"You did say he was in trouble with her didn't you Logan. Finally met his match" Milla smiled and I laughed.

More prank stories were shared while we ate and got ready for the second half of the training day. I made sure Tris and I drank our protein drinks before I realized I needed to go put everything up.

"Hey I am going to go put our protein stuff in my locker but here is a bar for you and then one for me." I said handing Tris hers. "I will meet you guys in the training room." I said as I got up and threw away my trash and put the tray up. I didn't even realize Eric had walked out with me until he tugged me back by my jacket.

"Hey, you ok? I know that talking about your Dad and hearing about him today must be hard." He said as he took my hand in his and he walked me to the dorms.

"I'm ok. It's confusing because I like hearing about him and to know that I am in the same class as him on something is kind of bittersweet. I hurt for him more than me. That he couldn't be there beside Logan, you, Max and Four as you all celebrated my accomplishment. I can almost see his face Eric. See his lopsided smile and the way his eyes crinkled when he was trying not to laugh or smile at something. When I was standing up there I felt like he was there in a way I guess." I shrug.

He pulled me close to his side as we walked. "I get it. He's kind of my voice of reason in my head. Anytime I think I am going to lose my temper or lose control; I see his face too and I hear him. That annoying way he had of answering a question with a question." He gave a little chuckle.

I smiled and giggled a little. "He was kind of the master at that. Getting a straight out answer from him was sometimes like pulling teeth. He loved that whole 'I am a man of Mystery' bullshit."

Eric laughed, nodding. "That is the perfect way to describe what he tried to portray."

We entered the dorm and I went to put the protein powders in my locker. I remembered Max passing me something so I pulled it out of my pocket and see it is a small plastic case holding a small disc. It is going to either be a vid file or doc file. I frown and put it in the bottom of my toiletries.

"What was that Zoe?" Eric looked down at me frowning.

"I don't know for sure. Max slipped it to me when he shook my hand earlier. I figure I can look at it sometime after training tonight. I still have to go through everything he left for me here and I never went into his room at our bunker. Just couldn't bring myself to do that." I shrug and stand up after locking up. He wraps me in his arms and kisses me gently.

"We have to go to the bunker anyways to get the stuff. I can help if you want and we can go through what he left here. It might be a good idea to move it to somewhere safe anyways." He frowned.

"I was hoping to be able to move it all. I couldn't see everything in the little cubby area so I don't know how much is there. I think I would need to get a bag just from what little I saw." He nodded and took my hand in his then led me out of the dorm towards the training room.

"I need you to take Tris through those same warm up exercises you did this morning." He paused and smirked at me. "Without displaying just how limber you are to every freaking punk in the there, please? And then work through the stations with her. We're going to be doing the rest of the time working on the fitness today. You guys did laps this morning so I won't make you two do them for now." He rolls his eyes as if a thought just occurred to him. "But some idiot is bound to mess up and make everyone do those laps."

I chuckle with a small shrug. "I told you didn't I. I predict it will be Al or Chris that causes it. She isn't going to learn her lesson until it is forced physically on her." My whole demeanor changes to menacing.

"Just save it until the fights Zoe." He chuckled and then turned serious. "When you talked about her and those pranks…"

I sigh and look at him. "Part of the conversation for tonight."

He quirked an eyebrow and pulled me to a stop. "Were the pranks because of me Zoe?"

I looked away and sighed again. "You don't mess with someone a Salvador cares about Eric."

I turned to look back at him. He looked pleased and I frowned wondering why he is pleased by that. "What are you pleased about?"

"Maybe because for the first time since Amar passed I see someone gives a shit about me." He let out a shaky breath.

I smiled softly at him and we just stared at each other. "More than you know Eric and for longer than you can remember." I whisper softly and I hear his breath catch.

"She will pay for it Zoe. For taking that away from me and us." His voice took on that scythe quality again.

"Remember your promise that it will be by my hand if possible." My eyes get hard and I growl that last part.

He nods and then our moment is broken when Tris walks up to join us but Eric doesn't let go of my hand.

"Hey guys. Ready for this Zoe?" Her smile is one of anticipation and I match it with my own.

"Born ready Tris." I smirk and Eric chuckles.

"Well then let's make sure you two get a nice taste of hell, shall we?" He motions for Tris to go in but walks in holding my hand and does not let go until he steps to Four's side. Making it plain to everyone just who I belong too. I can't help but roll my eyes at how smug he looks.

Tris nudges my shoulder smiling and laughing at his antics. Peter walks up to stand by Tris and I cast a knowing smile at him. "Shut it Zoe." He gave me a lopsided smile.

"Just as long as you remember what I said at lunch Peter. No one messes with someone a Salvador cares for." My eyes narrow at him and I say pointedly. I see him swallow and nod.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Salvador." He gives his lopsided grin to me again and I smile back.

"What do you think is in store for us?" Edward asked.

I laughed a bit gleeful. "What is in store for us? Pain Edward, lots and lots of pain."

The four of us chuckle when people around us look scared. I roll my eyes and mutter lowly. "Seriously did they know what faction they walked into? Because I seriously have my doubts that they do. You would think with all the black and weapons they would have picked up on it by now."

Tris snickers with a nod. "We are a bit of a masochistic lot aren't we; Dauntless in general?"

I smirk "No pain no gain right?"

"You four done with the witty banter and tormenting the other initiates. Generally that is our job?" Four looks at us amused and shaking his head at us.

I bite my lip trying not to laugh. I just give an affirmative nod and hear the others tell him yes.

It takes a bit for everyone to get in and I know the second it turns 1 pm that we are going to have to do laps because someone couldn't be on time.

I quickly sign out, 'Get ready for laps' and surprisingly Peter signs back 'Great'. I give him a surprised look.

"I had to find out what you were always talking about with my sister and Edward. And to do that I had to learn it. Besides I read that it is closely linked with the military hand signals, but didn't get around to learning all of those." He shrugged.

Edward smiled at him with a shrug. "Well then I guess we will have to get you caught up."

Tris and I smiled at each other. I felt this odd sense of wholeness with our group of friends. She reached for my hand and squeezed then nodded at me telling me she is feeling the same thing too.

Our prediction was right about the laps except that it was limited to those five people that couldn't be bothered to be on time. Among them unsurprisingly were Chris and Al.

Will, it looked like, had been smart and not followed their late example. Tris, Edward, Peter and I were told to start our warm up and then move to all the stations. Eric took the late group and the rest went to other stations to warm up and work on their own.

Tris and I started our customized Yoga. Then I started to show her some of the warm up exercises for the martial arts aspects.

First were the ankle jumps for a good ten minutes then we moved into shoulder rotations. I had us do some lunges, squat thrusts, burpees, pushups, crunches and planking. We did some other cardio based exercises like jumping jacks and using the wall for squats. I saw they had stair climbers and we hit those hard trying to work our legs really good.

We finally stopped after a solid hour or two of working through that rotation and Four came up to us "Those were a good start. Actually I had the others following you too. Eric said you are going to work on lower body or core?"

I took a big swig of water and Tris was joining me in that too. We hadn't had to stop once and I beamed at her. She was giving it her everything.

I nodded at Four. "Our advantage is going to be kicks and maybe alternative ways to get out of holds. I have a way that has worked for me. But I don't want anyone but Tris to see it; besides you and Eric I mean." I finished when he quirked an eyebrow. "Kind of like a secret weapon." I shrug and he nods.

"So what are you going to run her through now? Can you show me each of the things you are going to do quickly so I can determine if I can add anything or if I think it will help?" I nodded and got serious.

"Of course. You guys are the instructors here. We need all the help we can get." I frown. Why was he asking my permission almost?

"Because I know you are capable Zoe. I only treat initiates like children when they act like it." He smirked at me.

"Did I say that out loud?" I look at Tris and she shakes her head no.

"No I could just read your look. You don't let your emotions show plainly, except when you are laughing or smiling. But I could read that one. Let's go over here." He nodded to an area with an open enough space and even a few pull up bars and stations for other workout equipment. We follow along into the area.

"Well one of the things we are going to work on is torso strength and range. One of the exercises for that is a variation of torso twists." I go to the pull up bar and jump up then grab it and raise myself as if I am going to do a pull up but stop when I am almost level with the bar.

"You don't complete the pull up but the combined stretching of the upper body and then adding in the twists" I did a series of ten pulses of my hips to one side then switched to ten to the other. "It really works that core area." I say as I do a ten pull ups and then drop down. Four looked amused and I shrugged with a grin.

"I was already there for the pull ups. Would have been lazy not to complete them." I heard Eric chuckle a bit behind me.

"Well look at that Four. We might have initiates worth a shit this time. Although I am tempted to just send those other five packing right now; complaining pussies." I look over at him and his jaw is clenched.

Four looked over at the five that were struggling with doing pushups and Al could be heard to be whining.

I quirk an eyebrow and grin but Eric sighs, shaking his head. "We haven't even shown anyone the fighting techniques yet, Zoe. As much as I would love to do what you are thinking it would just be her slaughter."

I full on pout. "Well shit."

Everyone starts chuckling, even Four. Eric walks back over to correct a few guys that were trying to do pushups in the way that the girls are doing them.

I shake my head and look back to Tris. "Do you want to try those torso twists or do you want to stay on the ground for now and do…" She didn't even wait for me to finish she just went over to the bar and started to jump for it.

We are both short but she is a bit shorter than me. When she couldn't reach the bar for the fifth time Peter walked over and grabbed her by the hips. He helped her when she jumped to boost her further. She blushed as she muttered thanks and Peter walked off blushing too.

I got a wicked grin on my face and Four elbowed me with a smirk on his face. "Let her adjust to it on her own Zoe. She is doing a lot better than I did with everything at first." He said only loud enough for me to hear.

"I know. She is so strong. Is it strange that I am already so proud and attached to her after such a short time? I mean I always kept an eye on her but I couldn't actually go up to her and talk to her." I frown at that. "Or maybe I could have and I was just too scared of rejection. Her father would probably think that because of who my mother is…"

Four turned me to look at him, stopping my line of thought. "You're nothing like her Zoe. Are you a bit more brutal than I would have thought? Yeah. But not in the way she is Zoe. You fight FOR those you care about and that is something she is not capable of. Got it?"

"Yeah, thanks. Just sometimes I wonder if there is something of her buried deep in me and one day I will snap." I mutter and he lets me go as his jaw clenches.

"I hated fights when I went into initiation. It reminded me too much of my father. You were right though Zoe, we can't let them win." He gives me a small smile.

"We won't." I nod in reply and I smile when I see Tris gritting her jaw in determination and her arms shaking. "You got it Tris just five more to the right and you so kicked ass." I smirked at her and I saw her eyes flash with pride.

She finished and then did five pull ups before her arms gave out. Four nodded in pride. "Good job Tris. Let's move on to the next one Zoe."

"Take some water Tris and I will show you the next one. It is using the bar again. This one is centered more for my spin kicks but it still works the core muscles we need. It is called a 'L' Hang. The principle is that you lift your leg out to form an L while hanging. It works the core and our leg muscles. If you can't get the leg as high as me that's fine. If you need to bend your leg at first do it. Just remember like with this morning you hurt yourself more by pushing too hard." I gave her a pointed look and she nodded and drank some water.

"So this will help with your spin kicks?" Four tilted his head and sounded skeptical.

"Let me do it to show you and you can try it yourself." I shrug and he nods and smiles.

I walk back over to the bar and pull myself up to the same height. I lift my right leg up while keeping my left leg straight. I get it to just above my waist making sure that the shape is a perfect L and hold it there for a thirty second count.

I lower it slowly and repeat on that same leg four more times. I then repeat that whole process with the next leg. I can feel it radiating through my core and legs causing me to smile.

I don't know why but I have always loved the burn and strain when I am really working out. When I finish my set I do another ten pull-ups and then drop to the ground.

Tris, Four, Peter, Edward and Eric are all standing there looking at me.

"Why were you smiling up there?" Four asked with an eyebrow raised.

I drank some water and shrugged, still grinning. "I love the burn when I am really working out. Gives me a rush."

Eric chuckles with a smirk and darkened eyes. The rest of them shake their head.

I look at Four with a smirk. "Did you want to try it out?"

He smirked back at me and went to the bar then jumped up. He did well for the first two sets of thirty seconds. But I could tell by the end of the third time on his first leg raise he was seeing the real burn. I smiled and drank some more water as I felt Eric move to be beside me.

"I don't think I have met anyone else that gets what I love about working out so much. Max and Logan were always bitching at me about being in the gym all the time." He said lowly watching Four and smirking.

"Yeah it is like my competition is my own body and I need to constantly be better." I say looking at him smiling.

He shakes his head and when he looks at me I can see his eyes are sparkling with desire. "If we were alone." he mutters and looks back at his group and cusses. "Fucking worthless." He briefly brushes his hand on my arm and stalks back to his group.

Tris steps closer and smiles. "Four is looking like he is straining now." We chuckle and she looks at me. "You know, I am really glad you told me. I know that was hard for you but I oddly feel complete with you. I think I did from the moment you helped me on the train. I kept wondering why you would hang back with me when I somehow knew you could have been with the Dauntless-born. It was because you wanted to make sure I made it on, wasn't it?"

I nod with a small smile. "I always kept an eye on you Tris. I couldn't approach you but I always tried to make sure you were ok." I look at my feet with a frown. "I saw you climb the top of your house a few times and I knew then you would be joining me here. I still would have tried to protect you though no matter where you went." I looked at her and she smiled at me and nodded.

"I am glad I have you Zoe. We can make each other stronger and complete." I nodded and smiled back at her.

We were both pulled out of our conversation as Four finished and did ten pull ups. He then dropped down and nodded at me. "That was a good one Zoe. I think I will be sore just from that one alone." He said a bit out of breath.

He nodded at Tris as she went to do the same thing with her shoulders squared. Peter started forward to help her and she gave him a big smile but shook her head at him and jumped up. It only took her two tries and she was up. I got a shit eating grin on my face. Four elbowed me laughing.

"You two. It's almost like you feed off of each other the way you interact. She has just come alive even more than when she first got here. There is a fire in each of you most only dream of." He says warmly but his face still schooled.

I blush at this. "I feel complete with her here and with everyone else. It will only make more dangerous though." My voice gets hard and he looks at me and nods.

"Because there is more to lose and to protect." He says simply.

I nod and look back at Tris who is moving on to her next leg. She can't get her shape into a perfect L but it is damn close. I walk closer and frown at her when I see she is pushing it just a bit much but shake my head and grin at her. "We are too damn much alike Tris. You got this!"

I could see that spurred her on and Peter and Edward chuckled. I looked over at them and frowned "What are you guys doing?"

"Four and Eric said to follow you guys for certain parts." Edward shrugged and I nodded then shrugged too.

"Okay. So you guys are waiting to do this then?" I asked.

They nodded and I looked back to Tris. She had just finished the last leg set and with shaking arms did five pull-ups before she dropped and I went and helped to catch her beaming at her.

"You are kicking ass Tris." I squeezed her arm.

She was panting. "I feel like I am getting my ass kicked."

I mock gasped. "Such language young lady."

Peter had gone to the bar and was trying not to laugh as he strained with his first leg set. "See, bad influence." He said while struggling.

We laughed and waited for him to finish and for Edward to do his set before I moved us on. Four was still with us and Eric was heard cursing at something Al wasn't doing right causing me to sigh.

"He really should have stayed in Candor." I muttered lowly.

Tris looked over at me with a frown. "He makes me uncomfortable sometimes."

I nodded with my own frown. "Just try not to be alone with him Tris. I will try and find a way to deal with him if it comes to it." I know my voice went to menacing.

Four stiffened "Let us handle it Zoe if something happens. But would care to elaborate on what you mean."

"Candor's are prized for honesty but not so much for being able to admit that one of them could be lying. Unless of course your parents have influence, then any reports of inappropriate behavior towards girls just disappear. No matter how many girls say the same thing." My voice is steel as are my eyes as I turn my head to look at Al struggling with pull-ups and Eric watching over him.

Four sighs as he looks too."Try and make sure you two girls are never alone then please?"

Edward nods and frowns. "At least Zoe and Tris share the same bunk. If need be they can just sleep together."

Tris nods "Yeah that might be good if he keeps it up."

I turn to her and my blood has gone to fire. "Keep what up?" I ask softly on such a deadly calm voice that it causes Edward to stiffen.

"Zoe…" he warns.

"He keeps trying to hold my hand or sit really close. He looks at me and I feel my skin crawl." Her voice gets shaky and my eyes go to fire. My nostrils flare and I feel a hand of steel clamped on me. My body starts to vibrate.

"Get Eric now Tris!" Four orders her. "Zoe look at me now. Zoe, you have to control it."

My body is shaking in rage and I feel like I am going to explode. I feel myself being forced against a wall and start to struggle until I feel someone cupping my cheek and a voice pierces through the rage fog.

"Zoe, you have to breathe through it. Breathe through it until you can get it somewhat under control and then we can move you to work it out on the bags. Can you hear me baby?" I hear the calm commanding voice of Eric but the rage is pounding through my vision still.

"If he touches her…" I gasp out and my hands are clenched.

"We won't let that happen. We know to look out now, right?" He was trying to get me to talk through it and I didn't want to.

"Talking won't help." I grit out.

"It better, otherwise you fight me Zoe. That would be the only other solution we could move to. If you want that, fine we can go right now." He said in his cold leader voice.

It seemed like it took hours to pierce through but I knew I couldn't fight him like this. Not after what happened the last time I was like this.

"I can't fight anyone like this Eric. I'll kill them. I would want to kill them. I don't want…" My vision and control return and I start blinking. I see Eric crouched down in front of me. I had been pushed or moved to the far end of the room and into a corner on the ground. He was holding me in place with his arm across my shoulders.

I sigh and my body relaxes from its tension. I see him relax a bit more and move his arm off of me but then to cup my cheek. "How bad was it?" I whisper.

"You didn't hurt anyone really. It took me a lot to get you here but you didn't fight me as much as I think you could have. Talk to me about what happened." His gaze was soft and I felt so ashamed. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"It was the rave all over again. I can't, please don't make me talk about this right now. I will tell you. I just want to get through the day." I pleaded with him but still wouldn't look at him. He sighed and lifted my eyes to his by my chin.

"Zoe, this happens to more than just you. It has happened to me, even Four has had it happen. You are a warrior and it is truly in your blood. Your Dad even had it happen before. Don't be ashamed that you have a warrior's blood and spirit. Please baby?" Now he was pleading with me. I looked into his eyes and saw he truly meant it. He wasn't just saying it to calm me or appease me.

I nod, feeling a bit better. "How long did it all take, how long was I like that?"

"Not even ten minutes baby. It seemed like as soon as I got to you it calmed you down a bit. Four said he had a feeling that I would be the only one to be able to help you. Either way I am glad he got me." He smiled at me and rose to his feet. He pulled me up with him, then wrapped me in his arms.

"I couldn't fight you. When you said for me to. I knew I couldn't chance hurting you like I did them." I whispered against his chest.

He nodded, stroking my back. "I didn't want to fight you like that either. Not that I don't want to spar with you at some point. But not like that. I just had a feeling if I said that it might get through to you."

He leaned me back "I have a feeling there is a reason I knew that and why it worked. I am guessing that is going to be a part of our talk tonight?"

I sighed and nodded "Yes, that will be a part of the talk."

His jaw clenched and he nodded. "You going to be ok to go back?"

I nodded with a frown but determined. "I need to. Getting in the workout will help with it. I will just have to not look in their direction until I have gotten it worked out."

He nodded and smirked but I don't know what about. "Get going then. I have an initiate to torture a bit."

I got my wicked grin as I got his meaning now. "I wondered what the smirk was about." I leaned up and kissed him briefly. "Make him hurt until he is losing every bit of any lunch he has ever had."

"Damn you're sexy, you know that?" He grinned at me biting his lip a bit.

I laughed and he smiled at me. "I am going to get back to what I am supposed to do. I have to apologize to the others too. I am sure it wasn't a pretty sight."

He shrugged that off. "Tris wasn't scared of you at all. In fact her holding your hand calmed you more than Four touching you. You two have bonded really quickly." I could tell he was a little more than pleased that I reacted better to someone NOT Four.

We heard a familiar whine and Four yelling at the sack of shit that was soon to be deceased or factionless. Eric got his wicked grin and leaned in to kiss me quickly before he turned then went to implement a little sanctioned torture.

I practically skipped back to Tris. She saw me and ran up to me then tackled me. We fell to the ground laughing.

"Zoe! Are you better now? I was so worried about you. I didn't know what was happening but Eric explained it to me when we got you away from everyone. You didn't want anyone else to touch you." She said in a rush as we still laid sprawled on the ground.

I frowned "I am sorry you had to see that."

She interrupted me shaking her head. "I'm not. I have had something similar happen from time to time. My mom seemed to understand and knew what to do. I thought it was panic attacks. It's what Caleb kept calling them. Mom never called them that though and she was able to do what Eric did. Now I know I am not alone and that it wasn't because I was weak." She smiled at me.

I gave a sad smile and sighed. "One day I will have to tell you why I am not ok with it just yet. One day soon actually. But not now, now." I did my pop up and heard a growl. I looked over and saw Eric scowl and shake his head. "Oops, oh well. Ok so now we have to finish our work out. Did Four have you doing anything while I was out of commission?"

I held out a hand to Tris but she shook her head and got a look of concentration. She attempted to replicate the move I just had performed and did pretty damn well. She just had trouble with rolling her body up. I reached out to steady her but let her try and complete it. She was a bit slower but made it up the rest of the way. At the end we were both smiling ear to ear and I heard a throat clear beside us.

We turned to see Four smirking at us. "Could you save that stuff for the afterhours sessions? We want the element of surprise here."

We both look chastised but then smiled. "But she did it!" I sort of girly squealed and Four barked out in laughter.

He nodded "That she did. Impressive considering I tried it after I saw you do it and fell on my ass several times. Maybe only girls can do it?" He shrugged and we laughed. His eyes studied me and knew I was still upset about what happened. "It's ok Zoe. I had that happen several times to me. Ask Eric sometime about one of our matches from initiation. Not something I was proud of. You guys ready?"

I smiled at him and nodded. "Well then lead on Zoe" He motioned to where we were working out before and I saw Peter and Edward working on weights.

When we walked up they both stopped and came up to me. Edward was first and pulled me in a tight hug but then released me quickly and Peter did the same. I smiled and nodded at them and without another word they went back to weights.

I turned to Tris and looked to Eric and saw he had watched but wasn't scowling. I guess a good sign he wasn't about to go cave man on the guys.

"So we worked our legs on the bar but we need to do that on the ground now. We are going to do ground exercises from here on out. So Four we are going to need some medicine balls." I said looking at Four.

He nodded and walked off then called Peter and Edward to him. A few minutes later they all came back and had one for all of us. They handed Tris and I one and I directed them all over to the wall.

"So this first one is the Medicine ball side throw. This help build up the rotational or twisting power. One of my kicks that I do is all about my rotational power and even round house and spin kicks need it. It does work the core but it can help the chest too. For this you could throw to a partner but I didn't really have one so I used the wall." Four nodded and had us all space out with me in the front so I could lead.

"You want to space your legs as far as your shoulder span and be perpendicular with the wall. You are going to rotate to face the wall then throw the ball and hold the rotation until the ball bounces back catch and go back to the starting position. We do this in reps of 50 for each side." I heard Peter groaning. I threw him a hard look and he shut up instantly causing Four to chuckle and Tris to bite her lip.

"You want to make sure you are putting the pressure in the rotation or it isn't worth doing at all. I am going to start my reps and you guys follow along after you have it down." I nod and begin to do my reps, making sure to breathe properly and putting more force into my rotations and throws.

Once I finish my right side I turn to face the others and do my left. I smile when I see Tris is barely behind me and she has her chin up in determination. I smile at her encouragingly and her lips twitch.

We all finish the last set fairly close to each other and I move them onto the next ones using the medicine balls. We only had two more to do and the last one I didn't have us do as many because it was an advanced technique. The medicine ball twists with the Partner went well and I showed them the medicine ball V-up. Only I was able to do the full 20 I had set out. Tris tried to keep up but they all had to stop when I made them at 10.

"Well, that was a fucking work out." Four muttered and I chuckled. "Where did you come up with some of this stuff?" He shook his head at me.

"I found the workouts when researching martial arts in the archives. Some of the best martial arts masters came up with them. My personal hero Bruce Lee swore by a lot of them too." I shrugged and Edward chuckled.

"What fresh hell are you going to put us through now?" Peter muttered after he drank some water.

"Combat movement. Tris and I need to be fast and it wouldn't hurt you guys either." I shrug "So moving out of the way is one of the biggest ways to defend ourselves Tris. We are going to have to be fast because most of the guys and even Molly have a reach advantage on us. So we are going to work on running backwards and sideways. Making sure that we have sure footing in the fights is going to be just as important as being able to throw a punch or kick." I look to Four and he nods.

We all did the backwards and sideways runs for a good 15 minutes on each and then came back in. Peter and Edward moved off to do other workouts when I indicated we would be doing ones that only Tris and I would benefit from.

"Okay, now we start with working the legs for your kicks. Remember when we did the splits this morning?" Tris nodded. "So I want to do them again but this time we are going to try and rotate while in the split. Eric is going to be so pissed but it has to be done." I growl out and Four chuckles at me.

"I am going to show you what I mean, but just like this morning, do not try and force your way down any further. It took me awhile to get to where I am Tris and you won't need to be able to go all the way down to have the ability to kick. So just follow along after I show you." She nodded.

I slide down into my split where my legs were in the position of one in front and one in back with my torso facing forward. I was able to go all the way down and put my hands with my palms flat on either side of me.

"Okay, see how my back is straight and I have my arms to either side of me with palms flat. This is just you extending the muscles in your legs, abdomen and even your wrists and arms." She nodded and frowned and went into a split of her own and she got even farther down. We both broke out into big smiles. "That's really good Tris. You're already able to get farther down than this morning. How does it feel do you feel too much of a burn?"

I narrow my eyes to see if she is trying to push it too far and she gets a sheepish look. "Ease up just a bit, there you go. You don't want to be hurting just when doing this. Just go so far that you can feel those muscles extending, ok?"

"Got it. It does feel better but it wasn't too painful before. I honestly think I will be in a full split before the week is over." She squares her chin and her eyes flash in determination.

"I am sure of it. You're already almost there. And look you barely have 5 inches before you are on the ground. Ok now here is the rotation part." I sigh preparing for Eric to rage.

"He is just going to have to get over it." I mumble "Watch me Tris." Then while still in the split, I turn my torso so that I am now in a full split but facing to where my torso lines up with my legs with my back straight. I move my arms so that my hands are palm down on the ground in front of my body.

I hear Eric yelling at the initiates he is working with about not being able to do anything right and stomping around. I don't dare look at him. I feel the daggers he is throwing me with his eyes right now.

Four clears his throat and looks away blushing. I snap after that. "Oh for fucks sake it isn't that fucking shocking! Tris, good job stop pushing it though you are hurting your hips. Maybe just turn your torso to the left and hold it for ten seconds then do the same on the other side and repeat."

I do the things I suggested with her. She tries the position again and sees more flexibility. I nod and look over at Eric who has his arms crossed over his chest glaring at me. When he sees me looking at him, he signs 'enough'.

I nod with a sigh. "The move I want to show you to get out of a hold involve splits but like I said that will have to wait until it is just the instructors and the two of us. For now let's move on to leg lifts."

When I move out of the split I do it in the way I have always done without even thinking. I lean forward so that my legs are still in the split but my entire upper body is touching the ground out in front of my legs, making my body into a T position almost. Then I move my legs towards each other to close. I move into a bear crawl position almost but without my legs being spaced apart. It happens fast because I am so used to it and is almost like walking for me. My body just automatically doing it now.

I realize maybe that was not a great habit when I feel Eric beside me. "Hallway, now Zoe." His voice has that steel in it again and my back goes rigid. I am not scared but instead kind of pissed.

"Fine." I growl out and stomp to the hallway and whirl around to find Eric right there. He shoves me against the wall.

"I thought I said none of that shit Zoe." He looked down at me with nostrils flaring.

"I have to work with Tris on it and it's part of being able to have high and strong kicks Eric. Only you were thinking of anything else." My eyes flash in anger.

"You were told not to do that in front of all the other initiates Zoe." His jaw clenches. "You could have done them at another time with her." His hands are digging into my waist and I feel his hardness as he presses against me.

"When Eric? I'm not doing training tonight and tomorrow I am not going to be able to work with her either. That is two significant amounts of time frames for valuable training. I have to use the time I have wisely and I can't worry about what some shithead in there thinks. News flash Eric. If they are going to think it they don't need any encouragement from me. They are going to regardless. They know I am yours and if they get any ideas otherwise I do have ways to disillusion them of that idea quickly." I growl all that out with a clenched jaw. Then I grab his vest and pull him in for a kiss, allowing all my anger and passion to pour through.

When we finally break apart we both stand there panting and nostrils flared trying to get control. He finally speaks and it is still strained. "You weren't doing that to get back at me were you Zoe?"

"No Eric! I was doing it because it needed to be done to keep myself ready for fights and to get her ready. I may mess with you and tease you Eric, but I am not going to deliberately try and piss you off like that." I say hurt he would even think I would do that. "Can I go back in now? Are you done accusing me of shit or trying to control me?" I snap out.

"Zoe, I'm…" I interrupt him.

"It's fine Eric. Just let me go back please." My body is stiff and I won't look at him. I know I should let it go but I don't just move on from hurt in the matter of seconds.

"Fine." He pushes away from me and stalks into the training room without even looking back it me.

I stand there a second and glare at his back then let out a breath and stalk back into the room. I stomp up to Four. "Mind if I demonstrate some punches and kicks for Tris on the punching bag?" I ask through a clenched jaw.

He sighs but nods. "Go ahead and work it out on the bag Zoe. Just try not to do too many advanced ones please."

I nod stiffly and walk over to where there are some small lightly padded sparring gloves and strap them on my hands. I grab a pair for Tris and hand them to her. She looks at me worried "You ok?"

"Yeah I just have a temper and so does he. I also don't let shit go easily. I will be fine after I punch something for a bit." I growl and we go over to a punching bag. "I told Four I wouldn't show you the advanced shit right now. And since just fucking trying to do my normal routine got me into trouble we will have to be careful." I mutter loudly.

"Throat chops" I make the same throat chop motion I had done to Peter but with a lot more force. "Efficient in hurting your opponent but also can cause a major distraction allowing for you to either get away or make your next move. As I did on the roof I combined this with I knee to the face." I demonstrated the two together. "Also effective but could be dangerous as you are in the area of attack. Area of attack is the radius of your opponent's range of motion. If you are in close enough to do this combination you are also in danger of a counter attack. Sometimes it is just better to do one and get the hell out of there."

She nods and follows my example and we practice just that combo with as much force as we can manage, a few times.

For the next hour we worked on the variations of elbow strikes. Downward elbow strike, spinning elbow strike and then we faced each other and worked on blocking elbow strikes. Then I moved her onto simple sidekicks.

We did a rotation of combining what I had already showed her. We would do the throat chop, elbow strike and side kick and then move away. I slowly started having her to view the bag as an actual moving opponent and dodging then moving out of range after having moved in for an attack.

I showed her a few variations on ways to block in general. The standard Dauntless defensive position is to hold your hands and arms in an almost crossed pattern to cover your face and throat. We worked with blocking a few strikes on each other with that. Then I showed her a few ready stances for Krav Maga and Karate in general. We worked to find a combination of stances that seemed to work for her and that she could flow through easily.

Before we knew it was already the end of the day and we were being called to bring it in.

"Alright everyone over here." Eric called and he sounded as calm as he normally does. Maybe he worked out his anger like I did. I know I felt better having been able to release that through physical exertion.

"Tomorrow same time you are going to report here. The weapons portion will still be the first half of the day. Then after lunch you will resume working on your sorely lacking fitness." He scowled at the group he had been working with. "Then we will start teaching you some fighting techniques. Maybe even get a sparring session or two in." He side eyed me and smirked.

"Tomorrow you will have Four but instead of me Aidan, another of your leaders, will be stepping in. Word of warning. You think I am ruthless and a dick, you haven't seen shit yet. I can almost guarantee if you keep up with that whining and smart mouth shit you have going on, you will be laid out on your back before you can blink." I could see the other initiates pale and I inwardly rolled my eyes.

"You are all dismissed." He waved everyone away. I began to unstrap my gloves and walked over to put them up. I noticed Tris over with Four and Peter having a conversation. Four nodded to them both and then they walked out together, but not before Tris signed she would see me later tonight.

I had already told her I was supposed to go with Eric, but I wasn't sure if that was still happening.

"Feel better now Zoe?" Eric asked from beside me as I was putting my gear that I had used back into its storage.

"Yes. Do you feel better?" I asked facing him with my chin raised.

He gave a small smile. "Not quite yet, but I can wait. You have a choice. You can grab whatever you need from your dorm and take a shower there or at my apartment. We can go grab the stuff that needs to be secured after that."

"If I don't have to shower at the dorm I would prefer that." I shrug.

He let out a long breath through his nose and I knew he was trying to restrain himself from something I just didn't know what. "Ok. Logan won't be available until after 8 anyways. We can grab something from the dining hall and take it back to my apartment and have that talk. Go to the dorm Zoe and pack your stuff. Enough for the night and tomorrow since we will be leaving early. I will meet you there and bring a bag for you."

I nodded and was going to say something but he stepped forward and brought me to him for a kiss. When we broke apart I was dizzy again. "I shouldn't but I think I fucking love it when you are all angry too." He smirked at me.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Figures." He smiled and laughed a little.

"I talked with Four. We are going to let Peter and Edward train with you guys too if you want. Lauren might bring Uri, Lynn and Mar in on it too. They are important to you and so I will do what I can for them." He said softly and surprised me completely.

His eyes softened as he looked at me. "You need family around you Zoe and I am gonna make damn sure you are protected. So not completely for unselfish reasons. But it if it helps keep you safe and helps us in the end, then I will do whatever I need to do." He cupped my cheek and kissed my forehead. "See you at your dorm Zoe."

He turned and walked away quickly and I took a second to process all that then walked out as well. My mind was in a whirl. Coming here I knew I would have Tris and that I would tell her eventually. I knew I would have Edward with me as well.

But the moment my feet hit the roof I had started to gain so much more than I could have imagined. It both made me feel more complete and scared me so much because then there was much more to lose. All the possibilities for people I loved to get hurt or die seemed to flood me and I felt that feeling of the darkness almost surround me trying to consume me.

For a moment I thought I was going to collapse from the sheer terror I felt for everyone around me but I was able to push it and the darkness away. I was born a fighter and I would never give up trying to fight for those I love. I realized I was standing in front of my bunk and shook my head. I bent to open my locker and start grabbing things and putting them together.

I went ahead and put the sketch along with Eric's note into my toiletry bag. I then grabbed a pair of training gear that could work for the outing tomorrow and still be comfortable for the physical part later in the day. I made sure to grab a casual outfit with the appropriate underthings, thankful Lauren had insisted.

I pulled out one of the nice long sleeved leather jackets and bundled everything into that. I also made sure to put in a few protein powders and bars for me and frowned in thought. I would have to take it some to Tris, so I grabbed a few more and put hers in my workout jacket pocket.

I heard steps behind me as I closed and locked my locker and I went into a ready tension because that was not Eric's footsteps. When I felt the person behind me while I was still crouched I pushed my leg out and did a leg sweep dropping the person to the ground and I popped up to look down and the now snarling Molly.

I didn't make another move towards her just gave her my cold stare. "You needed something Molly?" I could tell my voice was menacing and I saw her flinch.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:(Edit for grammar errors and other little things) Hope that was a slightly better break than I have done in the last two. Here is the next chapter for your viewing pleasure!**

 **Disclaimer: V Roth still won't hand Eric over (sobs quietly) Otherwise I will just continue to play in her world and mess around freely!**

 **Chapter 6**

 _I didn't make another move towards her just gave her my cold stare. "You needed something Molly?" I could tell my voice was menacing and I saw her flinch._

"You are such a disgusting bitch Salvador. Peter is supposed to be with me. But all he could talk about was you and being with you. I gave him everything Zoe. I gave him everything!" She shouted. I realized she was in love with him and they had probably been sleeping together.

"I am sorry Molly. I really am. I made it clear to him I just wanted to be friends." I said a little less menacing and I saw her deflate.

"He made it plain to me too Zoe. And I didn't care, I just let him use me. I followed him here and it doesn't even matter that he told me not to. I did it anyways." She whimpered a bit and I reached down to help her up. She looked at the hand in surprise but took it and allowed me to help her up.

"It sucks Molly. I know it really does. You love someone and they just look right through you like they don't see you anymore. Maybe they never really did. Not like you dreamed they would. It will hurt for a while and then it gets better. I don't know about the physical aspect of it though Molly because I was too young to even think about that. I think you will be ok. You just have to find out who you are without Peter. You know the only reason Drew stuck with you guys right? It wasn't because of Peter." I shake my head "You guys have one seriously fucked up love triangle going on." I saw her look of shock and shook my head.

"Talk to Drew that is the best I can say. Or maybe just concentrate on training and yourself. That would be my suggestion. Don't rely on someone else to define you." I shrug casually.

Molly stood looking at me "Why are you being nice to me?"

I scoff as I shake my head. "I'm not being nice to you Molly. I am being truthful and a decent human being, for once I guess. I am also just sharing some hard won advice but only you can decide to follow it or not."

She nodded thoughtfully. "I see what he saw in you Zoe. He always said you made him a better person and I just thought he was full of shit. I see it now though." She smiled at me and turned to go then stopped and turned back. "Watch out for Christina and Al. Not many people know about it but Al only came here because she asked him to. She thought having a big friend of her own would help her if she needed it later…if you know what I mean?"

I let my wicked grin cross my face because this absolutely fucking pleased me. I saw her pale "Oh Molly." I drawl that out. "I am so fucking counting on it."

She studied me again and nodded then smiled. "I think I like you Zoe." Then she turned and walked out of the dorm room. Eric had come in smirking.

"Well that was fucking interesting." He muttered and I turned red wondering how much he heard. "Come on Zoe. I feel we have a lot more to talk about than I first thought." He took my bundle and put it into a large backpack type bag and put it over one shoulder. He took my hand and leaned in to kiss me softly.

"You do have a way of bringing out the best in people Zoe." He whispered then pulled me along with him gently.

I was still trying to figure out how much he had heard of everything that was said.

We get to the dining hall and he tells me to go ahead to grab my food first. He then goes and leans down to talk to Logan and Four. They start to frown and put their heads together. Tris came up and joined me as I got my food.

"You ok Zoe?" She looked at me worriedly.

"I am. When I get mad it can pass quickly if I channel it properly. I was angry a lot when I was younger so found working out and sparring helped. I also like to draw and that helped. What did you do when you were angry or frustrated?" I asked her as I picked up some grilled chicken and grilled veggies and rice. I grabbed an oat muffin and some fruit and I looked over sauces and grinned when I saw they had a ghost pepper one.

"Hell Yes!" I yell and open the bottle right there and sprinkle it over all my food except for the fruit and muffin.

I soon feel someone beside me other than Tris and look over my shoulder to see Eric laughing. "I knew it couldn't be good to elicit that type of yell. Everyone in the dining hall heard that by the way." He motioned behind him and everyone was looking our way.

I turned red and held up the bottle. "Ghost Pepper. Fucking amazing!" Then I shrug and turn back to Tris as the laughter goes in waves in the dining hall.

"Another thing I should stay away from?" She smirked.

"Hell yes! Stay far away from it. In fact you might want to back away. No seriously. I will have to wash like my hands and face thoroughly after eating. Dad let me try it once but I got this 20 minute lecture about the proper uses and handling of it. It is some serious shit." I grin mischievously.

"I sense a prank and story behind that smile cousin. But someone is looking impatient so I will let you guys go. See you in the morning?" She asked worriedly.

"If not tonight…" a throat clears behind me "...or tomorrow works too. Oh here are your protein things. Will you do me a favor? Could you have Peter or Edward sleep in my bunk below you please? I don't trust Chris or Al with you alone." I dig in my pocket and pull them out and hand them to her." She smiles and hugs me tightly.

"I love you Zoe. I will ask Peter to sleep in your bunk but I will be fine. You just be careful ok?" She gives Eric a smile and walks away.

"Ready?" Eric says as he takes my box from me and puts it in a bag with his food.

"Yeah." I say softly with a frown. I am suddenly now nervous.

He takes my hand as I wave to our group and walk out with him. "I don't plan on ravishing you or anything Zoe, if you are nervous about that."

I frown then pout. "Why don't you plan on ravishing me?"

He blushes a little causing me to bite my lip at that. "Not that I wouldn't really fucking love too but we have stuff to talk about and you are…"

Now I am blushing "Is it that obvious?"

"No. I mean I didn't think you were exactly the sleep around type girl either. Let's just say I picked up on a few hints." He was avoiding looking at me and I knew he was lying about something.

"What kind of hints Eric?" I ask in a surprisingly soft voice considering I was working up into being pissed.

He just kept walking and leading me to his apartment. He opened the door and let me in first and went to put our food on a table in a small dining area next to his kitchen. The apartment was pretty nice. The living room was big with a couch that formed a big L shape and was centered around a big TV on the wall with bookshelves flanking it and running under it too. The furniture was black but it wasn't oppressing or depressing.

He had throw pillows around it in shades of teal and a huge rug on the wood floors that was filled with large geometric shapes in greys and teals too. I frowned at it because I had something like it and the pillows in my bunker. The art he has on his walls makes my breath almost catch as I see things that were also on a wall in the living room of my bunker.

"Amar helped me set up the apartment. I was just going to go with black everything and forget any kind of colors. But he just led me to some stuff and said that I would need all the happiness I could get and to pick out things that I thought meant happiness. I am guessing by your frown and the huge grin he got when I picked this stuff out that it has some significance?" He said after taking my bag to his room.

"I have stuff like this in my bunker and I had it at my adoptive parents place. Teal and silver or grey are my favorite colors." No need to mention that it was actually blue/grey and had been for as long as I could remember. Or that he had replicated some of the paintings here he had done there but when he shouldn't remember. I could tell by the raised eyebrow and piercing he knew I was leaving something out.

"Let's eat and talk I guess. I am going to grab something for us to drink. I think we will need it." He mumbled and walked into his kitchen and started rifling through bottles of alcohol. I shook my head and went to sit down and set up his box and silverware and then mine.

He came back in and placed a glass of what looked to be coke with ice. I smiled because I could smell the rum. "Your first official Dauntless rum and coke." He winked at me.

I smiled "Thank you." I sipped it a little bit and sighed when I felt that wonderful burn going down my throat. That was the part I liked about drinking. It felt like it was warming me for the inside out. I could do without all the rest of it to be honest. I did like the taste of good rum, scotch, or whiskey but I didn't drink to get drunk.

We sat and ate in the quiet for a bit but Eric had moved to be closer to my side and was holding my hand while we ate. "You don't give yourself slack when you are training do you?" He said looking over my food selections again.

I shake my head with my forehead furrowed. "Not necessarily true. I knew we would be possibly drinking tonight and chose to not indulge in other things when I would be doing that later. I look at it as tradeoffs or even a balance."

"Like when you were telling us about the prank? You had to do something good because you had done something bad?" He looked over at me as he took a sip his drink.

"Yeah. I don't know, it just feels like I have put both out there because if I don't and all I put out there is bad it will come back one me tenfold. But at the same time, it just isn't reality to think that every person is all full of goodness and sunshine all the time. I am a mixture of both and sometimes one is more than the other." I take a sip of my drink.

"When I look back at growing up in Erudite and how I was treated all I could feel was that part that wanted to see others hurt just as bad if not more as I was. Somewhere in there was a feeling of that lessening for a while. But that last year there I thought she was the reason for it lessening. She certainly made it seem like it. How fucking honored I felt when she singled me out. I was going to be her champion here. Not only that but she kept saying that when it came time I would be there by her side to rule over it all. I fucking wanted that so bad Zoe. To see every fucking person in this damn city fear and bow before me. I am not even going to lie, I still get a rush when they all cower from me. The fear I can inspire, it can be like a drug. It is also hollow as fuck and it makes me hate myself for wanting that."

I smile at him in understanding. "I know how all of that is. To want to make someone hurt worse than they ever made you feel. I have killed her and a few others in my mind a million ways. None of them merciful or pretty Eric. I was not lying about the darkness part. My mind can go to some very dark places. But I had Edward and Mayra, Amar, Peter and Taylor his sister. And I had you too Eric, there in Erudite." I grab my drink and walk over to the couch frowning and curl my feet under me. I had finished as much as I would be able to eat anyways.

He sighs and joins me pulling me to his side. "How did that happen?"

"Because I was a ten year old pest and I encountered a certain blond haired boy looking through martial arts movies. Even then you had the whole intimidating scowl, and the eyebrow down. I wanted a movie and wouldn't back down when you insisted a 'little girl' like me wouldn't know what to do with that." I grinned at the memory and looked over at him to see his face full of fury.

"We have known each other for eight years and she took it all?" His voice took on the quality mine had earlier when I am beyond angry and am so calm about it. It is when I am at most dangerous and he was always the same way too.

"Yes. Because she couldn't let me be happy and because she could use you against me. But also because she could use you when you came here. I didn't know about the plans to be honest. Not until after it was too late. Amar figured that part out when I got access to the systems we needed after that prank. She had used a memory serum on you Eric. Three nights previous to that prank. You looked right through me when you saw me next. Didn't even know who I was. And at first I tried to talk to you but that didn't work out so well." I whispered as I stared forward.

"Was that who you meant when you said to Molly that they could look right through you? Did I hurt you?" He looked at me with pain in his eyes.

"Yes it was you and no not physically. But it was a big blow to lose your friendship." I stopped and sighed and took a sip of my drink. "Losing you hurt badly and Amar was torn up over it too. That was part of why he understood about me needing to do something. It felt good but hollow at the same time. The rumor Chris had started was what started her notice of you. Because she had spread the rumor that you and I were having sex and were together. She had never even met either of us. But apparently she liked someone that I guess had a crush on me. She was vicious about it too and didn't even hide she was the one saying it all. That whole being transparent thing I guess." I had reached for his hand and was gently massaging it while talking.

"How did I know Amar from before here?" He frowned.

"We should go get that stuff Eric." I looked at him pointedly.

He nodded then went and grabbed another bag and flashlight. We left the apartment and went to the room I had been to on what seemed like forever ago but was only last night.

I led him to far corner of the room where a small bricked in cupboard was. I started to pry the loose bricks out. He knelt beside me and moved my hands then started to get the larger stones out of the way until a pretty good opening was made. He took his flashlight and clicked it on and I gasped when the light hit familiar leather.

"I couldn't see that far back." My voice was shaky from tears that threatened to burst forth. Eric smiled sadly and reached in to pull all the stuff from the back forward.

He picked up the beat up black leather jacket that Amar loved and cherished. It had been his father's before him and it was an almost daily part of his appearance. Eric handed the jacket to me and I touched it but then shook my head.

"He wanted you to have it Eric." I whispered.

I don't know what I was expecting but it wasn't for Eric to drop the jacket and then pull me to him and kiss me roughly holding to me tightly.

Just like before I was matching the parts of us the darker and primal parts of ourselves. They called to each other and brought each other forward. Like the dark though the more gentle parts called to each other too. So when the rough brutal passion subsided we were left gently kissing and holding each other.

"I can't take it unless you want me to Zoe. It is important to me to know you want me to have that and that part of you." He whispered hoarsely.

"I want you to have it Eric. No one could fill it or wear it that I would ever be happy with but you." I gasped as he took my mouth again in a kiss that was so gentle it truly left me breathless and dizzy.

We broke apart and I could feel him smile against my neck when he buried his head there in the crook of my neck for a moment. His breath on my bare skin sent shivers of pleasure down my spine and the smile turned into a smirk before he pulled back.

"Let's get this stuff in the bag and go back to my place to go through it." He smiled at me knowingly and loving the effect he had on me.

I blushed and rolled my eyes. "Ok. I just need to make sure the weapons have no ammo in the chamber and are on safety. Don't want one to discharge on accident."

He frowned but nodded."Why would he leave these if you have more at the bunker?"

I smiled at him. "Men and their favorites. You know he always treated these as if they were his lovers."

He chuckled then winked. "Well, the better you know your weapon the better she will perform when you squeeze and stroke her."

I laughed because that was exactly something my father would say. "He would love that analogy."

He smirked "I know."

I rolled my eyes again and smiled. We started to put everything in the bag. Instead of putting the pistols in the bag I took one and made sure the safety was on and no bullets chambered. Checked the ammo mag and then tucked into my waistband. Eric had done the same thing almost as soon as I did as well.

I looked at Eric as he closed the bag and I took his hand, looking at him seriously. "With the guns he left us. Forget slitting her throat. This is how it will end if she can't be brought to justice."

His eyes became hard and he nodded solemnly. "I was thinking the exact same thing. What better justice than to end her with his own instruments of death."

I nodded as he smiled at me and I returned it. Anyone looking at us and those smiles would probably have shit their pants seeing it. I meant what I said to Four. I am not a nice girl and I have killed before to protect. I will again.

The only difference between me and my mother is that I don't lie about myself or motivations. I don't embrace the insanity within myself like she does but I don't deny the necessity to end a life if it is required.

He pulls me up with him as we stand and we walk out of the room not even caring that we didn't brick everything back up. As I walk beside him I can't help but notice that I was exactly correct. No one else could wear my father's jacket like he does.

We get back to his apartment and still have a little while before Logan and Milla will be there. I clean up the dinner we abandoned and put aside the fruit and muffin into his almost barren refrigerator. I chuckle that his cabinet has five bottles of hot sauce in it and he is well stocked with coffee.

"I am going to go get a shower if that is ok with you?" I say as he is taking everything out of the bag and I notice he is holding the pictures I meant for him to see. The reason I insisted we go get everything.

I walk over and sit beside him on the bed and look at the one he is holding. The picture of Eric and I on top of the Amity Bridge smiling big. Eric is barely 15 years old. It was one of the last pictures we would ever have together.

He has me pulled close to his side and we are beaming, looking out over the water and each other. Excited for our first jump from the bridge. My father had caught the picture without us knowing and almost from the side. It caught all the feeling we had in that moment. How alive and happy we both were. You could practically see the anticipation coursing through us.

"Zoe, were we together?" He asked quietly.

I shook my head. "No. I was still pretty young and had no self-esteem to speak of really. Sometimes I think you wanted to ask me but I think you just understood I wasn't ready for that. Other times I was sure you saw me as a sister and nothing more. I'm not sure because it isn't like I am fountain of openness with my feelings and you weren't exactly either."

"I think I might have wanted to be. I can't see me having that smile and look on my face looking at you and not feeling that way." His fingers traced my face and smile as he spoke. I tried not to concentrate on that. The young girl's dreams that I had never believed was in the realm of possibilities. Back then I was just happy to have him in my life at all.

I picked up a few more pictures out of the box that they were in. "This was my first weekend with Amar. I was seven and he had found me just a few months previous. We camped out at Amity since we hadn't found the bunker yet. We wouldn't find it until I was 11. I shocked him I think because he thought I wouldn't want to have anything to do with him. I guess he thought I would think he abandoned me or that I would hate him. But I never did. My adoptive mother, before she was killed, had told me about who I was and who my father was. She had been friends with Jeanine and Andrew. Andrew Prior, my uncle, had introduced them because the girl he was falling in love with Natalie Foster was best friends with Amar. So the Erudite siblings fell in love with the two Dauntless-born. Andrew and Natalie chose to leave their factions and start over together. Amar had already struggled with leaving Dauntless. It truly was his blood. It was everything that was good and bad about him. He loved Jeanine though and he knew she wouldn't survive in Dauntless. She could be ruthless and cold but she wasn't brave or strong. He was smart enough that had he gone to Erudite, like she demanded, he would have been ok in that department. But it would have been like it was for you Eric. He would never have truly fit in. Not because both of you are divergent..."

He stiffened and scowled at me. "I was tested Zoe, I was told..."

"Of course she would tell you that you weren't. She couldn't exactly tell you that Divergents are dangerous but make an exception for you. Could she? She needed your Erudite intelligence and she needed your Dauntless aptitude. So those tests she disregarded as irrelevant." I finished bitterly.

"Are you?" He asked quietly.

I took a deep breath and looked him dead in the eye. "It runs in my family, both sides. Yes, I am."

His eyes got the calculating look in them and he was connecting the dots. "You wanted to protect her and you needed to bring her in early. That is why you are so insistent you train her in everything. Why you are trying to turn her abnegation selflessness to incorporate the Dauntless aspect?"

I nod and hold his eyes."And because everything she is I am too. We are both divergent in three ways. Trinity was the name I was given and that is why I was given that name Eric. Because he was divergent in three ways and so was I. She had me tested from birth almost."

His breathing was labored and his jaw clenched. "Why would she do all of this?"

"Because she is Nero and we are Rome. She wants to see this city burn. He chose Dauntless and for that she has never forgiven him, me or the faction system. The biggest joke of it all is that she spouts that she is trying to protect the system but really she is trying to bring it down at any opportunity she gets."

I sigh and get up. "I need to get a shower and changed before they get here. Is that ok?"

He nods and puts everything back except two pictures. The one of us on the bridge and one of him and Amar on that same bridge but facing to me and smiling. Those he puts onto a shelf of a bookcase in his room.

Once he places them he walks to me and pulls me close to him. He reaches up and pulls my hair from its braid and binding. Then runs his hands through it gently, letting his hands drift down my neck. He pulls back and smiles at me. "Breath Zoe." He whispers and I realize I had been holding my breath. I drag in much needed air and blush.

He takes my hand then leads me to the door with his bathroom and opens it. He goes to a set of painted grey built in cabinets and pulls out two big towels and a wash cloth. He sets them on the counter and then steps out and grabs my bag for me. He hands it in and smiles at me.

"I'll just be out here I am going to do some paperwork for the initiates in the room next door. I have an office in here or I might never get sleep."

I nod and turn. I start to unzip the jacket and pull it off when I feel him behind me. I look in the mirror and he moves my hair from the back of my neck. Holding my eyes through the mirror he lowers his mouth and starts to gently kiss, lick and suck on the back of my neck.

The moment his lips touched my skin I lost all breath and my eyes closed. My body swayed and I couldn't help the soft moans that escaped from me at the feel of his breath, warm lips and skin against mine. His hands went to the hem of my tank top and started to lift it up sliding his hands over the exposed skin just above the leggings I was wearing today up my abdomen and stomach. I reached my hands back to grip him for support and pull him closer.

I heard him suck in breath and lift his lips from my neck to pull me against him, wrapping his arms around me from behind. I could feel his heart beating rapidly against my back and we were both struggling for breath. I finally opened my eyes again to look in the mirror to see my own heavy lidded eyes and parted lips mirroring his.

I had never felt desire as keenly as I do with him, nor at any other time in our interactions before either. I swallow and gain some breathing normality but it hasn't quenched the fire I feel burning in me.

I see him mirror that action and then close his eyes and try to gain his control back too. With one movement he steps back as if it took a great effort and I sway forward to grip the bathroom counter and lean on it. I hear the door click closed behind me and don't look up again for a few moments.

Finally when I have myself under some control I busy myself with my shower and setting out the things I will need. I pull my toiletries out and set the shampoo and conditioner out where I can reach them easily. I take out the body wash and put it on the bathroom shelf in the shower meant for those things with the wash cloth beside it. I take the toothpaste and toothbrush out and squeeze a bit onto the brush then set it on the shelf next to the body wash. I take out my clothes I will be wearing and lay them out.

I put my socks and boots next to the door. I strip out of all my days clothes and fold them neatly and set them on the toilet to wait for me to put them back into the bag when I get out. I move the towels to the best position for me when I get out and then I turn the shower on and get it to the scalding temperature I feel in need of. I step in and let the water cascade over me running my fingers through my hair and massaging my scalp.

This routine soothes me. To reassure me I am still whole and not burning to ashes from the inside. The feelings of desire that are ruling my body are foreign and terrifying only in the aspect that they feel all consuming. As if control will be completely out of my hands and that is the terrifying part. That and the feeling that it will become an inferno that will never be quenched. Is this was it feels like for everyone? How does anyone survive encounters like that?

Was this what it was like for her with my father? Was she so consumed by that inferno that it burned away any trace of love she could have felt for me?

For the first time in my life, and for some reason I don't understand, I shed tears for the loss of a mother and her love. Even as I am cleansing my body I feel that I am cleansing a part of my soul I didn't know needed to be.

I let the tears fall silently and the soft and quiet sobs to shake through my body. By the time I am clean I turn the water to cold and then allow it to run over my face to help with any traces of the sadness and tears that I had given in to.

Once done I turn the water off and towel dry my hair with the other towel wrapped around me. I start to gather all my toiletries and dry them off and pack them back up.

I get dressed and look at my reflection. I grab some of the makeup Lauren and Mar had insisted I get and start to apply a bit of makeup to cover any trace of the path of my tears. Blush for color, a bit of eyeliner she insisted all Dauntless women should have and finally mascara to lengthen the lashes and she said was waterproof.

Lastly I dabbed on a bit of color on my lips. I take in my look now and am satisfied with how the black sleeveless crop top fits me and the jeans aren't super skin tight but tight enough that they hug my curves.

My hair looks less like a wild tangle and more soft curls. I give myself a nod and stamp of approval and put the towels in his hamper then pack everything in my bag. I take a deep breath before I open the door and walk out.

I put my bag on a chair in his room and take out my long sleeved leather jacket. Then I step into the living room playing with the chain and ring necklace. It is the only jewelry I have and I frown in thought. I can't wait for fights to be over so I can get the piercings I want. I have wanted small gauges for forever and I want a few helix piercings. Not to mention I want to get my nose pierced.

I guess I took longer in the shower than I planned because Logan and Milla are already there sitting on the couch and Eric comes out of the kitchen and stops when he sees me.

"Wow" He clears his throat looking at me. "You look. You look amazing Zoe." He says with a slight smile but desire clear in his eyes.

I blush a bit. "I thought it was time I looked a bit more Dauntless. Can't wait for fights to be over though. I really want my gauges and my nose pierced. And I think a few dermals maybe on my neck." I shrug and finally drag my eyes away from Eric and over to Logan and Milla who have big shit eating grins on their faces. I roll my eyes and laugh. "Enjoying the show guys?"

Logan sat back and pulled Milla against his side smiling still. "Immensely." He smirked and drank from a glass on the table next to him.

I gave a small bow from the waist. "So glad to entertain Sirrah"

Milla laughed and her laugh was as beautiful as her. I knew she was from Amity from when she was telling stories and I couldn't really see it. She just looked so wild and untamed. Her beautiful blue eyes raged with every emotion and could be seen clearly. Her lips were quick to smile but could cut a man in half if she needed to. She reminded me exactly of someone I had seen in a movie. It was called The Fifth Element and the main heroine was almost an exact replica Milla. But she was just so much more vivacious and witty than the character in the movie.

Eric handed me a drink he had been apparently been making me when he was in the kitchen. I smiled and took it and started to sip it. I tasted whiskey instead of rum and I closed my eyes and hummed and sighed.

"Wow you were not lying." Milla looks at me in a decidedly lustful way.

Logan smiled and Eric growled which made Logan and Milla laugh.

"I don't think I even want to know." I shook my head and tossed my jacket on the couch and went to sit by Eric who had taken a seat before me. He wrapped an arm around me and leaned his head against my hair and inhaled then pressed a kiss to my temple.

Logan smirked "So where is this rumored bunker that we are going to."

I let my little grin cross my face "You up for rappelling?" I tilt my head and see Milla's eyes light up and Logan shake his head.

He takes tosses back his drink "Try me" and smirks at me.

Eric shakes his head and drinks deeply from his glass and I take bigger drinks and then say. "No time like the present then" And wink at them.

We exit the compound and I look at my watch. "Fuck. Ok we have to run for it…" And no sooner than I spoke is the train is already on us. I take off at full speed and grin as Eric is right there with me.

I laugh and kick it up and hear him curse. Still laughing, I leap up and grab the handle hitting the button at the same time and swinging in with Eric seconds behind me. Logan leaps up and steps back as I see Milla swing in swiftly and does a bit of an acrobatic tumble pops up smiling. My smile matches hers and we laugh together.

I go to the car door and watch as the city goes past and finally as we get close to the broken down ruins of the amusement park and old rides.

"We jump just after the park." I call out looking to my side as Eric stands next to me and nods and grins. I know we have another competition on our hands. We get ready to pass and I back up several feet. Without even telling him I run full tilt and jump out and high.

I do a bit of my own acrobatics and land in a roll then pop up and start running off the rest of the momentum. I turn back to face the others and see Eric slowing down near me shaking his head.

"Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" He said but his grin told me he loved every minute of that.

"You loved it Coulter, so don't try and give me that." I said laughing and panting with excitement.

Milla and Logan catch up to us laughing and holding hands. "I knew I was going to love you when we sat with you the first time. Well, that and when Logan came to find me to tell me all about the sassy initiate that had caught our Eric's eye." She smiled at my blush.

Eric pulled me to him briefly and kissed me. Again I was struck by how fucking sexy he looks in moments like these especially. His eyes look like steel and you can just see and feel power oozing from him when he moves and speaks.

He took my hand and we headed to one of the string of wrecked buildings in this area. It looked like they used be some kind of houses that were tall. So I guess they had several families living in them. Just past that was open land and what had been some sort of string of factories. Maybe for car construction based on all the chains that hung from different levels.

Amar and I could never figure it out. What we had figured out was that before the war it was converted into some sort of club and whoever did that had put in some kind of underground storage area and bunker. We only found it because we were camping out in the warehouse area part and heard the loud breaking of concrete as some of the cranes and chains in the area above it had broken through the floor.

"It's in that shit hole?" Eric scoffed and I frowned at him.

"Considering that shit hole had a room in it for you Eric and was and is still kind of my own home, I would say you could save the criticism." I snapped a bit snarky.

"Shit. I'm sorry. I just hate thinking of you having lived all the fucking way out here with no one to help you." He frowns and squeezes my hand.

I shake my head "It's fine. You have that flashlight?"

He nods and pulls it from the bag he had strapped to his shoulder. I pull the pistol from my waistband I had tucked it into before we had walked out. I flicked off the safety and took the flashlight then held it right beside my pistol.

"Nice, fucking nice" I hear him grumble and pull his.

"Logan, you might want to pull yours. And keep Milla back, have her shine her flashlight. I don't expect trouble since I cleared out the last group, but you never know." I say quietly.

"Last group?" Eric says from beside me covering the side.

"Factionless have started to move to areas they don't normally go to. They normally don't come to this part because this is considered Dauntless turf. It was the biggest reason Amar and I choose this place. He was still close enough if he got called back to the compound and knew we were safe here." I say softly.

The section that the floor had been broken through Amar and I had rigged up with a pneumatic door that was security encoded so that no one could get access to it without being imprinted in.

I handed Eric the flashlight I had and clicked the safety back on. Then I tucked the gun into the waistband of my jeans. He shined the light where I was kneeling. I pulled back the false bit of refuse and dirt I had created on a bit of thick cloth that was normally too heavy to move by just stumbling on it.

It only pulled back enough to expose the part of the door the panel I needed was on and then with the magnets in place would go back in place on its own.

"Wow that was pretty clever use of disguise. This door doesn't look original." Logan said kneeling down beside it.

I was feeling around for the catch for the hidden panel. "It isn't. When we decided we wanted this place we knew we needed better security. They have a welding station and a bunch of other things. Even something you can machine parts on. So we rigged it up. It's pneumatic and opens up outward. I got it set up…" I clicked the panel open and it revealed the screen I had swiped from the Erudite labs "...for bio signatures."

I finish as I put my hand on the screen it reads my hand and then I type in the algorithm I had set up as the password.

"Of course I also added a complicated algorithm password just in case someone tried to get their way in by stealing my prints. That would be a fucking nasty surprise for them." I chuckled as the door started to give its air hiss and open up. Once it was up, I pushed a series of three holes in that gave a command for some illumination from our target area.

Eric looked down, smiling and Logan looking impressed.

"Milla and Logan, you guys can go first. I have to be last to set the door closed since it is bio scanned as well." I pulled the two rappelling harnesses and got Milla set up. Logan got himself set then he checked Milla and shrugged at me apologetically.

"I wouldn't expect anything less and I don't take offense to it. Gotta protect those we love." I smiled at him and they both set off going down. I chuckled as I heard Milla going fast and Logan cursing for her to slow it down.

"How did Logan and I end up with girls who are bigger adrenaline junkies than us?" Eric smirked at me.

"You still know you love it Coulter. You need competition. It's in your DNA." I smirk back at him.

"Only because it's you. Anyone else and I would probably be pissed." He frowned.

I bump against him and smile. "I like being able to compete against you. I like you don't feel threatened by me or it." I shrug then bend down to hit the retract button to pull up the lines. I stand back up and he pulls me close to his side and presses a kiss to my temple again.

"I like it too. I have to admit I was turned on as hell trying to beat you to the train." He laughed, making me smile. He seemed so much more relaxed and I loved seeing him like this. I loved being like this with him again.

When the lines came up he got himself settled in. I strapped in and then looked over to make sure he was secure. He winked at me and took off.

I slapped my hand on the screen, the door hissed closing and I let myself go down too. I didn't engage the rappelling break once and ran along the wall when it came closer. Then I started to slow my decent bit by bit.

The lines don't go all the way down. There is about a 2 ft drop so I immediately hit the clasps and dropped. I rolled on landing to not hurt my ankles or feet.

"You could have warned me about the drop Zoe." Logan scowls but Milla is laughing.

"Let me guess, she did something like I did but with a flip?" I smirked when he frowned.

"How did you know that?" He frowned at me.

"Because I usually do the exact same thing. Great minds think alike." I say and wink at her.

They follow me down a tunnel that leads a bit more down and then to the thick door. I hit the catch for the panel and do the same thing but a different algorithm and the door hisses open.

We enter into a huge cavern like area with my restored dirt bikes and a four wheeler to the left with various other projects in different states. I see their eyes light up and I am happy that someone has an appreciation for it all.

"Do these run?" Milla runs to the bikes like a kid on Christmas in the movies.

I laugh at her excitement and let my own show too. "Yes the two smaller skinnier bikes are called dirt bikes. They are freaking awesome to take on dirt paths and do all kinds of stunts on them. The four wheeler is fun too. Just a bit tame for me." I smile at her.

"This one." I walk over to what was called a Harley Davidson. "I am still working on. I'm having issues with the throttle and fuel mixture. I don't want to convert it to power. It would lose its appeal and torque to be honest." I shrug and frown at my longest and most confusing project.

"Were they all down here?" Eric asked. I frowned and sighed that he couldn't remember it all.

He looked at me and could tell I was sad. He nodded in understanding. "I should remember and I really wish I could Zoe. I'm sorry this is hard for you." He pulled me to him by my hand and I nodded.

"Nothing we can do about it now." I smile sadly at him and use my head to indicate a set of doors off to the side.

We all head to the doors that are on that left and walk into the living quarter's area. It is still tall in ceilings but it is also very warm feeling. The furniture is composed of a huge grey couch in the L sectional with a huge ottoman and a mixture of teal and blue throw pillows. The same rug that Eric has in his apartment covers the concrete floor but it is larger. There is a huge TV on the wall and bookcases that reach up to the ceiling are filled with books and collections of vid discs.

On one entire concrete wall is a mural. The most prominent part of it is a tall building with three figures standing beside each other, towering over the cityscape below. Up the side of the building is the Dauntless symbol and flames.

The figures are that of one man in the exact image of my father the last day I saw him, with his crinkled eyes and lopsided smile. The young man beside him is the exact image of Eric, the last time I saw him at Erudite after he had already become a leader. His hair was in the style he used to prefer. But he was smiling down at the figure of the girl who would be my exact image. Now her face is obscured by her hair caught in the wind. The only part visible is the eyes and a slight smile on the face. I hadn't been able to face seeing myself with them both after they had both gone from me. So I had painted over it with my hair instead.

"You did all this?" Milla asked breathlessly as she took in the fields of Amity. Then she smirked at the scene I had placed in one of the fields in the night time part of the wall. I had put in a representation of a Dauntless/Amity rave.

"I did most of it. Some I painted over what was there before. Some of it …" I looked at Eric and his eyes widened.

"I did some of this?" He said in wonder and walked to put a hand on the wall.

"You don't recognize the patterns in the field?" I pointed to the nighttime Amity scene again. There, made from the fields, was the maze pattern on his forearms.

He ran his fingers lightly over it. I walked away not able to handle the sadness I was feeling at the moment.

I walked to the huge open kitchen area and opened the cabinet to pull out the whiskey I kept there and got out some shot glasses. Then I took down some tequila. Milla seemed like a tequila girl.

I poured us all out shots and slammed down one before Logan and Milla walked over to the island counter I was standing at.

"I don't have limes Milla but I do have salt." I said as I handed her the salt shaker smiling.

I poured myself another shot and tossed it back and slammed the glass down.

"I am going to go to my old room for a second. I need to check on something." I wipe my mouth and walk down the stone hallway that is on the opposite side of the living room and follow it to the familiarity of my room and push the door open. I walk up to the small study area I have set up at the back of the room and turn on the lamps then power up my computer.

"What are you up to lately Mother Dearest?" I snarl out. I need to check to this but I also need to do something to channel my hurt I am feeling at the moment.

The computer powers up and I pull in the server I need. As this is all coming together I hear a light rapping of knuckles on the door frame. Without looking up I know it is Eric. "Come on in Eric."

I keep my eyes on the screen and try not to have a flashback to one of the last times he was in my room. The room and man had changed and I guess so did I.

The wall behind my bed has another mural but this was more of a fantasy driven one. It combined things I loved. Scenes from martial arts movies, or a scene with Elves gliding through an ancient forest lit by floating specks of light. I have a representation of Neverland with the mermaids lounging on rocks and the wild terrain along with pirate ships sailing along.

There is even a scene that I had done from Pinocchio. It was of a battered Pinocchio being held over a chasm with strings still attached. But in the background was his shadow. The shadow Pinocchio showed a much taller and straighter Pinocchio. A large pair of scissors was shown in the shadow shapes having just cut the strings that once bound him to another's will.

Eric stood before that one the longest. "When did you do this?" His voice was almost awed and tight with emotion.

"The day I knew you were safe from her again and I moved in here for good." I said softly still not fully looking at him.

I saw his nod from the corner of my eye and the sadness of his expression. Then his eyes were caught by the image of a boy and a girl sitting under a tree. The boy has his arms around the girl and she is sitting in between his legs. They are in the middle of laughter at something they are reading from a book that is propped on her legs. It was a young Eric and I. I had almost painted over it but could never bring myself to.

"You did that one. You said I needed something in here of yours. So you painted it in the Neverland I created and said it would always point my way home when I had a nightmare and you couldn't be here." I whispered and he ran his hands over it and frowned. I could tell it hurt him to see it. To see something he had no memory of but should.

"What are you doing Zoe?" He finally said as he came up to stand beside me. When he saw what I was doing his expression darkened. He growled and ran a hand through his hair. "Dammit Zoe!"

"I'm not going to stop. So you can pull up that chair in the corner, help and observe or go see your old room. It has your drawings on it so you should be able to find it." I mutter trying to get my sadness under control still.

I hear the chair scraping and then him sitting close beside me. "Is that what I think it is?" He growls with a scowl on his face.

I nod with my own scowl. "The control serum she is still trying to get ready? Yes that's it. She has been having a string of decidedly bad luck though. That is the bad thing about Erudite. They rely too heavily on their own technology but believe there could be no person that would possibly be able to understand it."

I move my hands quickly as I make minute changes all throughout the code and programming on several fronts. The serum calculations, the programming for the actual sim that it would put the subject under, the command codes, how to disable to command codes, how to start up the command codes, the type of codes that can be executed. All of that I make small changes that wouldn't be detected but all together throw it all off.

"Change the area of effect just enough that it disables where it would be most needed; Abnegation. She looks like she is going to target them. If the range works up until then she won't be the wiser but when they get there it will disable and she won't be able to recall them." Eric suggests. I nod then make the recalculations and adjustments. I made it so that no matter where she deploys from as soon as they reach Abnegation it would disable. "I am concerned about the amount of reports she has on Factionless activity."

He nods in thought and I can see his mind calculating as well. "You said they had gotten more active lately and we have been getting that Intel too. You think she might be trying something with them?"

"She wants Divergents. Before now she went to them to get her test subjects. I don't know if it is just that or something else. Think about this though, if she can't use Dauntless, who does she plan to use?" I look at him and his nostrils flare in anger.

"Son of a bitch!" He cusses loudly then shakes his head, trying to get his breathing under control. "Well then, I guess you and I will just have to keep a close eye on things with this." I nod and keep working.

It took less than 20 minutes and then I was done. "You want to get Logan in here and see if he wants to look around in their files for anything Intel wise? I don't know the control room set up or Dauntless servers so I don't know what would benefit him."

He looks at me for a long moment but I can't figure out what he is thinking. "They are exploring the bunker and the equipment area for right now, until then..." He trails off, reaches over and picks me up as he moves me to sit in his lap.

He reaches behind me to take the gun out of my waistband and puts it on my desk then moves the jacket off of me. Once that is done he takes the jacket he now claims as his and sets that aside and puts his own gun next to mine.

He grasps my face on each side and brings me in for a heated kiss, plundering my mouth. He moves his hands to my waist, lifting my shirt until he pulls back from the kiss and holds my eyes with his own and lifts it over my head.

I see his chest start to heave and notice mine does too. I pull him to me for another kiss by the back of his neck. He growls in pleasure and I move my hands to tug at his shirt until he breaks away and whips it over his head. We sit with my legs wrapped around his waist, straddling him as he sits in the chair.

My hands move to his back as I explore the muscles there. His own hands have moved up my ribs and sides and his fingers graze along the material of the fancy bra I have on instead of my normal sports bra. It acts like a push up bra and makes my boobs look bigger and fuller. I moan against his mouth at the feel of his fingers lightly raking against my skin and my own fingers rake against his back.

He growls and stands holding me firmly against him. He shoves the chair back with his foot and then walks us over to my bed and lays me down on it. Then he follows me closely, claiming my mouth again before moving back to kiss on my neck. Whatever we would or would not have done is interrupted as we hear the sound of laughter coming from the kitchen area and Eric rests his head against my shoulder.

"Fuck." He pants against my skin. "Gods Zoe, I want you so bad." He growls as he plants small kisses on my shoulder. "But it can't be like this all hurried and I want you to want it too." His voice is strained and husky.

I try to catch my breath and run my fingers through his hair. "I don't think I have ever wanted something so much Eric. I feel like it is just going to burn me up from the inside." I gasp out as he moves back to gently kiss my neck and I feel his smile.

I hear the combined laughter of Milla and Logan. Eric pulls back and looks down at me with a small smile on his face. "Later for sure but if I don't get up right now we won't be leaving this room until tomorrow morning."

He moves against me and I feel the obvious show of how much he wants me at that moment. I let out a gasp and moan. My back arches a little bit and his eyes darken more as he moves against me again. My fingers dig into his back and arm. I grab them as if for dear life. Just the feel of him pressing through his jeans and mine is causing me to moan in pleasure and frustration.

"Eric." I moan begging for something but not knowing what.

"Zoe, baby..." he groans, trailing before his lips crash against mine again. The next time we pull apart he cusses because Logan is calling for him to come see something.

"I am so fucking going to kill him." He growls. I pant and laugh at the same time. He raises his eyebrow at me then leans back on his knees and looks down at me while I look at him without his shirt on.

I bite my lip as I take in his toned abs and muscles. I take in the tattoo of the quote we both now use as a motto along his ribs on his left side. The tattoo of dauntless flames that climbs up from his hip and probably lower up his other side and ribs. I lick my lips as I see a slight outline of hair that goes from his navel into his pants.

"Fuck it! He can wait." He snaps out in a growl as he jumps up and goes and slams my door. He locks it and comes back over to me. His mouth comes crashing back to my mouth. After a while he pulls away slightly. "If you want me to stop tell me now Zoe and I will. but it has to be now before we go any further. Fuck if I like it Zoe, but I have no control when it comes to you."

I pull him back to me and claim his mouth just as fiercely in answer. My tongue now plundering his, tasting the whiskey he must have taken before he came to my room. My hands roam over his chest and sides as his go lower to the zipper of my pants. I break the kiss and gasp as his hand moves into my jeans to brush against where all the heat in my body seems to be centered in.

"Eric." I pant against his shoulder as he kisses my neck and down to the mounds of my breasts. He hand is ghosting and teasing over the fabric and my body is straining upward searching for something.

"Baby you are so fucking beautiful." He whispers against my neck as his hand moves under the fabric that separated it from my center. I gasp even louder and my back arches as he finds the core of my center. I feel him smile against my neck.

"Breathe Baby." He whispers with his smile still in place. I draw a ragged breath in and moan as his hand continues to move against me. My body is still arching and moving on its own. We are back to that primal feeling I had felt before and I know I can't take one more second without him taking me and claiming me.

"Eric, please. I want you now." I beg and moan at the same time.

"I will baby. I just want to see you come undone for me." He lifts up to stare into my eyes as he continues to move over and into me with his hands and fingers. I can feel something building in me. I grip him tighter and feel the lava in pooling where his touch joins with me.

My moans become louder and I feel my body tensing more on its own. "Open your eyes for me Zoe. I want to see your eyes when you let go baby."

My eyes snap open and to his. His are as dark as the passion consuming us. "Eric, it feels so…" and then my fingers dig into him further as I shatter, my body shaking as I do so.

He claims my mouth again roughly and tugs my pants down, then pulls my boots off tossing both aside. He stands up and kicks his boots off and unbuttons his own pants then lets them drop. I finally get to see see the flame tattoo goes all the way down his hip onto his thigh. He reaches into a pocket of his pants and comes back to me but sits back on his knees again looking at me.

He closes his eyes for a second and then pulls me up to him. I frown thinking he is stopping. "Are you wanting to stop?" I ask in a tremulous voice and his eyes go to mine.

"Not unless you want me too. I am just trying to not make this rough for you baby. I don't want it to be like that for you the first time." He takes my face in between his hands and kisses me softly at first but I take his bottom lip in mine and gently suck on it and moan at the feel of it.

He moans into my mouth and deepens the kiss then reaches behind to unhook my bra, letting it fall from my shoulders. He pulls back to watch as the material comes away and I am bare before him.

His nostrils flare as he leans me back to lay down back on the bed and starts to kiss his way from neck to my now braless chest. He is gentle as he teases me and kisses then takes each one through his explorations. Soon he is kissing his way down to my abdomen and carefully peels my new black lace underwear off of me. He spends time kissing any inch he can get too. It is driving me mad with desire in a way I never knew possible or that I was capable of.

"Now you Eric. I want to see you." I say in a voice deepened by passion and wanting.

He smirks at me as he raises up and moves to the side of the bed again. He lowers his boxer briefs and frees himself. I feel my breath escape me again and my chest heave more as I take in the entire site of him bare in front of me .

"You're beautiful Eric." I sigh/say. He blushes a bit but looks pleased.

He moves towards me lying on my bed. "You have no idea how beautiful to me you are Zoe. From the moment I saw you. I knew something deep inside of me knew and wanted you." He whispers as he moved to my side again and pressed close against me.

"I think it was always going to be you Eric. You or no one." I whisper back to him. He smiles at me and we start to kiss passionately again.

My hand explores him like his did me and like I had earlier when I had acted on instinct I did that again. My hand moved against him cupping his size and moaning at the feel and heat of him, but also because his own hand had moved to my heat again.

We laid there mutually exploring each other again until he pulled my hand away and moved my legs further apart then moved between them. I heard the package of his protection being opened and brief movements from him but he never broke the kiss once. Until he was poised to enter me and then he slowed the kiss.

"I don't want to hurt you baby so I am going to go slow. Ok?" He whispered just above my lips his eyes narrowed with passion and worry. I could only nod and pull him back for a kiss again. He used his fingers to brush against the spot of my core that seemed to be the most sensitive as he pressed into me. He came upon my resistance and I could feel his strain and hesitancy. So I took matters into my own hands and raised my hips sheathing him the rest of the way and breaking through that resistance.

I gasped against his mouth and cried out slightly. My arms shaking in shock and holding on to him.

"Zoe." He pulled back and murmured as if he was in pain for hurting me.

"Eric, don't stop please. It doesn't hurt. I want all of you now, please" I whisper hoarsely.

The pain had been very brief. Now all I felt was more passion and longing. He crushed my lips into a kiss again and pulled my legs to wrap around him. He started to move into me more fully.

My arms went around to his back and I moaned as I was fulfilled in a way I could never have guessed I had been empty before. It was as consuming as I had thought. It was an all-consuming and beautiful burning that radiated from where we were joined to the rest of my body.

Everything about my primal side was crying out in joy and took over for the lack of my knowledge. It showed me to move here and like this. It whispered the words that I did not know needed to be spoken or the moans and growls that I was capable of.

At some point we both knew we needed to see into each other's eyes, and I felt that tightening of my body I had felt earlier but even more intense. I felt his name bubble on my lips and I cried it out as my body convulsed around him. He gave one final push inside of me and cried my name too.

Even after the waves of pleasure subsided we looked into each other's eyes. I could see wonder, desire, deep caring and a recognizing of me. Like something was unlocked in him. Not memories specifically. Just that instinct that someone has when they know they are with the person they have loved. I don't know what he saw in mine but he leaned forward and pressed kisses to each of my eyes softly before we untangled and he lay beside me for a moment.

He kissed my lips and leaned back. "I'll be right back. I just have to go to your bathroom, ok?"

I nodded and he looked at me searchingly one more time and then moved to the attached bathroom I have. I moved under the covers when I felt the withdrawal of his warmth against my nakedness. I took in the smell of my very own and much loved teal comforter that Eric would never remember buying for me for the last birthday we celebrated together. I felt rather than saw him slide in between the covers with me and pull me to his side. I am not sure how long he had been gone but it wasn't long.

I snuggled into him and sighed at the feel of his warmth beside me again "We have to go soon don't we?" I mumbled sleepily.

His fingers began grazing up and down my arm. "No. I messaged Logan and told him we would be staying. They wanted to stay anyways. I think Milla wants to move here. Anyways they said they went to a room on the opposite wing that was set up but hadn't been used. They claim that as theirs now." He chuckled.

"I wouldn't mind them moving here if she really wants too. Be nice to have people again." I mumble and yawn.

"Then maybe we will after initiation." He whispered so low I almost didn't hear him and my breath caught.

"I'm not trying to…" He interrupted me by kissing me.

"I knew you weren't just something casual when I kissed you this morning Zoe. Maybe I knew it before I ever sat with you at lunch yesterday. But I know you are not trying to make demands of me. We will just see how this goes and go from there. I know this isn't a onetime thing." His brow is furrowed as he looks into my eyes. "I felt something there at the end. Like I knew..." he cleared his throat "I don't know what it was but it was almost like a memory just really unclear. Does that make sense?"

"I thought I saw something in your eyes. I just didn't know what exactly." I whispered and he smiled.

"I am still an asshole Zoe. I am still going to be demanding, probably controlling and borderline homicidal at times. I can't change who I am but I can try to tone it down." He shrugged.

"Have you not heard half the shit that comes out of my mouth? Eric, I would never want you to change and hope to hell you wouldn't try to change me. And you may feel like you want to kill sometimes. Eric, I..." my voice breaks.

"The rave?" He tilted his head to look at me and I nodded. "Do you want to talk about it now?"

I let out a breath I didn't know I had been holding and nod. "I had gone to the area where they had rest stations set up. Amity is always good about that. Edward and Taylor were with me but Mayra couldn't make it. I am thankful for that. She didn't have to see it all happen. Further back there were portable restrooms set up so that it wouldn't be unpleasant I guess. But no one thought to put any guards there or lights. I had heard noises. A faint scream and then it end abruptly. I ran as fast as I could to get to her. She apparently had her neck broken and I never had a chance of helping her. Eric, she couldn't have been more than fourteen. And she was just gone because two sick fucks wanted her. They saw me and started after me to get the same thing she fought against. The first guy I took out pretty fast but the other one was a brute of a guy. He picked me up and threw me. I landed hard right next to her body."

My body started to tremble in rage as I saw her ravaged and broken body. Then the same thing that had happened earlier happened again except Eric had sat up and was looking in my eyes with me sitting in his lap. "It's ok Zoe. You don't have to fight them. You already took care of them. Do you see me now?"

I blinked and nodded. He frowned and shook his head. "Before today, had we done something similar to this?"

I nodded, breathing shakily. "Amar was away and we were here. I was angry about Jeanine and I lost it when I found out…when I found out she had killed my adoptive mother. I went into a rage and you had to hold me then talk me down. You said Amar had shown you how to come out of yours before."

He smiled sadly at me. "Tell me what you were seeing when your body went into fight mode."

"Her. I could smell her blood and their…foul smelling bodily fluids, all over again. I could see her broken spine from her twisted body. I was feeling the rage I had felt then. I snapped Eric. The first guy, I just knocked him out and he stayed down. But when that all hit me I snapped. I saw the brute coming at me and something took over. I reached for the only weapon I could find. Her stiletto had come off and I grabbed it. He came at me laughing. I launched into a spin kick and knocked him to the ground and he was out I hit that hard but I didn't stop." I swallowed and closed my eyes, seeing it all again.

"I shoved the spiked heel of the dead girl into his eye so far back it killed him instantly. Edward was there and had been trying to get me to stop but I couldn't do it. When the other guy got up I might have been able to stop if he hadn't then gone after Edward. Once I saw him do that." I closed my eyes and sighed. "Like I said to Four, I am not a nice person and I have killed before. What I didn't say was that I didn't just kill Eric. I destroyed them in the most violent way I could. I can't explain what I did to the other guy because it was gruesome and I don't know where the fuck it came from."

"I know what happened to the other guy. I read the report. I know you may want me to say that those are horrible things that you did but I can't and won't. I am fucking glad you did Zoe. Not just because you would have been next but because they honestly deserved it. Do you know they could very well have gotten off because they were Amity? The Amity have this belief that their own would never commit such horrendous crimes."

I nod and let out a shaky breath. "Taylor stayed with me here for a week and talked me through it. She told me much the same thing. Even the Dauntless guards that we had to report everything to wouldn't even begin to hear that I should be charged with anything. Some Amity there demanded it but Johanna….Johanna isn't all Amity. She came to me and led me to her office and just sat there with me for hours, holding my hand and waiting for the rage to subside. Because I was still raging Eric. It was like fire in my veins. Had I come back I think I would have gone straight after Jeanine. I think she knew that and it makes sense since she knew Amar. We visited her often before. When the rage finally cleared she said. 'I strive for peace. But sometimes peace must be denied to those who know none in their soul'."

I looked into Eric's eyes for the first time since I started speaking again. He looked surprised and even had new found respect for the Amity leader and I smiled.

"She knows about Amar and Jeanine. She was one of the few leaders outside of Dauntless he trusted with that knowledge. I think he asked her to get me out of here if anything went wrong. She also thought that maybe I couldn't control it because it was so soon after Amar had passed. It was also the first rave I had been to without you. I couldn't bring myself to go to the raves out there without you for a while afterwards." I grinned at his frown.

I shrugged and smirked a little. "When you found out I was going you got so pissed at me. So I couldn't go if you didn't go with me. I wanted to dance and you didn't want me to be alone. The reason I was so pleased about lunch earlier, I just wanted to be able to dance with you again." I smiled a little shyly.

He smirked at me, shaking his head. "You could have just told me that."

I laughed and elbowed him playfully. "Would not have been as fun would it? I had to make you think you were getting something for me being able to smart mouth you a little bit."

He shook his head with a smile then turned serious. "You're wrong by the way. I have had to kill before. I went out on factionless patrols and had to do sweeps of areas. The few times we were attacked I felt something similar. Logan got hurt in one of the sweeps by a coward as he stabbed him in the side. I had a gun. I had other weapons. I used my hands and fists. You aren't a monster Zoe. We are just built different. We are protectors and warriors. That part of us turns on when someone or something we love is threatened. Did it make you feel better to talk about it?"

I nodded with a smile because it did. "I could never talk about it with Edward after I saw the look of horror on his face. Taylor didn't see it thankfully, just me. Johanna helped me burn those clothes. I wasn't sure why she did that though. Maybe so that I could see it burning away, as if it burned away the guilt. I never really felt guilty about what I did. Just at the girl's death and then my best friend seeing me lose it like that. His face was what haunted me, seeing his horror at what I could do."

He nodded and then I could see him debating something "Want to go do that jump?"

I felt a wide grin come over me. "Aren't Logan and Milla sleeping?"

He snorted, shaking his head. "I doubt they are sleeping. You gave her a full bottle of tequila and a new bed to break in. But I meant you and me. Do you want to go jump?"

I winked and laughed. "Does the sun set in the west?" I asked cheekily.

He laughed then we both jumped up to scramble and put clothes on. A short time later we were heading to the equipment area in the entry room. I stopped by the bikes and looked at him and then them. He got that wicked grin we both share.

"We each get one?" He simply asked and I nodded. He shook his head and smiled.

"I can't not tell Logan now, you know this, he will skin us." He quirks an eyebrow at me and I shrug.

He snorts and shakes his head. "Go grab the gear. I will try and interrupt their tryst and not poke a bear while I am at it. I am guessing they get the four wheeler?"

"Unless they want to take the train they will." I smirk. He laughs and heads off to the room as I head into the equipment room.

I grab a black tactical bag and put in the bungee cords, fasteners, flares, a few flashlights. I stand back to look at the weapons rack and feel Eric come up behind me.

"Well shit." He mumbles as he takes it all in.

I snort with a smug smile. "You still haven't seen the firing range. This is nothing. I was thinking of taking something non-lethal in case we need it. I think we are all armed with a gun and I know I saw Milla with a few knives…."

"What do you have?" He said looking over my stock of darts and roamed over the plastic cases. Logan walked in and stood in the doorway.

"I have a few cases of paralytic darts. They work pretty well for disabling without killing. Lasts for about 10 minutes." I reached up for an old style of a sawed of shotgun, but had to pull out the stool. Eric snorted and reached up for it and raised an eyebrow.

"Amity gave me an idea one time with their snorting of peace serum at times." I pulled out a few ammo boxes of shotgun shells and put them on the work table

"I modified the ammo casings on these and instead of buckshot or lead, they have pellets of peace and calming serum mixed in with laughing gas. They disintegrate on impact and take effect immediately. It took me some hours in the labs to get it all synthesized but my tests were pretty conclusive. It is a great crowd control tool too. Non-lethal and they are happy about it."

Logan and Milla laugh their asses off. Eric scratches his chin laughing. "We can play with the happy juice gun some other time." He locked eyes with Logan and I saw a silent conversation going on making me groan.

"Please no more attention. Just take it and tell them you made it." I begged abut Logan smirked, shaking his head.

Eric got a wicked grin. "Can't lie to Aiden he would pick that shit up in a second. Besides it won't be that bad. We won't take the happy juice gun just yet. Maybe just the paralytic darts and the.." he picks up a case and reads the label and his mouth drops open then his eyes snap over to me.

"Are you shitting me right now Zoe? How the fuck did you even come up with this or get the formula for it?" He yelled.

I frowned and looked at it then shrugged ."Dark places Eric. I wanted to see what her worst fucking fears were."

Logan frowns and comes up to take it away. He looks at it and then looks at me, a cross between a frown and wonder on his face. "How did you get it Zoe? Erudite won't even tell us it because it makes us need them for the fear sims."

I look back at Eric and raise my eyebrow at him. He just sighs and gives a small nod. "I have access. We got distracted earlier were going to show it to you. I can bring my system with me and set it up there at the compound. It is riskier though,because I don't know what kind of remote access monitoring they have set up in dauntless to monitor your information patterns or access."

Eric nods thinking, almost bouncing on his heels in thought. "We'll bring it and before we access it from there I will get you together with Logan and Four and comb over it. Let's just go on this jump and I want to ride one of the bikes dammit."

We all grin as Logan throws in the Paralytic darts and two dart guns into the tactical bag. He looks over everything and nods. "Flares and flashlights. Really good thinking Zoe. Now we need the most important part." He and I both grin.

"Whiskey!" We say at the same time and laugh.

Milla had already headed to the kitchen and got it. She stopped and looked at me, her head tilted. "Hey, aren't we jumping over and into the water?"

I smirked at her. "Figured that part out huh? Hope you don't mind skinny dipping." I wink at her and she smiles, letting out a giggle.

Eric groaned and looks at her with a scowl. "You keep your hands off. Got it! I'll give a pass to look but no groping or trying to make out with her. I am already worried about that shit happening at the club with that Lynn chick and even Mar has been eyeing her lately."

I blush and shake my head. "Nu uh. They were just trying to make me feel better about the dress I got. They didn't mean any of that." I scoff and go to the worktable by the bikes and grab the keys.

"She really has no idea, does she?" Milla asks softly.

"Apparently not." Eric mumbles and I turn to see him frowning.

"Are we ready? Sure you can handle one of these?" I smirk at him and his eyes go dangerous.

"Are you challenging me?" He walked towards me and I shrugged.

"Only if you are…" I smirk at him "...Dauntless enough to handle the challenge."

He smirks and grabs the keys for one of the bikes and heads over to it. I toss Logan the keys to the four wheeler and he straps the tactical bag to the back of it securing it down.

I go to my own bike and make sure my pistol is secured. "Really need to sew a damn holster pocket into my jacket lining like my old ones have."

Eric chuckles and quirks an eyebrow at me. "Well you are here. You could just go get one for the night. Hell take it back with you. It's not like we can't say you bought it there. Get one for Milla too since she doesn't have one either."

I shrug and nod to Milla but then add turn back to Eric. "Those double doors on the opposite side Eric, are what lead up to the lift for the vehicles. It's how I get out if I don't want to scale the other way in. The panel is marked. Put your hand on it. It still has you programmed in." I smirk at him and his choice of passcode. "Your code for you biosignature was apparently the barrel length, OA length, and weight of the Armalite AR-50A1." I grinned and led Milla way to my room.

She looks at me and smiles softly. "Logan was worried about you. He is protective of you. He doesn't think Eric will hurt you but I guess he already sees you as a sister because of Amar."

I smile at her, they both were already growing on me quickly too. "He was worried about me because I am all innocent and pure…or was." I grin at her and she smirks then laughs as we get into my room. I avoid looking at the bed and go to the closet.

"Basically. Eric can be domineering. Logan could tell you already had feelings for him. He just didn't know how or why. I guess now we know why." She shrugged and looked at the jackets with me. "It explains why he fell for you so quickly and I am glad for it. You are good for each other I think. I already like you enough to officially adopt you." She smiles as she pulls on a maroon jacket and moves her gun to the built in holster and smiles. "This is awesome!"

I laugh and pull on my favorite teal one then put my gun in it. "Yeah, I miss this jacket. And I am so taking it with me." She grabs my arm and leads me out back to join the guys.

"Take whatever you want. If Eric won't keep it for you at his place you can keep it at ours. Although I am seriously considering moving here Zoe. I was not joking about that."

I smile over at her and shake my head. "I wouldn't mind. I liked having people here. I kind of went stir crazy on my own. Did you guys find the gun range and gym yet?" I asked as we finally reach the guys.

"You have your own gun range and gym?" Her mouth drops open.

"Dad wanted me trained and I couldn't go to Dauntless. It also gave me something to do on my own when he was gone." I shrugged.

I pushed my bike on to the lift and Eric engaged it. He smiled at me as he put his hand on the pad and it started to move up. I pulled up the small screen that I had set up for the cameras as we rose up and looked around to see if there was anyone around.

"It's clear so we shouldn't have to go up armed. But if you want to you can. Eric, on the left side of the bike is a cradle for a pistol on yours. Logan, I welded yours to go in between the handle bars. I hadn't gotten to this one yet." I mutter while changing the views on the camera. Eric comes over to look at it.

"How far does the range go up on that?" He frowns looking at it.

"I have it attached to the Ferris wheel. I set the zoom and angle to however I want to remotely. I really only have it set to look for about a mile in each direction of the lift." I change the view to the vantage from the Ferris Wheel and swivel it around and let him get a look at it.

"360 degree rotational view is pretty nice." He starts playing with the screen and takes it from me. I shake my head and straddle my bike then laugh softly at him and he smirks.

"I can still and will go caveman on you tomorrow if you keep that up Zoe." I can see him putting the view back to watching our exit point. Then he goes to his bike as well and tucks the screen in his inner jacket pocket. "You put an inside holster in here for your Dad too?" He grinned happily and I nodded.

"He saw mine and did the only pout I had ever seen that man do before. I had it sewn in within an hour after he gave me that look. He said it was payback because I apparently am the master of the pout and he could never deny me anything. I did it to all his other jackets here too but he pretty much lived in that one." I gave a lopsided grin at the memory.

Logan gasped then smiled at me. "When you smiled like that just then, I saw Amar in you clearly for the first time."

I nodded and smiled. "I haven't smiled like that in a while either." I could hear us coming to the surface and I started the engine. "Eric you close the lift with the screen and your hand. Just press on the lock icon and it will bring it up. No code needed after." He nodded and when we broke the surface I slowly rolled forward off the lift. Logan next and then Eric who closed it and then I got my bearings and turned on the headlight.

"It is going to be bumpy guys. We are going off road. Sadly that is smoother than the actual roads." Then I revved the engine a bit and took off with Eric and Logan flanking me.

I loved the feel of the wind going through my hair again. The jostling of the terrain as we went over it to the bridge was exciting as always. It wasn't all that far off and we wouldn't run into any patrols. Before I knew it we were coming across the bridge. I cut the light off when we got to the middle. I cut the engine and pushed it the rest of the way to the point we would be setting up. I put the kickstand on and looked up as Eric pushed his even with me. He was grinning to match my own.

"Never fucking taking the train again." He smiled his eyes shining with the rush I always felt on the bike. I shook my head as I laughed.

"Ah but the train is fun too. You've never ridden on top of it have you." I wink and he shakes his head.

"No. And you won't be again when I am around either. I can only take so much daring from you Zoe. Not like that time you stood at the edge of the Hancock building. I almost had a heart attack right there." He said and turned to watch Logan and Milla ride up.

I had to turn away though and was frowning, my heart a little in my throat. He should not have remembered that at all. That was well before he was dosed with memory serum. I would need to research into the serum again. It wasn't supposed to be able to erase specific memories anyways so maybe it didn't. Maybe it just blocked it. I didn't want to get my hopes up or worry him though. My mind started going through everything that could go wrong or be happening.

"Zoe!" Eric called and pulled my arm. "Hey you ok? I was calling you."

I smiled and nodded. "I was just thinking about tomorrow to be honest. I am pretty excited about that. But let's get set up."

I walked as calmly as I could to the four wheeler and Logan and Eric helped me pull out everything. We set up the flares along the bridge to give us light. I coiled the cords properly and showed them how and where to fasten the cords to the bridge.

"You and Milla go first. When you want to release you can reach up and unfasten it. It will drop you into the water. There is a wooden platform not far from where you will hit water." I pointed it out to them and they nodded. "When you are done, we will get ourselves set up. But if you could head back up here and just make sure it is secure still. I can swim to the shore so I don't need the platform to get across to it." They nod and begin to strip. We all take big swigs of the whiskey. I grin as Milla does a swan dive off the bridge and laughs the whole way.

Eric chuckles when Logan does a less graceful jump. Then he looks at me and pulls me to him and kisses me senseless. He pulls back smirking at me.

"I'm glad I finally got to do that Z." He kissed my forehead. My breath catches and I pull back. Is he really remembering?

"Eric, why did you call me Z?" I say frowning.

"Don't I always call you that?" He frowned too.

"Not in a very long time Eric." I shake my head, my mind and stomach are in turmoil.

He just stood there looking at me for a while. "I'm remembering stuff aren't I? It's why you were off in your own little world earlier."

I nodded letting out a shaky breath. "I don't know how or why. I researched it for a year after she dosed you." I closed my eyes and took a breath and opened them again. I pulled him in for a kiss and he kissed me passionately. "Let's not worry about that right now. Let's jump ok?"

He nods, then we smile as we start to take off our clothes. I stand in just my bra and panties before I take another swig of whiskey and fasten the cord to me and check Eric's cord. "Ready for this?" I grin at him and he smirks.

"What was that you said? Born ready, let's do this" He smiles at me with a wink.

We both jump forward. I copy Milla's swan dive off laughing. On the second snap up, I hit the release and do a few flips then straighten out to do a dive into the water and kick my way up.

I break surface, gasping and laughing. "Holy donkey balls that is fucking cold!" I yell and I hear Eric chuckle as he swims up to me.

"Yeah it is pretty fucking cold. Need more whiskey and soon." He pulls me to him and he wraps my legs around him as he treads water for us. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him deeply before we break apart and press our foreheads together.

I shiver and as much as I would love to stay wrapped around him like this I am cold. "Alright. Let's go get more whiskey"

He chuckles as we break apart and have a bit of a swimming competition to the shore. I go under the water and swim faster in an almost mermaid fashion before I come back up and do the rest on the surface to hear Eric curse a bit just behind me.

We get to the part where we can walk the rest of the way and I stumble a little with my footing. He catches me and picks me up then carries me onto the bridge and then puts me down smiling.

"That was pretty fun. We need to do that a lot more. Maybe not in such cold weather though." He says rubbing the water from his hair. I smile at how his hair is already starting to curl slightly. He playfully bumps my shoulder "You leave my curly hair alone. I may just shave it again."

"No!" I shout. He looks over at me and winks.

We look and Logan is holding the bottle of whiskey in one hand and the flare in the other while Milla is jumping up and down.

Eric and I look at each other and smile and then instantly break into a full out run to get there first. He beats me by a mere second and smirks at me as he takes the bottle and takes a swig.

Milla runs up to me and grabs me in a hug. "That was AMAZING Zoe! We have to go again NOW!"

I laugh and hug her back. "How about another night? I still have to get some sleep so I can see the shit I blow up tomorrow." She laughs and kisses my cheek.

"Fair enough. Then I am getting my cold ass back in some clothes." Eric passes me the bottle of whiskey. I take a swig and cap it then put it back in the bag. Logan had already pulled up the cords and grabbed the fasteners so we only needed to secure the bag and get dressed.

The ride back was much the same except for about a mile out I pulled up and Eric checked the area and nodded that it was clear. He went ahead and opened the lift. I took off to make sure it stayed secure. We got back in and as soon as the bikes were secured I took Logan and Milla to the control panel room and entered them into the system.

I shrugged at their look of wonder of being allowed access. "If you need a place to come to or anything happens we know this is secure. And if you just want to get away you can come here now. Decorate your room or the walls how you will." I say before Eric drags me off to my room.

"I am still cold as hell" I growl and he chuckles.

"Want to take a hot shower?" He asks smiling at me.

I had already taken the gun out and put it on my normal side of the beds table and took of my coat and pulled off my shoes. "Yes, please gods yes. I would say more whiskey but I think you would go all Leader Eric on me and shut that shit down."

He winked at me. "You would be right." I started to strip and pulled out new underclothes but then remembered I was in my own room and shook my head.

He laughed and followed me into the bathroom. It wasn't a fancy bathroom by any means but Amar had taken some time to remodel it for me. He had found the connection to the water and sewer systems then got it set back up so we didn't have to refill the water tanks and burn the waste in the automatic incinerator.

He had made the shower a big glassed in thing tiled in my teal and grey with the stone floor the same. He painted one entire wall in silver and put quotes from "Through the Looking Glass" and "Peter Pan" in a flowing script along the room in a light teal. I never changed it and never would. I loved all the work he put into making this place our home.

Eric made sure to show me how much fun a shower could be. We spent longer in there than I would have thought possible. When we were lying in bed finally he pulled me to him again and wrapped me up in his arms and made himself my own personal heater.

"I remember something else Zoe. I remember coming in here at night and holding you during your nightmares about her. Sometimes I would lay in my bed next door and hope you had one." He mumbled as he buried his head in my hair.

I felt tears threaten to fall at that. "I would have let you sleep here every night. I just didn't want to seem weak and I thought you saw me as a sister Eric."

"I know. I wasn't exactly eloquent about my feelings then or even now. Amar knew though I think. I have a vague memory of him telling me that I should tell you before I transferred. I guess that never happened, me telling you?" He asked quietly.

"No that never happened." I sighed and he nodded.

"We have each other again now." He whispered and I nodded.

We feel asleep with him holding me tightly. For the first time in a very long time I slept without waking up in a panic or from a nightmare.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: (Edited for errors and grammar) Here is the next chapter and probably going to be the last update for a few days on this story. I need to get caught up on 'Catching Silver' and 'Hardlines'. I really hope you enjoy this chapter. Zoe is sure going to enjoy the hell out of blowing shit up…maybe… and I can only live vicariously through her on that aspect.**

 **Disclaimer: Veronica Roth still owns it all; I snuck in my own plot and shadows to play with though.**

 **Chapter 7**

If I thought I had been bleary yesterday, it was nothing to right now. My alarm on my watch went off at 4:30 am and I groaned as I tried to roll over. I found I was trapped in a steel cage of human arms.

"You have to be shitting me Zoe." Eric groaned. "What time is it? It can't be 6 yet." He muttered sleepily.

"I can't read the alarm but I set it for enough time for me to get coffee and work out." I said and yawned. He growled something about showing me a workout for waking his ass up early just before he pulled me to him.

As wake ups go that was the best fucking one I had ever had to date. It was much better than my usual stumbling to grab coffee. Apparently sex can get the blood pumping and heart racing just as well.

I still stumbled to get coffee going once Eric finally let me go after smirking at me for a bit and telling me to put clothes on as I stumbled from the shower.

The shower that he had dragged me into and then kept me in for another "workout". I didn't have my workout clothes but I did have some clothes that Amar had bought and brought to me from Dauntless. I dragged on a pair of cargo like pants that were always tighter than I cared for but loved the pockets on. I paired that with the v-neck black t-shirt I had and then grabbed the boots I had worn here. I was looking through my jackets and saw that I did have my short sleeved black and grey leather jacket. That one did have the pocket sewn in.

Eric walked behind me as I pulled the jacket out and wrapped his arms around me. I smiled and leaned back into him. "You're still naked Eric."

"And this is a problem, why?" I heard the smirk in his voice and chuckled.

"Because I need coffee and we need food before we have to pack up everything we are taking and head out. Unless you don't want to fire that fifty cal just as much as I do. And don't even try and say you weren't going to join in, because I know you too well to know you wouldn't let Logan and I have all the fun." I turned to face him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

He sat thinking and debating "We have time."

I laughed, turning a little red. "You are a terrible influence Coulter. But even I have to disagree at the moment. Do I seriously have to be the voice of reason? Where is Leader Eric right now?"

He smirked at me, letting his hand go to cup my ass. "He is looking at very sexy woman. One he is not ready to let walk out that door without at least kissing her senseless so she remembers who she belongs to."

I smiled and let him pull me too him so he could assert his caveman dominance. Even after being intimate I still swayed when we were done and pulled back. He chuckled and kept me steady.

I glared at him and then looked at his nakedness. I had to close my eyes before I did what he had just been trying to get me to do. "Do you want me to get something from Dad's room to wear?" I ask softly.

He cups my cheek and I open my eyes to look at him as he smiles sadly. "How about you go start that coffee and I will go in and see if there is anything I can wear." I nod and he kisses me deeply before he pulls back and cups my cheek again. "I won't touch anything else until we come back here sometime this week and look through everything. I might go to my room and check things out there."

I smile and nod. "Ok. I will see what I can scrounge up for breakfast. I know we had a bunch of stuff in the deep freezer and cold storage."

"Sounds good. I will try and hurry to help. We might have to drag Logan out of bed though." He smiled and I kissed him again, then grabbed my jacket and gun as I walked out of the room. I looked down the hall at the two rooms past mine and stopped briefly but then turned to the kitchen and put my jacket and gun down.

I opened the cabinet with the coffee and got it going in the big coffee maker Amar had bought for us since we had all been big coffee addicts.

I had to walk to the Equipment room area but turned down a narrower hallway and went into the big food storage area we had. I went to the cold area first and saw that there was a bit of the preserved bacon left and while there were not fresh eggs there were frozen egg omelets that could be put in the convection/microwave oven we had. I grabbed a stack of them in case someone wanted more than one. I frowned and grabbed the last bit of fruit we had and juggled all of that as I walked towards the kitchen.

"Baby, why didn't you wait?" Eric frowned and took things from me as I tried to set them down without dropping everything.

"It was fine," I stopped as I looked at him and smiled. He was wearing my dad's clothes and I should be sad, but it was oddly satisfying to see him in them. The way they fit him was like they were made for him too.

He turned to me and pulled me to him and frowned. "You ok with this? Does it upset you, me wearing them?"

I shook my head and kissed him. "No, maybe I should be sad but I'm not. I like you in them, they look like they were made for you." I shrug and he smiles.

He sighs with a frown. "It was hard going in there. I had flashes of conversations with him. Some of them pretty fucking embarrassing." He blushed. "It was harder going into my old room. Had you seen what I painted there?" He frowned at me.

I shrugged "I hadn't gone into your room for about a year before you left. Dad said that it was a sacred man space and that I should give you your privacy for man things. So I stayed away; you just always went to my room or we would hang out in the other areas. After you left us I couldn't bring myself to go in there. Dad went in there once just to straighten up but he walked out soon after and, he was pretty broken up. Why?"

He looked like he was debating something then took my hand and led me to the room "You said you thought I saw you as a sister. I didn't think that was possible and I was right."

He pushed the door open and led me in, at first I didn't see anything until he led me to his bed and had me lay down with him on it and pointed up. On the ceiling was a mural of us. Eric and I through the years he had known us. Right above his bed was the Eric and I from just before he forgot about me. In it were scenes of him holding me some in innocent embrace. Some it looked as if we were moments from kissing.

My breath hitched in my chest when I saw the words and Eric took my hand in his "Waiting is a sign of true love and patience. Anyone can say I love you, but not everyone can wait and prove it's true. I will wait for you Zoe." Eric whispered and I felt a tear fall and anger course through me.

He nodded and said in a hard voice "She will pay for it, I promise you that Zoe. But she won't take this away from us again; never again."

I turned to look at him and we just looked into each other's eyes. I am not a fountain of openness but I did let him see what I had always felt just as he let me see what he felt now. I didn't need the words right now, maybe never. He smiled at me and leaned in to kiss me gently and we pulled back when we heard our names being called.

I smiled "They have great timing don't they."

He rolled his eyes and laughed "Just fucking perfect timing. They probably smelled the coffee, we should get up anyway."

I nodded and we got up but before we left he had grabbed a few things I didn't catch and tucked them into his inner pocket of the jacket he had worn since last night. I think it would become his new everyday jacket too. "What was that?" I asked as we walked to the kitchen.

"Pictures and drawings of you and us I had taken or done." He shrugged and I smiled at that.

We walked into the kitchen and Milla sat wrapped in one of our large towels and Eric shook his head.

I got what Milla needed and led her to my room. I made the bed while she looked through the closet. She happened to find a black sundress type of thing I had but had never worn and smiled at it.

"Mind if I wear this?" She smiled at me.

"Keep it, I never wore it before and I don't know that I would now. To girly, the only reason I bought those dresses that I tried on was because the girls kept going on about how 'fuckable' they made me and I just didn't know how to tell hurricane Lauren no." I laughed and she grinned in a bit of an overly innocent way that let me know it was not altogether innocent.

"Are you going to wear one of them tonight?" She asked as she went to my bathroom to change and use the little bit of makeup I had there.

I was stripping my bed down and threw the sheets into the hamper and made a mental note to wash the sheets and make the bed later. "I am not sure, maybe. I was thinking of wearing these leather pants I got and a black halter type shirt I saw at the store. I want to be able to dance and I not sure what will happen in one of those dresses."

She came out and had her hair braided like I did, off to the side and smiled at me. "I thought you said you didn't have piercings? I found lots of earrings in there."

"Oh I have my ears pierced normally; I just want to add some small gauges too. In fact, I think I will put in the earrings he gave me and the bracelet my dad gave me. Thanks for reminding me." I smile and head into the bathroom and root around until I find the Teal Swarovski Crystal Stud earrings Eric had bought me and the silver and teal twisted metal bracelet my dad had bought me. They had both went in and decided what the other should get so that my birthday gifts matched that year.

As I was putting in my earrings I smiled at Milla who was looking through things. "You can wear anything you see, I trust you. I have some necklaces I think too. My dad was always trying to get me things he thought young girls should want. He stopped after he realized I would rather have new guns and weapons or something to paint or draw with."

She laughed "I wasn't the usual Amity either, and my parents didn't know how to handle it or me. So I get that, I really didn't embrace being me or a woman until I became Dauntless. It is funny the things it takes for you to become who you always were or were meant to be."

I nodded "Yeah it is kind of crazy, but that is our society for you. Ready for some coffee, and maybe some ok frozen eggs?"

I laughed at her face "I found some fruit for you."

She smiled and dragged me out along with her into the kitchen. Eric had a big cup of coffee waiting for me and smiled at me.

I looked over and Logan already had a bowl of the fruit for Milla and I smiled at them as she leaned in and kissed him thanks.

I took a frozen omelet and grimaced and put it into the microwave and went to the counter with all of my sauces and pulled out green chili and hot sauce. "Have to mask the ick somehow." I replied to Eric's raised eyebrow and he shook his head and laughed. My omelet finished and I grabbed it out and

Eric handed me the plate with bacon as he sipped his coffee and was reading on his tablet.

I had just taken a bite when I heard him let out a hiss of breath. "Fucking hell" He growled and I quirked an eyebrow at him.

He looked over at Logan "Did it get caught on camera?"

"Yeah, it was like she said. She was trying to get into the locker and was trying to force her way in." He growled and I instantly knew something was up.

"Chris?" I asked in a hiss of my own.

Eric nodded "She was trying to get into your locker and apparently Molly caught her and threatened her. Then when Chris left to supposedly go to her punishment she never showed. Next thing we know Molly is in the infirmary. She is fine and will be released, Chris will be there for a day and Al oddly enough was brought down rather spectacularly by a well-placed kick to the junk. She couldn't actually identify that they had attacked her, but she did say that shortly before that Chris was trying to get into your locker. The attack wasn't caught on camera but her trying to break the lock was." His voice was hard.

"So they can't even be kicked because there is no proof." I breathed out and sipped my coffee and Logan and Milla were frowning at me.

"Why aren't you more upset?" Logan asked and I just shrugged and gave my one wicked smile.

"Because that would have been them getting off them too easy." I started to eat my food and smiled in real anticipation.

"You guys scare even me sometimes." Logan muttered and continued to eat and Eric and I shared smirks.

"The only part I am truly upset about is now I can't spar against her today. But maybe I can him?" I looked at Eric and he shook his head.

"Not until I spar with you to at least know you can move out of his range fast enough Zoe. I know you are good but he won't have to hit you hard to put you out. If you want to skip lunch and have Tris bring you something we can do a session. Or if we get back before lunch is called we can try then. Otherwise no, I am not putting you with him for a sparring session; maybe fights but not a spar." He says in his Leader Eric voice.

Inwardly I am pissed. I get where he is coming from but I am still pissed about it. I hear Logan chuckle and shake his head "Trying to reign in the temper?"

I shrug "I get what he is saying logically but I don't like it. I guess I will look at it like this, a spar wouldn't count for shit on points and when I hit the perv I want to hit him where it will really hurt him the worst. I want it to hit him not only physically but also in his ranking."

Eric chuckled and shook his head "So no sparring session for us?"

I quirked an eyebrow "I never said that did I Coulter. If you wanted to we could go in the sparring room we have here. I knocked you on your ass there plenty of times before."

I heard Milla cough and laugh at the same time. Logan was hiding a smile "Trying to taunt me enough so you can get your way today?" Eric crossed his arms over his chest and smirked at me.

"Nope just stating a truth" I shrugged and ate my food trying not to smile and not doing a good job.

"You know I am getting memories back and while yes you did win a few times. I don't think it could equate to knocking me on my ass. Also, I have changed too Z, you might not get as lucky as you did then."

I shrug and pop off the stool and chug my coffee "I guess we won't know until lunch then, will we."

I get the first premonition something is not going to go my way when I hear a slight chuckle and then I am thrown over Eric's shoulder and instead of the direction of the sparring room I wanted to go to we are headed to the direction of the rooms. "Wrong direction Eric!" I yell and pound on his back.

"Oh no, this is exactly where I am meaning to go. We are going to spar, just not in the way you wanted." He said coldly.

"We don't have time for that Eric." I said in frustration.

"More time than we would have had for a sparring session you wanted." He heads into his room. And slams the door with his foot then tosses me onto his bed.

"Why are we in here?" I said looking around.

"Living out a fantasy" He grinned wickedly and stripped out of his jacket and looked at me expectantly.

I crossed my arms over my chest and got my stubborn look. "Nope, not taking anything off, we don't have time. We still have to pack up stuff."

He rolled his eyes and opened his door "Yo Logan, pack up the computer and this shit we are taking from the equipment room, and have Milla grab Zoe's shit she wanted too." He slammed the door and locked it and looked back at me as he started taking off his boots. "Take it off Zoe." He demanded.

"No" I scoffed.

"Ok" He shrugged and reached into a drawer of the desk and pulled out a knife. "Take it off, or I cut it off." He said tapping the knife against his fingers.

My eyes flashed and I leaped up and started taking things off and cursing under my breath. Not for one second did I not believe he wouldn't do exactly as he said he would. Eric had never made idle threats.

When I was sufficiently undressed he pushed me back on the bed and proceeded to show me even more I didn't know about. Like how he was good with his mouth on places other than my mouth and neck. After that he had taken me more roughly and passionately than he had the previous night but I didn't mind because I was angry and so was he. It wasn't exactly like sparring but it was just as enjoyable if not more so.

We lay panting on his bed and tried to get control. He looked over at me and looked at the marks he had put on the back of my neck as well as along my abdomen and smirked in glee. I had left a few on him too. His just weren't going to be as visible as mine were.

"So that was what you fantasized about me in here?" I asked in disbelief.

He chuckled and shook his head. "I am pretty sure younger me would have gutted older me for thinking about doing those things and that rough with you. But being with you, yeah that I did in here. It inspired an interesting talk with your dad once."

I turned red "You talked about me and you?" I gasped.

"We never said your name, but I think it was implied. As was the fact that he didn't sleep far away and if it was ever something someone didn't want there were plenty of weapons around to choose from." He said motioning to his room and knives on his desk and bookshelf.

I nodded and he leaned in to kiss me "Was I too rough with you?"

I shook my head and smiled "Not at all. Was I with you?"

He scoffed and I grinned. We heard his tablet go off and I chuckled and got up and went to his bathroom to clean up. "Probably Logan saying we had plenty of time." I mutter.

He laughed "Pretty much word for word, and apparently if you aren't returned to them soon they will hunt me down. You just keep gaining adopted siblings, you know that. Before I know it I will have all of Dauntless after me if we get into an argument or something."

He follows me into the bathroom and cleans up too and then we get dressed quickly. I have to re-braid my hair and Eric looks back at the back of my neck "Good, wear it to the side, that way everyone can see."

I shake my head "Like it hasn't circulated that some initiate is doing Coulter."

"Let them say that shit to me and see how they like me then" His voice gets cold "And you don't refer to it like that either Zoe, or I will be pissed."

"I was playing Eric." I said softly and went to put my boots back on.

He sighed "I just don't want you thinking that is all it is for me."

"I don't just like you don't think the same about me." I brought him in for a kiss by pulling him forward to me by his shirt after I had stood back up. He gently kissed me and nuzzled my neck again then sighed and pulled back.

"We need to go, but Logan has everything packed up. Milla is apparently pouting we can't take the bikes back. Not that I blame her really." He grinned and grabbed my hand after I had put my jacket back on and the gun in its hidden pocket holster. We headed out to meet up with the others and Milla looked at me a bit worriedly then smiled when she saw I was ok.

"So we can't take the bikes?" She said hopefully.

"Not unless you have somewhere they could be hidden so we don't have to share with all of Dauntless. But I tell you what, I will build you your very own with some of the parts and frames I have around. Sound good?" I said looking right at Logan who half glared at me.

"And here I was calling you my sister." He muttered and winked at me.

Milla was singing she was so happy and Eric just shaking his head "How many frames do you have, because now you have to make one for Logan because he won't want the four wheeler. You can give the Four wheeler to Tris."

I thought for a moment and nodded "Sound advice, I like it. Now we better get gone if we are going to go. Is the way looking clear?" I ask trying to get the smaller tablet that has the camera view on it.

Eric holds it away from me "Yeah about that, you're not getting this back. I found the other camera settings."

Logan's eyebrows quirked "Do I even want to know?"

I sighed "Yes, you are going to want to know, but we don't have time to go through them all. We should go and we you can play with it on the train. Are we dropping Milla off and the stuff first?"

Eric and Logan nodded and we all walked to the lift and Milla looked disappointed. I laughed and nudged her "We can scale the other way when we come here next time; or whenever you can drag Logan here next."

She smiled at me "Already know me so well."

"I was thinking the same thing honestly, great minds you know." I shrug and Eric starts the lift and pulls up the camera looking around.

He sighs "They aren't near us but I do see some movement in the pier area. Looks like factionless have moved to the area. Is there a way to send …never mind found it." He muttered.

"Send the images and coordinates?" I asked softly and he nodded and smiled at me.

I frowned "That is still fairly close to us, but at least we aren't going by them on foot. How is the buildings looking that we pass on the way here. There should be internal cameras set up in that set of ruins."

I pull out my gun and check the mag one more time counting the rounds and then feel in my cargo pants for the knives I stashed there.

Eric nodded "Those are good too; just keep it out of the pocket of the jacket and in the waistband. I just called the grouping into a patrol, Logan. You might way to sanction any Intel you need or actions you want taken."

Milla was checking her gun but had no other place to put it than the pocket. "Got your knives Milla?"

She nodded and I held out my hand and she handed me two. I had her turn around and re-braided her hair to work them in her hair with the handles easily accessible and made to look like the ends of hair combs. I surveyed it and nodded. "It will work, it won't cut the hair and easy to draw, it will give you time to pull your gun if you can get those off."

I moved back around and Eric was eyeing me as was Logan "What? I had to pack something at raves after …you know. They checked clothes but not a girl's hair." I shrugged.

Eric nods "It is smart, good thinking. What made you think of it?"

"Martial arts movies, except it was modified stiletto knives made to look like chopsticks that held women's hair up." I shrugged.

The lift had made it up and we walked off and Logan took point with Milla in the middle and Eric and I bringing up the rear. Logan had the bag with everything on his bag and he also had the dart gun with the paralytic darts loaded.

We made is past the ruined buildings and heard vehicles approaching and Logan called a halt to make sure where they were headed to. The Dauntless patrol vehicle stopped and called out to Logan who went over to it.

I tensed because I could tell his body language was not happy. He motioned us over and we walked over "We are getting a lift from here. They took the group we called in but there were more in some of the attractions hiding out. We are going to have to do sweeps, Zoe I know we are supposed to take you out for long range sniper but Max has asked you to accompany us for the sweeps."

I could feel Eric stiffen "No, not happening…"

"It's done Eric. The other's signed off on it. We can take her in to get her geared and he said you could go too but she is going and we might be setting her up as an active sniping op if need be." Logan shrugged.

Milla looked pissed and he tried to reason with her but she wasn't having it. "Just because she can doesn't mean she should."

I put my hand on her arm and shook my head "Logan doesn't like it any more than you or Eric, Milla. But I know this area really fucking good. If I can help I should, it is who I am and it will happen sooner rather than later. I have been doing it on my own before now, this way is safer. Okay?"

She looked at me with hard eyes "One cut or scratch on you Zoe and I will kill you myself."

I smirked and nodded "I will even let you pick out my clothes for tonight; since you were already planning to anyways with all the sneakiness you thought you were getting away with."

She smiled at me "Deal, I even took the perfect jewelry for it."

I groaned "Give a woman an inch."

Eric put his hand on my back and led me to the rear where we were loading in. Logan put the bag in the back and we headed back to the compound and in through the gates I had never seen before. Once we got out Logan walked Milla to their place and took the bag. It was understood we would take what might be needed but otherwise it was being left at their place until we got back.

Eric led me to the control room where the leaders were and looking concerned. Max frowned when I came in, he didn't like doing this either I could tell. I smiled at him reassuringly and he looked a bit more relieved at this.

We took seats around a table and Eric got us both coffee and water. We waited for the rest of the team and I found Zeke had been pulled for it the actual op, but Four was in the planning. Logan made his way in and had a smaller bag with the items they had already proposed using as non-lethal and that I agreed to have presented now.

"Ok let's get this started." Max cleared his throat. "Last night we were told of an increase of factionless activity in what is predominately our sector. This Intel was provided by Logan who had accompanied Zoe along with Eric on some field training I had authorized. During this she was able to further provide conclusive date" He clicked on a screen and it showed the different cameras I had set up in and around my area, the old park grounds and some of the buildings there. "These are from cameras she had monitoring the area. I already advised Leadership of why these cameras were necessary for her safety prior to now. I had already set up a loose patrol with Amar to watch the vicinity anyways but she expanded on that beyond what we could have even have dreamed. She knows the area better than even our own guys do, and she is also a dead eye."

He cleared his throat, "I know Four and Logan have been very vocal since learning of her early activation about her not going. I am sure Eric is not happy either about it and I wouldn't be sending her out if I wasn't sure it was needed and that she could handle it. I will ask you Zoe, what your thoughts are on it?" He crossed his hands over his stomach and steeple them.

"I think everything you said is correct Sir, I am much more acquainted with the area and had been doing my own sweeps and clearings of my direct area on my own for months now. I am somewhat familiar with their patterns of movement; it has generally been the same groups. Also, this is who I am and what I am here for. I follow orders Sir." I shrug and I see a flicker of respect on the other Leaders faces that I had not met before. "I don't expect to get out of training or initiation but will consider it a new lesson learned." I say honestly. I can feel Eric tapping the knife he had earlier on his fingers and I knew he was still not happy with this.

Max turned to the others then back to me. "This will be a fully authorized op Zoe, so lethal force will be authorized. Will you be able to act if needed?"

My voice went soft and my eyes hard. "If I need to I will not hesitate sir. I will not stand for anyone of our own being put at risk of injury or death. Not if I have breath in my body left sir."

The others nod and Max smiles sadly but then schools his features again "You said you had something to show Aiden, Logan?"

Aiden turns to look at Logan who opens the bag he carried and took out the Paralytic darts and gun and then then modified shot gun with the modified ammo cases. Aiden frowned and reached for the dart case first.

"Zoe has come up with two methods of totally viable non-lethal methods of being able to either enable crowd control or to neutralize a single target. Those darts are paralytic darts." He looked sheepishly at me and I realized what he was about to say and couldn't help it I laughed.

"You didn't believe me about their effects did you?" I chuckled and he nodded.

"I had to test it out if we were going to present it and what better way. I couldn't move my leg for 15 minutes. Well above the ten you predicted, but you were right, a spine shot or torso should immobilize." He nodded at them and I saw Four frowning.

"Where did you get them?" Aiden asked.

"When I was still in Erudite I made the formula and synthesized it myself in the labs. As well as the contents of the next one Logan is going to show you." Logan had already told me not to mention the fear sim inducing darts to the meeting in general; we would talk to Max about that only.

Aiden nodded "This one alone bears looking at. I am guessing you want to take it as a non-lethal option on this op?"

Logan nodded "It would be a good field op to test it on, yes I believe we should and possibly this one too. Although, the only version of the gun available to fire the ammo is the one we have. Zoe was able to create a modified version of the peace serum, calming serum and laughing gas into a pellet that disperses the content on impact and acts immediately. Umm, again it had to be tested…"

I had to bite my lip and Aiden held up his hand "Could we test that one now?"

"No!" Both Logan and I yelled and then grinned at each other.

"It is an area effect..." I started and Logan nodded and finished.

"I had been in the room with someone else at the time and they weren't directly hit but the cloud still was inhaled and they too felt the effects for it. This lasted for an hour, and leaves the person with a hell of a hangover after." He rubbed the back of his neck and I had to bite on my lip harder.

Aiden and the other's chuckled "Fair enough, you may take and use both. I assume that something will be worn by the person doing the shooting?"

I shook my head "No, I was actually was able to come up with a countermeasure to the serum that can be injected to the persons that will be going in with this. I didn't think it would make sense to send someone in for a surprise crowd control but have protective gear give that element of surprise away."

Everyone looked pretty impressed with that. Logan grinned and pulled out the vials of serums I had created and Eric frowned. I guess we hadn't told him about that.

"If you had that why didn't you use this on the other person in the room?" Aiden asked.

Logan shook his head "Honestly, I doubted it would work. I had done this one first then the dart after while still on the effects of the serum."

Max let out a loud laugh at that and shook his head. "I think it is safe to say we are all looking forward to seeing how effective these are. And if they are effective we will have Zoe and Aiden work on replicating more for us. We won't go to Erudite for them, although we might have to get some equipment in some way to make it happen."

Aiden looked positively gleeful "So she would have time with me in Weapons development in addition to…"

Max cut him off "We can talk about all that later. For now, Zoe you are being activated for the field op with possible chances of needing your sniper abilities. We will load you with the bolt you performed with and if necessary we might have the fifty cal. with you, Logan and Eric. We will send in our ground groups with a few of the dart guns and another for the groupings of Factionless with the crowd control. You are aware you will need to follow all commands and orders you are given by Eric and Logan immediately. I know you worked on your own before but not anymore." He searched my face and I nodded.

"Yes Sir, that is perfectly clear and understandable. Again, I will not let your trust in me down Sir." I said firmly.

He nodded and smiled "I know you won't Zoe, if it was any other initiate I wouldn't even been contemplating this action." He looked around at the others "Does anyone else have anything to add?"

Everyone shook their heads and he nodded and stood up "I want her outfitted completely in vests and communications. You two are personally responsible for her." He looked at Eric and Logan who nodded. "Zeke will make up the fourth in your group. Four asked to be here because she is his initiate, but he will not be allowed to relay any of the activities to anyone outside of this room."

Everyone stood and the leaders went out but not before Max came up and stood next to me looking down at me "You better come back home Zoe." He said softly and then walked off.

Four came up and his jaw was clenched "I second that and I can't tell Tris or the others anything. You won't be able to either unless the leaders authorize it." He leaned and whispered "Keep an eye out for her if you see or hear her name. If you need to use my name. My real one Zoe." He pulled back and I nodded in understanding. He must really be worried if he is willing for me to do that.

Once he was gone Logan packed everything back up and our group headed down to the weapons locker and patrol gearing room. I heard whispers as soon as we entered but they were all silenced by looks from Logan and Eric as we made our way into where we would all be outfitted.

Eric started handing me gear and without having to be told where to put it all, I started to get set up. I was given a sidearm thigh holster which strapped on and set my pistol into place. Next I took the Kevlar vest with ammo pockets, slits for knives and then a small medkit. We loaded me with ammo for my pistol and the MP5 I would be issued. He handed me a few more knives then I already had and I put them into the holders and then I took a few more and braided them into my hair like I had done with Milla. Over that I put the cover Dauntless leather patrol jacket. Then I put the communicator in my ear and synced it with my watch to auto tune to the right channels that we would be monitoring.

Once that was done I was led over to the case with the MP5 and given that, then I picked out the M40 and picked up the ammo case and the bag to carry it in. I grabbed the cradle, scope and infrared scope as well. Logan packed the 50 Cal up and all the ammo for that. Just like when I had to run with it, I strapped it to my back with it going from the top right shoulder to my left hip and made sure it was tight.

Eric looked me over and his jaw was clenched. I signed him to stop and relax for now. He just shook his head and said he would relax when we were back. I rolled my eyes and Logan addressed the group. I stood next to Zeke and Eric, holding the MP5 in the relaxed position but standing at attention. He gave the details of the op and then called out two four man teams that would be working with the darts and another four man team that would be using the serum gun. He had gotten an injection gun and injected them since the serum lasted for six hours.

My group trailed the vehicles that headed out. "How far out are you having them halt the vehicles?" I asked.

Eric had the camera views pulled up on the screen we had and was looking through them. I had a sudden thought "Shit! I so fucking forgot." I leaned over and tapped a screen to bring up commands and switched to infrared in the buildings area. "Sorry Eric, I hardly ever use that view."

He just frowned at me "How…how do you even have this level of tech, Zoe?"

Logan put his hand out from the front and Eric gave it to him. I sighed "I was able to raid the stores they never even think of touching Eric. They have whole rooms of shit they produce but can't find the use for or the people that need it can't meet their price. The only ones that would need that example of tech is us, so I took the shit that they stockpile. Consider it payment for lab rat services rendered." I muttered.

"Where do they keep this stuff, in their labs in the main buildings or somewhere else?" Logan asked as he sent data to the sweeping groups ahead of time.

"No they keep it close the border of their sector and the factionless. They use the factionless as slave labor for most of the production and rotate out so no one is every working for more than a week or two at a time consistently." I said simply and he nodded.

"We are coming up on it where we are getting out. We are heading up to the bell tower up there. Are you familiar with it?" He asked.

"Yeah, I have some steel bars that are lodged into the wall of the south side I use to check on the camera there instead of using the stairs, those started to rot out a while back and got too dangerous to try and climb up. There is a rappelling line up there so we can use that to hoist gear if you are wanting to set up shop there." Eric shook his head and I sighed.

Logan nodded sounds good, We will cover from the ground and you go up, keep you MP5 strapped on but leave the rest. Once you are up you can cover as one of us comes up, Eric you go up second." Eric nodded as if to say, you bet your fucking ass I am.

Zeke pulled up a ways away so as not to alert any groupings and we kept in with me in the middle and Eric covering my side with Zeke in front and Logan in the back. Once we made it to the bell tower I strapped the MP5 to the side for ease of reach but still allowing me to move and started to climb up the steep spaced steel bars I had taken a while to get moored into place. Before I crawled over I pulled the pistol and unlocked the safety and vaulted over and crouched ready to shot and looked over. I gave the all clear whistle and stood up and put the safety back on and holstered it. Tossed the rappelling line over the side and kept a perimeter scan up until Eric came over. He looked up to where I would need to be stationed with the bolt and cursed at how bad it looked.

"You can't fucking go up there Zoe" He muttered.

"I can and will have to Eric. You can't let this shit be personal. I shored that up to a while ago it has steel beams in-between the sections that are more rotted. Do I need to have Logan come up there with me instead?" My eyes flashed at him.

"Like to see you fucking try and stop me from going up there." He muttered too watching like I was as we waited for the signal to hoist the bags.

"If you keep acting like I am Zoe and not a soldier then I will. You better shut that down Eric, I am not Zoe right now. I am an op agent." I growled out, getting pissed at him and he sighed.

"Fine, you still follow my orders though and if I am not liking how something is looking we are out of here. Got it?" He growled out too.

I nodded and then when the whistle was given I helped Eric hoist up the considerable weight of the two weapons. Once they were up, Logan vaulted over and helped to being over. As soon as he offloaded the bolt I strapped it on and climbed the next set of steel bars I had in place and got onto the platform at the top I needed to be laying on. I was already unpacking my ammo and had the gun set up when Eric got into place.

I pulled out the two scopes and put the regular on bottom and the infrared on top of that and then got to the first target area that would be the patrol would be going too. Once I was set up and had my sites in place and my ammo out I tapped on the metal in Morse code that I was ready. We got the Morse code back that they would breach in 5.

I put my eye to the scope and made sure to watch the breach site but scanned the windows too.

I tensed when I saw a flitter of movement from the roofline of the building and zoomed in and hand signed to Eric that I saw two factionless one armed for sure on the roofline.

He tapped my arm to take out the armed if looking like he was going to fire.

I slowed my breathing in and out and kept track of the movements but kept trained mainly on the known armed factionless. I saw the tension in the man's body as he realized there were Dauntless approaching and I waited for him to raise the weapon and then fired. It was a direct head shot and then I quickly loaded and centered on the second known man and saw he had a smaller gun and raised it so I took that shot too. Another head shot but lower…still was a kill.

The patrol breached the area and I kept trained on the windows and loaded another bolt and sat in ready. We got the all clear for that building and I flicked on the safety and rotated to look at the next set of sweeps to take place. These were attractions but still needed to be watched. I reloaded my bolt and readied my ammo and checked my sites and bracing.

The next set of sweeps went well and I didn't have to fire another shot. My body was still coiled with tension and I knew I would need to get in some major physical activity to release it. I had already started to process the kills I had made and I was surprised I did not feel guilty in the least. They were not supposed to be armed and we wouldn't have fired unless being attacked at all. They hadn't been hurt anywhere in this sector before now and wouldn't have either. I let them doom themselves by rising to aim and fire and then did what needed to be done.

When the all clear was given I calmly started to pack up and went to climb down. Eric stopped me and just looked at me to make sure I was ok.

I shrugged "They shouldn't have been armed and I let them hang themselves. When they started to point they became a valid threat and needed to be taken down." I was not being brave by saying this but truthful.

He nodded and his softened "Good, let's go home."

He let me go down before him but insisted on carrying the weapon. A guard had driven up our truck and stood by to make sure we were safely away before he went to his own.

When we made it back into the gate I was taken back to the gear room but this time I was given applause from those we passed. Oddly I was ok with this, because it wasn't for the sake of attention. It was their way of recognizing a rite of passage, the first kill. But also letting the person that could have saved one of their lives know they saw them as an equal. I turned back in my equipment and ammo. Put my own leather jacket back on and put the pistol back in place and then walked back out Initiate Zoe.

Eric held my hand as we walked and Zeke and Logan walked behind us. We had to make our way to the control room for the debriefing and I was glad I was given a lesson on what to expect. They cameras I had set up and caught the images of all the sweeps teams including my own two kills. I would still have to give my verbal accounting of the shots themselves.

When I walked in this time all the leaders there shook my hand and I was given a seat by Max, with Eric beside me.

Logan started "Sweeps brought in a total of twenty factionless; a combination of men, women and even a few children. The Intel that Zoe provided us beforehand of their pattern of movements and groupings was spot on. She predicted the women and children would be in the attraction areas they were and were brought in with no force necessary. We will do the customary wellness checks and make sure they have been questioned properly but then they will be taken to the Abnegation center that was set up for the influx of Women and Children on their own. We hope they stay but they haven't been doing so lately. As for the major buildings, the paralytic darts were able to immobilize three men that sought to run and one that was armed with a knife, preventing a guard from being stabbed when his group mate took the guy down with the dart. The larger building we did see some issues with. There were two armed individuals stationed on the roof. With the Intel Zoe again provided us on the bell tower we were able to get stationed there and Zoe was in position as our eyes and sniper."

He looked to me and nodded "The first individual I saw had a MP5 that was visible from the beginning. I based my information on the threat on this and relayed it to my spotter Eric. He relayed the order to only fire if they suspect looked to be about to fire. When the sweep group came within range, the suspect raised his weapon to aim and I took my shot, it was a kill shot to the head. The other suspect was unknown as far as weaponry but I reloaded quickly to access and be ready. He had a smaller caliber weapon, still an assault from the looks of it, I would say maybe an AR15, he also raised and went to aim and I took my second and only other shot of the day. That was also another kill shot to the head Sir's" I finished in a clear and firm voice.

The leaders nodded and turned back to Logan. Aiden spoke up "How did both the non-lethal work overall?"

Logan nodded, clearly pleased "Very well sir. The paralytic darts performed admirably and once the larger building was breached, the crowd control agent was automatically fired into the groupings of men that were seen via the infrared imaging we had care of the cameras Zoe had in place. Overall the op in general was a success and the new tech and weaponry was even more of a success."

Max nodded and smiled "Excellent! We thank you all for your swift response and excellent teamwork for our newest field team."

I felt Eric tense beside me but he didn't say anything and neither did anyone else. Max looked at me "Zoe it is past lunch time, but I am sure someone can get something together for you guys. If you would rather not go to training then you may have the rest of the day off, otherwise you can feel free to return."

"I believe I would like to return after I have eaten something sir. I still have much to learn and train with." I said respectfully and he nodded and looked to Eric and the others.

"Your four are dismissed same offer goes for you. I suggest you try and keep with Zoe for now, we haven't released her name but there was information put out that an initiate was activated for an op." Aiden said with a clenched jaw and I saw the other leaders weren't happy either.

Eric nodded and pulled me up with him and I could feel the tension in his shoulders. "We are going to my apartment." He said to no one and everyone.

Zeke and Logan took some kind of man code and went their own ways as Eric led me to his apartment. As soon as the door was closed her pushed me against it and started to strip me and I instantly started to strip him too.

We only managed to worry about jackets and pants before he hoisted me up and buried himself in me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on as he claimed my mouth as he pumped into me at a fast and hard pace. I could only hold on at this point and gasp against and into his mouth.

I could feel myself getting close and he was too. He broke the kiss and buried his mouth against my neck. He bit and sucked on me until that sent me tumbling and convulsing around him and he followed soon after.

My breathing slowed before his did, but he still let me down slowly before he claimed my mouth in another kiss but more gentle this time. When he pulled back he helped me straighten out my clothes first then pulled his back up.

He was still panting a bit when he leaned against me again "I can go find us something to eat if you want, and you can take a shower or just relax here while I do?" He looked down into my eyes and once again he didn't use words but his eyes and his actions.

"I will clean up a bit and change for physical training, no sense taking a shower when I am just going to be working out." I whispered and smiled up to him.

He nodded "You are getting cake, just saying. I need some so you are going to be getting some too."

I laughed and nodded "I can accept cake after this morning."

He nodded "I didn't say it and I should have. I am sorry I acted that way Zoe. I just can't lose you again but you did better than ok. You were brilliant and I wish I had some words of wisdom about what you had to do. But you summed it up perfectly." He swallowed and smiled at me.

I grinned "Thank you. I knew you didn't mean that back there. The memories coming back, they are going to be an adjustment and we will figure it out. It meant a lot to have you there beside me Eric." I whispered and he nodded.

"I'll be back shortly ok? Just going to go run to the dining hall and see if I can bribe someone, if Logan didn't already."

I laughed and nodded. He let me go by to his room to get cleaned up and changed. I had forgotten the knives in my hair and almost left them in for training but decided not to give myself temptation. I took my jacket I had taken off earlier and put it over the chair my back was on and grabbed my bag and went to the bathroom.

I got stripped out of the pants and boots I was wearing and cleaned up but put on the pants I had brought with me. I combed out and re-braided my hair but put it more up and off my neck in case I sparred and then put on deodorant and grabbed my tennis shoes. I still had my v-neck tshirt but was just going to keep that on. I grabbed the disk Max had slipped me and grabbed my dad's tablet and went out to the living room.

I powered it on and slid the small disk into the slot and waited for it to load, but checked his files on it. I scrolled through pictures he kept on it of his family, of us two from early on. I found some I didn't know he had of Eric and I, videos of us in the bunker and on the camping trips we had all started to take. Of Eric and I working on the dirt bikes together at first. There were a lot more videos of Eric and I and started to think he had put cameras in the bunker to watch us. I started to go through commands and menus and found what I was looking for. I had to smirk at him and shake my head at the same time.

Eric came in and looked at me and smiled "What is that I am hearing?"

"You are hearing my old man in his wily old ways of spying on us and me. He had cameras in the bunker and apparently made home videos of us when we were there together." I smiled and shook my head as it showed Eric and I working on the first mural version. Most of which I had painted over, but that Eric had remembered enough to paint and hang as art on his own wall.

He plopped down beside me and pulled me close and put the bag of food beside him and watched the one of working on the mural that was mostly gone and flicking pain on each other every once in awhile. He smirked at me when I had been on a ladder and "accidentally" let some paint spill into his hair.

"You were vain about your hair even then; I hated you stopping it from being all curly." I laughed as it had turned into a straight up paint fight.

"I'm still not going to give in." He grinned "Why did you paint over it? I didn't remember last night but I do now. It wasn't always the cityscape." He looked at me and pulled out the boxes of food,

I shrugged "It was extremely, personal. When you were both gone I didn't leave the bunker for almost a month. I had to do something and that was one of the things. I only started leaving again when Taylor sat outside of the Ferris wheel for two days and said she wasn't leaving unless I came and got her. Other than you, dad and now Logan and Milla she was the only person that had ever been there. Not even Edward or Mayra.

He nodded "Is that why you covered your face, on the top of the building?"

I nodded and opened the box and looked at what he had gotten and frowned "Did Logan bribe someone?" I looked at a perfect looking grilled salmon, grilled veggies and brown rice and chocolate cake.

He nodded "Yeah, he and Milla were there haggling with the ladies that work there and insisted to pay their own credits for it. Logan says tonight is on him too. It is kind of a tradition too when a new field agent not only goes out on their first op but makes their first kill, drinks are on the CO. He was the CO so he is taking it even more personal for their little sister." He smiled.

"They are going to make me a part of the team from now on aren't they?" I asked as I sprinkled the soy wasabi mix he had got for me over my salmon and rice.

He nodded "Yeah and I am too apparently, not that I am complaining because if you are there I am sure as shit going to be. I don't like that they aren't even pretending like they aren't going to send you right back out there."

"Dad thought that I might be when I got here. When you said I went to fast I remembered that he was always trying to caution me about showing too much to fast. Now I know partly why. Oh speaking of, I loaded that disk Max gave me but forgot about it when I saw the videos."

I frowned and took another bite and loaded it.

An image flashed on the screen and I gasped.

"Hey Baby Girl. If you are watching this, then I am very sorry, but it means I'm not with you anymore." The beautiful gravelly voice of my father came through as his image came up on the screen.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: (Edited for grammar and other errors) Hello. Sorry for the long delay in update. Real life can be a bitch sometimes. I am working on catching up on my stories by editing them and trying to get them broken into manageable chapters. I went old school while at the hospital with my dad for hours on end and hardwrote a bunch of the stories I have. So getting those typed up is taking a bit. I still understand cursive. Yay me! I think I am a minority at this point. Anyways, thanks for sticking with me. Hope you enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I only own my minions...I mean OC's and their plots. V Roth has everything else.**

 **Chapter 8**

" _Dad thought that I might be when I got here. When you said I went to fast I remembered that he was always trying to caution me about showing too much to fast. Now I know partly why. Oh speaking of, I loaded that disk Max gave me but forgot about it when I saw the videos."_

 _I frowned and took another bite and loaded it._

 _An image flashed on the screen and I gasped._

" _Hey Baby Girl. If you are watching this, then I am very sorry, but it means I'm not with you anymore." The beautiful gravelly voice of my father came through as his image came up on the screen._

I couldn't help the tears that welled up. I felt Eric take the food from me and lift me into his lap in the space that it took my father's image and voice to pause as if he was struggling too when he started to speak again. Eric's arms cradled me but I felt his own grief and need match my own.

"Baby Girl. Zoe, obviously this isn't how I wanted things to go for us more importantly for you. I can't help that it became necessary and as much as it is tearing me up inside to leave you. I couldn't live with myself if I didn't take action and you or Eric was hurt any more than you are already. From the moment I found out about you Zoe you have been my life and my heart. That you are the amazing and strong girl you are has been my greatest honor to be able to see."

He pauses and looks down at his hands and my hand goes to the screen to trace the lines of beautifully tanned face and arms. I inherited that skin tone that looks as if I had lay nude in the sun and emerged with this perfect tan. Jeanine had commented and tormented me about my skin color ruthlessly. So much so that I had attempted to try and bleach my own skin at the age of 4.

"I never told you exactly how I found out about you or when I found out about you. I found out about you when you were two Zoe. Jeanine had taunted me at first that she had aborted you. She took great pleasure in that. Then she let slip in one of her many deranged communications with me. She slipped into the compound and had bribed someone to keep track of my movements. She cornered me but ranted and I didn't understand much of it, but what she let slip was she gave birth to you and that you had been adopted. She let slip small details about the fact that you had a full head of that beautiful red brown hair. Your eyes were already cobalt."

There he paused again "I wouldn't change anything about you but I always wondered if maybe you had looked like her if she would have opened her heart and saw past the wrongs I did to her. I realize now Zoe, that she had already been on the path she is on. Your Uncle left for a reason and it was because there were already indications that Erudite was heading down this path. My leaving her or your birth Zoe aren't the reasons for this mess that our faction system is headed down. I know you Zoe and you are thinking that and have been your whole life. I tried to get custody of you Zoe. Your adoption wasn't anywhere to be found by the means I could afford. It wasn't until you were four that your adopted mother and my former friend Loraine contacted me. She had been told some story about what I did and why you couldn't ever be allowed near me. I think you can guess why she contacted me at that age."

He paused again "I had stolen moments with you always as a friend of you mother. She sent me pictures and videos of you. Going back to your first steps, even your birth Zoe. The vid disks I left for you along with my ring, those are all the home videos she gave me. She is there for you too Baby. I know you miss her and at least you can have that small part of her again. I was in awe of you even through a television screen. You blazed with life and a thirst for adventure and knowledge. Loraine and I knew though you were going to be coming here. You had no patience for the arrogance and stuffiness of Erudite and were pretty fucking vocal about it even at that age."

I laughed along with him and I felt Eric smile against my cheek.

"We knew trying to contact you and let you know would be risky. Things were very dangerous but not just because of the paranoia that was gripping Erudite. Factionless were becoming very unstable and we didn't know why but they were attacking anyone they thought was important in any way to Erudite. Our entire faction was on such a high alert that I was kept busy too, but I saw you every chance I got. I couldn't approach you so I could only watch you from afar. Watch you already climbing anything that you could get to but you would have a bag strapped around you with a book to read from your new Eyrie as you liked to call them. You turned my hair gray just watching you but my heart burst with pride at the same time. Then you started to try and find me even hacking into our system. I couldn't keep away any longer and when Loraine died nothing could have kept me from you. My only regret is that I didn't at least try and do that sooner."

He cleared his throat.

"I want you to know that I will never regret you for one second. I came alive again when I found you. Then when you found Eric I felt complete. I know you did too because I never saw you take to someone like you did him. You marched him right from the archives that day and straight to me. From the moment I saw him with you I knew he belonged with us and with you. He looked at you like you were the 7th wonder of the world and the biggest pain in the ass he had ever met all at the same time."

He laughed and Eric and I chuckled with him.

"He'll find you again Baby. I see glimmers sometimes when he looks at me. Or there is something that reminds me of you I see something flicker in his eyes too. He chose your colors as what he thought would make him happy. He draws you sometimes. Your eyes or the hair. Give him time and don't give up on him. Before he left Zoe, he was going to tell you that he didn't want to be seen as a brother. I know you were too young to fully get what you were feeling but you love him as something other than a brother too."

He looks down at his hands again.

"I tell myself that all that training that I did with you, it was just me making sure you would make it here. And that it was the way we bonded. I can't help but think that I was setting you up to feel that you need to take care of this on your own. And I can't have that Zoe, I trust you and you are skilled and you could probably take care of her on your own. But it wouldn't fix what is wrong and then my dream for you, to have a life Zoe where you can love and be loved. Maybe get married and have children; to be happy. My dreams for you all center on you being able to be happy and be you. I want you to not have to worry that you like to read as much as you like to fucking fight. To raise your children in the faction that I was proud to have been born in and am willingly giving my life for."

He sat up straight and gave that lopsided grin.

"If I am right, one part of the puzzle should be sitting right beside you now. Watching this and holding you. Because Baby girl there is no way he is going to see you and not do everything in his power to make you his. He is still your Eric but he is also more. You both are going to be more. Stronger and smarter and because of all the shit you have both endured you are going to fight tooth and nail to keep what you love."

"Eric I am sorry that I had to leave you like that. I hope that it doesn't cause you to doubt yourself or feel like you aren't going to be a leader that Dauntless needs. I couldn't tell you how much you actually meant to me but I hope I showed it. I wanted to tell you a million times. I even thought about taking you outside of the compound to see if seeing Zoe with might trigger something. The only reason I didn't was because she was still trying to come to terms with losing you. I couldn't get her hopes up only to be crushed later. I hope you can forgive me for all that I couldn't tell you but should have. I hope you both can forgive me for leaving you."

"I made plans to hopefully help you both. As time goes on you will be given more information but it has to go in stages. The first stage was you two together and Zoe making her way through initiation. I can't leave much guys but the bunker is now considered Dauntless approved sector living space with the permission to choose to live there instead of the compound if you would like. It is tied up to your names so it can't be passed to anyone unless you two do it. That means if you want you can live there indefinitely. The location is also not open knowledge and is a Level 0 clearance. That means that if it needs to be a fallout shelter if shit hits the fan you are authorized to move operations there with the authority of at least 3 leaders. Max, Eric…Zoe. That is part of the plan Zoe. You will need to take an active role to be able to help get our home back on its path. The next step is to set up an ops team that we can trust to go out for those jobs that might need to get done. If I know you Baby girl you aren't going to be able to hold back and you will rise in the initiate ranks fast. I am not sure but I think you will at the very least be recognized for advanced weaponry and demolitions. You are already well on the road for intel and tech advancement. Maybe even weaponry with how much you fiddle around in the workshop. Max will have more details if it progresses the way we think."

"The next thing that I was able to do is provide income cushion. Everything that I have that could be traded or sold that wasn't sentimental or valuable to you two in other ways has been traded or sold and put in with the credits that I have accumulated over the years that I hadn't ever really spent. I was also able to work with a loophole that will recognize you as my surviving dependent. It required dna matching of course but Max worked it out and those benefits will be added to that account at the time of my death. I will be considered line of duty Zoe. The honors for that allow for good benefits but also my name will always be respected. This also allows you to claim me as your father openly like you we always wanted baby. If you still want this then tell Max after you watch this video. He will arrange it formally."

"I love you both. Eric, treat her right and remember that it is ok to be angry and need to argue. You don't have to hold it all in because she won't hesitate to let you know exactly what is on her mind. She won't break, she won't give up on you and she won't ever think you are less then because of the darkness you both have. Sometimes you have to walk through the darkness to find the light and those who have never known that darkness will never be able to truly appreciate that light when they find it. You two have walked and hell even lived in that darkness. You will know when you find that light. Fight for it with what means you have because it is precious. You are precious to me."

"This isn't goodbye you two. I believe that with everything I am. You two will find each other and then when the time comes we will all find each other again. But I expect you two to fucking live your lives, truly live them. No matter what don't let each other go again."

With that the video was done and I was crying but it was a mix of a happy and sad cry.

I turned to Eric and buried myself in his chest as he buried his head in my shoulder.

"I love you Zoe. I know that I have for longer than I can truly remember but it courses through my blood Baby. From the moment I saw you again I came alive again."

"I love you too Eric. It was always ever you that had my heart fully. I hope you understand that Tris and the others are the same as you. I have a strong love for them but in a different way. I felt…."

"You felt like something was ripped away from you and you would never be whole again. Nothing could fill it enough to make up for that loss." He whispered against me.

I pulled back and so did he. "Yes. I saw you on the roof and I had to distance my emotions from what I really wanted to do. I wanted to walk right up to you and tell you who I was and what you meant to me. Maybe in a kiss, I am not sure. But I didn't see that you saw me as Zoe that you knew. So I couldn't get my hopes up. But you were different when you were talking to me than when I saw you at Erudite and tried to talk to you. I started to feel a bit more whole every time we talked. Like a part of me that had been dead was suddenly coming back to life in me."

He cupped my face and kissed me hungrily he stood up with me in his arms and carried me bridal style to his bed and laid me down on it "Fuck training for the rest of the day. This is more important right now. I think Max knew that too." He said as he had followed me up the bed and looked into my eyes. Letting me see the need he felt for me.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

 _He cupped my face and kissed me hungrily he stood up with me in his arms and carried me bridal style to his bed and laid me down on it "Fuck training for the rest of the day. This is more important right now. I think Max knew that too." He said as he had followed me up the bed and looked into my eyes. Letting me see the need he felt for me._

I nodded and kissed him and let him undress me. He took his time undressing me as if savoring this moment. When he was done he smirked at me because he knew I was going to insist that I be able to do the same and I did.

I hadn't been able to truly explore him before now but I took advantage of that and he let me. He patiently let me run my hands along his chest, arms, abdomen, it was when I got lower that the patience snapped and he stopped me from doing the exploring I had meant to do.

He dragged me back up to his mouth and my naked body slid against his as he pulled me back up him. Both of our eyes closed as we took pleasure in that even. The feel of the ripples of his muscles sliding across my own less chiseled ones. The friction of skin on skin. The heat from our bodies and the way my core and his lined up perfectly and almost called to each other with how much heat they produced. We savored every moment of that and each other.

Our mouths found each other and began to explore and take turns leading. He had moved me so that I lay beside him but we both lay on our sides pressing into each other. My hands went to his back to explore the ridges, dips and hardness.

Eric broke the kiss and moved to kiss along my neck "Mine Zoe…you're mine." He whispered this not as a command but almost like a reassurance to himself.

I gasped as he dragged his tongue along my neck and then began to make his marks again but I didn't care. "I'm yours Eric, always all yours." I whispered as he crushed his lips to mine and his aggressive side started to wake up as he hands moved to claim my pleasure for themselves first.

He parted my folds and teased by rubbing along then and around my clit before giving in to my urgent gasps and moans and started to rub in gentle circles. My body arched in pleasure but also frustration because it was too soft. My brow furrows as my hips move to try and gain for friction and to try and speed the pace.

"You're mine Zoe. My pace." He growls in my ear and then slides on finger into me and watches as my face flickers with the pleasure and still that frustration that I needed more. "Ask me for it Baby. Tell me what you want" He says this as he withdraws his fingers completely.

"Please Eric I want you…I want you to take me." I moaned out. "My Eric, you know how I should have you."

He breathed against me "Zoe, I should be able to be gentle with you. I want too but..."

I grasped his head and pulled him to me for a searing kiss where are teeth met and tongues battled. My hand traveled down to grasps him as I began to work up and down his length. He broke the kiss moaning and panting.

He moved back to my neck as he gave in and met my pace on his hardness as his fingers delved back into me.

My hips moved against him "I want this Eric and who you are now…all of you, not who think you should be. I want all of you now Eric."

He knew how to move his fingers inside of me and on my clit that had me at the edge soon "Cum for me baby.." He moaned as his own hips worked to help as I stroked him.

Within seconds of him asking me to give him my pleasure my walls tightened around him and my body shook as I gasped "Eric…." And then my core had an orgasm like it had never had in the previous times where it emulated a man's climax almost.

At the feel of this the last of Eric's reservations of being the him he is now and not who his memories were trying to tell him he should be. He pulled his hands from me only to replace it with his entire length in one hard thrust. He buried himself deep within me. He moved my legs so that the where on either side of his head and paused there only long enough to lick the fingers that had collected their prize.

His eyes closed as he savored the flavor of my climax and as he did I promised myself I would find out what his tasted like too. I realized that I must have said that allowed my his eyes snapping open and he was so fueled with lust by my words that his pupils were so dilated the color of his eyes was almost nonexistent.

He started to thrust into me again as the same time as he leaned into me and again claimed my mouth. With each hard thrust I could feel his thighs slamming into my ass. The sensations of him hitting deep within me, the feel of his flesh colliding with mine, his hands that had moved to cup tweak and flick my breasts and nipples had me on overload. I couldn't process each sensation for me to store and review later like I do normally.

I let myself be overwhelmed and moaned into his mouth as I clawed at his back and arms. I got brave at one point and reached down between us and moved my hand so that my fingers were spread into a v and I felt him as he thrust into me.

"Fuck Zoe, you feel so fucking good Baby." He growled when he felt my hand move to experience our joining.

"Eric you make me feel so good. Don't stop please…I am so close…harder baby."

I squeezed my fingers together so that I could feel his length as it plunged into me.

He growled and slammed into me harder and I cried out in pleasure again and couldn't talk if I had tried. Neither could he so he made me look at him as he felt me go to the edge. With a wicked smile he paused and then started again but this time he was rotating his hips in an almost circular motion. A hand went to my braid and pulled until my neck was exposed and he locked eyes with me.

"Cum Now!" He commanded me and tilted so that he hit another new spot and I was gone. The cry that tore from my throat was nothing but raw pleasure being satisfied at the most base level.

My walls clamped down on him and I helped it along as well by using my inner muscles and I knew I had taken his pleasure from him as I looked at him with a wicked smile of my own.

"Fuck." He roared as he emptied in me. He kept pumping in me while he spilled into me completely. "Zoe" He began to whisper over and over until he was spent and collapsed on me and immediately began to kiss me softly and cradled my face gently.

He positioned us so that he was still inside me but we could be laying down beside each other. I was on my back and he was on his side pressed close to me. One of my legs was propped over his legs and my hips were tilted so that we had as many points of contact as possible without losing the ability to remain joined together.

He kissed my forehead and before he settled his head to lay on the pillow where mine lay. His hand traces along my face and my collarbones "I keep thinking I need to be how I was before I lost you. I would never have thought about taking you like that then."

"Eric." I sighed his name "You are still the you from then, you just have lived more years and those experiences shape us. At the core it is still you but just the man and not the teen. I am still Zoe in my core but I am not the girl I was then. The urges we have now, I can't help but think that even had you still been with me and known me we would still have most of the same wants and likes. We both were never very eloquent. We spoke in different ways, we shared art and fighting and weapons. I loved to work with technology and machines. We branched out even then and found differences but in the end it is still us. I don't want to change who you are now because of memories. We can't live in those."

He smirked "For someone who says they aren't very eloquent you sure as hell sound it. When did you gain all of this wisdom Zoe Salvador."

I grinned cheekily "Sometimes I just talk out of my ass and hope it sounds right in the end. Fake it until you can make it."

He laughed along with me "I would say you have been hanging out with Logan too long but I can't even blame that one on him." He got serious and quiet for a moment, his hand taking mine and gently rubbing against the ring finger on my left hand. "Have you thought about it?"

I quirk an eyebrow "Thought about what babe?"

He smiled at me calling him babe "What your Dad said he wanted for you, for us. Had you thought about it?"

I frowned "Before I lost you I can say yes I did. It was just a young girls dreams but it was always you in it. Then after I lost you I didn't even think I would ever try any type of relationship with anyone else. We know how that attempt turned out; even with him though I didn't. Did you?"

He looked at me for a while "Before I went away yes. When I couldn't remember you I sometimes dreamed of having that but I didn't see it happening. If I tried to date, something was missing from them. So I stopped trying to date. And now Zoe I do see at least one part of it. I won't lose you from my life again and whatever that is defined as is up to you. We have time, though I do feel this urgency to take everything I can now in case it is taken from me again."

I nod "I understand, I feel something of the same way. We have a lot to figure out Eric; between us and Jeanine. We need to talk to Max and then I think we should make sure the bunker is set up if we need to retreat there."

He nodded and swallowed before closing his eyes. "Zoe…I…" He stops opening his eyes and looking at me with everything he is feeling showing. "Will you be mine Zoe? I know I said we have time…but I feel like we have waited long enough."

My heart felt like it would burst but at the same time I was filled with such doubt about my own worth…leftover doubts and hissed insults are always there in the back of my mind. I am selfish and I don't care about being that way right now. So I take a deep breath and nod as I release it slowly.

"Say it please Zoe" He whispers against my shoulder.

"Yes Eric I will be yours. I have always been yours but in the way you mean…yes."

Eric raises up to find my mouth and kisses me deeply and gently. His hands skim along my body as our tongues twine together. We break apart only to begin kissing again, repeating this over and over as he moves within me. It is gentle at first…but we both know that won't last. This time I get impatient and move so that I am straddling him. He positions himself so he is propped up enough to hold me or take my nipples in his mouth, his teeth grazing or tugging. I move on him in fast movements, bouncing on his length.

"Eric…" I gasp as I grasp his face and bring him to my mouth while still slamming myself down on him.

He growls and meets my thrusts down with his own thrusts up. Our bodies colliding and his length going deep within me that it is almost painful, but I love it. So I tell him that.

"I love this baby….feels so good…you feel good…" I pant out in between our thrusts.

"Zoe, you're everything." he says before he pulls me back to his mouth.

I add rocking motions to my thrusts and it hits on my clit and a spot inside of me that sends me over the edge, my muscles are merciless in how I make them grasp him. I break apart from the kiss and look him in the eyes.

"Cum Eric, I want to feel you give me that." I demand.

He growls and puts even more force in his thrusts and I try to hold off on my own release but he won't have that. One hand grabs my hair pulling my head to where he wants it and he bites down in the spot he has found that will always set me off.

"Fuck! Eric." I cry as I shatter completely unable to fight my release off. He gives me his own at the same time.

"All yours." He cries against my neck as he pumps into me one more time…hard before holding me still and wrapping his arms around me. His head lays against my chest, both of our hearts beating so hard and fast it almost feels like they will burst from our body. We stay there panting, my hands find his hair and I work my fingers against his scalp as I lean my head down and press kisses to his forehead and the top of his head.

When our hearts and breathing has calmed, we pull apart only far enough to look at each other. He smiles and there is no trace of coldness or shutters between us. The rest of the world will never see us like this, but for each other we will bare our very souls. There is the light for me it is him and all those I have come to care for. For him it is me and the very few he has allowed in, but I see the shadow of those I care about in his light too. Because I care for them he will bring them only so far as needing to protect them for my sake.

There is our darkness and it centers on one person that can trigger it like no other. The truth is that our darkness is as much as part of ourselves as our eye color or personality quirks. The truth is we were born with it and we have come to accept it but we will not let it consume us or control us.

His hands move up my back lazily as he presses a kiss to just over my heart. The find themselves on the sides of my face, cupping the back of my head as his brow furrow. "I want to talk to Max, Zoe. Before we go out for the night I want to arrange a meeting. I meant what I said about not wanting to wait…and I want to talk to him about that tonight."

I nod and press a kiss to his mouth gently. "I know, patience isn't either of our strongest suits."

He gives a lopsided grin and pulls back "Are you going to want a.."

I stop him by shaking my head "No, I am not that type of girl Eric. I may want Tris there for sure. I know you will want Logan. The rest will understand we aren't those people."

He nods smiling "Milla will skin you though you know. I will message Max. I think he will be expecting us to contact him. I love you Zoe."

I smile and I am sure that damn dimple is showing. "I love you Eric."

He brings me to his mouth for a passionate kiss that we let those emotions pour through until he pulls away and reluctantly untangled from me. He heads goes to get his tablet phone as I head to his bathroom to take that shower I had put off. I smile when he slips in with me and pulls me for a brief kiss before he pulls back and smiles.

"He was expecting our message, he will be here in 30 minutes. We will talk about it here and then…we can decide from there when and where." He says almost anxious and nervous.

"I am not going to change my mind you know. There was never any going back for me once I knew you wanted me. My only hesitation Eric, was making sure you knew the whole truth." I whisper against his chest.

I feel the tension leave his body and his sigh of relief. I feel his smirk against my forehead. "There was no way I wasn't making you mine Zoe. I may not have understood why I knew for certain you were mine, but I knew there was no way that I wasn't going to do everything I could to make you see that and fast."

I let out a sigh of my own and nod. We don't need any more words for now and he lovingly washes me before I do the same for him. We exit out of the shower and get dressed then head out to the living room. Our food was reheated, because my stomach let me know it was very angry, and we ate as we waited. I went through the tablet again after having picked up the vid discs that my dad had left me. We ate as we watching videos of me when I was younger. I couldn't bring myself to watch that of my birth, Eric understood completely.

We had just finished eating our cake when the knock on the door came. I took a tremulous breath and nodded to Eric who opened the door. Max walked in and put a hand on Eric's shoulder. Eric closed the door and nodded to Max in understanding.

Max took me in sitting on the couch and he approached unsure of what to do so I stood and hugged him. His arms closed around me and he returned the hug with a big squeeze and a sigh of relief before he stepped out of the hug and let Eric take his place by my side. He took a seat on one portion of the L shaped sofa and we the other. I was in the crook of Eric's arm and we were both faced towards Max.

He smiled looking between the two of us. "He said you two wouldn't be long in discovering each other again. I had hoped for your sake Zoe that he recognized something in you that would make that possible. I will also admit that I had worries Eric, not that you yourself would want to hurt her. I worried about that crazy bitch having done something to you that would make you do something. Do you know that has actually been in my fear landscape? I usually go under once a year and since your Father approached me and told me what was going on…it has been there ever since. Along with her succeeding in her plans of course."

He stopped frowning at that as if he was in his fear sim at that moment. I smiled at him "It won't happen sir. Either one but for sure we will not let her succeed." I say firmly.

"She is right about that. There was no way I could blame her or would my mind allow me to hurt her, no matter what the bitch had done. Somehow I shouldn't remember, but as soon as Zoe came back to me it was unlocked and there is nothing in the world that is going to take her or that away from me again." Eric says as he takes my hand in his and looks at me as he speaks to Max.

We smile at each other and then look back to Max. He gives a nod and a smile of happiness. "What would you like to talk about first?"

Eric raises his chin and his spine goes stiff "First I would like to arrange for Zoe to become my wife; tonight if possible."

Max tilts his head and smirks "Well that was another thing he was right about. As you know Eric I can marry you both so that wouldn't be a problem. I did make a promise to your father Zoe. He said you might fight it a bit…"

I groan and Max smiles while Eric quirks and eyebrow and squeezes me. I look up at him and he shrugs "It doesn't have to be big Zoe. I think he just wants it to be done right for his baby girl. Am I right Max?"

Max still has the smirk and nods "He made me promise that it would be at least some type of ceremony with whatever friends you felt closest to present. I do need to ask Zoe did you give any thought to acknowledging him?"

"Of course I want to Max. I already told those closest to me and Eric at lunch yesterday. I have wanted to be known for once as _his_ daughter. Even before his sacrifice Max, he was my hero and besides Eric he was my everything. Can we announce that before the ceremony to Dauntless or how would that go?"

Max tilted his head "As Eric is a leader and you Zoe are already a leader in training. I had already had that motion passed before you set foot on the roof essentially. Logan, Aiden and myself signed off on it. As you are both leaders we will need to make an announcement and even plan a celebration. We can do the celebration part for the weekend, but we can make the announcement tonight at dinner. We would be making all three announcements to be exact."

He pauses to let us soak that in and I am frowning "Sir, I am very honored to be given leader in training, but how does that work with the fact that I am still in initiation?"

Eric smiles "Because you will be moving directly to the leader training. Which supersedes the initiation training in cases like this. We can still work alongside the group for our physical portions and the fear sims but the weapons time we would normally have we can forgo and move to the leadership duties, paperwork..all of that aspect of it. I will be doing her training, correct?" Eric phrased it as a question but it wasn't really.

Max snorts and smiles "As if you would allow it any other way. Yes she will be under you and Logan. She will also work with Aiden for a bit in Weapons and Development. I believe you can agree that she will excel in those three areas for sure. Logan, you , Zoe and myself will be the only ones that will know about the other missions and ops you will have to run. Of course Zeke will know but not on the full levels you will. As Amar stated, this will go in stages and the less people that know the better. So for now, we concentrate on the goals you want to do now."

I nod "Then it will be in the order of our announcements and the ceremony. But sir I need to still be involved in training as much as possible. That is a priority to me right now." I say firmly and my eye hard.

Max nods "I understand and I know you will want to be able to still the extra training. Logan has already said as much. I fully support that as you will need those you can trust to be around you Zoe. But that will also be why we will need to set up the bunker is a fall back area. You can decide who you will allow to have the security access to it and who you will allow from here in there. I can give you a list of people that you may check out, but that I believe would be beneficial to help out and that you might want with you should Dauntless come under the worst case scenario."

Eric nodded "I will take that list and I am sure we can have Logan run any checks we need. Could you tell Zoe about what a wedding ceremony can consist of please and I admit I do not know much about it either."

Max laughs and I smile "They are usually pretty simple. We aren't a bunch of poets around here so I have a small ceremony of joining you together. You can write your own vows or I can provide you with a few scripted ones. You wear what you would like and if you want you can exchange rings. Zoe, your father let me know if you wanted to use his ring for Eric you can, and I have been holding onto a ring that was your grandmothers. It is your decisions and Amar made me promise to tell you he does not expect it, but if you had thought about it but were unsure he wanted it known he loves you both and would be happy in any decision."

I feel myself tearing up and I look to Eric who smiles and nods to me. "I would like Eric to at least wear my father's. I would love to see if I can even wear my grandmothers. If it fits me…then yes." I say my voice full of emotion.

Max smiles "So all you two need to do is get your friends together or decide who of them you want present and then decide what you are going to be wearing. I will go to my office and start getting all the damn paperwork ready and the marriage license. I will also get started on the paperwork and announcement that Amar's daughter is home finally. If you would just come by my office in an hour and we can work out the details."

He stands and Eric stands with him and sees him out. I sit on the couch still frowning slightly. I try to think of who I wouldn't want there of our friends and I don't feel there is anyone I wouldn't want there. Eric sits beside me and pulls me on his lap.

"So you know Milla and Lauren are going to want to take you dress shopping and to the salon and probably set up some place to get married other than Max's office, right?" He says with a smile at my defeat at knowing all that is true.

I nod and sigh "Zeke will want his girlfriend there, she seems nice enough although I don't know her as well. Other than that it is just our group. Are you going to feel awkward with Edward or Peter there?"

He shakes his head with a smirk. "No, in fact I will love them seeing they will never be able to have you."

I roll my eyes and sigh "Well, I guess we need to get this started. How are we going to even pull this off, everyone is in training?"

Eric rolls his eyes "Because of the 'attack' and the investigation into it, training was canceled for the rest of the day. Max probably arranged that. But they were also concerned about the leak of information. We found our it came from one of the guards that happened to be passing by and saw a trainee go into the room but come out in full gear. He is being taken care of and will be spending the remained of the year on the fence. So I guess we just need to go track down your friends and I will message Logan."

I felt butterflies creating a monsoon in my stomach, not about being with Eric…but about having to do this whole ceremony thing. "They better not try putting me in anything fucking frilly or some foul ass pink color." I growl and Eric laughs pulling me to him.

"Agreed baby." He nuzzles my neck and pulls up his messages and starts the process. I am still scowling at what they might try to force me into when ten minutes later there is the unmistakable knock of at least one very excited person.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hey guys! Wanted to let you know there will be chapters coming soon. I am doing full edits of all previous chapters and organizing all the handwritten work I had done on the story and several others. The holidays put a stop to some of this but I am working on it. So Chapters coming soon and sorry about the wait!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thank everyone for waiting so patiently. I was able to get this chapter inputed and translated from my handwritten things. I am still doing a full edit for the entire story and just filling in some holes or correcting grammar and spelling as I go. I will be updating those chapters over the week. No major changes just maybe making some vague things clear or hopefully deepening the tone or character reactions during conversations. Hope everyone enjoys, we are finally getting the wedding. As always really appreciate the views, reviews, favorites and follows!**

 **Disclaimer: This is still V Roth's thunderdome and I am still just tossing in my own little stick figures to play with the Mad Maxx's of her world. (PPS Jai Courtney as Mad Maxx...yeah I could live with that ;D)**

 **Chapter 10**

 _I felt butterflies creating a monsoon in my stomach, not about being with Eric…but about having to do this whole ceremony thing. "They better not try putting me in anything fucking frilly or some foul ass pink color." I growl and Eric laughs pulling me to him._

" _Agreed baby." He nuzzles my neck and pulls up his messages and starts the process. I am still scowling at what they might try to force me into when ten minutes later there is the unmistakable knock of at least one very excited person._

I groan as Eric moves me from his lap and goes to the door. I have been setting my father's tablet phone up as mine and going through things. Milla has already been rapid fire messaging me.

Eric opens the door and gives a groan of his own. He jerks his head and in file Lauren, Milla, Mar, Lynn, Tris, and Shauna.

Shauna hangs back but I am rushed by all of the other girls. Logan trails in with a smirk followed by Four, Uri and Zeke.

Milla pulls back from the hug and beams happily at me. "We have it all worked out and we aren't going to make it all obnoxious. We found a good spot in the leader apartments on the top floor. Max said you guys needed to go up there after you go to his office anyways. So it will be on a balcony and have a few lights hanging."

Lauren smiled "And you can pick the dress Zoe, but we still get to pick a bunch for you to choose from. You still have to go to the saloon because we were going anyways."

I wait for more but there isn't and I look around between everyone "That's it? You aren't going to tell me that it has to be some god fucking awful color or that you want to release fucking butterflies or some shit like that?"

Tris smirks, shaking her head. "No. But I did say that it might be cool if you were able to shoot the fifty cal and blow something up at the end. I was vetoed."

I actually wanted to cry and teared up. I hugged Tris. "Oh that is so sweet Tris. God dammit why can't we do that?" I rage and I hear the guys all chuckling then I see Shauna turn to Zeke.

"You are right, she is practically made for him." She whispered incredulously, which causes laughter in all of my friends.

"You are right she is practically made for him." She whispered incredulously, which causes laughter in all of my friends.

I have time to grab my credits card and jacket, then a quick kiss to Eric. That turned into a not so quick kiss because neither of us really wanted to be separated. I pulled away first which caused him to growl and me smirk. I reached behind my neck to pull the chain that had my father's ring on it from my neck. He took my hands as we leaned against his kitchen counter. "Are you sure baby?"

"Absolutely. Why wouldn't I want you to wear it? It will still be close to my heart, considering you are my heart Eric." I blush at saying something so cheesy but Eric just pulls me close to him for another kiss. We both are made to pull apart by multiple coughs coming from the living room.

"I love you and I will see you soon." Eric says as he presses his forehead to mine.

"Let's hope it isn't too horrible; this whole dress shopping shit." I frown and he smirks at me then leans in to whisper.

"Well just think of it this way, the dress will look really fucking good on our floor afterwards."

I started to reply with a kiss but instead am left growling as I am pulled away by Tris. She looks to Eric with an apology. "Sorry they threatened me with being put into dresses next if I didn't." Her voice was desperate so I took pity on her and shook my head.

"Love you." I am able to get out before I get pulled away and out of the door scowling to the chuckles of everyone but Eric who isn't that pleased and more resigned.

Milla links one arm with mine and practically skips along pulling me ahead. "We can't do the salon now but we can after you guys meet Max.

 _Almost an hour and ten minutes later_

I frown and look at myself in the mirror. "I don't hate it." I admit and the girls all sag in relief.

"Thank fuck." Lynn mutters and looks over at the pile of dresses I had refused to even try on, then the other pile that I had ripped off almost as soon as I put on.

I run my hands over the mid riff top that has a cream colored underlay with a nice black lace overlay and then a skirt the picks up just at the belly button and goes to the knee in front but to the ankle in back. It has the same material too. I turn and nod with a smile.

"I like it. I don't want to wear white guys, so that isn't me. But this I can do." I smile and look over at Milla who already put Tris in a dress. She at least didn't make it too revealing. All the girls had decided to wear dresses.

I smiled as I took in the sapphire blue dress with thin straps that went to the knee on Tris. It had a slight v neck and was tight up top but flared out at the hips. Milla kept calling it a skater dress and I kept telling her that as a skater it would be fucking ridiculous to wear that shit. She had laughed hard at that.

Milla sighs and hugs me happily. "You're right, this dress is perfect. We already know you wanted the low heeled black strappy sandals. I think you should keep the earrings and bracelet from your father and Eric. Now we just need to get you up to Max's office. Eric is apparently wearing the carpet out from what Logan is saying. The girls, except for Tris and I, are going to head to the salon so that it won't take all of all that long to get ready after."

I nod thinking of something suddenly. "Milla, I won't be staying at the dorm…." I trail off frowning and worried as the thought had just struck me.

Tris hugged me and nodded. "Peter said he would move to the bunk below mine and Logan said if we wanted we could move to the Dauntless-born dorm. Or at the very least I could move there and Peter and Edward can stay with the transfers."

I sagged with relief and smiled. "Please can you go to the Dauntless-born ones. Peter and Edward too would be great too."

Tris smiled and nodded. "Eric already went and got your stuff apparently from what Edward said when he was here. It gave him something to do and then Logan drug him off to do something shopping wise that Milla gave him instruction wise."

I quirked an eyebrow at her and she shrugged. "You can't be the only one somewhat dressed up. But it isn't like he is going to be in a suit or anything."

I nod frowning and move to get changed. Milla had added a few more dresses and outfits she wanted me to have and that she thought I would need over the next week and for the weekend. I had handed my card over and she went off to get that done.

I had also asked her to get some outfits for Tris that were in keeping with who she was. As we walked out with the bags we went by a shop and I paused and grinned at what I saw there. "Hey, I need to do something in here really quick." I mutter and go in. The shop owner loved my request and would work on getting the items I wanted made. Otherwise, I walked out a box of beautiful Chinese throwing stars.

Lynn, Mar, Shauna and Lauren all gave me hugs and left to go to the salon. Milla and Tris walked with me to the offices.

"Zoe, do you want maybe some flowers? Eric wanted to get you something and he thought he remembered that you like lilies and hydrangea but he isn't for sure on that." Milla frowned reading her tablet.

I smiled at that and blush a little. "Those are actually my favorite ones but I don't have to have them and where would they get them anyways?"

Milla shrugged with a bit of a smirk. "Somewhere that he sent a group out to pick up pretty much as soon as we walked out."

Milla looked over at me as I was smiling softly and she nudged me. "He wants to make it nice for you."

I nod, still smiling. "He has to know the only thing I care about is that in the end we get to be together." Tris and Milla share a smile and nod.

He must have been listening for us, or maybe our laughter alerted him that we were finally there. Whatever it was, Eric threw open the door to Max's office with a scowl but as soon as he saw me the scowl vanished and he looked almost relieved. He smirked when he saw the bags we were carrying and pulled me into the office.

"Was it bad?" He asked almost laughing.

I gave a chuckle and shook my head. "For the girls and the shop clerks, yeah it was bad."

Tris gave a laugh when she and Milla walked in behind me. "You should have seen her scowl and her tossing the dresses right back over the dressing room door as soon as they were handed in. I think the clerk just brought the entire store at that point."

Eric, Max and Logan all gave chuckles. "Well it looks like she got at least a little something." Eric muttered and then looked at me with a quirked eyebrow when he saw the box I was carrying. "What have you go there Zoe?"

He was already pulling the box from me and opening it. His face lit up when he caught sight of the contents. "Throwing stars?" He started to laugh and lifted one up. "Shit this is nice. Barely weighs anything. Carbon Steel?"

I nod smugly and rock back and forth on my feet. "Yep, four point lightweight carbon steel throwing steel. I had them put a sealant on them though to keep the oil and fingerprints off them. Fucking hate smudges on my stars, and it shows up more because of it being such a deep black."

He hums a little and nods as fiddles with them a little. A throat clears behind him and he smirks then winks at me. "Well we can have some fun with these later. Hell we might even see about breaking them out during training when we get to the knives portion."

I beam at that. "Excellent!"

"Maybe we should get to the business at hand." Max said in a highly amused tone.

With a chuckle we both put up the stars and then set aside my bags. He takes my hand and we move over to the chairs in front of Max's desk. I can see why Max was disgruntled about paperwork, this is a ridiculous amount of it. I sign all the paperwork for not only acknowledging my father and the transfer of his assets, but the leadership in training paperwork that has all my new status information. Finally we get to the marriage paperwork and Max goes over the ceremony.

Something felt off with it. It was simple and I loved that, but with all that we had been through I felt like that needed to be acknowledged. With help from everyone there, including Max, we got new vows made up. They were still completely Dauntless, Eric and I, and addressing what we have been through and will go through.

"We have everything in order with the paperwork for the most part. The other matters we talked about earlier can wait until Monday. For now, Zoe here is the ring that belonged to your grandmother." Max sat a black box with the Dauntless symbol on it. It was small like a ring box should be. With a bit of trembling hands I picked up the box and opened it.

It was perfect and simple. There were two rings, that made up a bridal ring set. They were both in black gold but the bands were thin and delicate looking. In the engagement ring there was a single princess cut red garnet that had two black diamonds to either side of it. The band alternated between small red garnets and black diamonds set into the band itself.

I smiled as I saw them and I could see Eric was happy with the design but also the meaning it had for both of us too. With smile still in place he plucked out the engagement ring and looked to me for permission.

I am sure my dimple was showing as I smiled and blushed, but I nodded and held out my hand for him. He never broke his eyes from mine as he slipped it on. It fit almost perfectly but was just a tiny bit loose. I held back the tears that threatened me at the fact that I would be able to wear something from my father's family. That they would live on through me and us.

"It's perfect baby." Eric whispered as he brought me over to sit in his lap and kissed me.

It was a soft kiss, sharing the words we wouldn't say out loud with everyone around of how much this meant to us.

Afterwards when we broke apart, Max indicated we should all head up to the apartment that had been chosen for the ceremony. When Max opened the door he had a bit of a smirk and Eric and I exchanged looks.

"What are you up to Max?" Eric asked calmly but I could tell he was wary.

"One other thing I promised Amar was that even if you did decided to stay at the bunker, I would have this set up for you. Eric turned it down because he didn't feel like he was worthy of it. It never sat right with Amar and he knew if plans went how we hoped then Zoe would be living with you soon. He felt that she had enough of underground living and he thought you both deserved the view from up here." His tone was also completely smug as he ushered Eric and I in first.

It was a big apartment and he was the right, the view was stunning. I could see the ferris wheel pretty clearly even from the doors that led to the balcony. The entire apartment looked like a big loft with brick, plaster and beams. It was an almost open concept with industrial lighting and the wood floors. Eric squeezed my hand and looked to me. I smiled and nodded at him. He shrugged and smiled too. "I don't mind moving up here, if you want to Zoe. I don't care where I am at as long as you are there too."

"Me too, but I don't want you to have to change everything in your life just because…" He didn't even let me finish as he pulled me to him and kissed me.

"I meant it when I said I came alive again when you came back into my life. I slept there, I didn't live there, there was no life in that place for me. I'm not giving up shit Zoe. I'm gaining a whole lot though." He cupped my cheek and made sure I understood before he turned to Max.

"We'll take it. I guess let's figure out the whole ceremony thing." He muttered the last part.

Logan shook his head. "Milla, Lauren and Shauna are all putting that together on the balcony. After that we will just grab dinner in the dining hall, make the announcements and then celebrate at the club."

I sigh and smile. "That sounds better than some big long drawn out affair. I can live with that."

Milla smiled from Logan's arms. "We knew you wouldn't want a whole lot of attention or anything too girly Zoe. It wouldn't be you or Eric."

Milla, Tris and I could stick around for another ten minutes or so. Milla was on an "Operation Move the Coulter's" Kick and was shooting off more texts and talking with Logan about organizing everything.

I tried to tell her that it wasn't necessary to get us moved in tonight but Logan and Milla had just scowled at me. The apartment already came with furnishings and it was all in the same style that Eric had but just larger to fit the bigger space. All that would need to be done is move everything that we wanted at the compound up to the apartment.

I told Tris about the bunker and we made plans that weekend to go there. We would need to get her set up in the security system and I wanted her to pick out a room. Eric was less than enthused at first about taking Peter and Edward along but he seemed to accept it as inevitable anyways.

Soon I was drug off to the salon. We would need to get that done and then go back to the new apartment to get ready. Tris and I shared grimaces. She was insistent she wasn't going to be cutting lots of her hair off and I agreed.

It wasn't a horrible experience. Milla and Lauren really were like big sisters and while they could be pushy at times, they were also protective of Tris and I. When we had to keep telling the stylists we weren't coloring our hair or going wild on cuts, they interceded and set them straight. Those girls could be just as damn scary as I knew I could be.

Tris got her hair cut to just past her shoulders but let them put in layers so that it picked up on a bit of waviness she didn't know she had. She could still wear it up and in her bun but they also shower her how to do braids down the center and sides of her head that would hold better during fighting or sparring. We both loved that idea. The haircut on her though looked natural and added to her new found confidence she was gaining in just a short time. She looked alluring even with the simple but still Dauntless makeup they applied. It made her eyes blue green eyes stand out.

My hair they put longer layers in so that my curls would be more manageable and they softened them for tonight. They also fixed my bangs so that they were more to the side and didn't get into my eyes as much. I ended up with about the same length as Tris. I had to admit that without it being so long it did feel a bit lighter and freeing.

My makeup was kept simple too and overall the experience wasn't bad. I just wanted to hurry up and get the ceremony over with as well as the announcements. Being announced in front over everyone is what had me nervous. That I just wanted to see what Eric would be in.

"He is going to be getting ready at the old apartment." Milla said as she was looking at her phone. She had been on it while she was getting worked on. Both her and Lauren had been really, until Lauren left to get the setup started. "The guys are all going to be there getting ready but also getting everything packed up and moved for you two. Luckily there really isn't much other than his books, movies and weapons."

She smirked and rolled her eyes at that last part. I couldn't help the laugh at the image that he would have just as many weapons as books.

"Are you nervous?" Tris asked with a smile as we were having finishing touches put on.

I sigh and frown in thought. "About marrying Eric? Not at all. About having to stand in front of the entire Dauntless population and have attention on me, yeah that part I am not loving."

Milla snorts and shakes her head. "So a lifelong commitment you aren't blinking an eye at, but standing in front of a group of people being cheered and clapped at for a total of maybe ten minutes, that you are jumpy about."

I laugh and shrug. "I don't like attention on just me. I guess if feel…." I frown and shrug as I trail off.

How do I explain the feeling of not being worth praise or the feeling of what she has done to me….all those times I was examined like a freak.

Tris must have sensed that it was something deep and not something I could talk about lightly, because she interjected by asking about what jewelry that Milla had picked out she should wear.

This changed the mood and subject as we finished up and headed off.

They had certainly been busy. The girls and the others had gotten the balcony all set up by the time we were dressed and ready. They did keep it simple. There were no chairs but there were lights. The balcony had a stone wall that surrounded it. There was also an overhang that provided some cover too. Our friends had managed to get strings of soft white lights hung from the overhang and crossed over to posts set up on the balcony wall. Small pots of flowers were interspersed along the wall and then near where the ceremony would take place.

The only other decoration was what looked to be a curtain of the same kinds of lights that were at that same end where Eric and I would stand to marry each other.

There wasn't a real aisle for me to walk but Milla said they were going to scatter petals of the flowers to make one. Edward would be walking me down the flower aisle.

"Time for you to go back to the bedroom." Milla and Shauna ushered me quickly to the master bedroom, as I scowled at them.

"What? Why?" I growled out.

Shauna smiled "Because it is bad luck or some shit like that. What was the reason Milla?"

Milla huffs "It's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before they see each other when she is going towards him at the altar."

I laugh at that but stop resisting and walk take a seat in the small armchair in the bedroom. "First there is no altar. And second I think that tradition was started more to make sure no one tried to get an early start on their honeymoon and it is for sure to late for that."

Shauna and Milla laughed but nodded. "True but I can't wait to see his face as he sees you for the first time walking down the aisle to him." Milla says as she winks at me.

Shauna nods "I would never have thought a week ago I would be agreeing to that or even imagining Eric would be standing at the end of an aisle waiting for his bride to be. It seems all so sudden for me but for you guys, I guess for you two it feels like too long."

Shauna doesn't know everything but she knows that Eric and I have known each other for a long time and that something happened to drive us apart. Only Logan, Milla, Tris and Edward know the what kept us apart. Tris and I had talked more about that while we got dressed and the rest of the girls were being decorating and organizing whirlwinds.

I nod and smile sadly. "It does but it also feels a bit overwhelming in general. It also feels amazing and like a weight had been lifted now that he is back in my life."

She sighs and looks thoughtful. "Zeke and I have sort of been together since we were kids too. He had to grow up kind of fast when his dad passed away. He had Uri and his sister Laura to look after and to help his mom out. Even with that it was hard for him to admit that he wanted to be a real couple. I honestly didn't think he would ever want to be more than just sometimes…."

She trailed off and I nodded. "He was exploring?"

She shrugged with a smirk. "That is what he said but when it came down to it he just flirted a lot but never did anything with anyone else. I think growing up in Dauntless...it was like he felt like he SHOULD be exploring and not committed to just one girl when he was so young."

"Did you ever want to explore?" I ask her seriously interested. I knew that I had been curious and thinking I should at least try with Peter or someone since at that time I never thought Eric and I would be possible.

She tilted her head in thought. "At times when I would see him trying to use his Pedrad charm on someone I thought of doing the same with someone else. I just decided that I wouldn't worry what other people or even what he was doing. I knew that I wanted him and I wasn't going to settle or just hook up with someone because I wanted to get back at him or because it was expected."

"Yeah. I discovered something similar myself." I agreed and we both smiled at each other.

Milla stood after she got a message. "It's time." She beamed at me and I know I had said I wasn't nervous but a sudden wave of nervousness hit.

What if he didn't like the dress? What if he changed his mind? All these random worries starting flooding my mind as I took her hand when she helped me up. I guess I must have been trembling a little because she squeezed it gently before she opened the door to let Edward in. "You look beautiful and he is for sure going to be blown away when you come towards him."

I let out a shaky breath and nod for her to go ahead and let Edward in. I guess I would find out soon enough.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hey everyone! I know it has been a minute or two since I have updated this fic and bunches of others. I intend to get to them all. I have outlines and several chapters for the majority of everything I have written but I also have severe ADD apparently. So...I have opened a POLL on my profile and requested the good peoples help. Help me help myself.**

 **As far as Zoe and Eric...I have had some inspiration and some inspiring talks with a few people. Sleepy1177, my sister from anotha mista...seriously thank you for kicking my butt and telling me it was all going to be ok. Damn you Kylie...thanks for the peep talk and your inspiring stories! Now on with the show!**

 **Disclaimer: This is still V Roth's thunder-dome...I just like shoving Eric into it with my stick figures and plots to mix up the greatness.**

 **Chapter 11**

 _Eric's POV_

"You are going to wear a rut into the concrete of the balcony if you keep that up." Logan says in a chuckle to me as I am pacing impatiently at the end of the mock aisle waiting for my first sight of Zoe in what felt like way to fucking long.

I scowl over at him but then wipe it off my face as I see her friends coming filing out from the apartment onto the balcony.

Lauren smiles at me and nods. "Edward is with her right now."

Max claps and smirks at me. "Right then. Let's get this shit started. Eric, if you would stand in front of me." He says this as he moves to stand in front of what was arranged where we will be standing to get married.

It is just a curtain of hanging lights but it works for the purpose. I take my place and suddenly feel like a damn fifteen year old as I frown and smooth my hands over the dress pants Logan insisted that Milla insisted I go get and wear.

Not that I minded really, I wanted to make this special for Zoe too. It wasn't like I wore a suit though. Just a pair of dress pants, a black button up dress shirt and dress shoes.

Soon everyone is standing on a side of the flower petal strewn center and I swallow as I can see movement at the door.

She has her arm linked with Edward and at first I can see her frown of nervousness and even worry.

I realize that is replaced with a mirror image of the slow smile that starts to spread across my face as I take her in. She is beautiful but she always is and always has been to me.

She is also in the perfect choice for this, her and us. She wouldn't want something too girly, all white or too revealing. Between her smile, the dress and knowing that she is and will be mine….I feel like I might pass out from lack of oxygen.

It doesn't take long for her to be in front of me. I could hear chuckling as she walked from all around because she was definitely pulling Edward down the aisle.

Edward smirks at her shaking his head and puts her hand in mine. That is the last thing I am aware of from around us for a few seconds because all I see is her.

A smug smile starts to come across her face as she moves closer to me and her hand goes to the side of my face.

"Breath baby." She whispers with a smile but I can tell she is not only reminding me to breath….but also herself.

I let out a small chuckle and take a deep breath at the same time. I shake my head afterwards and smile widely. "Beautiful."

It is all I have time for before Max clears his throats and starts the ceremony.

"We all know why we are here. We also know I am not the best with sentimental bullshit or flowery words. But I will say it is my honor to be able to oversee this union. One a long time in coming. You two, take each other's hands. You have vows you would like to say. Eric you start first." Max had wiped the emotion from his face.

A move I recognized was to keep from showing too much. Something I understood all too well but there was no way I was doing that right now. So I tuned everyone out but Zoe.

My eyes took in hers, her smile and I focused on the rise and fall of her chest along with the beat of her heart I could feel from where my fingers rested on her wrist.

I took a calming breath before I began to speak.

"Zoe, I take you to be my wife from this time onward. To join with you and share all that is to come. To be your faithful husband. To give and receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond; a commitment made in love, kept in faith and eternally made new."

I squeezed her hands slightly and my forehead furrowed with the seriousness and complete meaning behind these next vows.

"I love you enough to fight for you, compromise for you, and sacrifice myself for you if need be. Enough to miss you when we're apart no matter what length of time it is for and regardless of the distance. Enough to believe in our relationship, to stand by it through the worst of times, to have faith in our strength as a couple and to never give up on us. Enough to spend the rest of my life with you, be there for you when you need me or want me and never, ever want to leave you or to live without you."

We had both moved closer so that now my hands were around her waist and our chests were pressed together. One hand went to cup her cheek and my tone was filled with all that I felt about this. Love for her, happiness that she was mine but also the graveness and seriousness about what we knew was coming up. These vows felt right because we knew the storm ahead. We knew we were in the center of it and we needed to let each other know that through it all, we promised to come back to each other.

I needed her to know that I would come back to her. I had already made plans to protect her and me from anything Jeanine could fucking throw our way again.

"I will do everything I can to stay safe when I am away from you because I understand that I have a responsibility not just to my faction and our city, but to our life together. Every moment that we are apart, trust that I am thinking of you and counting the moments till we can be back together."

"I promise to work at our love and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart, I will love you Zoe. This is my solemn vow."

I wanted to kiss her so fucking bad right now. I had barely remembered the part where I was supposed to slide the ring on her finger. Max had to hold it out in front of my face to remind me and I heard chuckles from everyone around as we both blinked then scowled for a moment at the interruption to being lost in each other.

We smirked at each other as I took the ring after moving the hand I had on the side of her face. She moved the hand that was on my chest and held it up for me to slide the ring on as I had resumed saying the last part of our vows.

I see Max nod approvingly and with an amused smile before he looks to Zoe. "Your turn Zoe."

Zoe takes a breath and I can see her eyes shining with the beginnings of tears that she won't let herself cry.

"Eric, I take you to be my husband from this time onward. To join with you and share all that is to come. To be your faithful wife. To give and receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond; a commitment made in love, kept in faith and eternally made new."

Her tone became fierce and firm while still holding all that love she had always felt for me in it.

"I love you enough to fight for you, compromise for you, and sacrifice myself for you if need be. Enough to miss you when we're apart no matter what length of time it is for and regardless of the distance. Enough to believe in our relationship, to stand by it through the worst of times, to have faith in our strength as a couple and to never give up on us. Enough to spend the rest of my life with you, be there for you when you need me or want me and never, ever want to leave you or to live without you."

"I will do everything I can to stay safe when I am away from you because I understand that I have a responsibility not just to my faction and our city, but to our life together. Every moment that we are apart, trust that I am thinking of you and counting the moments till we can be back together."

"I promise to work at our love and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart and until it stops beating I will love you Eric. This is my solemn vow."

With the last part she had slipped her father's ring onto my finger and one single tear had broken free at that. We both looked at it for a moment and breathed deeply. I could just imagine Amar and his expression if he were here. His face cracking into his lopsided smile before he winked and then went back to his normal scowl.

"By the power invested in me by the faction of Dauntless and our city, I now pronounce you two married. Everyone please welcome Eric and Zoe Coulter." Max cracked a smile and then laughed when I glared at a part he was missing.

"Oh yeah...you may kiss your bride."

"Bout fucking time." I muttered then cupped the back of Zoe's head but I didn't need to pull her to my mouth she was already moving there on her own after she muttered a soft 'agreed'.

Zoe isn't the only one that ends up feeling dazed or disoriented from our kisses. From the first one we shared whatever normal control I had over my body was gone when she touched me. Hell even when she isn't touching me all I can want is for her to be.

This isn't any different and only the sound of pointed coughing stops me from just walking her over to the stone wall that closes off the balcony and taking her right there.

I pull back enough to press our foreheads together as we both need a moment to catch our breath and composure before we turn and face everyone.

"Would it be terribly rude if I just yelled at everyone to go away so I could have you all to myself and naked right now?" Zoe panted out in a bare whisper.

I couldn't help the deep chuckle at that but then the groan because I knew I wanted it and it wasn't going to happen. "You are asking _me_ if I think it would be rude to do that? Not the best person to ask about matters of manners baby. If I could I would be ordering all of them out of the door right now before I took you right here." My voice has gone husky with desire but also frustration.

"Come on you two...there will be time later for what I know you are plotting!" Milla calls out in a sing song voice and I hear laughter around us.

With a sigh and one more kiss we both nod to each other saying we are ready. I still hold her to my side as we turn and face a group of beaming friends.

Although I can't help but notice that Peter isn't quite beaming. He isn't frowning but I can tell he is still torn on how he _should_ feel about this. One look at Zoe's face, smiling and her dimples showing, and he gets a genuine lopsided smile of happiness for her.

Maybe I won't have to drop him into the chasm then.

I try not to growl as Zoe is torn from my arms by a gaggle of women who then proceed to start to hug her and 'ooh' or 'aah' over her ring. Logan claps a hand on my shoulder as we walk to the living room and over to the bar that is only partially stocked with what I had in my kitchen.

I have to admit it is nice in the apartment. Max's words about Zoe having lived underground struck home in me and all I can think about both then and now, was that I was going to do everything I could to make sure she never had to hide away like that again.

I loved the bunker and I knew that we were going to love going there to live when not having to be here. But damned if I wasn't happy that while we were going to be in the compound she would have a place where she was surrounded by light.

There was already going to be enough darkness ahead in our future. As Logan poured me a glass of something and everyone else roamed around I looked to him seriously.

He lifted his glass and tilted his head. "What's up?"

"Did you get on finding those things I asked about?" I kept my voice low enough that no one would hear. I would tell Zoe eventually but right now I wanted to make sure it was possible to get the shit first.

Logan's eyes flashed with understanding and he nodded. "I have someone working on getting everything. You said you remember what she was spouting about when she dosed you. You think this will help if she tries it again?"

My lips thin as my hand clenches around the glass. "I don't know for sure and I don't know for sure she will try. She is a vindictive bitch though Logan and my marrying Zoe, her becoming a leader already….it is going to get back to her and soon. I would rather be prepared for the worst than think she wouldn't go that far again."

Logan's eyes and face hardened as he nodded. "Then I will try to expedite that. It might take a few days or a week for it to be synthesized but I will see if I can prod them to bump it up."

"Zoe, let's go get you changed!" I hear Milla call out and start pulling Zoe to our new bedroom.

I frown and see her scowling at Milla.

"Why can't I wear what I am wearing?" She asks in a clearly annoyed tone.

Milla rolls her eyes and laughs. "Because we are going dancing after this remember. You also did say I could pick out what you were going to wear and I had it all planned out. So let's go."

"I let you help pick this out, can't a girl get a break." Zoe grumbles but she goes along with Milla and a few of the other girls back to the room.

Milla, Lauren and Mar have these almost wicked looks and I can only groan at what they might have planned for her to wear.

Logan laughs and points to my glass. "Might want to get that down you. My girl is for sure up to something with that look."

I shrug and get a smirk on my face and a wicked gleam in my eyes. "Your girl was also looking very much like she was envious of the whole wedding idea. Looks like someone is going to be joining the married men side very soon if she has anything to say about it."

Logan had been in the middle of drinking and he choked a little on the amber liquid before he pulled the glass back and cleared his throat. At first he was grimacing but then his head tilted and a slow smile spread on his face.

"I thought I would be freaking out about that idea but…" Logan got serious as he looked at me.

I nodded. "It feels like you need to get it in before the shit rains down."

He nodded and shrugged. "It isn't like I hadn't thought about it before with her. I just always said there is time. If we have anything to say about it there will still be time but I get the need for wanting to do it now."

Max joined us at the bar and shared in a drink with us before he left to go ready for dinner, make sure the certificate was sent off to Candor and then get the announcements done to the rest of leadership before they were given to the rest of Dauntless.

He also gave Zoe and I the option of not doing training or working tomorrow. I already knew Zoe was going to be turning that down. She had her friends she was worried about and would want to be there with them.

I would at least convince her to not do the early morning training and maybe even going in later in the morning when they started the physical portion after lunch. I planned on trying to keep her in our bed for as long as possible tomorrow.

This was just reinforced for me when Zoe made her way out into the living room again minutes later. The dress they had her in had me really wanting to order them all to get the fuck out then taking her on the floor right fucking there.

She was in that teal dress that I got a glimpse of her in while she was trying it on in the shop. It was body hugging with a scoop neckline, long sleeves and went to about mid thigh but it was also backless and made her ass look amazing.

I didn't know if I was going to survive the fucking night. I didn't know if anyone that tried to approach her would survive a few seconds with how it was making me feel right now.

Fuck it I am dragging her ass to somewhere and at least kissing her ass senseless.

I am moving before I even complete the thought and have her hand as I head to the first door in the hallway. A bathroom. Whatever, perfect.

I don't even let her speak before I close the door and press her up against it and take her mouth.

Our tongues battle as I plunder her mouth and my hands move over her until I reach her ass. I cup her and moan at the way she fills my hands but then I pull back panting with a frown.

"Fuck Zoe, please fucking tell me you are wearing underwear under there." I growl this out because I wasn't feeling any under my hands.

Zoe swallows and blushes. "Underwear of sorts. There is something there but they could barely be called….."

I don't even let her finish before I groan out. "Fuck." Then claim her mouth again.

I am am torn between wanting to kill Milla for this and wanting to fucking thank her.

There is a knock at the door after my mouth had moved to Zoe's neck and my hands had been inching up the hem of her dress.

"Time to go!" Logan calls through the closed door.

"Gods dammit." I get out as we pull back. We take a few moments to get ourselves together, I have to adjust myself but I already know my damn bulge isn't going anywhere anytime soon with her looking the way she does.

Once I have her straightened out though I cup her face and kiss her softly. "I love you Zoe. You looked beautiful out on the balcony and right now you are literally bringing me to my knees baby. Just plan on being in the damn bed with me until at least lunch."

She gets that wicked gleam I love with the one dimple at the corner of her mouth as she smiles. "I had already planned on trying to find a way to keep you there anyways. I love you too Eric." Then she kisses me softly before she pulls back and I can see her plotting something. "I do believe tonight it will be my turn to find out how you taste baby."

She says this in a breathy seductive voice as she lets her hand brush against me before she laughs and jumps back when I was about to grab her to me.

"Zoe." I growl out a warning but it is too late, she is already opening the door. She barely gets it open before a hand whips in and pulls her out with laughter.

"I knew it had to open sometime. Come on let's go eat and then dance!" Lauren says and then gulps slightly at my glare I give her.

She bravely squares her shoulders though, shrugs and links arms with Zoe before she walks them towards the door.

I walk behind them, watching Zoe's ass and steel myself for a long fucking night before I can get her back home.


End file.
